A/N: Ok, I've decided to put up some more, even though I only got one
review so far, and that review said that chapter one was 'cute'. Death to
all cuteness!!!!
The next morning, both Bart and Lisa had a sugar-induced hangover.
"Ugh..." groaned Bart. "At least I didn't sign up for something dumb like Boy Scouts this time."
"Oh, Mister Bart," said Apu, who was standing in the front yard for no adequately explored reason. "Did you have another all-syrup squishy?"
"No," said Bart. "I spent the day at the new amusement park. And could you please not talk so loud? It's making my brain grind together!"
"A day at the amusement park!" Apu cried, making Bart wail in pain. "That is much, much worse than an all-syrup squshy! I must make sure Manjula does not bring the octuplets!" Apu turned and sped off down the street.
Homer came downstairs wearing a tye-died t-shirt and cargo shorts.
"Well, today I start work at my new job!" he said gleefully.
"You got a new job?" Lisa asked.
"Yeah, don't you remember?" Homer said. "I'm working at the amusemement park!"
"That's nice," Lisa said, and she and Bart went to get ice packs for their heads. Suddenly, the full effect of Homer's words sunk in. They whirled around, bright-eyed, feeling fine.
"You got a job at the amusement park?" Bart cried. "Hot DOG!"
"Yes!" said Lisa. "This is the happiest moment in my life!"
"Aw," sniffed Homer. "My kids are proud of me!"
"Hey, Dad, can we go to work with you today?" asked Lisa.
"Sorry, sweety," Homer said, ruffling her hair. "Daddy has to get used to work before he can bring his kids!"
And with that, Homer left for work, whistling.
"Step right up!" shouted Homer. He was working at one of the game booths. He stood on the counter, waving a tennis ball around and shouting. "Step right up! Win a prize!"
"What do I have to do?" a boy asked.
"Step right up!" Homer told him. "Hand over two bucks, hit the dummy with a tennis ball," he indicated a crash-test dummy covered in bullseye symbols, "and you could win a prize!"
He kept shouting while the boy begged his mom for two dollars. "Step right up! Hit the dummy and win a prize! Step right up!"
The boy grabbed a tennis ball and threw it. It hit Homer right in the stomach. Homer toppled over into the booth.
"Yeah!" shouted the boy. "I get a prize!"
The next day, Homer was slightly less enthusiastic about going to work at the amusement park. The day before, he had gotten hit in the stomach five times, hit in the head seven times, and burned his tongue when he tried to eat a hot dog strait off the grill.
To make matters worse, Marge came up to him just as he was about to leave.
"Homie, I really buisy today," she said. "Could you take Maggie to work with you?"
"D'oh!" said Homer, and then, "Ah...um...that is to say...Sure!" he said, not wanting to upset Marge.
"Thank you, Homie!" Marge said. She handed him Maggie, and then said, "Homer Simpson, you're my hero!" Homer grinned.
That day at the park it was Homer's job to stock the claw machines in the arcade. These are the machines where, if you put in fifty cents, you can move a claw around with a joy stick, and then (hopefully) pick up a prize with the claw. Maggie would sit in the big bag of prizes, and hand them to Homer, who would put them into the machine before locking it up.
"Well, Maggie, you are a good little helper!" Homer said truthfully. He stocked a claw machine full of colorful teddy bears and other stuffed animals. Then he closed the glass door and locked it. Suddenly, Maggie giggled, but it sounded strangely muffled. Homer looked back at the claw machine.
"D'oh!" he shouted. He had accidentally locked Maggie into the claw machine with the toys! She was having a grand old time, playing with the stuffed animals, but Homer had to get her out. He fumbled with the keys to the machine, and dropped them on the floor. Just then, a rat ran across his path, snatched up the keys in it's mouth, and scurried off.
"Hey!" Homer shouted. "Come back here, you little rat!" But the rat didn't listen. Homer fished in his pocket for his wallet, to get some quarters, but he had forgotten his wallet at home!.
"Oh, no, what am I gonna do?" wailed Homer.
"Mummy, can I try at that game?" said a voice. Homer looked up. A family was standing in front of the claw machine that held Maggie. The looked vey rich. The little girl was looking at her mother hopefully.
"Oh, I don't see why not," the mother said. She opened her wallet and handed the little girl a large handful of
quarters.
"Oh, thank you, Mummy!" the little girl said happily. She began playing, and got lots of prizes. Then, "Look, there is a little baby in the machine!" the girl cried. "I'm going to get the baby!" She pressed a button so that the claw dropped. It hooked itself around Maggie's pacifier, but Maggie refused to let go of it. The claw lifted up baby, pacifier, and all, and dropped Maggie down into the cubby where you could reach in to retrieve your prize. The little rich girl reached in and pulled Maggie out and hugged her tightly. Homer jumped up.
"Oh, thank goodness!" he said. "You got my baby outta there!"
"Your baby?" the little girl said. "This is MY baby!" She hugged Maggie tighter.
"Very good, dear," the girl's father said. "You should never give a baby to a fat bum like that. There's no telling what might happen!"
The rich family sauntered off with Maggie, leaving a very dejected Homer behind. He left work early, and wandered home, wondering how her was going to tell Marge.
A/N: That's the end of chapter two! Now I guess I'll HAVE to put up the rest!
The next morning, both Bart and Lisa had a sugar-induced hangover.
"Ugh..." groaned Bart. "At least I didn't sign up for something dumb like Boy Scouts this time."
"Oh, Mister Bart," said Apu, who was standing in the front yard for no adequately explored reason. "Did you have another all-syrup squishy?"
"No," said Bart. "I spent the day at the new amusement park. And could you please not talk so loud? It's making my brain grind together!"
"A day at the amusement park!" Apu cried, making Bart wail in pain. "That is much, much worse than an all-syrup squshy! I must make sure Manjula does not bring the octuplets!" Apu turned and sped off down the street.
Homer came downstairs wearing a tye-died t-shirt and cargo shorts.
"Well, today I start work at my new job!" he said gleefully.
"You got a new job?" Lisa asked.
"Yeah, don't you remember?" Homer said. "I'm working at the amusemement park!"
"That's nice," Lisa said, and she and Bart went to get ice packs for their heads. Suddenly, the full effect of Homer's words sunk in. They whirled around, bright-eyed, feeling fine.
"You got a job at the amusement park?" Bart cried. "Hot DOG!"
"Yes!" said Lisa. "This is the happiest moment in my life!"
"Aw," sniffed Homer. "My kids are proud of me!"
"Hey, Dad, can we go to work with you today?" asked Lisa.
"Sorry, sweety," Homer said, ruffling her hair. "Daddy has to get used to work before he can bring his kids!"
And with that, Homer left for work, whistling.
"Step right up!" shouted Homer. He was working at one of the game booths. He stood on the counter, waving a tennis ball around and shouting. "Step right up! Win a prize!"
"What do I have to do?" a boy asked.
"Step right up!" Homer told him. "Hand over two bucks, hit the dummy with a tennis ball," he indicated a crash-test dummy covered in bullseye symbols, "and you could win a prize!"
He kept shouting while the boy begged his mom for two dollars. "Step right up! Hit the dummy and win a prize! Step right up!"
The boy grabbed a tennis ball and threw it. It hit Homer right in the stomach. Homer toppled over into the booth.
"Yeah!" shouted the boy. "I get a prize!"
The next day, Homer was slightly less enthusiastic about going to work at the amusement park. The day before, he had gotten hit in the stomach five times, hit in the head seven times, and burned his tongue when he tried to eat a hot dog strait off the grill.
To make matters worse, Marge came up to him just as he was about to leave.
"Homie, I really buisy today," she said. "Could you take Maggie to work with you?"
"D'oh!" said Homer, and then, "Ah...um...that is to say...Sure!" he said, not wanting to upset Marge.
"Thank you, Homie!" Marge said. She handed him Maggie, and then said, "Homer Simpson, you're my hero!" Homer grinned.
That day at the park it was Homer's job to stock the claw machines in the arcade. These are the machines where, if you put in fifty cents, you can move a claw around with a joy stick, and then (hopefully) pick up a prize with the claw. Maggie would sit in the big bag of prizes, and hand them to Homer, who would put them into the machine before locking it up.
"Well, Maggie, you are a good little helper!" Homer said truthfully. He stocked a claw machine full of colorful teddy bears and other stuffed animals. Then he closed the glass door and locked it. Suddenly, Maggie giggled, but it sounded strangely muffled. Homer looked back at the claw machine.
"D'oh!" he shouted. He had accidentally locked Maggie into the claw machine with the toys! She was having a grand old time, playing with the stuffed animals, but Homer had to get her out. He fumbled with the keys to the machine, and dropped them on the floor. Just then, a rat ran across his path, snatched up the keys in it's mouth, and scurried off.
"Hey!" Homer shouted. "Come back here, you little rat!" But the rat didn't listen. Homer fished in his pocket for his wallet, to get some quarters, but he had forgotten his wallet at home!.
"Oh, no, what am I gonna do?" wailed Homer.
"Mummy, can I try at that game?" said a voice. Homer looked up. A family was standing in front of the claw machine that held Maggie. The looked vey rich. The little girl was looking at her mother hopefully.
"Oh, I don't see why not," the mother said. She opened her wallet and handed the little girl a large handful of
quarters.
"Oh, thank you, Mummy!" the little girl said happily. She began playing, and got lots of prizes. Then, "Look, there is a little baby in the machine!" the girl cried. "I'm going to get the baby!" She pressed a button so that the claw dropped. It hooked itself around Maggie's pacifier, but Maggie refused to let go of it. The claw lifted up baby, pacifier, and all, and dropped Maggie down into the cubby where you could reach in to retrieve your prize. The little rich girl reached in and pulled Maggie out and hugged her tightly. Homer jumped up.
"Oh, thank goodness!" he said. "You got my baby outta there!"
"Your baby?" the little girl said. "This is MY baby!" She hugged Maggie tighter.
"Very good, dear," the girl's father said. "You should never give a baby to a fat bum like that. There's no telling what might happen!"
The rich family sauntered off with Maggie, leaving a very dejected Homer behind. He left work early, and wandered home, wondering how her was going to tell Marge.
A/N: That's the end of chapter two! Now I guess I'll HAVE to put up the rest!