Warning: I do not like to be plagiarized nor do I enjoy being sued. This is merely a parody of the classic Cinderella fairytale! Several characters belong to MIB The Animated Series, several more belong to me, the rest are the creations of other fanfic writers like Delia and Chanda. Thanks!
Elle's Fairytale
Once Upon A Time…
It wasn't your everyday peaceful kingdom, no, this was New York. A land ruled by a fair and just (all be it temperamental) King Zed and his JeeDangian Queen Zoey. Here aliens and humans dwelt together in what was sometimes the exact opposite of harmony…chaos.
But it was in an aging little mansion on the edge of this unusual kingdom where a beautiful and determined maiden lived, her name was Cinderella. She dreamed of becoming a member of the castle's elite law enforcement staff. Cinderella knew that she could be a top notch royal agent, if only given the chance. One minor obstacle stood in her way though…
"CINDERELLA!" a shrill and cold voice called from downstairs.
Cinderella sighed and left the window in her attic room to find out what her evil stepmother, P (short for Pamela), wanted now. "Yes P?" (She always called her stepmother by her nickname.)
"Where's my breakfast?! And have you finished that laundry yet?!"
"No P, it's drying, and your breakfast is on it's way," Cinderella replied listlessly, she was sick and tired of being treated like a slave in her own home.
"CINDERELLA!" V called, "I need you to come and iron my dress!"
"CINDERELLA!" F shouted, "get in here and make my bed!"
Cinderella sighed again, she'd never be able to get a moments peace living with her miserable stepsisters and her wicked stepmother. "I'm going out to empty the trash!" she told them as she laid her stepmother's breakfast out on the table and hurried outside.
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"Aww, what's the matter Elle?" one of the odd looking mice asked her (they referred to Cinderella as Elle for short).
"Oh Ziggy! I feel so trapped here!" Cinderella, uh-Elle, cried. "Those hags inside are never gonna learn to do their own chores so I'm going to be stuck here forever as a maid instead of as a royal MIB agent for the king!"
"We're sorry," another odd mouse said as he came out of the kitchen, "coffee?"
Elle shook her head. "If only I had a chance to become an MIB agent, I'd take it and leave this whole miserable place behind me!"
"Why don't you just get married?" one of the mice asked as he took a sip of his coffee.
"Married?" Elle scoffed, "Look at me, I'm a maiden in rags! Who'd want to marry me?"
"She's got a point," one of the four mice whispered to the other.
"Gee thanks…" Elle muttered.
Before they could continue their conversation a horn blew and someone from down the lane shouted, "Make way for the Duke! His royal Highness Zed has decreed that Duke Kay deliver this royal invitation!"
Elle strolled up to the carriage and greeted the two men, "Duke Kay? The royal MIB agent??"
"Yes ma'am," the driver, Agent U replied.
"Are you a resident of this household ma'am?" Kay asked.
"What do you think?" Elle asked sarcastically as she held up the trash bag.
Kay took that as a 'yes'. "King Zed has decreed that every eligible maiden attend a ball which will be held in honor of the return of his son, Prince X, tomorrow night. The Prince is expected to choose a bride at the ball---"
"At least that's what his mother wants him to do…"U chuckled to himself.
Kay shot him a look and U grew silent again. "---the lucky maiden will not only become a member of the royal family , but she will also have the honor of becoming one of the elite MIB agents of King Zed."
Elle couldn't believe what she was hearing. "Really? This isn't some kind of joke is it?"
"No ma'am, we members of the MIB do not have a sense of humor that we're aware of."
"Oh," Elle took the invitation Kay handed to her and the carriage pulled away.
She glanced down at the invitation, it was a small white business card with the bold letters MIB on the front and an address on the back. Odd.
She spun around and rushed back inside to tell her stepmother and stepsisters the exciting news!
"So what kept you from your chores Cinderella?" her stepsister, Agent V inquired. She was really just being sarcastic.
"The Duke just arrived with an invitation to a ball at the palace." Elle explained.
"An invitation!!!" all three woman exclaimed simultaneously.
Elle jumped back and stammered, "Yes."
"Do you hear that girls!" P asked her two daughters, "You're going to the ball and you're gonna get to dance with the Prince!"
"Um," Elle nervously began, "can I go?"
P paused and turned around, eyeing Elle suspiciously, "And why would you want to go to the ball?"
"Because the maiden chosen by the Prince gets to become a royal MIB field agent, and maybe if I go, the Prince or someone there might be able to put in a good word for me."
"So you're not even interested in the Prince?" F asked.
"Not really," Elle replied, she'd never even seen the guy anyways.
"But the maiden he marries gets to become a PRINCESS!" V exclaimed.
"That's not all that important to me." Elle explained.
"Alright Cinderella," P stated calmly, "if you finish ALL your chores by sunset tomorrow, you may go to the ball."
"Really?!"
"Yes."
"Oh thank you P! You won't regret this!"
Elle turned and hurried off to complete her chores. V and F stared at their mother in shock. "MOTHER!!!'
"She'll never finish all her chores in time, and even if she does…she'll NEVER set foot in that ballroom!" P replied darkly and started to laugh.
V and F turned towards each other and laughed too. They'd fix Cinderella's wagon this time. That hopeful blonde was gonna get the spunk knocked right out of her!
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At the palace things were not exactly picturesque either. Prince X was furious with his parents for arranging the ball behind his back and then expecting him to pick some strange female that showed up to marry!
"Mother! I told you! I don't want to get married!" X shouted. "I've already looked for a bride and there's no one out there for me!"
"Oh nonsense!" his mother, Queen Zoey, retorted. "There's someone out there for everyone, just look at your cousin Prince R, he's already engaged to be married to that charming girl, the Duchess Delia."
"Well that's his stupid mistake." X murmured. He still couldn't believe that of all the species in the universe, R had fallen in love with a hideous HUMAN!
"What was that Agent X?" his father (and boss), King Zed demanded.
"Nothing." X replied. "I just don't think that I'm gonna meet the right girl at this ball. You can't force me to get married!"
"Actually Agent X, that's entirely possible," the royal advisor, Dr. Zeeltor said cheerfully as he entered the room with his assistant Dr. Yazmine.
"Really?" the Queen inquired. This earned her an angry look from her annoyed son.
"Yes," Agent U stated as he cleared his throat and took out his regulation scroll. "Rule 582 Section B under royal weddings, 'The King and Queen may require their heir to choose a husband/wife once that heir is of the age of 21.'"
"Wow," Agent W said as she entered the throne room, "That DEFINITELY applies to Prince X. He's well over--"
"Thank you for pointing that out Agent W!" X interrupted.
"See son," King Zed pointed out, "you're the heir to this entire kingdom and we have to ensure that if anything happens to either of us or you that the monarchy won't collapse. Or else the MIB will fall apart too."
"Fine." Agent X mumbled. "But I get until midnight to pick a bride!"
"Deal," the King agreed.
"Oh this is so exciting!" the Queen said gleefully, "Our little boy is getting married!"
X groaned and rolled his eyes. He had about 24 hours (out of the 37 hour day) until his life was over!
___________________________________________________________________________
Elle woke up early the next morning and continued with her chores. There was a lot to but she wasn't going to let that stand in the way of her getting her dream job. She now had to help her two evil stepsisters with their ball gowns and style their hair before she could worry about obtaining a dress of her own.
"Whoa," one of the mice stated, "she's never gonna have time to find a dress to ware."
"And her hair's a mess." Ziggy stated.
"Maybe we should help her out?"
All four mice then looked at each other, "Nah!!!"
"What do we know about human wardrobe?"
"Zilch!"
"Nothing!"
"She's doomed!"
Elle was worn out by sunset but she had finished all of her chores. Now for a dress, that could be tricky. She hurried up to her room, ignoring her aching knees, 'that aspirin should be kicking in any minute now.'
Elle opened her closet door and found only outfits even more ragged than the ugly brown one that she had on. The cleanest part of which was her dingy apron.
Elle sighed and looked into the cracked mirror, now who would want to hire her when she looked like this?!
Downstairs her wicked stepmother called, "CINDERELLA?! Why aren't you down here with your stepsisters awaiting our carriage?"
The poor woman slugged down the attic steps, "Because I'm not going." She fought back the tears as she turned and fled up to her room.
P grinned sinisterly and said to her daughters, both clad in expensive garments with the trendiest new hairstyles. "See girls, I told you that breaking Cinderella's spirit would be remarkably easy."
"Guess that means that she won't be getting her dream job…" F chuckled.
"Or marrying the Prince!" V added.
"Come along girls," P said with an evil grin, "the Prince is waiting for you."
Elle watched from the attic window as the carriage stopped in front of the mansion and whisked her two stepsisters and stepmother away to the ball. Tears streamed down her face and she could barely see the blurred image of the stars flickering in the night sky. Finally, she cried herself to sleep.
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A faint knocking at the door awoke Cinderella several minutes later. She wiped the sleep from her eyes and rushed downstairs.
"I'm coming," she called without a trace of enthusiasm.
"Well hurry up girl, I ain't got all night!" a woman's voice called, in a semi-strong New York accent.
Elle unlatched the door and yanked it open, she was a little surprised by the sight that met her eyes. A tall beautiful woman with light brown skin and shimmering black wavy hair stood there clad in a golden silk pants suit.
"Who-who are you?" Elle stuttered.
"Why I'm your--" Just then there was a loud crash outside the door and a man shouted, "What a stupid place to stick a garbage can!"
"What was that?!" Elle asked.
"THAT…is my apprentice, Jay!" the woman answered. "And I'm your fairy godmother---Val."
"You seem awfully young to be my fairy godmother?"
"There's a shortage of older women due to the lousy retirement package, the Union's working on that. But since I didn't want to spend six years in law school, I figured that this gig is as classy as a girl like me is qualified for." Val explained half-heartedly.
"Oh," Elle replied, "well---you can come in if you want to. P, Vee, and F have gone off to the ball. So it's just me."
"Ack-hem," came four irritated little voices.
Elle sighed, "and the mice."
"Coffee?" the mice offered Val in unison.
"No time, I've gotta get Cinderella here to the ball!" Val exclaimed.
"Aww," the mice chorused.
Val frantically searched her person for something, "Now where did I put that---Jaaayy??"
She was answered by a loud zap that lit up half the yard. A dog began barking as Elle, Val, and the mice rushed over to see what had happened.
Val put her hands on her hips and stared down angrily at her apprentice…who had just transformed himself into a pineapple!
"Uh…little help here?!" Jay's muffled voice called from somewhere within the fruit.
"Oh, I don't know Jay. I think that's a pretty good look for you," Val smirked, "and how many times have I told you not to play around with MY WAND?!"
Elle snickered as Val reluctantly transformed her apprentice back into his human form. "Phew, thanks. For a minute there, I thought you were gonna leave me like that!"
"Darn conscience," Val muttered.
"Oh hey! You're here!" Jay said to Elle, "Looks like we got the right address this time!"
"Jay!" Val half-whispered/half-snapped. Then she turned to Elle, "Look Cinder-Baby, we've gotta concentrate on getting you to that ball. And no more interruptions!" she warned Jay, he stepped back and held up his hands.
"Now the first thing ya need is---" Val's voice trailed off as she glanced around the premises. 'Not a pumpkin in sight! Hmm…this could be tricky.' Oh well, she'd just improvise. "Ah-ha!" her eyes fell on a shiny black coffee can. "That ought to work!"
"I'm not following you…" Elle stated as she stared at the empty coffee can.
"Think classy transportation, it's sure to impress the agents, not to mention the Prince!" Val explained. With a wave of her wand the coffee can instantly morphed into a shiny black carriage.
"Ooo----nice!" one of the mice said as he walked around the carriage.
"But um…what's gonna pull it?" another inquired looking at the empty harnesses.
Val shot a menacing look at the four mice, "Hmm…that's a VERY GOOD question! Maybe you'd like to help? Horses-"
The mice quickly caught on to what the fairy godmother was planning. "Oh wait! NO! NO! NO! NO!"
But it was no use, Val had a schedule to keep and she wasn't going to get fired over some uncooperative mice. Within the blink of an eye they were all transformed into tan stallions. Too bad they still had whiney voices.
"Hey!" one shouted to the other, "How come YOU get to be in front?!"
"Cuz I'm a natural born leader, that's why!" the other replied proudly.
Val and Elle exchanged annoyed glances. "This is going to be a LONG night," Elle groaned.
"Now for a coachman," Val started looking around.
Jay heard this and eagerly began jumping up and down and waving his hands, "Me! Oh, pick me!!"
"Uh…" Elle moaned as a knot formed in her stomach.
Val nervously raised her wand and sighed, "I guess I don't have any choice." And with that she changed her apprentice's attire into that of a royal coachman's.
"Cool!" Jay exclaimed as he admired his new threads.
"And now for you girl." Val turned towards Elle and glanced down at her ragged clothes. "Ugh, looks like I've got my work cut out for me."
Elle struck an offended pose and glared at her fairy godmother. "Thanks."
"Just hold still," Val laughed as she waved her wand at Elle.
Elle's old garments sparkled with the glittering dust from the magic wand. Her rags were transformed into an elegant, long, black evening gown. Elle was awestruck!
"Now that ought to get you a man!" Val remarked.
Jay let out an approving whistle as he mounted the driver's seat.
"Thank you!" Elle gasped. "Now I'll land that job for sure!"
"And the Prince…" Val murmured as the carriage sped away.
___________________________________________________________________________
Music filled the palace as maiden after beautiful maiden arrived at the palace to meet and dance with the Prince.
X was ready to throw himself in front of one of those carriages just so that he could escape the nightmare. He glanced at the clock on the wall, '11:30 P.M.', he had one half-hour to choose a bride. Every girl there was so giddy and sweet that he felt nauseated by the sight of them.
"Next," U called as Kay went to get another maiden for X to dance with.
X groaned as V pranced over to him with a pearly white smile plastered on her face.
"Hello your Highness!" she chirped, "My name is V and I'd be delighted to be your bride."
Before X could say anything the music started again and V jerked him into the center of the room, "I just LOVE to dance!"
Kay fought back a grin and U snickered, "Now those two deserve each other!"
V spun X around and talked a mile a minute, he didn't think he'd ever be able to shut her up!
"And then I spent 4 years taking ballet, this was after the 3 years wasted on piano lessons, and I got to play the lead roll in the play in 8th grade! So I'm naturally talented and poised…"
The music stopped again, 5 long minutes later! "Finally!" X exclaimed.
"So? Do I get to be a princess?!" V inquired in an annoying perky tone.
"Uh--I'll get back to you on that." X lied.
"Next!" U laughed as Kay brought F over.
"A pleasure to meet you your Majesty," F curtsied. 'Now why did her sly tone give X all these chills?'
"Let's get this over with," he muttered as the orchestra played yet another song. 'This woman was definitely not someone that X wanted to spend his life with, she gave him the creeps!'
___________________________________________________________________________
Elle's carriage pulled up in front of the palace and Jay annouced, "Well, we're here!"
Elle struggled to pry her nails out of the upholstery. Jay drived lived like a madman! She managed NOT to strangle him as she staggered out of the carriage and up the steps to the enormous palace doors.
"Uh Agent Kay," W whispered after she had hustled over to U and Kay, out of breath.
"Yes?" Kay replied.
"I think you guys ought to see this!" she elbowed U as Elle approached the top of the tall, winding, ivory white staircase. The two agents looked up and gasped at the beautiful blonde maiden while she slowly descended the stairs.
X glanced up at the maiden too, not bad, for a human. Not bad at all. She was certainly the most attractive female there. Where was U anyways? He should be instructing Kay to lead the woman over to him.
The music had stopped, everyone was staring at her, Elle felt so strange. She suddenly found herself wishing that she had just stayed home. What was she thinking, coming here?!
Before Elle could decide to turn and leave, Kay took her arm in his and lead her over to a pointy-eared, green alien in lavender attire.
F was angrily lead away by U. Agent/Prince X took Elle's arm and stared into her beady blue eyes as the music started again, a nice, slow song.
X pulled Elle close and they began to dance, "Um…that's a nice dress." he mumbled, 'why was he feeling so timid all of the sudden?'
"Uh, thanks." Elle replied softly, 'who was this guy?!'
He wanted to start a conversation with this maiden, but he couldn't think of anything to say. "Uh…so what brings you to the palace?" X cringed, 'that had sounded SO STUPID!'
"I wanted to see about becoming a royal MIB agent." Elle explained.
"Really?" X decided to make the conversation about that, "I'm an MIB agent."
"Really??"
'Great, that seemed to spark her interest!' "Yep, Agent X."
'YES!! She'd finally gotten to talk to a real MIB agent! Maybe he'd help her get a job!' She paused, Agent X…Prince X?!
"Are you---Prince X?"
X laughed at the absurd question, of course he was the Prince. "Last time I checked."
Elle couldn't believe it! She was discussing becoming a MIB agent with the PRINCE!
"Oh, well it's nice to meet you." Elle couldn't think of anything else to say.
"Same here," he chuckled, this human was certainly amusing.
"So, have you found a bride yet?" Elle asked as she glanced around the ballroom, everyone was staring at them.
"Maybe-" X replied as he ran his clawed hand through Elle's short blonde hair. She either didn't notice or she just didn't mind.
Queen Zoey leaned over to her husband from her throne, "She seems like such a sweet girl, I wonder who she is?"
"Doesn't matter for now," King Zed grinned, "what's important is that he's FINALLY chosen a bride."
"Looks like we've got a winner," Kay said to U and W.
"Not a bad choice," W stated.
"I thought we'd be stuck here all night!" U added.
X and Elle danced closely and continued their small talk. "And I don't see why in the world I should even have to get married at all." X finished.
Elle sighed, he seemed really distraught over the whole matter, "Being a prince means you get stuck with a lot of responsibility. But I agree that you shouldn't be forced into marriage."
"Yeah…"X liked having someone around to talk to, even if it was a human. "You're a pretty good dancer, for a human." informed her.
"You're not a bad dancer yourself," Elle replied with a smile that she just couldn't suppress.
"Aww…" Agent Delia, the Duchess of New York, sighed, "looks like your cousin has finally fallen for someone."
"Yeah," Agent R, Prince of JeeDangia, answered, "and it looks like they're really hitting it off too!"
"So how do you like being one of the King's Royal MIB agents?" Elle asked as she rested her head on X's shoulder.
"It's not so bad, plenty of action. I get to bust bad guys, save the day, typical heroics. It's just that there are these hideous humans swarming all over the place…" X cut himself off abruptly, 'oops'.
"And what's wrong with humans?!" Elle demanded as she lifted her head up and crossed her arms.
"Uh, nothing--" X stammered, loosening his collar. "--well, you have to admit that your species has such little ears, pale pink skin, and those beady eyes---"
"In case you haven't noticed," Elle gritted through clinched teeth, "you're no 'Prince Charming' yourself! Huge pointy-ears, long green nose, and large multi-pupiled eyes!"
"Hey!" X got all defensive, "It's not MY FAULT that your species is so unbelievably UGLY!"
"You're such a jerk!" Elle cried, causing the music to come to a screeching halt.
"Uh-oh…" W murmured.
Val's voice rang out in Elle's head, "Aw geez girl, I forgot to warn you---the magic ends at midnight and then the whole spell's broken!"
"Great!" Elle said to herself, "I've never been more ready to leave in my life!"
X heard this and placed himself in front of Elle, "You can't go now! It's almost midnight!!"
"I KNOW!" Elle snapped, pushing him aside, "Now get out of my way!"
"Looks like we've got a little problem here," Kay stated to the two agents who each stood at his side.
"That had to be the shortest relationship in history!" U exclaimed.
X watched helplessly as the girl of his dreams fled up the stairs towards the exit. He panicked and shouted, "STOP HER!"
This made Elle run even faster, the clock began to strike midnight, ten more strokes and the spell would be broken!
X hurried outside with Kay, U, W, and about 15 other agents behind him. "Wait! Please! I don't even know your name!!" he called out to Elle.
She nearly tripped as one of her shining black shoes came off and rested at the base of the steps. X rushed over and grabbed for her arm, no use, she hurried over to the black carriage where the coachman (Jay) was reading a comic book.
"Whoa!" Jay shouted as he saw the procession of agents chasing Elle, he leapt into the driver's seat and took hold of the reins.
"Let's get out of here!!!!" the worms cried as the carriage pulled away with Elle inside.
"STOP!" Kay ordered, "Close the gates!"
The gatekeeper quickly obeyed but not before the carriage had narrowly slipped past.
"NO!!!" X screamed. The maiden was gone and he had no idea where to find her! He turned angrily to the agents, "How could you just let her get away?! You're supposed to be the best of the best of the BEST!!!"
"We are…" W replied, "when it comes to tracking, monitoring, and policing alien traffic on Earth."
"Found this," Kay stated as he held up Elle's black shoe, "maybe it could be used to find our missing maiden."
"You'd better hope so," X scoffed as he took the shoe. It was so tiny and slender, just like his gorgeous little human. He'd find her again…even if he had to search the ENTIRE KINGDOM!
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A dark figure loomed outside the gates, it was the nemesis of the MIB, the evil sorcerer---Alpha!
"So---" he began darkly, "the Prince has finally chosen a bride. Too bad that he doesn't know where she is! I suppose I shall just have to go and pay this mysterious maiden a surprise visit. She might prove useful in my plan to seize control of the MIB!" he laughed maniacally as the crowd of agents turned and went back inside the palace.
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The black carriage raced through the night and as the final strike ended…everything and everyone were instantly returned to the way they were BEFORE the spell had been cast.
"Aww man!" Jay grumbled, "back to being a second rate apprentice again!"
"Whoa, what a ride!" one of the horses--uh--mice said.
"That was cool!" another exclaimed.
"Anyone for coffee?" the lead mouse asked.
Then the mice and Jay grew quiet and looked over at Elle, she was back in her ragged clothes and leaning against a tree by the road. Tears streaked down her face as she stared back longingly at the palace. The Prince had seemed so crushed when she had left, she actually missed that annoying green alien! If only she could've stayed a little longer, she might've even been able to get her dream job!
As she started to cry again one of the mice called out, "Hey look! One of your shoes is still there!!!"
Elle glanced down and sure enough, there was her shiny black shoe. A memento, she guessed, so that she'd always have something to remember that night by.
"Gosh, it's getting late!" Jay yawned, "Well, it's been fun! But I gotta get going before Val hunts me down and ties my ears in a knot!"
Jay vanished before their eyes, 'Ears?', that reminded Elle of Prince X and his green, pointy ears. She sighed and began the long walk back to the mansion, with the mice trailing behind her.
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It was another bright morning in the Kingdom of New York, everyone was sleeping-in after the grand ball from the night before. Everyone except---the royal family and the MIB.
Queen Zoey looked at her son and sighed, he hadn't slept a wink all night. Surely he must be exhausted! But all he could think of was the blonde maiden that he had met at the ball. "Dear, perhaps you should rest now, your father has his best agents looking for her?"
"No Mother!" X moaned in a tired voice, "I can't sleep until I've found her! She's the one I want to marry, and I won't rest until she's back at the palace!"
The Queen started to protest when the King entered followed by Kay, Zeeltor, and Yazmine. Yazmine was carrying a small silk pillow with a light blue satin cloth covering the shoe.
"Aahhh, Prince X. I think that I might have the solution to your problem!" Zeeltor stated in a cheerful voice.
"What?!" X eagerly inquired.
"Well, I have good news and bad news…" he said as he motioned for Yazmine to step forward. "The good news is that this particular shoe was designed so that it will only fit the original owner! Thus, it should only be wearable by the mysterious maiden from last night. However, the bad news is that we can't identify the maiden unless we search every girl in the kingdom until we find the one that the shoe fits!"
King Zed sighed, "So son, you see our dilemma. Are you sure that she's the girl you want to marry?"
X got irritated by this and cried, "Of course I'm sure that SHE'S the girl I want to marry! I've searched the whole universe to find a girl like her and I'm not going to lose her now!"
"Well then," Zed decided, "that settles it. Agents Kay and U will go with you to search for this illusive maiden and once you've found her we will begin planning the wedding."
"Yes Sir," U saluted with a slight bow. Yazmine rolled her eyes and returned with Zeeltor to the royal lab.
"Oh I can't wait!" the Queen said happily to herself. Her little boy was finally getting married and the future of the MIB would be secured through another generation! Now all they needed…was the bride!
___________________________________________________________________________
Elle got up late the next morning, she hadn't slept in--she'd stared at the ceiling all night--she just hadn't felt like facing her usual pathetic life again (at least not right away).
"Time to face the music," she groaned to herself as she slipped out from underneath her cozy gray blanket.
She made her way down to the kitchen only to see her two wicked stepsisters and evil stepmother sitting at the table with irritated expressions on their faces.
"So---" Elle quietly began as she walked over to start breakfast, "how was the ball?"
"Awful," V muttered, "some blonde harlot showed up and hogged the Prince!"
"Well, I'm sure that he must've noticed that I was a superior dancer to her!" F announced vainly.
Elle grinned, 'Yeah right'. "Does anyone know who she was?"
"No," V answered, "she just appeared out of nowhere, and then, vanished!"
"If I ever get my hands on that little tramp I'll break her legs!" F added. "Let's see Ms. Dainty dance after that!"
Elle was about to go off on F and reveal herself when P looked up from the letter she was reading. "The Prince is to come by soon to have every eligible maiden in the household try on the black shoe!"
"What?!" all three girls chorused.
"And if the shoe fits then that maiden gets to marry the Prince, become the Princess, and a Royal MIB agent!" P continued. "The Prince should be here any minute! Girls, hurry and get ready!" P turned to Elle, "And you…go upstairs and stay in your room until he's gone. I don't want you to smudge the Prince's garments with your filthy apron!"
Elle started to protest but decided to ignore her stepmother until the Prince arrived, besides, she had to go upstairs and get the shoe out of her closet anyway. "Yes P."
P watch as Elle ascended the attic stairs. Once she'd entered the room P slammed the attic door shut and locked the deadbolt. "What?! Let me out!" Elle shrieked and pounded on the door.
P laughed and went back downstairs, they'd never hear Elle's cries from the first floor.
Elle slumped down on the floor and wiped the tears from her eyes, she wasn't going to give up THAT easily! Frantically she searched her room for something that she could use to brake down the door. Everything was either too heavy for her to lift or not strong enough to brake the door down.
"Hey, what're ya doing up here?" one of the mice asked as he squeezed through the crack at the far side of the room. "The Prince is gonna show up any minute!"
"I know," Elle sobbed, "but P locked me in!"
"Geez that's harsh," another mouse said as he came in through the crack followed by the other two mice.
"Wait a minute," Elle glanced down at the mice, "you can get in and out of here. So you can sneak downstairs and get the key!"
"Oooohhhh no!" the mice replied, stepping back towards the opening.
"You've got too guys, or else I'll never be able to get downstairs in time!" Elle pleaded.
"Aw but," they began but the carriage pulled up outside the window.
"Please!" Elle begged, "I'll buy you 20lbs. of gourmet coffee if you do this one thing for me!"
"20 lbs.!" they shouted, "you've got yourself a deal!"
Elle watched hopefully as they dashed back into the crack and then put her ear to the floor. If she was lucky then maybe she'd be able to hear what was going on downstairs.
___________________________________________________________________________
P rushed to answer the door, so before Agent U could knock--"Gentlemen! Welcome to our humble home!" P gestured grandly.
"Uh, thanks ma'am." U replied as he entered, carrying the pillow the shoe on it.
"Are their any eligible maidens present?" Kay inquired.
"Why yes," P moved aside revealing V and F. "Allow me to present my two lovely, ELIGIBLE daughters, V and F!"
"I'm sure you remember me your Highness," V giggled.
"Sure wish I didn't," X muttered under his breath. He was sure that the girl he was looking for wasn't here, but it was the last place that they hadn't searched.
"Enchanted," F curtsied and offered X her hand. He just stared at it, so she slowly brought it back down to her side.
The mice peered around the doorframe and saw the key dangling from a chain, on P's wrist!
"The things we do for primo java…" one mouse sighed.
"Let's get that key and go!" another whispered.
The mice skulked quietly over to P as U placed the shoe on V's foot. "It doesn't even go over the ankle," U grunted as he tried futilely to shove V's foot into the shoe.
"Well maybe her feet are a little swollen, from all the dancing last night." P suggested.
"Mother! This hurts!" she squealed.
"Next." Kay ordered.
F sat down and U tried to catch his breath. The mice crept up behind P.
"Oh you're just not trying hard enough!!!" F yelled. She pushed U aside and squeezed her foot into the shoe.
"It fits!" U exclaimed. The mouse grabbed the chain.
"IT DOES?!" P gasped and failed to notice the chain being slipped off her wrist.
"Got it!" the mouse informed the others. "Let's go!"
X was in shock, 'NO! This was the last human in the universe that he'd wanted to marry!'. "I-I can't believe it!" he stuttered.
"Believe it kid," Kay replied. "This is the maiden that you've been searching for."
"Oh no!" one of the mice screamed as they all hurried up the stairs, "We're too late!"
F's foot started to turn purple and she screeched, "OW! Get this thing off me!!! It's too tight! I can't stand it!!!"
The shoe was pried her foot by both U and Kay, "Uh, maybe it shrunk?" P laughed nervously.
"I don't think so." Kay said between heaves.
"Phew," X sighed, he almost got stuck with that witch!
"ELLE! ELLE!" the mice screamed from outside the attic door.
Elle turned and rushed over to the door, "Guys! They're leaving! Quick, unlock the door!"
"It's apparent that no one present is the maiden that we're searching for," Kay stated, "I don't suppose that there are any other maidens in the household?"
"Why no," P answered nervously, "besides where would we keep them, locked up in the attic?"
Kay cocked an eyebrow but turned to leave anyway. Just then…
"Wait!" a young woman's voice called, X froze and looked up, he knew that voice!
Everyone glanced up at Elle as she hurried down the staircase. "Your Grace, may I try the shoe on?"
"Of course," Kay replied as he motioned for U to hurry over with the shoe.
P tripped U as he dashed past her and he dropped the shoe, it rolled into the fireplace and was reduced to ashes before everyone's eyes.
X glared at P, "Oops," she grinned.
"Don't worry about it 'Prince Charming'," Elle laughed and reached behind her back, "because I have the shoe's mate!"
"NO!!" V and F gasped.
"And it looks like I've found my mate," X concluded as he placed the shoe on Elle's foot…a perfect fit!
Elle wrapped her arms around X and they kissed as V fainted and F collapsed into a chair.
"So…" U asked P, "are you aware of the penalty for LYING to royalty?!"
"I---uh, I…" P knew she was in hot water this time!
Elle felt a tug at her apron so she glanced down and saw the mice, "Where's that coffee you promised us?" they demanded.
Elle laughed and Kay led them out to the carriage with promises of gourmet coffee.
Everything seemed to be going their way until suddenly…
"Well, well, well…" Alpha mused as he leapt down from the treetops, "rushing off to be married and live happily ever after are we?"
"ALPHA!" Kay shouted and pulled out his sidearm.
Alpha lunged a tentacle forward and jerked Elle away from X and held her in front of him like a human shield. "I wouldn't try anything hasty, Agent Kay…" Alpha threatened as the tentacle wrapped tightly around Elle's throat, "or you'll have one maiden short a kingdom!"
"Let her go scum or I'll blast off all your limbs!" Kay ordered.
"I don't think so, I'm the one who has the upper hand!" Alpha laughed. He grabbed a small cylinder out of his pocket, which was somewhere in that mess of alien body parts, and threw it to the ground. A brilliant flash lit up the yard as gas gagged the agents. "My demand is simple Prince X! All I want in exchange for this maiden is YOU!" and with that Alpha disappeared into the gas.
"We've gotta find her!" X choked.
"Who said that?!" U asked as he stumbled into the street in search of fresh air.
Kay looked out onto the countryside, Zed was NOT going to be happy about this. Alpha had struck again, and this time, he'd gone TOO far!
___________________________________________________________________________
Elle grimaced in the light that poured down into the room where she was being held captive. "Wha-what's going on here?" she moaned.
"Ah, you're awake…" a calm voice replied from somewhere in the shadows. Elle noticed that she was tied to a wooden beam that was holding up what looked like it was a none too sturdy basement.
A rat scampered by and ran across her shoe, it was the only one she had on. "Who are you?!" Elle demanded as she recalled what had just befallen her.
"Why I beg your pardon my dear," the voice chuckled, "I'm known as Alpha and I'll be holding you hostage---at least until your precious Prince X gets here---then I'll destroy you both!"
"No!" Elle cried, "You wouldn't dare!! The MIB will bring you down Alpha, and you made the wrong move by tangling with Agent X!"
"Oh do forgive me for not cringing in fear," he sneered, "I've got plans for the MIB and you're going to be my ticket for overthrowing the monarchy and taking control of all the technology that they possess!"
"You won't get away with this!" Elle knew that that statement had been WAY overplayed…but she felt compelled to say SOMETHING.
"Is that another famous quote from the damsel-in-distress handbook?" he joked and then turned back to what he was doing…planning Prince X's demise.
___________________________________________________________________________
"NO!" X screamed as he stalked around the yard. He couldn't believe that she was gone…AGAIN!
"Hey! Keep it down!" a voice piped out as a Pug rushed out of its doghouse. "Some of us are trying to get some sleep!"
"He talks!" U exclaimed.
"That's because he's an alien," Kay explained. "This is Frank the Pug, he's taken up residence here to escape political persecution."
"The persecution I can handle," Frank said, "It's the EXECUTION that worries me!"
"Well then maybe you'll cooperate and tell us what you know about Alpha!" X snapped.
"Sure thing," Frank grinned, "for a price."
"Alright mutt, what's your angle?" X groaned. He just wanted to find Elle, get married, and get his mother off his back!
"I hear the cuisine at the palace is four stars!" Frank answered.
"Fine. All you can eat. NOW TALK!!!" X shouted.
"Word on the streets is that Alpha is shacked up in some underground storage building downtown."
"Where?!"
"That I don't know, but I know who might--"
"WHO?!"
"--there's this shop owner in the marketplace that deals in alien weapons, technology, and stuff…he's probably the one supplying Alpha."
"Uh…excuse me!" a woman's voice called from around the side of the house, "but exactly what is going on??"
X, Kay, Jay, U, and Frank turned and saw a woman in a gold pants suit with a wand glaring at them. Another man was standing behind her, reading a comic book.
"Who are you?" Kay asked.
"Where's Cinderella?" Val demanded.
"He asked you first," Jay pointed out.
"Fine. My name's Val and I'm Cinderella's fairy godmother. No cracks about my age okay, this is the only job a girl like me could get!"
"Do you know how we can find her?" Kay inquired skeptically.
"Depends," Val snapped, "who are you?!"
X was tired of all this, "I'm Prince X, these are MIB agents. Now can you track her down or not?"
"Ah, Prince X." Val sighed, "well, I'd love to track her down for you, but magic only goes so far."
"Then you can't do a thing?" U asked.
"Well," Val thought for a moment, "I can use a spell that will allow me to sense when we're getting closer to Elle. What happened anyway? One minute I'm here to check up on the girl and the next, I'm talking magic to you guys!"
"Elle?" Frank muttered.
"Her nickname," Val explained.
"She--Elle--was kidnapped." Kay informed her.
"Then let's go get her back." Val turned and grabbed Jay by his collar. "Hey?!" he shouted, "Where are we going?!"
Val groaned and pointed to the royal carriage. "You heard the dog, that shop owner is our best place to start looking for Elle." she tossed an expectant look at the other men, "Well? Are you coming or not?!"
Kay and X rode with Val inside the carriage, Jay sat next to U in the coachman's seat. "Nice ride," Jay scoffed, "we'll never make it there in time in this decked out centerpiece on wheels!"
"Oh won't we?" U sneered as he reached down and pressed a red button below the seat.
"Hey. What's that thing dooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!" suddenly the carriage was covered by shiny black armor and raced off, at lightening fast speed towards the marketplace.
___________________________________________________________________________
"Ah, it's ready." Alpha chuckled as he turned towards his prisoner and held the metallic device where she could see.
"What is that thing?" Elle couldn't make out what the strange invention was, but the strange shimmering substance inside the chamber on the side made her stomach churn.
"Why my dear CAPTIVE guest, this is a brilliant fusion of magic and science!" Alpha explained. "This elixir in the center will act like a very powerful acid and eat away at your beloved Prince!"
Elle's eyes widened at that. 'He wouldn't! He couldn't!'
"Not so spirited now, are we?" he laughed. "Of course once the dear heir to the throne and the Royal MIB is destroyed, the organization will crumble along with this pathetic kingdom! I'll move in and gain control of both! With all the technology and power that I'll possess, NO ONE WILL OPPOSE ME!"
"You're crazy!" Elle screamed, "It'll take more than you to bring down the MIB!"
"That's the best part!" Alpha grinned, "King Zed will be so eager to get his son back that he'll put his best agents on the job, I'll wipe them all out at once! And it's all possible because of you!"
"NO!" Elle couldn't believe this was happening, how could life be so cruel?
"You might as well resign yourself to your fate my dear. I'm not planning to spare you, you'll be the very next victim of my device just as soon as Prince X is but a devoured memory! Looks like you want be getting that fairytale ending after all!" he chuckled maniacally as Elle's head sank to her chest, 'What was she going to do? Prince X, the Royal MIB, and the kingdom were all doomed, and it was all her fault!' She regretted ever going to that stupid ball!
___________________________________________________________________________
The marketplace bustled with shoppers and merchants from all over the universe. It was so crowded that the agents (and fairies) could barely see where they were going. They had had to take things on foot once they got to the center of town and things definitely didn't look like they were going to get any easier.
"Hey! There he is!" Jay exclaimed as he spotted Jeeb's shop through the crowd.
"Good work kid," Kay said as he lead the way to the shop.
"Really? Thanks!"
"Oh no," Val sighed, "he's about to go off on one of his macho trips again!"
They entered the shop and were greeted by a voice similar to the one used by a typical used carriage salesman.
"Hello friends and how may I help you today?" the owner paused and looked at Kay. "KAY! What are you doing here?!"
"Here you got some hot tips on where our friend Alpha might be hiding Jeebs." Kay explained, "Word is that you're even the one supplying him with the technology!"
"Hey Kay, you know I don't know nothing'." Jeebs lied.
X was furious, he stalked over to the shop owner and clamped a hand around his throat, "Look you sorry, pathetic, piece of space trash! You either tell us where to find Alpha or I'm gonna wring you scrawny neck!!!"
"Ok…OK!_ Jeebs choked, "This is just a rumor mind you, but I heard that he's hiding in one of the old caved in storage buildings down on 52nd Street."
"WHICH ONE?!"
"I-I don't which one. Ya think he'd tell me?" Jeebs stuttered.
"Let him go X," Kay said flatly, "he's gotta be in the second one, it's the only one with it's lower, basement level still intact."
"Fine." X released Jeebs from his grip and Jeebs crashed to the floor.
"This is alien mistreatment!" Jeebs complained, "I'm an honest working guy, so what if I'm a little unethical every so often, everybody is!"
"But you've just violated at least SIX alien agreement guidelines on the immigration contract that you signed!" U pointed out.
Jeebs tugged at his collar for a second and then forced a laugh, "Well I suppose that I could overlook this whole matter, that is, if you guys are willing to do the same."
"Of course Jeebs," X grinned, "We'll just need ALL your stolen merchandise to be turned over to U here within the hour."
Jeebs looked like he was about to object but Kay cut him off, "Do it Jeebs, or we'll deport you on the next flight out!"
The agents left, all except U, he was awaiting backup while Jeebs reluctantly loaded him up with alien technology and faulty passports.
___________________________________________________________________________
A few minutes later, the agents were back at the palace (in the HQ area).
"Well Kay, what'd you find out?" King Zed inquired.
"Alpha's in one of the condemned storage buildings, the one with the intact basement." Kay replied.
"Great," Zed grumbled, Alpha was sure to have a trap laid for them, "I'm putting our best agents on the job."
"Understood Sir," Kay agreed, "but who's available to help out?"
"Well there's the Duchess of Celestia," Zed answered as he flipped through his notes, Kay blushed, 'Aileen'. "She just arrived this morning, and I hear that you've already gotten some 'magical assistance'?"
"That's right," Kay glanced over Zed's shoulder and saw Aileen approaching.
"Hi Kay," Aileen (the Duchess of Celestia) smiled, "long time, no see."
"Feels like an eternity," Kay almost whispered as he gazed at her.
Aileen laughed, "Ever the charmer, ay Kay?"
A moment later the agents were all back in the carriage, all except Kay and Aileen. They had taken Kay's personal carriage, the LTD model.
Kay filled Aileen in as to what was going on as he tugged at the reins. Jay was struggling to keep the other carriage from running over anybody as he swerved in the streets. Val wished she had a blindfold and W and U (who had finished confiscating all the stolen merchandise from Jeebs) were being tossed around in the second seat within the carriage.
"They should install seatbelts in this thing!" U complained. W was slung into his lap and wrapped her arms around him to keep from being thrown into the floorboard. 'Then again…' he thought.
___________________________________________________________________________
Inside the basement of the storage building Alpha stared at the monitoring screen in front of him. 'Excellent, those incompetent fools were doing exactly as he'd planned.'
"Oh no," Elle gasped softly to herself. "They don't realize what kind of trap they're getting themselves into!"
Outside the first carriage came to screeching halt, "Phew," Jay sighed, "see, that wasn't so bad?"
Val staggered out of the carriage and felt something tug within her, 'Elle?'. "She's down there." Val pointed to the rubble.
"And how are we supposed to get to her?" Jay asked, staring at all the splintered wood and concrete slabs.
Val walked over to the center of the mess and tugged at a large piece of wood, when it didn't budge she slipped her fingers under the crack in the bottom and yanked upward with all her might. The wood was slung into the air revealing an entrance to the basement and some stone steps.
"That was easy," Val remarked as she dusted her hands off.
Kay and U were too astonished to say anything.
"Hmm," X muttered, "maybe your entire species isn't just a weak bunch of beady eyed freaks."
"Uh, thanks." Val replied as X pushed past her and enter the opening, "Oh he's charming." she added with a sneer.
Downstairs everything was bleak and quiet, Elle was still bound to the wooden beam but now she had been gagged as well.
X was the first one to see her, "Elle!" he cried and started to rush over to her. Kay quickly reached out and caught X by the shoulder.
"Wait a minute," he warned, "this is probably a trap."
Elle forced herself to look up at X, once she spotted him she jerked frantically against the ropes and started screaming something inaudible to him.
"What?" Val couldn't understand a thing, what she was saying was just too muffled, "Hold on." she raised her hand and placed it between herself and Elle, instantly the rag in her mouth vanished.
"IT'S A TRAP!" she gasped, "ALPHA'S GOING TO SHOOT YOU X, YOU'VE GOTTA GET OUT OF HERE!"
"Not without you!" he yelled back.
"Then I guess you won't be leaving now will you?" Alpha chuckled as he emerged from behind the beam.
"ALPHA!" Kay shouted and drew his weapon. It looked suspiciously like a flame thrower but the tip of the lit arrow looked…green?
"Ah, ah, ah…" Alpha grinned, "try anything and the girl dies."
X felt completely helpless, stand still---get blasted, make a move---lose Elle!
Elle struggled against the ropes while Alpha powered up the horrid device.
Val saw this and squinted her eyes as she focused on the ropes. Elle suddenly felt the rope snap behind her, where Alpha couldn't see!
She slowly pulled her hands out and held the rope in place by leaning against it. Val smiled and in her mind, singled Jay to distract Alpha.
Jay got the picture and burst out, "So what's that cruddy little thing supposed to do anyway? Looks like a giant nightlight to me!"
Kay and Aileen looked at Jay like he had lost his mind, "What are doing?" Aileen whispered. Jay just winked at her.
"Why don't I show you?" Alpha replied and turned to where Elle should be. "What the---?"
Elle had slipped out and crept behind the maniac, behind some crates she waited for the appropriate moment to spring out and grab the device.
U and W exchanged looks and began taunting the madman. "Way to go Alpha, go and lose the hostage in less the 5 minutes into your big speech!" W laughed.
"And you wonder why you've never been able to defeat the Royal MIBs before!" U added.
Alpha turned to the agents and shouted, "Well I don't need that troublemaker anyway!" he glared at X, "All I really need, is to destroy you!" He took aim and was ready to fire.
Right on cue, Elle jumped out and grabbed hold of the weapon. As she and Alpha struggled for control of it, Kay aimed HIS weapon at Alpha and fired.
Alpha screamed in pain as the glowing arrow pierced his side. Elle managed to jerk the weapon away and X rushed over to grab her before Alpha could retaliate.
"You miserable little wench!" he shouted at Elle, "You've ruined everything!" he made a move to jerk her out of X's arms and then decided to pick them BOTH up and hurl them across the room.
The device fell to the ground and Jay spotted it.
Alpha advanced on the two dazed victims with his stinger raised as Jay held up the device. "Man I hope this works!" he muttered as he pulled the trigger.
The basement lit up with a grayish light and Alpha shrieked in pain as the elixir ate away at his body, and all it's alien attachments.
"Nice shot Slick." Kay remarked as Aileen clutched onto his jacket.
X shielded Elle while Alpha collapsed in pain, more dead than alive, and the last of his body was devoured.
"Guess that'll teach him not to mess with magic." Val grinned.
X looked at Elle once Alpha was no more and smiled, "Let's go home."
"Sorry about getting you into all this," Elle sighed.
"Are you kidding," X laughed, "This is just another day in the life of an MIB agent."
Elle smiled and wrapped her arms around him, "Still, thanks for coming to my rescue, Prince Charming."
X chuckled and helped Elle to her feet, on their way back to the carriage he stopped and pulled her in front of him, "Elle?"
"Yes?"
"I never really had the chance to ask you this outright before…" he stammered.
Elle smiled at him as he knelt down on one knee, "And what would that be?"
"Well," he gulped, "um…I was wondering," 'deep breath'. "Elle, will you marry me? And become an MIB agent and a princess and all." he added with a nervous laugh.
Elle stood silent for a moment before kneeling down and replying, "Yes. Of course I will X. You're a little conceited but that kinda works for me." she kissed him on the cheek.
X paused for a moment and stared back at her, "You're not exactly the easiest person to be around yourself." He laughed and Elle smiled at him, 'So this was love, what were they getting themselves into?'
They leaned forward and kissed, mainly because they were both too worn out to fight.
"Can we go yet?" Jay whined. He had enough mush for one day.
"Fine," Val chuckled, "But you are NOT driving!"
___________________________________________________________________________
A Fairytale Ending
Church bells rang and doves filled the air. It was a real fairytale wedding alright.
Kay and Aileen sat in the front row next to King Zed and Queen Zoey, who was crying and overjoyed about her little boy's wedding.
The ceremony was spectacular, and nearly the entire kingdom had shown up. Even Jeebs and Frank had made it, they both looked really awkward in their tuxedoes. Jay was the best man, surprisingly, and Val was the maid of honor, which was a little less surprising. Delia and R held hands and watched the vows being made, soon they would be the ones at the alter.
The ceremony ended and everyone was present afterwards for the cutting of the cake (which was several layers high).
"Coffee!" the mice chorused.
Zeeltor and Yazmine served punch to the guests while the mice attacked the coffee maker.
U and W sat and chatted with R and Delia while Queen Zoey bothered the caterers, insisting that they bring in more food for the guests. She even considered tying on an apron and doing everything herself.
Jay and Val were watching the scene when Kay and Aileen joined them. "Pretty impressive work back at the storage building." Kay told Jay.
"You were pretty impressive too," Aileen informed Val, "I mean, it was amazing the way that you cleared the entrance. You must work out."
Val laughed and Jay was soaking up all the compliments. "So how would you two like to become MIB agents yourselves?" Kay asked.
"Really?" they gasped simultaneously.
"We're always looking for a few good men, and women." Kay replied with his arm around Aileen.
"Sure, I mean thanks." Val stammered.
"Alright! No more bossy superiors!" Jay exclaimed, earning him a look from Val.
Kay and Aileen laughed. They then turned to see King Zed begging Queen Zoey to stop harassing the caterers. This made them all laugh.
X and Elle danced in the center of the room. They were staring into each other's eyes and swaying to the soft music.
"Looks like everything worked out okay," X smiled.
"Everyone seems happy," Elle said with a quick glance at all the guests.
"Yeah," X ran his clawed fingers threw his bride's hair, "So I thought maybe we'd spend our honeymoon in the tropics on Planet Miamilla."
"What's wrong with Earth?" Elle demanded.
"It's invested with all these hideous humans." X laughed.
"You are so full of it!" she snapped, "I'm a human, and you MARRIED me!"
"That's because you're not quite as bad as the rest of these little eared freaks." X smiled.
"Ugh, I can't believe that I'm now Mrs. Pointy Eared Lunatic!"
"HEY!" X yelled, "You must like these pointy ears, you married me!"
They kept fighting as they danced, half in love, half infuriated.
"Uh, I guess it's true that you always hurt the one you love?" Jay joked, Val elbowed him in the side.
X and Elle were arguing, but they were smiling too. Romance was complicated, they took a time out between insults to kiss and then resumed their little debate.
Aileen laughed and turned to Kay, "What do you think about that?"
Kay smiled and held her close, "I guess that's what you'd call, a happy ending."
___________________________________________________________________________
And they lived happily (and weirdly) ever after!
~THE END~