Title: Cold November Rain [part 45/?]
Book 1 of "Redirecting Destiny" and prequel to "Romantic Resolutions"
Author: Enigma
Series: Weiss Kreuz
Written: January-March, 2002
Rating: R
Pairings: (Yohji + Ken + Aya) (Omi + Nagi) (Brad + Schu)
Category: Dark! Yaoi Angst Action/Adventure Violence Blood Squick Language Romance Original Characters. AU-OOC.
Archive: fanfiction.net [author: "E-sama the Llama"], Scripta Manent: http://digilander.iol.it/sakaba/Home.html
Spoilers: None, safe for new viewers as well as old.
Warnings: dark! yaoi, heavy angst, action/adventure, graphic violence, large quantities of blood, squick: medical and other, coarse language, agonized and overwrought romance, original characters designed to highlight the true stars, rare touches of sap, cigarettes, destiny, cruel cliffhangers. AU-OOC.
Disclaimer: "Weiss Kreuz" is the property of Takehito Koyasu and Project Weiss. All original characters featured herein (including but not limited to: Calico, Norwegian, Korat, Sokoke, etc.) are © Enigma, 2002, and are not to be used without permission. This unauthorized work of fanfiction is intended for entertainment only; kindly do not sue me.
Notes: When Ken falls in battle, how can the other members of Weiss cope with the guilt and blame that they all seem to share and will he survive in spite of the odds against him?
++ date and time reference within the storyline beginning with the day of the battle ++
{{telepathic speech}}
*****
++ day: 4. time: 1800-1845 hours. ++
*****
As soon as they were certain that Nagi and Omi had left hearing range, Aya and Yohji turned their attention on Norwegian as he had fully expected them to yet it was still somewhat disconcerting to find himself under such intense scrutiny from two accomplished assassins.
Anger roiling in violet eyes, the Weiss swordsman glared at the doctor for a moment and then forced himself to redirect his fury to his secondary target as he growled, "I never thought I'd say this, but right now, I feel like tracking down that bastard Crawford and slamming him against a wall for reasons that pertain to his *own* team instead of *mine*!"
Jade eyes which had been filled with determination blinked in surprise for a moment and then Yohji asked, "Really, Aya? I was thinking of something similar but I hadn't been planning to get violent about it." Seeing a look of inquiry on his scarlet-haired partner's face he explained with a shrug, "Actually, I was thinking that perhaps Schuldich might be the better one to approach. Nagi *did* indicate he's the one who takes care of him when he's hurt and all."
"That's true," Aya responded grudgingly before adding after his earlier anger rekindled, "But I still think that the fucking precog should be held accountable! If he's their *leader* then he sure as hell has a responsibility to his teammates! *Especially* the youngest! Nagi's still just a kid and if Crawford can't even do something as simple as provide enough food for him to eat to be healthy, that bastard's got no right to tell Nagi what to do much less send him into danger for Schwarz!!"
The Weiss field-leader's anger was understandable to a point, yet since none of those around him knew of the bafflingly strong inner feelings the scarlet-haired man held for the diminutive telekinetic, the strength of his assertions was quite unexpected.
After giving the elder of his two lovers' heated words some consideration, Yohji turned towards their brunette partner and asked, "What do *you* think about all of this, baby?" Seeing that the recovering patient was obviously tired after staying awake for longer than usual lately, he added more tenderly, "I mean, I know you need some rest and all, Ken-love, but you're as much a part of this as we are. Was there anything you wanted to say about the situation with Nagi?"
With an exhausted sigh as he moved slightly to gaze at the dispirited Kritiker physician for a moment before focusing on his two lovers, the chocolate-eyed teen remarked, "Frankly, I'm disappointed, Yohji." He inhaled the oxygen-rich air being fed to him by the tubing attached to his face, then explained, "It seems to me that we should just get Nagi to come live with us at the Koneko and stop being a member of Schwarz and the whole thing. I mean, as long as *I'm* the one cooking he'd certainly not go hungry anymore, and Omi's there so he wouldn't be lonely and sad all the time. I mean, it seems so obvious, why didn't anyone suggest it to him?"
The former soccer player's practical, down-to-earth wisdom couldn't be disputed and the fact that it was now painfully clear that the three eldest members of Weiss all felt the same way probably should've made the matter no longer one of contention, however life is rarely that simple.
Glad the topic had finally been broached, Yohji tried to find a way to respond that didn't make the topic one that might lead to a disagreement since the younger man needed to rest as he said, "It's not that simple, Ken-love." With a half-hearted smile he added, "I've been thinking the same thing over the last few days, but in all honesty, this is *his* decision, not ours. Um, his and *Omi's* I guess would be a better way to put it, though, come to think of it."
"All right," Ken agreed easily and asked, "So, why hasn't anyone asked both of them about it? I assume no one's mentioned it or he wouldn't be planning to go back to those idiots he lives with tomorrow."
No one in the room would dispute that the other Schwarz psychics certainly sounded like cruel individuals if they had allowed a boy who obviously understood far too little of fundamental nutrition to be providing for himself in that fashion almost single-handedly.
Then again, there was no way for the members of Weiss to even be aware of the fact that the members of Schwarz did indeed care for their teammate, they simply lacked the knowledge of the depths of his troubles. The other problem was a fundamental lack of understanding of proper parenting techniques that ought to have been involved since all of them had come from environments where such things as loving parents simply did not exist. The lack of proper medical care for Nagi was more a reflection of their lack of knowledge rather than a lack of concern, something that would unfortunately cause more pain as time passed, though.
In response to Ken's simple and direct question, Aya ran a hand through scarlet hair, disturbing one bright earlock as he paused to adjust his golden earring and he answered disappointedly, "There really hasn't been a good time to discuss something like that, Ken. Things have been quite tense these past four days as I'm sure you can imagine, but in all fairness, you're right." He threw a glance at their blond partner as if in apology as he stated, "We should've done that by now, Yohji. Or did you think otherwise?"
Amazed that Aya had apparently already been thinking along the same lines as himself and Ken as well, Yohji found a grateful smile growing on his face as he shook his head and admitted, "Not me, Aya. I've been thinking this very thing since the morning Nagi collapsed, actually." Sharing his smile with the tired man in the bed he explained, "If it was up to me alone, I'd see to it that Nagi was given a place with us in a heartbeat. Whether he'd become an active member of Weiss or not, is irrelevant, though. I'd just like to see him smile more and put on a little weight, he's too damned skinny!"
Nodding, Ken agreed, but his energy was dwindling and he didn't have time for a long discussion so he simply asked, "But you still haven't asked, Yohji. Why not if you think it's the right thing to do?"
Continuing to shake his head, annoyed that things were so complicated, the jade-eyed man admitted, "Because I still think this is something those two ought to come up with on their own, Ken-love. You know our Omiitchi, if he thinks we want something he'll do everything he can to achieve it, but if it means making Nagi miserable--I mean, I can't imagine he'd chose *them* over *us* but I guess it could happen--it'd probably tear the kid up." With one last firm shake of his head, the eldest member of Weiss stated flatly, "No, we need to wait and talk to Omi about it by himself first and see what he thinks before we accidentally put an emotional burden on his shoulders he can't handle."
Ken barely stifled a yawn and nodded sleepily after he saw an expression of full agreement in violet eyes and he agreed quietly, "All right, you win, loves. We'll wait and talk to Omi later, maybe it'll all turn out okay even if Nagi does go back there tomorrow after all." Unable to suppress the yawns any longer, he let one take control as his pain-filled body tried to tell him it was past the point of needing sleep.
Yohji had a thoughtful expression on his face as he remarked, "Come to think of it, maybe letting Nagi go back now after seeing what life was like hanging around with us for a few days might let the kid know how much better things can be for him if he moves?" He shrugged as Aya regarded him with veiled curiosity and he explained, "I mean, we kept making him eat and saw to it he got plenty of sleep and other stuff, too. Maybe when he doesn't get the same respect and consideration at home, he'll be more willing to listen later if we can convince Omiitchi to make the offer to come live at our place?"
"I'm not so sure about that," Aya asserted quietly, aware that Ken was drifting off to sleep yet not wanting to miss a chance to complete the invaluable discussion that could effect all of their lives in the most fundamental of fashions. With a scowl of annoyance, he explained, "It seemed to me Nagi was fully aware of their inability to care for him either physically or emotionally already yet he was still dead set on returning. I think there must be some other issues that hold him there, like the ones about past debts and possibly the fact that apparently Farfarello can't function without him around."
Snorting angrily, Yohji crossed both arms over his chest and stated flatly, "Well, don't expect *me* to invite that knife-licking lunatic to move into the Koneko, too, Fujimiya! You may be able to ignore the fact that we all carry various scars on our bodies thanks to his blades, but I can't! I may adore Nagi, but I am *not* letting the person who once said that *your* blood tasted 'sweet' come into our home!" The wire-wielding assassin was referring to the incident that had left the long, recently-healed scar on his violet-eyed lover's left calf and it was clear that it was an action that had not been either forgiven or forgotten by the jade-eyed man.
Aya looked peeved when the conversation took this unexpected turn and he remarked acidly, "That is *not* what I meant, Kudou! Don't be stupid!" After forcing some of his frustration regarding Nagi's return to Schwarz to fade, he added in less angry tones, "What I *meant* was that unless we understood what *really* kept him there we shouldn't expect to be able to convince him that he'd be better off with us, that's all."
Slightly mollified, the former detective agreed, "Yeah, I guess that's true, Aya. But I have no idea how to find *that* out." With a decision to let that subject drop, he turned towards the doctor who seemed to have been forgotten during the conversation and asked, "Norwegian? What else did you want to tell us about Nagi? Was the anemia *really* the worst thing you thought he might be facing?"
The Kritiker physician felt relieved that the pair had stopped arguing since he dreaded being witness to the two lovers who had only recently found their way back into a more balanced relationship coming to blows verbally. But at the same time he felt frustrated regarding the midnight blue-eyed teen who clearly ought to be a patient under a competent doctor's care somewhere yet most likely was not. There were so many things he suspected might be at the root of Nagi's problems, everything from simple neglect to complicated issues resulting from the emotional stress he faced which no fifteen year old should ever be expected to contend with to his extraordinary powers and so much more.
The portly man answered the question with a firm negative and an explanation. He had believed that the insufficient amount of iron in the boy's blood would be the easiest thing to treat and he felt that it would be best to offer an easy victory over one problem first since it might lead to an openness to face more difficult issues later. The idea that simply adding vitamins to Nagi's daily life might bring the telekinetic under unwanted scrutiny hadn't even occurred to him yet it had been the contention that purchasing more food could be rejected out of hand by the American psychic that still made him quite angry.
The eldest two members of Weiss agreed wholeheartedly, their own tolerance for Bradley Crawford had reached an end regarding anything of this sort, something that might or might not come into play at a critical point when it could cause a great deal of difficulty.
If Ken had been awake at the time, he might have made a practical suggestion like simply inviting Nagi to dine with them regularly or even to wonder aloud why Omi didn't take his boyfriend out to dinner more often. Unfortunately, these ideas were not answers that could actually work under the circumstances.
Without even hearing the previous discussion between the boys regarding Nagi's assumption that he would be under some form of house arrest for some time to come, they knew the sable-haired boy's comings and goings were apt to be more closely monitored now since that's what they would've done. Yohji, Aya, and Ken all knew that if Omi disappeared the way that Nagi had, they certainly would've turned Tokyo upside down looking for him. But if he had returned with a sincere wish for them to not question his absence and to trust him, they would have done so but would have also made sure he didn't vanish again in the future. They all loved the blond teen too much to let such a potentially dangerous situation repeat itself.
Without Ken to speak of them, however, these simplistic ideas would never reach the discussion phase and instead the three focused on overt observation techniques as well as plans to use Omi's legendary computer hacking skills to obtain whatever medical records he could pertaining to Nagi. Estet was easily as technologically advanced as Kritiker was and that alone might prove to be their downfall with regard to "Prodigy" at least. If Omi could be convinced that Nagi was being neglected by those who ought to be taking the best care of him, perhaps the cerulean-eyed teen would indeed endorse a plan to bring his boyfriend to the Koneko to stay for good.
As Norwegian was about to open a discussion regarding an even deeper worry that perhaps Nagi ought to be seen by a mental health professional that dealt with young people under unreasonable amounts of stress, someone that had been absent from Ken's room for over an hour returned.
The new arrival, sadly, would bring with him an entirely unexpected source of pain and sorrow that the men of Weiss would eventually be forced to face fully. But since what they were about to encounter would be horrific enough by the time the initial disclosure had been dealt with, they would be even more ill-equipped to cope when a buried secret was revealed much later.
*****
To be continued.
Full Author's Notes to Run at Conclusion.
Please be advised: Parts 44 & 45 will be posted together.
This evening's posting run is dedicated to all of my readers with deep respect and profound thanks for being understanding about the following unanticipated angst regarding getting this monster-sized fic completed!
{unhappily tries to get out the Horn of Friendship, decides said celebratory instrument is too heavy figuratively *and* literally tonight, and settles on the Harmonica of Despondency since it's lighter and fits the mood better. After playing a couple of "Harry Connick Jr.-style jailhouse blues" pieces, he seems to perk up a bit and goes ahead and explains}
Sadly, just so you'll know from the very start, I already know that I can't be sure of getting much done on the story or even reliably promise to be able to post on a nightly basis this week due to two things.
First, I'm headed back to the horror and pain of the dentist office tomorrow where they will try again to install that crown I need that had been improperly manufactured the first time and simply tore my mouth up when it wouldn't fit. Ah, there's no pain like dental pain, ne? Then again, since a migraine attack leveled me two nights ago and I'm still taking ibuprofen for the after-effects, this ought to be not so great a load to bear but one never knows, does one?
Second, part of the reason I was away from the sorrows and joys of "Cold November Rain" longer than anticipated last week is that my lovely eldest chibi, Amanda, has her first ever dance concert this Saturday night, March 30th!
{cheers up a little more, he's a proud papa about this one and even though it's set the fic writing and posting schedule back, he wants to tell the world how proud he is of his little girl!}
For a freshman at her admittedly huge high school, it's a big honor to be given a solo in the annual show which features the best their dance department has to offer, but at the same time it's meant a fairly large investment in money and time from me. There was a small fortune invested in her clothes, shoes, and costumes but that seems like nothing compared to the hours and hours of extra rehearsal she's had to put in on weekends and after school all this month. Since there's no classes scheduled for this Friday, she'll be in rehearsal all day then plus more on Saturday afternoon and early evening as they reset the auditorium's lighting at the last minute, too. Then there's the obligatory pre-performance early arrival for make-up, etc, and by the time it's all over I wouldn't be surprised to find myself needing to pick her up at 1am Easter Sunday somewhere from a cast party. All in all, this is a major ego boost for her and I wouldn't want her to miss a minute of it, but for myself as well as her understandably bored and neglected-feeling little sister, it's a pain in the butt.
{sets this aside and sits, chin in hand as he glares at a calendar and a copy of his latest posting run plans for CNR and sees that they do *not* agree in any way shape or form! tossing the plans out the proverbial window, he decides to fess up and just lay it on the line for you to make your own decisions}
As of right now, my best chances to post more are probably Tuesday and Thursday nights and if I can meet those self-imposed deadlines, you'll be getting Parts 46 & 47 in a couple of days--after *massive* editing in both!--and Parts 48 & 49 a couple of days after that. The main problems with this being that 48 isn't even complete since I loathe, hate, and despise what Melpomene did to Yohji in that scene and it needs to be ripped apart almost entirely and redone *and* it presupposes that the dentist and dance shit doesn't kill me. Worse, since the manuscript is currently midway through Part 51 and seems to be leaning towards needing at least three or even four more Parts after that, I could tear what little hair I have left out of my head in frustration since I *really* wanted this done before April Fool's Day!
{stalks around, wonders if he can buy "free time" on eBay or not, then flops down and finishes this note so the fic can be sent to the MLs and uploaded at fanfiction.net before too awfully much longer tonight}
Anyway, while I have no intentions of setting this fic aside eternally unfinished, I also won't waste what little energy I have available for such things as feeling guilty if this comes out on a weird schedule as it gets finished up. For those of you reading it at fanfiction.net, there will be a date notation added to the summary to indicate in a more high profile manner which day new Parts were added in the hopes that this makes life a little easier despite the schedule being uncertain. Look for "[more 03/25]" in today's "Just In" listing under "Weiss Kreuz: New Chapters" and then watch it to say "[more 03/27]" or whatever when the next set of Parts is added. It might not be in a nightly rhythm, but at least this way you get what I have as soon as it is deemed good enough to share, ne?
{feels better about explaining all of this and then goes off to get a little sleep before facing the evils of the dentist's office, a good angsty place to think of new ways to torture Yohji if nothing else!}
Thanks again for being supportive and I appreciate that so many of you are still following this Angst Epic despite the sheer overwhelming length and depth of the beast as well as the untimely interruptions that keep cropping up around here.
Look for an interesting new development regarding my updates ML to be posted as soon as I get a new update ready for it this week. I'm busy re-envisioning how that infrequently used list can be put to better use by the readers of the "Redirecting Destiny" continuity as well as *all* of my fanfiction works that I think you might enjoy being a part of! If you're curious to see the first Update of 2002 and aren't already part of the ML, please feel free to sign up by sending a note to EnigmaFanficUpdates-subscribe@yahoogroups.com! There's stuff on there about *all* of the fandoms I'm writing for, but since in the past there was only one new update sent roughly every 2 months, please don't be afraid of being snowed by new posts since it's not a fic list per se.
Either way, it was nice to be able to hang out with you for awhile again and share my angst-laden world of florist/assassins and their friends with you. Have a great week and with a modicum of luck I'll be back with the answers to more of those intermission teaser questions really soon!
Ja ne!
~~~E-sama the Llama~~~
(who was amazed when he went to get ready to upload this at fanfiction.net tonight and saw that we've hit the magic ***300*** reviews already and are still going strong! congrats to the amazing Weisshund, Mr. Peabody, for being the self-proclaimed Tricentennial Man who asked a curious question to which the answer is: "Who knows? I believe that they will find their *own* truly painful 'naked truths' in 'Scars' but perhaps you meant that they ought to wait and see what shows up new for the world of Trigun at ff.net like everyone else, ne?" {winks at Mr. P and vanishes})
~+~+~+~+~ As a courtesy to my fanfiction.net friends, I'm re-posting the list of questions from the intermission teaser that was deleted when Part 44 was uploaded. Feel free to follow along as we go and check them off as they are answered, or ignore them completely and be shocked and amazed when the answers unveil themselves in their own sweet time! ~+~+~+~+~
[1] What happens when Norwegian finally gets the chance to talk to Nagi about his health and why does it cause Aya to suddenly want to locate Bradley Crawford and slam him against a wall?
[2] What side-effects does Ken suffer from the use of KNT-0201 and will the Kritiker Research Labs drug help his spine to heal as promised?
[3] How will Omi say "good-bye" to the one he loves before Nagi goes back home after being AWOL for four days? Special note: This will *not* go lemony within the body of this story due to a lack of sex throughout as per the original envisioning of the tale, yet side-stories *are* possible after the fact, so don't expect explicit sexuality regardless of the cerulean-eyed teen's decision, all right?
[4] Will Ken's only remaining and severely injured kidney regain function or will he join the ranks of the thousands of those awaiting a kidney donor without knowing if one will be found before it's too late?
[5] Why does Yohji know who "Monique" is and why does her situation disturb him so badly?
[6] What will it take for Ken to convince Norwegian to release him from Tokyo General Hospital when there is precious little left that anyone there can do for him?
[7] Will Aya come to his senses and finally tell Yohji those special words of love that they both need to have him say or will he continue to argue with his elder lover and possible ruin their chances for the closeness he now shares with Ken?
[8] Where has the usually calm, sophisticated, and unflappable Korat been and why does he arrive so upset and out-of-character?
[9] How will Omi and Nagi cope with the fact that the younger of the two might be incommunicado once he returns to the Schwarz penthouse? Without even as little as email to stay in touch, can the pair of blue-eyed teens stay strong?
[10] Last but not least, will a certain sadistic orange-haired bastard show up again to ruin anyone else's life before this story ends or are we free of Calico's unique brand of evil for at least a little while?
Posted 25 March 2002 ~3:45am