Generation X – Term One

Generation X – Autumn Term

Part One – Term Begins

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Author's Note: Aurora and Drosera here. Hello and welcome to our thoroughly fun and fabricated year at Hogwarts! This long Author's Note is here because we feel that this fiction needs a little explanation if it is to be properly understood. Generation X' takes place over an entire year at Hogwarts, and is separated into the Autumn, Spring and Summer terms as happens in the books. However, this is pretty much where the similarity ends.

Note: Harry and friends are in their sixth year, but the entirety of last year's seventh year (Fred, George, Lee et al) are still inexplicably present at Hogwarts. Do not ask us why; to avoid ickyness we had to make sure everyone was above the age of consent, and the only way we could do this was to bend the rules considerably. Also, if we did get rid of their year, we would lose some of the best characters. This fic was written and was always intended to be fun. It was with this in mind that we made this decision. This fiction is not to be taken seriously in any way at all. It was hugely entertaining to write and we hope this is reflected in the fact that it is enjoyable to read.

Warning: This fiction has been rated PG-13 for language, situations and mild sexual content. We take no responsibility for anything included in this fic. If you find strong language, mild sexual situations or any other content mentioned offensive then we suggest that you do not read this fiction and hit the back button now. For all the others of you, please read on!

Everybody is purposely a little out of character. For example in this fiction you will see a great deal of Slut!Hermione, (yes, see a lot of' in both senses) Bitch!Pansy, Naïve!Harry and DodgyCockneyGeezer!Lee, as well as many more.

Disclaimer: We disclaim all quotes we stole; these came from various sources which include but are not limited to Buffy, Red Dwarf, Maid Marian and her Merry Men, American Pie and Cruel Intentions. We also do not own any of JKR's characters. The only ones we own will appear later on in the Generation X Year.

For the moment, here is the entirety of the Autumn Term, divided into three chapters. The rest of the year should be appearing here soon. Please, please, PLEASE R/R this fiction! We can't tell you how much your comments mean to us. And as the remainder of this fic is still under construction, any ideas/suggestions you make can still be incorporated.

Okay, enough of this! Let's go!

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Harry stood on the platform with his trunk, glaring at Hermione. He really didn't understand how her mind worked. He didn't even know she liked Justin Finch-Fletchley, and now here she was...euurrgh! He didn't even want to look. He was glad when Ron came over, dragging a battered suitcase and grinning. He punched Harry on the shoulder in a friendly way, and Harry returned the gesture, trying hard not to show how much his arm was hurting.

"Harry, my man! Did you have a goOD suMMer of LUUrrrve?" Ron's voice was strangled and threatening to crack when it suddenly veered into a deep baritone. Harry was a little taken aback. He hadn't considered the prospect of his own voice breaking, and the Dursleys weren't exactly likely to give him 'the talk' anytime soon. Not that he minded; the idea of Vernon... well, it wasn't a pretty picture.

"Er...no," he replied to Ron's question. He didn't get much chance for that down at Little Whinging. Most of the time he wasn't even allowed out of the house.

"How's the action down at Ottery St. Catchpole, then?"

"It was flippin'!" was Ron's cryptic response. Harry took this to mean it had been good, which was lucky for Ron. Harry couldn't help feeling a little annoyed that he hadn't 'got some' first. Obviously being 'the boy who lived' didn't automatically qualify you to be 'the boy who scored.'

Hermione chose that moment to saunter over, balancing carefully on her platforms. A still-salivating Justin sloped off to board the train.

"So, boys. How, like, are you? I'm great! My holiday in America was, like, sooooo cool. I met some awesome people. But enough about me. How's it hanging?"

Without giving them a chance to answer, she pulled them both into a tight hug, causing several of the boys around them to groan with jealousy. Harry patted her cautiously on the back and pulled away.

"You sound... different. What happened to your voice?"

Hermione looked at him in a condescending manner.

"What's with the attitude, Harry? Lighten up, won't you?" She tossed her hair over her shoulder and straightened her extremely short skirt.

"So," Ron said, "new boyfriend, Hermione?" Hermione giggled, and shook her head.

"Who, Justin? No way! He's, like, soooo boring. I mean, yawn!"

Harry was a little surprised. She hadn't seemed so 'bored' by the book-loving Hufflepuff earlier. But he wasn't going to try and fathom Hermione's reasoning.

He didn't understand that girl anymore. One minute she was all over him, and the next she was flirting with every boy within a three mile radius. Slag, Harry thought bitterly.

Harry had really fancied her for ages now, and hadn't tried too hard to hide it. But she'd never given him any serious indication that she felt the same way.

While he had lapsed into reverie, Hermione had turned her attention to Ron. Ron was also keen to get it together with Hermione, but Harry didn't really think his friend was in with much of a chance.

Ron was lapping the attention up. Of course, the 16 year old Hermione was a far cry from her bushy-haired innocent look of five years ago. Her once mousy hair was now a rich chestnut and had lost its bushiness, cascading down her back in soft waves. Her eyes, large and deep brown, were always perfectly outlined with eyeshadow, eyeliner and mascara. Her lips were always covered in some sort of gloss or lipstick. And her figure slim and very attractive, she caught attention wherever she went.

They boarded the train. Hermione disappeared instantly into a crowd of seventh year boys. Further down the train, Ron spotted a spare two seats where they could sit. But before they could get there, Harry saw the possiblility for a much more advantageous seating arrangement. Cho Chang was sitting alone (for once) in a compartment, reading a magazine. Smoothing his hair, he pushed open the door and walked in.

Through the glass, Ron saw Cho smile and indicate that Harry should sit next to her. Scowling, he went in search of somewhere else to spend the journey. Unfortunately by this time the only empty seat was in a compartment with his sister Ginny and her fifth-year friends. He spent the entirety of the journey sulking in a corner while the troupe of girls whispered, giggled and pointed at him and his apparent lack of friends. Just his luck.

Harry settled into his seat next to Cho. Maybe he'd get some action with her now... he had heard some of the boys in the locker room talking about how easy she was.

"Harry! Did you have a good holiday? How's Sirius? Did you get my letter?"

Harry smiled. I'm in! His emerald green eyes caught her sparkling blue ones and they laughed. Somehow, he found himself wanting to shag Hermione less

Harry had never had the courage to ask Cho out since last year, when he had foolishly asked her to the Yule Ball. He felt himself blushing at the memory of how he'd stumbled over his words.

But it wouldn't happen again. He was much more suave, more sophisticated now. Perhaps he could try... well, it always worked in the films. Affecting a yawn, he lifted his arms above his head and tentatively brought one down to rest around her shoulder.

"Oh, Harry! How sweet!" Cho cooed, leaning her head on his arm. Harry allowed himself a self satisfied grin. She was hot for him, that was for sure. He looked down at her. Her hair, jet-black like his own, framed her face, accentuating her pretty features. Her eyes were closed as she leaned against him, and her lashes were fluttering slightly, like butterfly wings. Wow, that sounds quite poetic, Harry thought. Perhaps he could impress her with a compliment.

"Er, Cho?" He began.

"Yes, Harry?" She opened her eyes to look at him, and he was struck again by the startling blue of their colour, like icy pools. He was about to tell her this, but halfway between his brain and his mouth, something went awry.

"You've got well big knockers!" he blurted out.

"HARRY! You uncouth, male chauvinist pig! But thanks. You're cute, y'know?"

Well, that went better than I could have expected, he reasoned. And leaning down to her, he began to kiss her.

After three solid hours, Harry extricated himself from where he was lying in the luggage rack. His broomstick was digging into his back and he was very uncomfortable. Next to him, Cho was lying, her hair ruffled and her robes half-off.

"Are you sure you want to be doing this?" He asked her. Truth be told, he wasn't sure himself.

"Well it's not like you'd be my first I don't mind. It's up to you."

Harry's mind started working again. She wasn't a virgin! He should have expected it after all, she was a year older than him but still it put him on the spot, didn't it? He'd never done it before, and, while the prospect of boasting to Ron was extremely attractive, he didn't feel ready. Not yet. The time was not right. And anyway, what if she insulted the size of his...

CRASH!

At that minute, the door of the compartment burst open, and who should come in but Draco Malfoy, for once without Crabbe and Goyle. Instead in tow he had Pansy Parkinson, an extremely pretty girl with a long, straight sheet of blonde hair and a tiny, upturned nose. Draco dropped Pansy's hand as soon as he saw Harry and the semi-clothed Cho Chang.

"Well, well, well, Potter. I see you've finally removed the shrink wrap from your dick and started to fucking use it!" He smirked nastily, a la Stiffler.

"Dwaco, Dwaco!" Pansy's petulant voice seemed to penetrate Draco's very skull. She contorted her features so that the arrogant smirk on her face mirrored his own. The difference was that he made it look good. "Let's find another compartment. They're SICK!"

"It's alright, Pansy," He drawled, surveying the scene before him in distaste. "I've no wish to witness this. I've already had to watch American Pie forty-seven times in a row because of your penchant for teenage sex. Don't you get enough of that already?" He finished, with a smug and obvious look in Harry's direction.

"Yeah, that's right, Potter. Looks like you're going to be the only one at Hogwarts who's still only on first base!" Was it just Harry, or did he have a trace of an American accent when he said that? Harry blushed and quickly covered himself up. While he knew that what Malfoy was saying wasn't true (who'd ever sleep with Neville? For that matter, who'd ever even kiss Neville?) his words stung. Harry was very sensitive about the fact that he was still a virgin. Ron was too, but then for him there was always Ginny to take advantage of should he be so inclined not that Ron ever would be. Shuddering slightly at the thought of what a whole new family of inbred Weasleys would be like, he hopped down from the luggage rack and tried to look menacing.

"Are you here for any particular reason, or do you just get thrills from seeing a semi-naked chick?"

"Calm down, Potter. Me and Pansy here just wanted some privacy. We'll ah leave you two to it, shall we? Oh, and you'd better make it quick – the train arrives at Hogsmeade in twenty minutes." With that, the two of them left. Through the door, Harry could see Pansy shove Draco against the wall and start to well, let's just say they didn't seem particularly concerned with privacy now. Behind him, Cho was pulling on her robes again, and running a comb through her straight hair until it was immaculate once more. She shouldered her small bag and flashed Harry a devious smile.

"Maybe next time, eh Harry?" And she was gone. Harry flopped back onto the seat and sighed happily. I think she likes me!

Hermione woke up feeling fabulous. It was her birthday. She was seventeen! Today, the world was hers. She leapt out of bed and pranced over to the dressing table where she always began her beauty routine. After she had pulled on her new denim miniskirt and designer Gladrags: America T-shirt, she sat down and began to apply yet another coat of Perfect Purple Passion nail paint. Then she doused her face with warm water and ran her hand over her skin, expecting to feel her usually peachy-soft, clear complexion. But instead, she was met with a rough, bobbly texture. She yelled out in shock, dashing over to the nearest mirror. What she saw made her pass out. After she came round again, she was filled with disgust at the horrific sight which looked back at her. It was disgusting hideous a terrible sight to behold. NO. IT WAS NOT PERCY WITHOUT A TOWEL AFTER A SHOWER. Hermione shuddered at the memory.

IT WAS HER FACE.

Ugly red pustules covered her previously angelic features, making her almost unrecognisable. Lee would NEVER want to take her out now. Sinking onto her bed, feeling faint and dizzy once more, she dissolved into noisy, American, Sweet-Valley style tears of rage and disbelief.

Ron banged on the door of Hermione's dormitory, worry clouding his face. He called out to her.

"HerMIOne!" He clutched his throat as his voice rose in a strangled squeak. He doubted whether she'd heard him anyway; her sobs had escalated into almost hysterical shrieks. Abandoning his morals, he burst through the door.

Four hours later, they emerged. Hermione had been persuaded to face the world, but only after exchanging her scanty ensemble for an Arabian style pashmina that covered everything but her eyes and her left buttock. (Ron thought it would be entertaining to remove this section while she was fitting her Yashmak.) He wondered what Parvati would say when she found he had decimated her favourite robes. They entered the common room to appreciative cheers and whistles. Ron thought that this was because of the alteration he had made to Hermione's outfit. Hermione thought it was because of her new look'. She was sure she looked stunning in her new Asian Babe' clothes. In fact it was because well, what would YOU have thought they'd spent four hours alone doing?

Harry looked down. His wand was ready with an engorgement charm, poised in position... But should he do it? He could really impress Cho... and he wouldn't feel so inadequate anymore. Yes, he was definitely going to go for it. He knew it could be dangerous he would have asked Hermione to do it for him, but, wellHis thoughts were interrupted as Ron crashed in. His wand jerked two feet downwards and purple sparks shot out of it. He watched, horrified, as his foot swelled to many times its normal size. Phew. He was glad the charm had missed his target'. Ron stared.

"Cor! Nice, er foot you've got there!" Giving him a knowing nudge and a roguish wink, he continued mischievously,

"What made you do that, eh? What were you trying to do?"

"Well, y'know just messing about with my wand I mean" He gave up, as Ron chuckled dirtily.

"Go get em, tiger!"

Harry would never have believed how inconvenient a 6 – foot foot could be. He was trailing along on his way to Herbology, taking the long way round so that he could avoid the staircase. He was just passing the laundry room when something very strange happened. He saw Draco Malfoy cross the hall, carrying a bundle of sheets in his arms. He was extremely pink in the face, and went even more so when he spotted Harry. Harry tried and failed to hide his grotesque foot. What would Malfoy say? But for once, Draco didn't seem to have anything to say. Harry wondered what Draco was doing, in the laundry room of all places. But Harry wasn't like the other boys. He hadn't started todevelop yet. Could it be something to do with PUBERTY?!?

"You do it!"

"No, YOU do it!"

"Oh, for fuck's sake, you two, I'll do it." Dean interrupted Harry and Seamus, who were having a whispered argument. Dean strode over to where Ron was sitting.

"Er, Ron?"

"YeAH?"

"I er-" Dean sniggered momentarily. "Ron, you stink!"

"WHAT?!?"

"We – Harry, Seamus and myself – we reckon you've got BO."

"No WAY! I smell divine! Like roses, my mum said!"

"Dude, you smell like a Yeti!"

"I can't help it if my Oestrogen levels are fluctuating!"

"What yer fuckin' on about? Yeh've been readin' too much Witch's Own!"

"Shurrup!" Ron yelped, blushing.

"Anyway, we bought you some Mr. Skower's Magical BO Remover from the One Knut Shop in Hogsmeade."

Ron took it, still looking highly offended. After a moment, Dean prompted him.

"Well, piss off then! Go and try it out!"

Ron stormed off. Harry listened guiltily as he heard his best friend stamping up the stairs.

Hermione locked the door to her dormitory with a click. Returning to her desk, she ran her finger down the open page of a book until she found what she was looking for; an Acne Removing hex. But she was no Eloise Midgeon. This would be a success. She held a mirror in front of her face and muttered something. Touching her wand to a particularly large boil on her chin, she noticed with satisfaction that it disappeared the instant she prodded it. She continued in this way for about an hour until her face was clear once more. Smiling for what seemed like the first time in weeks, she dug around in her bulging make-up case until she unearthed her lip-gloss. She had a hot date tonight, with Lee. After discovering what Ron had done to her robes, she was out for revenge. And boy, would it be sweet. She hadn't told anyone about this yet, because she knew what they'd say.

Oh, remember what happened last time' He's too old for you' or He's only using you!' She didn't care. She liked Lee. She hated Angelina Johnson, and this was the perfect chance to get revenge on that stuck up bitch as well as make Ron incredibly jealous. She pulled her hair into an elaborate knot and slipped into her new purple minidress. Buckling her diamante sandals, she spritzed herself with perfume and sauntered down the stairs to where Lee stood waiting for her. He looked great in a tuxedo with his hair magically relaxed from its usual dreadlocks and slicked behind his ears. She flashed him a million-dollar smile and took his arm. They had waited until everyone was in the Great Hall before sneaking out a side door and onto the lawns.

"So, uh, Lee, like, where's the car?"

"Car? We're walking, ain't we?"

"That is so, like, lame! And I'd like to see you walk all the way to Hogsmeade with these heels!" She finished irritably, forgetting momentarily to put on her American sweet-valley-style accent.

Lee's eyes went all sparkly and he said cheekily, "Then I'll have to carry you, darling!"

"Oh, Lee! That is, like, soooooo romantic!"

He scooped her up in his manly arms and she giggled coquettishly. He managed about four steps before dropping her very unromantically in a muddy puddle.

"Lee, you incompetent!"

"Oh, crap! Sorry!"

"Can't we go by broomstick? It'll be sooooo cool, and I can, like, hold you by the waist!" Leaving Lee with this tempting offer, she sprinted back up to the castle, where she hastily exchanged her soiled purple dress for a skimpy backless black affair that had a sexy slit up the side. That ought to do it, Hermione thought. Now he'll have to sleep with me!

Harry pulled off his sweat-drenched Quidditch robes and dived into the cool waters of the shower. Neville's eyes followed him for a moment before he stepped out of the shadows and cleared his throat.

"Er, Harry?"

"What? Who's there?" Harry called out, scandalised.

"It's me Neville."

"What are you, GAY or something?"

"YES! I AM GAY!" Neville broke down into noisy sobs.

"Oh, don't be like that, Nev! It's perfectly normal to question your sexuality!" He'd read that in a magazine once, and it seemed like the right thing to say.

"Oh, thanks Harry! I just had to tell someone. I feel so lonely and confused!"

Remembering a useful if not entirely true anecdote, Harry continued.

"Dudley thought he was gay once. So I said, put your dick back on, you sad wanker' and he did. Problem solved, eh, Nev?"

Neville's tears reached a crescendo at Harry 's homophobic outlook on the situation, and Harry was forced to block his ears. For a moment, he thought about comforting him, but he didn't want to give Neville any ideas.

"Is it serious, Nev?"

"I've started-" Neville broke off for a moment to choke back another sob "-fancying other boys! What can I do? I know they don't like me in that way!"

Feeling rather uncomfortable about this, Harry coughed and said,

"Which, er boys would these be, Neville?"

"I can't tell you, Harry. I just can't!"

"Well, don't worry about it, Neville! I'm sure everything'll work out in the end. Haha."

He forced what he hoped was a reassuring laugh. Still very disturbed by the whole affair, he finished drying himself and pulled on his black school robes before striding through the changing-room doors. Neville watched him leave, a strange smile on his pudgy face.

Hermione took another sip from her near empty wine glass, keeping her eyes fixed on Lee.

"I need a fill-up," she said, her voice slightly slurred. Lee reached over a little unsteadily and poured the last of the red liquid from the expensive green bottle into her crystal glass. He spilt a little on the table cloth.

"Oops!" he said rather loudly, causing several couples at nearby tables to incline their heads in his direction. Hermione trailed her carefully manicured finger through the spilt wine and pressed her digit to Lee's lips.

"Sssh," she whispered huskily. He licked her finger hungrily. Hermione giggled again.

"Can we, um, like, find somewhere a little more private?" She glanced around the ritzy restaurant where they had chosen to eat. A quartet were playing classical music quietly and the large, richly decorated room was humming with the sound of conversation. The light was fairly low and came from the huge crystal chandeliers hanging from the dim ceiling. The atmosphere was very romantic, but not altogether appropriate for the evening she had planned.

"Sure. We'll leave in a minute. Just let me have one more one more little drink" Lee was clearly more drunk than she was, and she didn't want it to get any worse. She took his hand rather forcefully and half-dragged him onto the dance floor. They began a clumsy waltz, and Hermione had to try hard not to scream at Lee after he stepped on her toe for what seemed like the hundredth time. However, it had done the job and he seemed a lot more sober and a lot less resistant to her charms than he had been earlier in the evening once the dance was finished. He had only really opened up to her once they were on their second bottle of house wine. It was very pricey – Hermione was glad they were using Lee's dad's credit card. Smiling a little guiltily to herself, she pressed herself closer to him and said close to his ear,

"Let's get out of here."

He nodded quickly and they almost ran out of the restaurant, stopping only to pay the bill. Hermione slipped the receipt into her pocket. She'd give it to Lee tomorrow. They stepped out into the night. A chill wind was blowing and Hermione gave an involuntary shiver. Lee slipped his arm around her shoulders and they walked together over to where his Nimbus 2001 was padlocked to the broom-rack. Lee climbed on and Hermione sidled on behind him. She held onto him tightly, running her fingers sensually over his muscly chest. They took off, the wind whipping Hermione's carefully coifed hair so that it all fell down, blowing around her face wildly. She revelled in the sensation of being so close to him She felt a twinge of jealousy when she thought of Angelina, the only other girl in the school who could really compete with her in the looks stakes. Oh, well. She'd get her own back on that goody-two-shoes.

"I had a great night tonight, Hermione," Lee said. And she was sure he meant it. She really knew how to turn boys on.

"It's not over yet, honey," she purred. Lee turned around to look at her.

"What do you mean?" he asked. Well, duh! Hermione thought in irritation. How stupid can you get? Oh, well. I'll just have to make myself a little more obvious. She reached up to her new diamond earrings, pretending to feel them as though checking they were still in her ears.

"Oh, NO!" She wailed, filling her voice with false alarm. "My earring! Could it have gone over the side?" She leaned down, as though she was looking for it on the ground far below them, giving Lee a clear view of her ample cleavage. He stared. Hidden by her long hair, Hermione grinned. She sat up again, trying hard to hide her smile. After regaining his composure, Lee managed to re-employ the power of speech.

"Oh, dear," Lee said, sounding genuinely worried. "Was it very valuable?" Hermione ran a hand absently through her tousled hair, unintentionally exposing her ears, and the two glittering gems she was wearing in them.

"Hang on, Herm. They're both still there!" He said, sounding happy for her. Honestly, how slow was he?

"Oh, yeah! How, like, silly of me!" She grinned broadly at him.

"Thanks for being so concerned, though. You're really sweet." She leaned forward and kissed him. He let go of the broom to wrap his arms around her. She could smell his aftershave surely he couldn't ignore a hint this broad? She pulled him closer, calling up all her feminine charms. He broke away from her for a moment, understanding finally dawning in his eyes.

"Your dorm or mine?" He asked, the hint of a smile playing about his lips. Hermione felt a twinge of annoyance at the slightly patronising tone in his voice. It wasn't like she'd never done this before. But she was about to get what she wantedshe didn't answer his question. She just kissed him again.

Hermione woke the next morning to the sound of violent vomiting. Blinking as she made herself accustomed to the bright early light, she sat up, momentarily disoriented. Through a haze of alcoholic after-effects, she began to recollect the previous night. Boy, was she glad they'd used Lee's dorm. It had definitely been worth it. The look on Angelina's face when she walked in on them she'd never forget it. Hopefully it would be all round the school by breakfast time. She couldn't wait to speak to Ron. But for the moment there were slightly more immediate things to deal with.

"Who is that?" she called. "Are you OK?" She got no answer. She hopped out of bed and stepped into her pink fluffy slippers. Padding blearily across the dorm to the small ensuite bathroom, she knocked lightly on the door. "I said, are you OK?" The violent retching stopped for a moment and she heard Parvati reply, sounding weak and drained. "I'm alright, Hermione. Really." Another bout of disgusting noises ensued. When Hermione felt it was safe, she pushed open the door. Parvati's usually dark face was pale and she was crouched over the toilet, shivering. "I guess I wasn't the only one who had a bit too much to drink last night, eh?" Hermione enquired, unable to keep a hint of mischief out of her voice. She never had really liked Parvati much but she couldn't help feeling a little sorry for the girl. She looked and sounded pretty bad.

"Yeah yeah, that was it," Parvati managed. However, she didn't quite look at Hermione when she said that. Not that Hermione noticed; she was already swanning over to her dressing table to start repairing the damage her complexion had suffered from not taking off last night's make-up, and practise her scandalised' expression. She would need it when dismissing the rumours she had been spreading about herself.

End of Part One

A/N: Please R/R! And then, on you go to Part Two. Enjoy! ^_~ Aurora and Drosera.