Title: Cold November Rain [part 21/?]

Book 1 of "Redirecting Destiny" and prequel to "Romantic Resolutions"

Author: Enigma

Series: Weiss Kreuz

Written: January-February, 2002

Rating: R

Pairings: (Yohji + Ken + Aya) (Omi + Nagi) (Brad + Schu)

Category: Dark! Yaoi Angst Action/Adventure Violence Blood Squick Language Romance. AU-OOC.

Archive: fanfiction.net [author: "E-sama the Llama"], Scripta Manent: http://digilander.iol.it/sakaba/Home.html

Spoilers: None, safe for new viewers as well as old.

Warnings: dark! yaoi, heavy angst, action/adventure, graphic violence, large quantities of blood, squick: medical and other, coarse language, agonized and overwrought romance, rare touches of sap, cigarettes, destiny, cruel cliffhangers, original characters. AU-OOC.

Disclaimer: "Weiss Kreuz" is the property of Koyasu Takehito and Project Weiss. This unauthorized work of fanfiction is intended for entertainment only; kindly do not sue me.

Notes: When Ken falls in battle, how can the other members of Weiss cope with the guilt and blame that they all seem to share and will he survive in spite of the odds against him?

++ date and time reference within the storyline beginning with the day of the battle ++

{{telepathic speech}}

*****

++ day: 2. time: 0700-0740 hours ++

*****

When Nagi awoke once more, he did so to a completely novel experience which he would discover he enjoyed every bit as much as he had hoped he might.

Blurry midnight blue eyes slowly opened to a dimly lit yet elegantly appointed room, but it wasn't the expensive furniture around him that caused a warm smile to blossom on his alabaster face, it was the angelic presence beside him which did. Laying beneath a warm comforter, scrub-clad arms and legs intertwined with his own, was a blond boy whose soft exhalations in sleep seemed more melodious than any orchestra Nagi had ever heard. The reassuring motion of the other teen's chest as air moved in and out of it was hypnotic and the telekinetic simply sighed happily and cuddled closer.

Barely still asleep since his body clock told him it was seven and time for school, Omi sensed the motion against him and stirred slightly.

Regretting that he'd awakened his sleeping boyfriend, Nagi tried to loosen his grip on the older boy's body only to find himself being pulled back into place firmly as a voice asked quietly, "Where're you going, Nagi-love?"

Nagi smiled as large cerulean eyes fluttered open and gazed across the few centimeters between his face and that of the one he loved before he assured softly, "I'm not going anywhere, koi. I just didn't mean to wake you up, that's all."

"You didn't wake me," the Weiss archer answered before yawning a little. "I usually get up now for school. Even when it's a holiday, I still wake up automatically. But why are you awake? You were so terribly tired last night, why aren't you sleeping in?"

"I can't 'sleep in' even if I try," Nagi admitted with a sad sigh, yet didn't mention that Omi was right, he did indeed need more sleep. "I was having some really weird dreams and it was easier to just wake up than to keep trying to get through them."

Omi was concerned by this, his own dreams had always brought him both joy and sadness yet on occasion they held warning for events to come as they did for almost anyone, Crawford's precognitive abilities simply being those natural talents multiply a thousandfold. Reaching up to brush some of Nagi's hair out of deep blue eyes, he asked, "What were you dreaming about, love? Would you like to tell me about it?"

Nagi paused and thought for a moment. Usually when he was bothered by dreams he couldn't understand or didn't want to have, he would talk to Schuldich about it, his German teammate always more than glad to help him try to sort out his feelings and try to keep things in perspective. He was certain that Omi wanted to do the same for him, but it wasn't as easy since he only had to let the telepath see inside his mind to gather the information he needed yet his boyfriend would need to hear about the images secondhand.

One thing neither teen could take into account since they were totally unaware of it, was that Nagi had not slept as undisturbed as he thought he had. The brief telepathic contact with Crawford and Schuldich had occurred at roughly the same time as the strange dream had begun. Even though the two psychic visitors had gone to great lengths to remain undetected, their presence may have influenced the images in the sleeper's mind, there was simply no way to know for certain.

Misunderstanding the brief silence, Omi frowned then forced a smile as he urged, "I don't mind hearing about it, Nagi, really I don't. No matter how weird they are, it can't be any worse than my own." He shrugged slightly and tried not to think about some of the most confounding images from his own dreams which included strange young men who called him by a name he didn't recognize.

Realizing he'd been remiss in answering, the Schwarz telekinetic spoke softly, "I know you want to help, Omi-koi, but I don't know how to explain what I saw." He frowned a little then said, "The one dream that I kept having over and over was really odd. I was alone and running, I'm not sure if I was running *to* something or *from* something, but I knew I had to keep running no matter what. I thought I heard voices, too."

"Oh?" Omi was intrigued by the rare look inside his lover's dreamlife, Nagi was a complex person whose past tainted so much of his present that it was easy to see how the images he was sharing could've come from memory or perhaps they meant something more. "Whose voices were they?"

"I'm not sure," Nagi admitted and then smiled unexpectedly, sharing morning thoughts like these while wrapped in his beloved's embrace was something that he'd never imagined could be so heartening. Thinking it over a little, he added, "I think I heard you and maybe Yohji-kun, but it seemed like Schu was there, too. And Crawford, maybe, I'm not too sure about him, but the other thing that got to me was that it was dark."

Cerulean eyes looked puzzled as the older teen asked, "Do you mean it was dark like it was nighttime?"

"No, I mean like totally dark, like I was blind or something," Nagi's smile faded and he shook his head at the impossible concept he was trying to express and tried to deny the dream by saying, "See? What did I tell you? It doesn't make any sense. If I was blind, then how could I have been running?"

Omi was thoughtful as he answered, "I don't know, Nagi-love, but dreams can be very powerful. Just because they make no sense at first doesn't mean they aren't trying to tell us something."

"Maybe," the diminutive psychic agreed hesitantly, then his smile returned as he changed the subject by saying lovingly, "I really like waking up like this, koi. It's nice to be in your arms first thing in the morning."

Warmth spread through Omi's thoughts and into his heart as he pulled the too-slender boy closer, the embrace becoming one neither wished to end yet knowing it was only a matter of time before it did.

Running his hands up and down Nagi's back comfortingly, Omi said, "Oh yes, I like it, too, Nagi-love. I'm just sorry it had to be because something so awful happened yesterday." Sighing deeply, he released the tension in his arms slightly so that Nagi could pull back and receive a tender kiss from him before he completed his thoughts, asking, "Do you still want to go with me to see Ken-kun today? It would be nice if he has woken up by now, wouldn't it?"

Nagi felt sadness wash over them both as they were reminded of their injured friend and they both moved subtly closer once more, seeking reassurance that each was truly present for the other as they prepared mentally to face another difficult day. After brushing a brief kiss to Omi's neck, the telekinetic answered quietly, "Yes, koi, I'd very much like a chance to get to see Ken-kun, but only if it's still okay with Aya-kun and Yohji-kun. They need as much time with him as possible, it seems to me."

Omi sighed deeply, nodded and then said, "That's true, but I also believe that it would be good for Ken-kun to know you're here, love. I think you underestimate how much it will mean to him that someone other than just us are here for him." The usually genki youth remained somber as he explained unhappily, "Ken-kun doesn't have a lot of friends besides us and the kids he teaches soccer to. Of course, they're too little to come visit him in a hospital and we'll go to a lot of trouble to conceal what really happened to him so they can see him later, but right now, it's just us. So knowing you're here will help him, I'm sure of it."

For once in his life, Nagi tried hard to believe the complimentary things someone was saying about him. A childhood spent on the streets followed by years of the abuse that Estet called "training" had left him unsure of his own worth despite a number of people's words to the contrary.

The Japanese member of Schwarz had never believed the pedophiles who took advantage of his body so casually as a child when they said he was beautiful and it had taken Omi long hours of effort to convince him it was true when their relationship had turned physical.

Nagi's intellect had likewise been prostituted by those whom Crawford had delivered the telekinetic to and despite having excellent grades in school, he continued to believe himself less than the gifted soul that he was. Farfarello during his most lucid moments often engaged him in debate and tried to prove to the overly humble boy he had more to offer than computer hacking skills and his extraordinary mind-over-matter talent.

Schuldich was quite concerned about the boy's reclusive nature, trying to draw Nagi into social events from time to time as well as encouraging him to take an interest in the things kids his own age did for fun, yet his words fell on deaf ears. If the German had actually known that the boy he cared so much about had found someone special he most likely would've been thrilled about it, except for the specific detail regarding who the boy's paramour was, of course.

However, on this morning after one of the greatest tragedies Weiss had ever faced as a team, Nagi lay in a hotel bed wrapped in his beloved's embrace and did his level best to believe he could make a difference for the chocolate-eyed man they were so worried about. After trying to find a way to say what he wished more eloquently, he finally simply said, "I hope so, koi. I'm glad that you'll be with me when I see him, too. I'm not always comfortable speaking to people even when they *can* talk back to me, I have no idea what to say to someone who can't."

Omi gave him an encouraging smile and a hug before saying confidently, "I'm sure you'll do just fine, love! I think it's more important that we just talk to him more than exactly what we say. As long as we tell him we're there and we want him to get better, everything ought to work out for the best." After the previous day's guilt and sorrow, the Weiss archer was making a massive effort to be more upbeat about matters and refused to add any caveats regarding Ken possibly not surviving at all.

Nagi regarded his lover with hopeful eyes and might have even asked to hear more of the reassurances he was finding strength in when his stomach growled.

Looking embarrassed, he glanced at the clock and tried not to notice the tiny grin Omi was fighting as he asked, "Do you want to go get some breakfast with me, Nagi-love? I'm hungry, too."

"Um, well," trying to put it off in favor of staying in bed with his boyfriend after their first entire night together, one which had been entirely chaste due to the circumstances which had brought them together the day before, Nagi stalled only a moment before the noise came again.

Laughing quietly even as he nuzzled the abashed youth, Omi made the decision for them both by announcing, "Well, *I* need something to eat! Let's go see what room service has for breakfast, okay? I bet they have lots of different kinds of food and I'd love some bacon and waffles." After placing a last kiss on his boyfriend's lips, he scrambled out of bed and tugged at the now rumpled surgical scrubs in annoyance before proclaiming, "I hope that Manx doesn't forget to get some clothes for us at the Koneko. I know I saw our assassin's gear here last night, but I don't want to wear that all day, those shorts make me look like a little kid."

After thinking to himself that he rather enjoyed the sight of his boyfriend in the adorable loose shorts, Nagi reluctantly crawled out of bed, too, and frowned as he brushed at the rumpled scrubs he was still wearing and asked curiously, "But what am I supposed to wear today, Omi-koi? I didn't see my school uniform with the leathers and everything." He finger-combed his hair and silently wished for a toothbrush, but clothes were the first order of business.

Omi considered this as he went to the closet to retrieve the soft terrycloth robes the hotel provided for the wealthy patrons who ordinarily paid exorbitant rates for the suite they were in and then moved to drape one warmly around his boyfriend's too-slender form. Silently delighted by how cute the petite telekinetic looked in the oversized white robe, he said aloud, "Don't worry about it too much, love. You weren't with us when we first arrived at Tokyo General yesterday morning and that's when Kritiker took our stuff. Maybe Manx had someone come for yours later and you'll get it back soon?" He slipped his own robe on and added with a gentle smile, "In the meantime, you can wear some of my clothes if you like, Nagi-love. If they bring a couple sets of things there should be something of mine that fits you, don't you think?"

Surprise tickled Nagi's mind as he considered wearing his boyfriend's clothes in public and how the other members of Weiss might react. Before he knew it, a dusting of rose was scattered across his pale cheeks and it didn't take words for Omi to know his offer had been accepted.

With a gentle laugh, Omi moved to take Nagi by the hand as they prepared to walk out of the room and into the living area unaware that the two elder assassins had been out during the night. He gave the younger teen one last tender kiss and then he reached for the door knob saying quietly, "We ought to keep our voices down in case Yohji-kun and Aya-kun are still in bed, love. Think they got enough sleep to make up for the rest they missed night before last?"

Nagi shook his head, "I have no idea, koi. I don't remember even getting to bed last night myself. Either way, I hope they did, it's apt to be another long day."

"That's true, unfortunately," the cerulean-eyed boy agreed dispiritedly, opened the door and led the way towards the first challenge of their day.

*****

As the pair of teens stepped quietly into the living area of the suite, they both froze as they saw who was unexpectedly there ahead of them.

Sitting in a chair staring morosely out the door to the balcony, Aya kept a brooding vigil over a white-robed figure silhouetted against the rainy sky and surrounded by a sooty cloud of cigarette smoke. The violet-eyed man's hair was damp from a recent shower and he ignored a bead of water that slipped free from a red velvet lock and trailed down his neck to disappear on his bare chest beneath the white terrycloth. While it was clear he'd been up for awhile, there was nothing about the Weiss swordsman that spoke of rest much less sleep.

Afraid of interrupting something, Omi started to turn around, intending to lead his boyfriend back to their room so they could decide what to do, Aya's deep voice called quietly to them, "You can come out now, Omi, Nagi. I already heard you there."

The scarlet-haired man hadn't turned from where he continued to stare at Yohji who was outside and looking distraught for reasons the boys wouldn't discover for some time, yet he then continued by saying, "Manx sent a courier over with some clothes for us, Omi. They're over on the couch if you want them." An ivory hand gestured behind himself as he added belatedly, "Oh, and Nagi? Your uniform was cleaned and it's there, too."

"Arigatou, Aya-kun," Nagi said quietly, unconsciously adding a polite bow to his words before he could recall that such formality wasn't necessary around the men who were once enemies yet were now unexpectedly becoming the closest of friends.

Omi cleared his throat nervously, then decided to bravely risk asking the wrong thing by inquiring, "Aya-kun? Has something gone wrong for Ken-kun?"

Violet eyes blinked as the question sank into the swordsman's mind and he finally turned towards the two teens and frowned slightly as he shook his head, "No, there's been no news on Ken since I called a few hours ago. There's been no significant change since last night."

A sense of dread touched Omi's heart as he felt more than heard the caution in the older man's voice, but he pursued the matter, stepping closer to his teammate and asking, "What happened last night, Aya-kun? Please tell me." He glanced at Nagi who was frowning slightly and added quickly, "'Us'. I mean, please tell *us* what's going on? Why is Yohji-kun out there alone? He looks so unhappy right now."

Aya shook his head again in negation, scarlet earlocks twitching around his face even as he refused to answer, "I can't really tell you that just now, Omi. I think that it would be best if we let Yohji say what he feels he wants to about his own issues. As for Ken, well, why don't I make some more coffee and we can talk about it." He rose gracefully and Nagi winced internally at the sight of a long, recently-healed scar across Aya's left calf where Farfarello had gotten a little too enthusiastic while following Crawford's orders to keep Abyssinian out of the way while he himself escorted Reiji Takatori from a building.

A slight frown marred ivory features as Aya realized what the Schwarz psychic was staring at and then he broke the uncomfortable moment by saying in a conciliatory tone, "Don't worry about it, Nagi. It's all part of the job."

"I know, it's just…"

Nagi's words were interrupted by the older assassin who stated firmly, "I mean it, Nagi. Don't worry over the injuries Schwarz and Weiss have exchanged in the past. You are no more responsible for them than Omi is for any your teammates carry from us." He gave both boys a look that told them now was not the time to argue and then he added firmly, "I'll make coffee. We'll talk in ten minutes." Without waiting for them to acknowledge his orders, the scarlet-haired man turned to the task of making them something hot to drink.

The two teenagers knew a dismissal when they heard one and went off to discover that one of the many amenities the suite boasted was an assortment of much needed toiletries in the bathroom. They silently prepared for the upcoming conversation and hoped against hope that there wasn't any truly devastating news to be shared, yet between Yohji's distance and Aya's closed nature, there would be no way to know until it was too late.

*****

To be continued.

Full Author's Notes to Run at Conclusion.

Please be advised: Parts 21 & 22 will be posted together.