Oasis

by Banshi

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Part Four

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It took some negotiating with Rashid, a little hacking, and the best global positioning system he could get his hands on, but Wufei had finally located Quatre's desert retreat. He had started packing the second he had found out about the place.

Wufei blew his still damp and loose hair out of his eyes as he paused in his mental tirade against his friend, and himself, and the pair of jeans that refused to stay neatly folded. If he was going to be honest with himself, and he really didn't have a choice about it, Wufei had to admit that if he had been anyone else, and if he hadn't known the "sand" references, he wouldn't have figured it out at all.

That's what he was hoping anyway. The poem had been very descriptive, as long as the reader was familiar with standard western symbolism. Wufei blushed as he recalled the images that a sprang to his mind when he figured out what he was reading. Quatre really was an exquisite, and intense, poet.

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Quatre walked into his study after a leisurely breakfast and a long walk in the early morning dunes to find his computer beeping at him. He had walked half-way across the room when a cough interrupted his sudden panic. He spun around and was promptly lost in deep brown eyes. He even had the thought, that at this angle, with the sunlight coming in just so, Wufei's eyes glinted almost gold in places. It took him a moment, once he was sure his heart was beating again, to catch his breath and try to say something.

Wufei beat him to it. "I wouldn't have interrupted your vacation if it wasn't important. I apologize for the intrusion." Wufei put a hand over his hear, and gave a quick bow that was more of a nod. Utterly courteous. Maybe there was hope that he hadn't read the journals.

"I also thought that you would want these back." Wufei reached into the bag on his shoulder and withdrew six leather bound volumes. Quatre's heart sank, but he reached for them anyway. As his fingers touched the smooth covers, he felt a little better.

"Thank you." Quatre said quietly, "I was very anxious about them when I realized that I had forgotten to bring them." He clutched the books to his chest, but resisted the urge to hang his head, and met Wufei's gaze instead.

"As you should have been. That it what I wished to speak to you about." Wufei's voice had taken on a subtle note of seriousness that it had lacked before. If Quatre hadn't been paying so much attention to the other man's presence, he wouldn't have noticed the difference. Now, the change caught, and held his attention more than the subtle scent of… cinnamon, coming from Wufei. The Quatre remembered his manners.

"How rude of me! Come into the kitchen, make yourself comfortable. Would you like some tea?" Quatre asked questions over his shoulder as he lead Wufei through the house to his sunny kitchen. Suddenly his anxiety disappeared as he went about the task of making his friend comfortable. The journals sat in a stack on the far end of the table, where he hoped that they could both forget about them.

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Wufei stepped into the warm room, and immediately smelled that Quatre had eaten a tomato, spinach and feta cheese omelet for breakfast. He smiled to himself, and went to look out the large window on one side of the kitchen table. The view was breathtaking and bright, the sun hitting the sand dunes and making them sparkle. He could understand why Quatre was so fond of coming here.

"You gave everyone quite a chase. Rashid told me that if I didn't know your strategy tactics so well, even I wouldn't have managed to find you." He tried to say it casually, but he feared that his anxiety over what he would have to say next was showing through. Quatre paused with the tea kettle still in his hand, and turned to look at Wufei.

"Why did you need to find me? You knew that I was alright, I left all the clues there for you. And you know that I would have contacted you somehow if I was in trouble. Don't you?" Quatre's voice wavered between belligerent friend and uncertain boy. Wufei had to smile at this wonder's enchanting mix of confidence and uncertainty. The smile faded quickly.

"Yes, I know. It's not that I thought you needed help," ... in the immediate sense, Wufei added silently, "but that something happened while you were gone." Wufei swallowed passed the sudden lump in his throat, not wanting Quatre to know about the unforgivable invasion of his privacy. Quatre has to know! Wufei reminded himself sternly.

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"What happened?" Quatre could feel a strange mix of emotions coming from Wufei, and it alarmed him, more so because some of them were leaking into Wufei's expression. In Quatre's experience, that only happened when the situation was grim. Quatre grew even more alarmed when Wufei wouldn't meet his eyes, and had to clear his throat quietly twice before he could speak.

"When Rashid let me in to search for clues or a note, I found three journals in your study. As a resource of last resort I took them, intending to read only the very last entry if every other lead failed." Dread settled into the pit of Quatre's stomach, as his gaze went, reluctantly, to the six volumes on the table. He couldn't find the breath to say anything, even if he had wanted to interrupt Wufei. He didn't want to interrupt. "A week later, Rashid let me in again, because WEI's head of security is a bumbling idiot. I found three more volumes on the shelf, exactly where I had found the first three. I removed them as well, just in case someone came back to get them."

Quatre closed his eyes, feeling the world shift around him as the dread blossomed into a terrible cocktail of embarrassment, shame and fear that threatened to choke him. He still couldn't find breath, and he didn't want to even think about who could have been reading his most private thoughts. He was so caught up in just trying to breathe that he barely noticed when Wufei pushed him gently into a chair and rubbed his back in soothing circles. Dimly he became aware that his breathing was evening out, and Wufei was talking to him. He nearly apologized for not paying attention, but Wufei shushed him as soon as he opened his mouth.

"Do not worry for my feelings my friend, I am quite aware of the shock and violation this must be to you. Having many things that you cannot discuss with others is a burden. I am glad that you found a way to relieve that weight, and am deeply upset that anyone would violate your privacy as to steal such secrets." It was a more formal speech than Wufei usually gave these days, but this close Quatre could tell that he meant every word of it. There was also something else that sent a thrill up Quatre's spine, but was gone so quickly that Quatre could only identify his reaction, not what had caused hit. Wufei moved away, and Quatre immediately felt bereft of the other man's warmth.

"Is there anything else? Or did you decide that I needed to hear this in person?" Quatre asked after taking a deep breath to collect himself. Wufei leaned against the counter, and seemed to be studying the toes of his boots intently. Quatre could feel the weight of yet another shocking revelation, and knew that he wasn't going to like this second one any more than he'd liked the first.

Finally, Wufei spoke again. "Yes, there is something else. Once the theft had been discovered, it became even more important to find you, which didn't allow me to wait until all other options had been taken." Wufei paused to take a breath, but Quatre didn't want to hear any more. He knew what Wufei was going to say, and could feel a flush come to his face, and the deep need to have the earth swallow him up, before Wufei could look at him again. Still... a masochistic curiosity pushed to the center of his mind, and suddenly there were so many questions that he wanted to ask Wufei.

Quatre opened his mouth to... he didn't know what, just as long as it kept Wufei from saying anything else. "You don't need to say anything Wufei. I know what you found, besides my location here. I am well aware that, even if you only read the last entry, you couldn't help but find out. I'm sorry, I..."

Wufei had stepped away from the counter and put a firm hand on Quatre's shoulder, leaning down a little so that his dark gaze could keep hold of Quatre's frightened eyes. Quatre felt himself blushing even more, suddenly very ashamed of the feelings that he had tried so hard to hide, but had been found out anyway. He tried to look away, but found Wufei's hand on his chin, holding him in place before he could complete the action.

"Listen to me Quatre Raberba Winner. There is no shame. There is nothing to be afraid of. Whoever stole those books from you will meet justice. If anyone is to apologize here it is me, I had no right to look through anything so personal, even if it was necessary. I cannot unlearn what I have learned from your words." Quatre tried to pull away from that firm hold, those knowing eyes. He could feel tears threatening, and he really didn't want to cry in front of Wufei, especially not for this reason. Wufei continued, relentless. "And, unfortunately, I do not want to unlearn that you love me."

There it was, the words were out. Quatre caught his breath, as he seemed to be doing a lot since Wufei had walked in. He looked into those dark eyes, as a new emotion began flowing from Wufei to him, and it warmed him in a way he had never known.

"You... you too?" Quatre asked tentatively, barely daring to hope, even as Wufei let the emotions be felt through Quatre's empathy.

"I do not wish to forget how you feel about me, because it would require that I continue hiding what I feel for you. The joy that the revelation caused me to feel has been unequaled in my life. Forgive me the intrusion, in reading your journal. I will make it up to you, if you let me." Quatre felt too many things to put names to, but a smile spread across his face, and he knew a peace as all the fear and shame disappeared, even as his face warmed at the promise in Wufei's last statement.

Quatre let his new light-heartedness govern his words. "I forgive you in advance, but you'd better make good on that last promise."

Quatre was rewarded by a smile and a very quick kiss before Wufei moved back and straitened his uniform in an almost nervous gesture. Quatre would have panicked if he hadn't seen the slight smile that never left Wufei's face. "Oh, I will Quatre."

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concluded in part five