A Second Chance
By: Ashlee
Disclaimer: I don't own them because Donald Bellasario is being a jerk and won't share. I don't even want royalties or anything, just the knowledge that I have control over the lives of Harm and Mac and the rest, but nooooo Don has to be in charge.
Author's Note: Okay, this tends to happen to me, I get the oddest and seemingly the most inspirational ideas while getting ready for bed. I think it's my muses' (Habib is his name) attempt to drive me insane via lack of sleep or something. Anyway, written on April 27th at 11:27 pm – April 30th at 12:14 am.
Spoilers: Adrift I
Summery: Harm has been rescued (Not like in Adrift II, that hasn't happened) and he's a little worried, until Mac sets him strait.
Rated: PG I guess for like 3 swear words
Keywords: H/M R
Archiving: Please ask!! Just think, one more hit on your site, if nothing else!
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I open my eyes slowly and realize I'm in a strange room. I look down at myself and see that I'm lying in a hospital bed in a hospital gown. What happened? I remember flying back to get to Mac's wedding…then something happened, the equipment got fried and we ejected. I don't remember much else. Wait, Mac's wedding!!! I see the clock on the wall, I'm too late! I feel the sudden urge to cry. Not only did she get married with out me there, but I didn't even get a chance to tell her what I was planning on, what I had been trying to say for the last year.
I suddenly feel betrayed. I know it doesn't make much sense, but I do. It's like she stabbed me in the back, like she didn't care, that she didn't even notice I was gone. I'm supposed to be her best friend damn it! I clench my fists at my side and grit my teeth.
Just then I hear a voice from the doorway. "Harm? How are you feeling sailor? You gave us all quite a scare."
Mac, speak of the devil. "I'm fine." I grind out. "How was the wedding?"
She looks at me, shock and disbelief animating her features. "That's how little you think of me? You think I could go through something like that knowing that you're missing at sea? Don't you think I was worried sick? That I was up all night wondering if you were okay, if I would ever see you again?" She was beginning to cry and I was beginning to feel like a total ass. "I felt like my heart had been ripped out, I was terrified, the most scared I have *ever* been and you have the nerve to ask me how the wedding was?"
She was screaming now, tears running down her face and she was glaring at me. I opened my mouth and closed it. I don't know what the hell I was thinking. I know better then that, especially after the night at the Admiral's. "I guess I was just scared that I wouldn't get my chance to tell you, that maybe my worst fears had come true." It was then that I realized that I had said that out loud. I bring a hand to my mouth.
"What?" She asks looking at me incredulously.
I almost died out there, I almost lost everything, I almost lost *her*, and for some reason I lived, against all odds I had made it. I know the chances of survival at sea, and those swells were huge, the water was cold…the images and feelings were beginning to return. I should have died out there, but I didn't. I was getting a second chance, Mac hadn't gotten married. God, or some higher authority, was giving me another chance, and I knew that I had to take this chance before something else came to tear her away from me.
"A…all I thought about out there was how I had to get back, before it was to late, before I had blown everything. I needed…I had to tell you what I've been trying to since Sydney, since I lost you to Brumby. I guess I just assumed…I'm an ass, I know you wouldn't have gone through with it if you knew I was hurt, I guess I was just worried and scared and feeling like everything was going wrong, so why not add that? I felt like I had lost my chance…" I pause and look at her, not really sure how to rationalize my reaction to her. Maybe I should have told her it was the sea water talking.
She's staring at me, a little confused and dazed at my admission. "Lost your chance at what? What were you going to tell me?" She stood at the foot of my bed, her eyes encouraging me.
I look down at my hands on my lap, which I am trying not to fidget. A skill they teach you in law school. "That I didn't want you to marry him." I look up for a second and muster my courage. I'm a Navy pilot, damn it, I can do this. I'm not going to blow this chance all to hell. "That I love you."
Her mouth falls open, and her jaw literally almost falls to where it could touch her chest. Slowly her shocked look is replaced by a small, unsure smile. "You mean that?"
I'm nervous now. Everything is in the open and I just exposed my underbelly. I hope she doesn't pounce. "Yeah." I say seriously, looking her in the eyes, willing her to feel the same.
Her smile grew wider, but she didn't come any closer. A tear ran down her cheek and she brushed it away. "It's amazing what you realize when something horrible and unexpected happens. I guess I always assumed that you would be around, that no matter what else happened I would always have you there with me. I never expected…this. You to crash. It's one of those things that happens to other people. When I heard…" She had turned away from me, so I couldn't see her face. "When I heard what had happened I lost it. My world fell apart. I didn't…" She turns back to look at me, tears running in a constant stream down her cheeks. "You weren't supposed to cause that, Mic was! I went into my office and cried. I didn't know what was wrong with me…the hollow feeling in my stomach; my heart felt like someone had ripped it out and stomped on it. And finally I realized what was wrong. I had lost the one man that I loved, the one man that I was *in* love with. I had lost it all, in one split second, with one call, my life was over."
If I could have stood I would have, but as it was there was some sort of contraption on my knee. I wanted to hold her, to tell her that everything was okay. "I'm sorry Mac, I shouldn't have left."
She wiped away the tears. "Don't blame yourself. If this hadn't happened we wouldn't have been able to admit to what was between us. Even in Sydney I don't think I knew how I truly felt. Sometimes it takes almost losing someone to make you realize how much you love them." She stood next to me and brushed a stray piece of hair back into place, and kissed my forehead. Being the over eager sailor that I am, I pull her into a gentle kiss.
"It's too bad it takes a near death experience to get me to admit that I love you, imagine what it'll take to get me to propose!" I smile that award winning smile and she smacks me on the arm.
"Don't even joke about that…and what makes you think you'll propose?"
I look up at her tenderly and grab her hand, giving it a squeeze. "Now that I have you Marine, I'm never letting go."
By: Ashlee
Disclaimer: I don't own them because Donald Bellasario is being a jerk and won't share. I don't even want royalties or anything, just the knowledge that I have control over the lives of Harm and Mac and the rest, but nooooo Don has to be in charge.
Author's Note: Okay, this tends to happen to me, I get the oddest and seemingly the most inspirational ideas while getting ready for bed. I think it's my muses' (Habib is his name) attempt to drive me insane via lack of sleep or something. Anyway, written on April 27th at 11:27 pm – April 30th at 12:14 am.
Spoilers: Adrift I
Summery: Harm has been rescued (Not like in Adrift II, that hasn't happened) and he's a little worried, until Mac sets him strait.
Rated: PG I guess for like 3 swear words
Keywords: H/M R
Archiving: Please ask!! Just think, one more hit on your site, if nothing else!
------
I open my eyes slowly and realize I'm in a strange room. I look down at myself and see that I'm lying in a hospital bed in a hospital gown. What happened? I remember flying back to get to Mac's wedding…then something happened, the equipment got fried and we ejected. I don't remember much else. Wait, Mac's wedding!!! I see the clock on the wall, I'm too late! I feel the sudden urge to cry. Not only did she get married with out me there, but I didn't even get a chance to tell her what I was planning on, what I had been trying to say for the last year.
I suddenly feel betrayed. I know it doesn't make much sense, but I do. It's like she stabbed me in the back, like she didn't care, that she didn't even notice I was gone. I'm supposed to be her best friend damn it! I clench my fists at my side and grit my teeth.
Just then I hear a voice from the doorway. "Harm? How are you feeling sailor? You gave us all quite a scare."
Mac, speak of the devil. "I'm fine." I grind out. "How was the wedding?"
She looks at me, shock and disbelief animating her features. "That's how little you think of me? You think I could go through something like that knowing that you're missing at sea? Don't you think I was worried sick? That I was up all night wondering if you were okay, if I would ever see you again?" She was beginning to cry and I was beginning to feel like a total ass. "I felt like my heart had been ripped out, I was terrified, the most scared I have *ever* been and you have the nerve to ask me how the wedding was?"
She was screaming now, tears running down her face and she was glaring at me. I opened my mouth and closed it. I don't know what the hell I was thinking. I know better then that, especially after the night at the Admiral's. "I guess I was just scared that I wouldn't get my chance to tell you, that maybe my worst fears had come true." It was then that I realized that I had said that out loud. I bring a hand to my mouth.
"What?" She asks looking at me incredulously.
I almost died out there, I almost lost everything, I almost lost *her*, and for some reason I lived, against all odds I had made it. I know the chances of survival at sea, and those swells were huge, the water was cold…the images and feelings were beginning to return. I should have died out there, but I didn't. I was getting a second chance, Mac hadn't gotten married. God, or some higher authority, was giving me another chance, and I knew that I had to take this chance before something else came to tear her away from me.
"A…all I thought about out there was how I had to get back, before it was to late, before I had blown everything. I needed…I had to tell you what I've been trying to since Sydney, since I lost you to Brumby. I guess I just assumed…I'm an ass, I know you wouldn't have gone through with it if you knew I was hurt, I guess I was just worried and scared and feeling like everything was going wrong, so why not add that? I felt like I had lost my chance…" I pause and look at her, not really sure how to rationalize my reaction to her. Maybe I should have told her it was the sea water talking.
She's staring at me, a little confused and dazed at my admission. "Lost your chance at what? What were you going to tell me?" She stood at the foot of my bed, her eyes encouraging me.
I look down at my hands on my lap, which I am trying not to fidget. A skill they teach you in law school. "That I didn't want you to marry him." I look up for a second and muster my courage. I'm a Navy pilot, damn it, I can do this. I'm not going to blow this chance all to hell. "That I love you."
Her mouth falls open, and her jaw literally almost falls to where it could touch her chest. Slowly her shocked look is replaced by a small, unsure smile. "You mean that?"
I'm nervous now. Everything is in the open and I just exposed my underbelly. I hope she doesn't pounce. "Yeah." I say seriously, looking her in the eyes, willing her to feel the same.
Her smile grew wider, but she didn't come any closer. A tear ran down her cheek and she brushed it away. "It's amazing what you realize when something horrible and unexpected happens. I guess I always assumed that you would be around, that no matter what else happened I would always have you there with me. I never expected…this. You to crash. It's one of those things that happens to other people. When I heard…" She had turned away from me, so I couldn't see her face. "When I heard what had happened I lost it. My world fell apart. I didn't…" She turns back to look at me, tears running in a constant stream down her cheeks. "You weren't supposed to cause that, Mic was! I went into my office and cried. I didn't know what was wrong with me…the hollow feeling in my stomach; my heart felt like someone had ripped it out and stomped on it. And finally I realized what was wrong. I had lost the one man that I loved, the one man that I was *in* love with. I had lost it all, in one split second, with one call, my life was over."
If I could have stood I would have, but as it was there was some sort of contraption on my knee. I wanted to hold her, to tell her that everything was okay. "I'm sorry Mac, I shouldn't have left."
She wiped away the tears. "Don't blame yourself. If this hadn't happened we wouldn't have been able to admit to what was between us. Even in Sydney I don't think I knew how I truly felt. Sometimes it takes almost losing someone to make you realize how much you love them." She stood next to me and brushed a stray piece of hair back into place, and kissed my forehead. Being the over eager sailor that I am, I pull her into a gentle kiss.
"It's too bad it takes a near death experience to get me to admit that I love you, imagine what it'll take to get me to propose!" I smile that award winning smile and she smacks me on the arm.
"Don't even joke about that…and what makes you think you'll propose?"
I look up at her tenderly and grab her hand, giving it a squeeze. "Now that I have you Marine, I'm never letting go."