Oasis

by Banshi

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Part Three

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In another unofficial raid of Quatre's quarters, Wufei found three more volumes of Quatre's journals. The first dates were all before the three volumes he already had, but that didn't put Wufei's mind at ease. They had been sitting innocently on the shelf just to the left of Quatre's desk … where the other volumes had been the first time. Wufei grabbed them, nearly storming to Rashid's temporary office, journals in hand.

"Who else has been in there in the last three days?" Thankfully Rashid was sitting, so Wufei didn't have to glare quite so far up. His expression softened when shock registered on the other man's face.

"Only Serviay and his team. I didn't see anyone take anything into or out of the room." Rashid's gaze was on the thick books in Wufei's arms. They both knew that someone else had had access to them between Quatre's departure and Wufei's first look at the study.

Wufei cringed at the invasion of his friend's privacy as much as at the security breach. Nobody had the right to Quatre's private thoughts, and even now, Wufei wasn't going to look at more than the very last page of the very last volume, just to try and find out where his friend had gone.

"Find out who it was, and what they wanted. I doubt Quatre would appreciate the Tabloids blaring anything while he's not here to defend himself." Wufei sighed, hefting the books and leaving the office. Rashid nodded, he waived Wufei good-night and turned to his security records.

Wufei was still storming as he walked to his car. It was the kind of storm that made people jump to get out of his way, and he was thankful for that. In his current mood, if Serviay showed up, Wufei might just attack the incompetent, and now questionable, man.

Once Wufei was safely by himself in his car, he took several deep, calming breaths and tried to order his thoughts. He knew that Quatre would have found a way to contact them if he was really in trouble. He knew that someone was snooping around Quatre's private quarters at the house, had probably gone through his office, and possibly his computer. Wufei made a mental note to ask Rashid to check up on the computer, if the man hadn't already.

None of this helped his mood. Quatre and he had just been repairing their friendship, had just gotten to the point where they could talk easily. Quatre was entitled to lead whatever life he chose, and Wufei wouldn't have stopped him, and even understood his chosen method of leaving his expected position behind. That someone would violate that, for any purpose caused Wufei great turmoil. He knew that he probably would have to turn to the journals to find Quatre, but there had been a rush of new leads in the last few days, so he could postpone that uneasy task.

Not if you want o find him. A voice at the back of Wufei's mind whispered to him. In his heart of hearts, Wufei knew that the voice was right. His own fledgling feelings wouldn't let him leave Quatre alone. Even if Quatre needed to be left to himself, Wufei wasn't going to just sit back and let him run away.

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Quatre debated with himself over contacting Wufei. he knew that the more time he spent worrying about it, the more time Wufei had to read the journals. He had turned on the vid-phone and dialed half of Wufei's number twice now. He just couldn't bring himself to finish it. He trusted Wufei, he admired Wufei, he even l...liked Wufei. Wufei scared him. His feelings scared him. All of which Wufei was on the verge of finding out. Instinctively Quatre knew that if Wufei had decided to find him, found he would be. He just wanted to be able to look the other man in the eye when that happened.

Quatre finally decided to let it be, and trust Wufei to respect his privacy. Wufei would know the limits, and hopefully avoid the entries dated around the Eve Wars, just out of his own discomfort with that time. Quatre sat outside, huddled in a blanked, admiring the stars, and thinking everything through. For the first time in a long time, he meditated, as he had been taught by one of his sisters, in her Buddhist faze. He felt at peace, and even smiled a little as he imagined the look on Wufei's face when the other man found out that the spoiled rich-kid could meditate. Then he smiled a lot as he realized that Wufei had never treated him as a spoiled rich-kid, only as a fellow warrior.

It made his heart glow, even as all the problems came swirling back into his thoughts.

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I am so sick of sitting behind a desk and having people lie, cheat and steal to get into my good graces. It's sad and pathetic watching some of the most powerful men in the world treat me like a new prince or something. I never thought that I'd say this, but I was happier being a Gundam pilot.

Wufei felt his eyes widen as he read the last line. he had known that Quatre hadn't really fit with his new civilian role, but to have been so unhappy and so angry with it...

That morning, after another late night of fruitless searching, Wufei had decided that the game had gone on long enough. There was a snoop in Quatre's house, personal material had been stolen, presumably read, and then returned. Wufei needed to find his friend. So he was reading the last week of Quatre's journal, trying to follow the other man's thinking. Hopefully to find a clue, a hint or something. What Wufei had found was that his friend was in pain, and hadn't told anyone, and so no-one had helped. No wonder he was gone.

Wufei chewed on his bottom lip, and continued reading.

Wufei was on the news today. He intercepted a big arms shipment. He handled himself with dignity, as usual. He seems so comfortable with his new life, I almost envy him. To fit in so well, doing things that are so alike and yet so different from what we did during the war. It must be nice, seeing those same trusted faces everyday, and getting to do so much good. I wonder if he ever feels as bogged down and useless as I do. Even if he does have to do lots of paperwork, it can't be as bad all the bureaucratic nonsense coming to my desk.

Look at this, and I promised not to be so self-centered and whiny. I just... I miss them, and I miss having friends to talk to without the media, and my own company looking over my shoulder. What I wouldn't give just to have an uninterrupted lunch with Wufei one of these days.

Feeling guilty, and decidedly voyeuristic, Wufei nearly put the book down. He really had no right to look through Quatre's private thoughts like this, but...

Curiosity and duty warred with loyalty to his principles and his friend. The justification that he was doing this in order to find Quatre returned to him, and the war was lost. He continued reading, his eyes widening slowly as page after page went by. At first the words, and the emotions behind them, refused to register in his mind, until he couldn't deny what he was seeing. He was seeing Quatre's motive for leaving, and his own hope for salvation.

An honest, large smile suddenly spread across Wufei's face.

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Another day, another news piece on his personal history. Quatre was getting sick of listening to "analysts" discussing his motivations for being a Gundam pilot, for taking over the company even though he was underage, for running away. He was tempted to write, but just looking at the blank notebook that was acting as his journal brought back all of the anxiety about what was happening with the old ones. It was nerve-wracking to think of Wufei reading his thoughts about, well, Wufei.

Quatre felt himself blushing. The only thing worse than Wufei reading them was anyone else reading them. Especially the poetry. Quatre put his head in his hands in despair, his cheeks still red with embarrassment . He really hoped that Wufei didn't come across any of the poetry, because most of that poetry was about Wufei.

"Can I just curl up and die now?" Quatre mumbled into his hands, already knowing the answer. Fate was laughing at him.

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continued in part four