It was a typical day in the land of Grundo. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and little insects were chirping happily. In the center of a large clearing stood a small, comfortable looking house. Oddly, in the midst of this peace and tranquility came the jolting sound of cannon fire. BOOM! A single cannon ball fell out of the sky, well clear of the little house, and joined the hundred others that sprinkled the valley floor like a giant child's game of marbles. A scream of frustration echoed from a solitary tower that stood at the edge of the valley.
"DRAT!! I'LL GET YOU, GIMMICK, IF IT'S THE LAST THING I EVER DO!!!"
Crystal Quest: Chapter 2
In the cozy kitchen of the little house surrounded by cannon balls, Grubby the Octopede was preparing a mid-morning snack for himself. He hummed happily as he moved around the kitchen, deftly avoiding knocking things over despite his long, yellow body and eight hands. Actually, having so many hands often came in very useful while he was cooking. He turned down the heat on the stove and tasted his masterpiece. It was perfect. He thought his friends might want to share in the wonderful meal, so he called out to his best friend who was working quietly in the next room.
"I'm makin' root stew. You want some Teddy?" Root stew was widely regarded by Octopedes as one of the most delicious dishes among all Octopede cuisine. Unfortunately, very few species other than Octopedes could stand it. It had the consistency and taste of glue. It also made an excellent projectile weapon, but Grubby considered that a waste of good cooking.
"Um, no, thanks Grubby." Teddy Ruxpin wrinkled his nose at the smell of the foul concoction. He was very thankful that Grubby was in the other room. He didn't want to hurt his friend's feelings, but root stew was the one dish that Teddy absolutely hated. If he were stranded in the middle of the Great Desert and had to choose between root stew and nothing, well, let's just say that he'd avoid that situation at all possible cost. Heck, he'd had better food when he was a prisoner of MAVO.
"You sure? It's better than ever! I added a special secret ingredient," Grubby said. He kicked open the kitchen door and walked into the living room to hover over Teddy, an Iliop, who sat at the table. Iliops by their nature are cute, cuddly-looking creatures. Teddy was no exception, and Grubby often thought his friend looked almost like a child's stuffed toy that they would take to bed with them. As for Teddy, he immediately put on a good face and looked up at Grubby.
"What's that?" Teddy asked, smiling.
"Well if I told ya it wouldn't be a secret, now would it? Hu hoo!" Grubby laughed heartily at his joke and Teddy smiled good-naturedly.
"No Grubby, I guess it wouldn't." Grubby noticed that the table in front of Teddy was covered with large sheets of paper and books. It looked like Teddy was doing some sort of research.
"Watcha doin' Teddy?" he asked.
"I'm looking at some maps of Grundo. I'm trying to decide where we should start looking for our next adventure." Grubby blanched at the thought. He'd had enough adventure to last him the rest of his life.
"Teddy, I don't think I'm really up for any more adventurin'. I've got all the adventure I need right here in the kitchen. Besides, adventurin' is dangerous." Grubby scanned the maps on the table, remembering another, much older, map, and all the problems they'd encountered on THAT adventure. Teddy frowned.
"That's what you said before we left Rilonia the first time."
"And I was right!" Grubby interjected, "First we ran into the Bounders, then Tweeg, the Mudblups, the Gutangs, and eventually even MAVO!"
"But Grubby, just think of all the amazing things we've learned and all the wonderful friends we've made," said Teddy. Teddy was the type of person who always tried to look at the bright side of life. He sometimes wished Grubby would try to be less negative. Teddy knew that unless you looked for the positives, you were likely to miss them.
"If we hadn't come to Grundo we'd never have found the crystals, and we'd never have met Gimmick, Leota, Wooly, the Fobs, Prince Arin, Princess Arusia, the Anythings, the Wogglies, the Surf Grunges, the Jungle Grunges, why, even Tweeg and LB aren't so bad once you get to know them."
Grubby, who had been nodding in agreement as Teddy listed so many of their friends, froze mid-nod as Teddy mentioned Tweeg's name. He crossed his arms and glared at Teddy.
"Teddy, I was right there with you up until that part about Tweeg."
"Now Grubby, . . ." Teddy started to stand up as his friend interrupted him.
"No Teddy." Grubby looked sideways at Teddy. Sometimes he thought Teddy was just TOO nice. He often thought Teddy looked too hard for the good side of people and didn't pay enough attention to the things he didn't want to see. Because of that, he was always worried that Teddy would get hurt. Better safe than sorry; that was his philosophy.
"As far as I'm concerned, Tweeg and LB are just as bad as any of those evil monsters and villains."
"I'll tell him you think so. It might cheer him up." From just outside the open window, Teddy and Grubby heard the unmistakable wheezing laughter of none other than . . .
"LB!!" both Teddy and Grubby exclaimed at once. They both went over to the window and looked out. Right below, LB was looking up at them through the window, standing on a cannon ball on the lawn.
"That's my name, don't wear it out," he said, smirking. LB was a typical bounder. He was short, rotund, and red. He had two legs and no arms, a single horn sticking up out of a small tuft of hair on top of his head, and a huge mouth full of rotten, razor sharp teeth. All in all, he resembled a mutant killer tomato.
"What are you doin' here?" asked Grubby suspiciously, "Did you come here to spy on us again?"
"As a matter of fact, yes." LB jumped down from the cannon ball, and the words "Return to Tweeg" were visible, etched onto its surface.
"Well why don't you come inside then?" Teddy asked cheerfully. "You can spy on us much more easily from inside the house than from out there."
"Teddy!!" Grubby exclaimed, horrified.
"Grubby, I think you owe it to him to be polite. The last time I invited him over, you and Gimmick chased him off." Teddy was almost angry, and whispered so that LB couldn't hear. LB hopped into the house and looked around. He immediately noticed the maps and papers strewn across the table and hopped up onto the chair where Teddy had been seated earlier.
"So, you guys planning a trip somewhere?" LB stood awkwardly on one foot and used the other to shuffle through the papers that Teddy had left on the table.
"Teddy, I think I'll excuse myself so that you and your FRIEND can spend quality time together. I'll go ask Gimmick if he'd like some of my root stew." Grubby didn't even try to conceal his dislike of Teddy's guest. Teddy sighed. He'd really hoped that Grubby would try to be more open-minded.
"Okay Grubby," Teddy said, obviously disappointed, "please tell him that LB is here so that he doesn't jump to the wrong conclusion if he sees him."
"Sure, Teddy, whatever you say." Grubby climbed the stairs to the second floor of Gimmick's house to find the inventor. Newton Gimmick was likely working on some new wacky invention that probably wouldn't work properly. Grubby half-hoped it would be some kind of anti-bounder device.
"Sorry about that," apologized Teddy.
LB didn't even look up, but continued to read Teddy's notes. "S'okay, I'm used to it," he said, "besides, I already told you I got an image to maintain."
Teddy thought back to that time not so long ago. After months of trying, MAVO had finally captured Teddy and stolen the 6 magic crystals. Somehow, LB had become the leader of MAVO and he'd used his power to set Teddy free. "Don't mention it," he'd said, "and I mean that. I got a reputation to think about."
"Yes, I remember." Teddy sat down on the couch and watched LB.
"LB?"
"Yeah?"
"I was wondering. Do you have any idea what lies beyond the Great Desert?"
LB looked up at Teddy and cocked his head to the side. "Beyond the Great Desert?" he asked, "I don't think anyone's ever been beyond the Great Desert."
"Oh," Teddy replied, a little disappointedly.
"But I'll tell you what; I'll ask around. I ain't exactly well traveled, you know? Although I gotta admit, I've done more traveling since you guys got here than I ever did before. Buffy once called me 'worldly', whatever that means." LB laughed.
Teddy laughed along with LB, then asked, "And how is Buffy? Come to think of it, this is the first time I've seen you since the wedding. Did you have a nice honeymoon?"
"It was okay. Getting married is weird. But we're still settling in, you know? It's gonna take time to get used to it."
"I see," said Teddy. He suddenly realized that he wasn't being a very good host. "Would you like something to eat or drink? I think we have some root beer," he said. Root beer was another Octopede invention, but unlike root stew, root beer actually tasted good.
"Not really." LB jumped off the chair and hopped over to where Teddy sat on the couch. He stood and gazed at Teddy with an undecipherable look. Teddy felt a little uncomfortable.
"Hey Buxbin, you mind answering a question?" LB asked.
"Of course not."
"Ever since you guys came here, me and Twiddle-dumb have spent almost every waking hour trying to make your life miserable. So how come you're always tryin' to be so nice to me?" Teddy thought LB looked genuinely confused and even a little concerned. He decided to answer honestly.
"Because I think that deep down, you really aren't a bad person. Trust and respect have to start somewhere. I hope that if I trust and respect you, that someday you'll honor that trust and we can all be friends."
LB looked thoughtful for a minute. However, he quickly regained his uncaring attitude.
"Yeah, well don't hold your breath," he said flippantly.
Teddy smiled. "It's okay LB, I don't expect you to believe in me. But I think it's important for you to know that I believe in you." For some reason LB suddenly started laughing like a hyena. He laughed so hard that he found himself rolling on the floor. When he'd finally pulled himself together enough, he looked up at the confused Iliop.
"Rustbin, do you ever listen to yourself?"
"What do you mean?" Teddy asked. "Of course I do."
"Oh come on! You sound like a motivational speaker or some kind of self-help thingamabob."
"I guess that's just how I am. But you know, I have to be myself."
Suddenly, and for no apparent reason, Teddy started singing slowly.
"I know sometimes it can be hard
The feelings you must hide,
When the people all around you
Don't know who you are inside."
Teddy picked up the tempo as he continued to sing. LB, for his part, started to move in time with the music.
"But if you be yourself,
No one else can do it.
Be yourself,
You'll see there's nothing to it."
Together Teddy and LB danced around the living room.
"Even if you're not Mr. Popularity,
You won't be happy unless you can be,
"You can be yourself."
"What else would I be?" LB sang out as well.
"Be yourself."
"I have to be me!" Teddy exclaimed, and together they finished the song.
"Just one thing that you gotta do,
Above all else to thine own self be true!"
With a final pose and flourish as though they were on stage, Teddy and LB together shouted, "BE YOURSELF!"
From the second floor Gimmick's voice rang out through the house.
"WHAT IS, er, GOING ON DOWN, uh, THERE!!"
"I think that's my cue to be going," said LB, skipping towards the front door.
"Wait! You don't have to leave," said Teddy, looking back over his shoulder with a scowl at the stairs leading up to the second story.
"Yes, I do. Tweeze's probably been waiting for me; I was supposed to have been back a while ago. Of course, I would've been late no matter what." LB laughed his trademark wheezing laughter. "It's so much more fun to watch him get angry," he added.
LB hopped out the door, then turned back to Teddy and said, "Hey, let me ask you one more question."
"What's that?" Teddy asked.
"You're always such a goody-two-shoes. I'm wonderin' if you ever get the urge to beat the crap out of some jerk who desperately deserves it."
Teddy was taken aback by the bluntness of the question, but before he could answer he heard crashing noises coming from the stairs and Gimmick yelling. Teddy sighed.
LB bounded away from the house and called back over his shoulder, "THINK ABOUT IT!!"
Teddy watched LB head back to Tweeg's tower. When he was out of sight he turned back to the inside of the house. He was almost afraid to look.
The sight that greeted him was not pretty. Gimmick and Grubby were both at the bottom of the stairs, tangled in some sort of wire. It seemed like the more they struggled the more tangled they became.
"Teddy!" Gimmick called, "Why don't you, er, uh, go into the kitchen and get some eh, uh, uh, wire cutters. They're in the, uh, bottom, uh, drawer next to the, er, uh, stove."
"Okay, Gimmick," Teddy said as he headed into the kitchen.
"AND HURRY!" Grubby yelled, "THIS THING'S GETTIN' REALLY TIGHT!"
"ALRIGHT, I'M HURRYING!" Teddy yelled back. He frowned as he searched through the kitchen drawer. He finally found the wire cutters and went back into the main room to set Grubby and Gimmick free.
Newton Gimmick, the most famous inventor in Grundo and the owner of the house where Teddy and Grubby were currently living, carefully examined the remains of his latest experiment while Teddy and Grubby looked on.
"Oh, uh, dear. It's, uh, I'm afraid it's not, uh, salvageable."
"What was it?" Teddy asked, curiously picking up pieces of metal.
Gimmick adjusted his glasses. "It was going to be an, er, eh, automatic clothesline."
Gimmick was a Purloon (in other countries called a Human), one of the most common races living in Grundo. He was an older man, at least 50, with thick black-rimmed glasses, a white mustache, and a shiny baldhead surrounded by a ring of white hair. He was a scientist and an inventor, but unfortunately his inventions never seemed to work just right. More often than not they seemed to backfire completely. But Gimmick took it all in stride, because he knew that the greatest inventions often required years of trial and error. And it didn't hurt that he seemed to have serendipitous luck; often his inventions worked in ways that he himself had never dreamed of.
"Well, I'll get the broom so we can start to clean this up," Teddy said. He started to head toward the kitchen when there was a knock at the front door.
"I'LL GET IT!!" Grubby shouted as he raced to the door. Teddy smiled at his friend's childlike attitude.
"It better not be one of those bounders playing another practical joke," Gimmick said threateningly. Teddy looked at Gimmick and felt a strange, sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. Somehow, he felt that something wasn't right.
Grubby threw open the front door.
"What the. ..!" Grubby fell over backwards onto his rump as something blue fell on top of him. Teddy and Gimmick both rushed over to see what it was. It was Old Beanly, the Royal Messenger.
Teddy tried to help Grubby carry Old Beanly to the couch. The aging messenger was obviously hurt, but Teddy had no idea how badly.
"Oh, my!" Gimmick exclaimed, "Er, I'll go and get some, uh, water and the, eh, uh, first aid, uh, kit!"
"What d'ya suppose happened?" Grubby asked nervously as he and Teddy gently laid Old Beanly down.
"I don't know," Teddy said, "but I think we should find out." Teddy leaned down closer to Old Beanly.
"Teddy, I. . ."
"Shh! I think he's trying to say something!" Teddy interrupted Grubby, then leaned in even closer. Old Beanly opened his eyes and looked at Teddy. Then his eyes became unfocused and he spoke so softely that Teddy could barely hear him.
"Gutangs. . . please . . .help . . .king." Just as he finished, his eyes closed and he lost consciousness.
"Old Beanly!" Teddy cried.
"Oh, uh, dear!" Gimmick said, "Here's the er, uh, first aid. Teddy, let me, uh, uh, look at him." Teddy stepped back and Gimmick set about trying to help Old Beanly as Teddy and Grubby watched.
"Is he . . .?" Grubby started to ask, but couldn't finish the question. He swallowed loudly.
"No," Gimmick answered the unasked question, "but he is badly, uh, hurt. I'm afraid I can only do so, uh, much."
"We need to get him to a doctor," Teddy concluded.
"But Teddy, there aren't any doctors around here," Grubby said, sounding panicky.
"The closest, uh, doctor, would be in the, er, elf village," Gimmick answered.
"Okay then, Grubby, you get the airship fired up; I'll get some supplies together. As soon as Gimmick thinks it's safe we'll take Old Beanly to the elf village."
As everyone set about their tasks, Teddy felt the sick feeling in his stomach grow. He considered what Old Beanly had said and thought about King Nogburt and all his friends who lived in Nogburt's castle. Looking out the window toward Tweeg's tower, he remembered the conversation he had just had with LB and the unanswered question LB had left him with.
"Yes," he answered quietly to himself, "I do."
...TO BE CONTINUED
Yes, they sing and dance. It's Teddy Ruxpin - what do you expect?
Slayers is copyright a bunch of other people, and the video series is
distributed in the US by Central Park Media. Teddy Ruxpin was copyright
Alchemy II, created by Ken Forsse.
"DRAT!! I'LL GET YOU, GIMMICK, IF IT'S THE LAST THING I EVER DO!!!"
Crystal Quest: Chapter 2
In the cozy kitchen of the little house surrounded by cannon balls, Grubby the Octopede was preparing a mid-morning snack for himself. He hummed happily as he moved around the kitchen, deftly avoiding knocking things over despite his long, yellow body and eight hands. Actually, having so many hands often came in very useful while he was cooking. He turned down the heat on the stove and tasted his masterpiece. It was perfect. He thought his friends might want to share in the wonderful meal, so he called out to his best friend who was working quietly in the next room.
"I'm makin' root stew. You want some Teddy?" Root stew was widely regarded by Octopedes as one of the most delicious dishes among all Octopede cuisine. Unfortunately, very few species other than Octopedes could stand it. It had the consistency and taste of glue. It also made an excellent projectile weapon, but Grubby considered that a waste of good cooking.
"Um, no, thanks Grubby." Teddy Ruxpin wrinkled his nose at the smell of the foul concoction. He was very thankful that Grubby was in the other room. He didn't want to hurt his friend's feelings, but root stew was the one dish that Teddy absolutely hated. If he were stranded in the middle of the Great Desert and had to choose between root stew and nothing, well, let's just say that he'd avoid that situation at all possible cost. Heck, he'd had better food when he was a prisoner of MAVO.
"You sure? It's better than ever! I added a special secret ingredient," Grubby said. He kicked open the kitchen door and walked into the living room to hover over Teddy, an Iliop, who sat at the table. Iliops by their nature are cute, cuddly-looking creatures. Teddy was no exception, and Grubby often thought his friend looked almost like a child's stuffed toy that they would take to bed with them. As for Teddy, he immediately put on a good face and looked up at Grubby.
"What's that?" Teddy asked, smiling.
"Well if I told ya it wouldn't be a secret, now would it? Hu hoo!" Grubby laughed heartily at his joke and Teddy smiled good-naturedly.
"No Grubby, I guess it wouldn't." Grubby noticed that the table in front of Teddy was covered with large sheets of paper and books. It looked like Teddy was doing some sort of research.
"Watcha doin' Teddy?" he asked.
"I'm looking at some maps of Grundo. I'm trying to decide where we should start looking for our next adventure." Grubby blanched at the thought. He'd had enough adventure to last him the rest of his life.
"Teddy, I don't think I'm really up for any more adventurin'. I've got all the adventure I need right here in the kitchen. Besides, adventurin' is dangerous." Grubby scanned the maps on the table, remembering another, much older, map, and all the problems they'd encountered on THAT adventure. Teddy frowned.
"That's what you said before we left Rilonia the first time."
"And I was right!" Grubby interjected, "First we ran into the Bounders, then Tweeg, the Mudblups, the Gutangs, and eventually even MAVO!"
"But Grubby, just think of all the amazing things we've learned and all the wonderful friends we've made," said Teddy. Teddy was the type of person who always tried to look at the bright side of life. He sometimes wished Grubby would try to be less negative. Teddy knew that unless you looked for the positives, you were likely to miss them.
"If we hadn't come to Grundo we'd never have found the crystals, and we'd never have met Gimmick, Leota, Wooly, the Fobs, Prince Arin, Princess Arusia, the Anythings, the Wogglies, the Surf Grunges, the Jungle Grunges, why, even Tweeg and LB aren't so bad once you get to know them."
Grubby, who had been nodding in agreement as Teddy listed so many of their friends, froze mid-nod as Teddy mentioned Tweeg's name. He crossed his arms and glared at Teddy.
"Teddy, I was right there with you up until that part about Tweeg."
"Now Grubby, . . ." Teddy started to stand up as his friend interrupted him.
"No Teddy." Grubby looked sideways at Teddy. Sometimes he thought Teddy was just TOO nice. He often thought Teddy looked too hard for the good side of people and didn't pay enough attention to the things he didn't want to see. Because of that, he was always worried that Teddy would get hurt. Better safe than sorry; that was his philosophy.
"As far as I'm concerned, Tweeg and LB are just as bad as any of those evil monsters and villains."
"I'll tell him you think so. It might cheer him up." From just outside the open window, Teddy and Grubby heard the unmistakable wheezing laughter of none other than . . .
"LB!!" both Teddy and Grubby exclaimed at once. They both went over to the window and looked out. Right below, LB was looking up at them through the window, standing on a cannon ball on the lawn.
"That's my name, don't wear it out," he said, smirking. LB was a typical bounder. He was short, rotund, and red. He had two legs and no arms, a single horn sticking up out of a small tuft of hair on top of his head, and a huge mouth full of rotten, razor sharp teeth. All in all, he resembled a mutant killer tomato.
"What are you doin' here?" asked Grubby suspiciously, "Did you come here to spy on us again?"
"As a matter of fact, yes." LB jumped down from the cannon ball, and the words "Return to Tweeg" were visible, etched onto its surface.
"Well why don't you come inside then?" Teddy asked cheerfully. "You can spy on us much more easily from inside the house than from out there."
"Teddy!!" Grubby exclaimed, horrified.
"Grubby, I think you owe it to him to be polite. The last time I invited him over, you and Gimmick chased him off." Teddy was almost angry, and whispered so that LB couldn't hear. LB hopped into the house and looked around. He immediately noticed the maps and papers strewn across the table and hopped up onto the chair where Teddy had been seated earlier.
"So, you guys planning a trip somewhere?" LB stood awkwardly on one foot and used the other to shuffle through the papers that Teddy had left on the table.
"Teddy, I think I'll excuse myself so that you and your FRIEND can spend quality time together. I'll go ask Gimmick if he'd like some of my root stew." Grubby didn't even try to conceal his dislike of Teddy's guest. Teddy sighed. He'd really hoped that Grubby would try to be more open-minded.
"Okay Grubby," Teddy said, obviously disappointed, "please tell him that LB is here so that he doesn't jump to the wrong conclusion if he sees him."
"Sure, Teddy, whatever you say." Grubby climbed the stairs to the second floor of Gimmick's house to find the inventor. Newton Gimmick was likely working on some new wacky invention that probably wouldn't work properly. Grubby half-hoped it would be some kind of anti-bounder device.
"Sorry about that," apologized Teddy.
LB didn't even look up, but continued to read Teddy's notes. "S'okay, I'm used to it," he said, "besides, I already told you I got an image to maintain."
Teddy thought back to that time not so long ago. After months of trying, MAVO had finally captured Teddy and stolen the 6 magic crystals. Somehow, LB had become the leader of MAVO and he'd used his power to set Teddy free. "Don't mention it," he'd said, "and I mean that. I got a reputation to think about."
"Yes, I remember." Teddy sat down on the couch and watched LB.
"LB?"
"Yeah?"
"I was wondering. Do you have any idea what lies beyond the Great Desert?"
LB looked up at Teddy and cocked his head to the side. "Beyond the Great Desert?" he asked, "I don't think anyone's ever been beyond the Great Desert."
"Oh," Teddy replied, a little disappointedly.
"But I'll tell you what; I'll ask around. I ain't exactly well traveled, you know? Although I gotta admit, I've done more traveling since you guys got here than I ever did before. Buffy once called me 'worldly', whatever that means." LB laughed.
Teddy laughed along with LB, then asked, "And how is Buffy? Come to think of it, this is the first time I've seen you since the wedding. Did you have a nice honeymoon?"
"It was okay. Getting married is weird. But we're still settling in, you know? It's gonna take time to get used to it."
"I see," said Teddy. He suddenly realized that he wasn't being a very good host. "Would you like something to eat or drink? I think we have some root beer," he said. Root beer was another Octopede invention, but unlike root stew, root beer actually tasted good.
"Not really." LB jumped off the chair and hopped over to where Teddy sat on the couch. He stood and gazed at Teddy with an undecipherable look. Teddy felt a little uncomfortable.
"Hey Buxbin, you mind answering a question?" LB asked.
"Of course not."
"Ever since you guys came here, me and Twiddle-dumb have spent almost every waking hour trying to make your life miserable. So how come you're always tryin' to be so nice to me?" Teddy thought LB looked genuinely confused and even a little concerned. He decided to answer honestly.
"Because I think that deep down, you really aren't a bad person. Trust and respect have to start somewhere. I hope that if I trust and respect you, that someday you'll honor that trust and we can all be friends."
LB looked thoughtful for a minute. However, he quickly regained his uncaring attitude.
"Yeah, well don't hold your breath," he said flippantly.
Teddy smiled. "It's okay LB, I don't expect you to believe in me. But I think it's important for you to know that I believe in you." For some reason LB suddenly started laughing like a hyena. He laughed so hard that he found himself rolling on the floor. When he'd finally pulled himself together enough, he looked up at the confused Iliop.
"Rustbin, do you ever listen to yourself?"
"What do you mean?" Teddy asked. "Of course I do."
"Oh come on! You sound like a motivational speaker or some kind of self-help thingamabob."
"I guess that's just how I am. But you know, I have to be myself."
Suddenly, and for no apparent reason, Teddy started singing slowly.
"I know sometimes it can be hard
The feelings you must hide,
When the people all around you
Don't know who you are inside."
Teddy picked up the tempo as he continued to sing. LB, for his part, started to move in time with the music.
"But if you be yourself,
No one else can do it.
Be yourself,
You'll see there's nothing to it."
Together Teddy and LB danced around the living room.
"Even if you're not Mr. Popularity,
You won't be happy unless you can be,
"You can be yourself."
"What else would I be?" LB sang out as well.
"Be yourself."
"I have to be me!" Teddy exclaimed, and together they finished the song.
"Just one thing that you gotta do,
Above all else to thine own self be true!"
With a final pose and flourish as though they were on stage, Teddy and LB together shouted, "BE YOURSELF!"
From the second floor Gimmick's voice rang out through the house.
"WHAT IS, er, GOING ON DOWN, uh, THERE!!"
"I think that's my cue to be going," said LB, skipping towards the front door.
"Wait! You don't have to leave," said Teddy, looking back over his shoulder with a scowl at the stairs leading up to the second story.
"Yes, I do. Tweeze's probably been waiting for me; I was supposed to have been back a while ago. Of course, I would've been late no matter what." LB laughed his trademark wheezing laughter. "It's so much more fun to watch him get angry," he added.
LB hopped out the door, then turned back to Teddy and said, "Hey, let me ask you one more question."
"What's that?" Teddy asked.
"You're always such a goody-two-shoes. I'm wonderin' if you ever get the urge to beat the crap out of some jerk who desperately deserves it."
Teddy was taken aback by the bluntness of the question, but before he could answer he heard crashing noises coming from the stairs and Gimmick yelling. Teddy sighed.
LB bounded away from the house and called back over his shoulder, "THINK ABOUT IT!!"
Teddy watched LB head back to Tweeg's tower. When he was out of sight he turned back to the inside of the house. He was almost afraid to look.
The sight that greeted him was not pretty. Gimmick and Grubby were both at the bottom of the stairs, tangled in some sort of wire. It seemed like the more they struggled the more tangled they became.
"Teddy!" Gimmick called, "Why don't you, er, uh, go into the kitchen and get some eh, uh, uh, wire cutters. They're in the, uh, bottom, uh, drawer next to the, er, uh, stove."
"Okay, Gimmick," Teddy said as he headed into the kitchen.
"AND HURRY!" Grubby yelled, "THIS THING'S GETTIN' REALLY TIGHT!"
"ALRIGHT, I'M HURRYING!" Teddy yelled back. He frowned as he searched through the kitchen drawer. He finally found the wire cutters and went back into the main room to set Grubby and Gimmick free.
Newton Gimmick, the most famous inventor in Grundo and the owner of the house where Teddy and Grubby were currently living, carefully examined the remains of his latest experiment while Teddy and Grubby looked on.
"Oh, uh, dear. It's, uh, I'm afraid it's not, uh, salvageable."
"What was it?" Teddy asked, curiously picking up pieces of metal.
Gimmick adjusted his glasses. "It was going to be an, er, eh, automatic clothesline."
Gimmick was a Purloon (in other countries called a Human), one of the most common races living in Grundo. He was an older man, at least 50, with thick black-rimmed glasses, a white mustache, and a shiny baldhead surrounded by a ring of white hair. He was a scientist and an inventor, but unfortunately his inventions never seemed to work just right. More often than not they seemed to backfire completely. But Gimmick took it all in stride, because he knew that the greatest inventions often required years of trial and error. And it didn't hurt that he seemed to have serendipitous luck; often his inventions worked in ways that he himself had never dreamed of.
"Well, I'll get the broom so we can start to clean this up," Teddy said. He started to head toward the kitchen when there was a knock at the front door.
"I'LL GET IT!!" Grubby shouted as he raced to the door. Teddy smiled at his friend's childlike attitude.
"It better not be one of those bounders playing another practical joke," Gimmick said threateningly. Teddy looked at Gimmick and felt a strange, sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. Somehow, he felt that something wasn't right.
Grubby threw open the front door.
"What the. ..!" Grubby fell over backwards onto his rump as something blue fell on top of him. Teddy and Gimmick both rushed over to see what it was. It was Old Beanly, the Royal Messenger.
Teddy tried to help Grubby carry Old Beanly to the couch. The aging messenger was obviously hurt, but Teddy had no idea how badly.
"Oh, my!" Gimmick exclaimed, "Er, I'll go and get some, uh, water and the, eh, uh, first aid, uh, kit!"
"What d'ya suppose happened?" Grubby asked nervously as he and Teddy gently laid Old Beanly down.
"I don't know," Teddy said, "but I think we should find out." Teddy leaned down closer to Old Beanly.
"Teddy, I. . ."
"Shh! I think he's trying to say something!" Teddy interrupted Grubby, then leaned in even closer. Old Beanly opened his eyes and looked at Teddy. Then his eyes became unfocused and he spoke so softely that Teddy could barely hear him.
"Gutangs. . . please . . .help . . .king." Just as he finished, his eyes closed and he lost consciousness.
"Old Beanly!" Teddy cried.
"Oh, uh, dear!" Gimmick said, "Here's the er, uh, first aid. Teddy, let me, uh, uh, look at him." Teddy stepped back and Gimmick set about trying to help Old Beanly as Teddy and Grubby watched.
"Is he . . .?" Grubby started to ask, but couldn't finish the question. He swallowed loudly.
"No," Gimmick answered the unasked question, "but he is badly, uh, hurt. I'm afraid I can only do so, uh, much."
"We need to get him to a doctor," Teddy concluded.
"But Teddy, there aren't any doctors around here," Grubby said, sounding panicky.
"The closest, uh, doctor, would be in the, er, elf village," Gimmick answered.
"Okay then, Grubby, you get the airship fired up; I'll get some supplies together. As soon as Gimmick thinks it's safe we'll take Old Beanly to the elf village."
As everyone set about their tasks, Teddy felt the sick feeling in his stomach grow. He considered what Old Beanly had said and thought about King Nogburt and all his friends who lived in Nogburt's castle. Looking out the window toward Tweeg's tower, he remembered the conversation he had just had with LB and the unanswered question LB had left him with.
"Yes," he answered quietly to himself, "I do."
...TO BE CONTINUED
Yes, they sing and dance. It's Teddy Ruxpin - what do you expect?
Slayers is copyright a bunch of other people, and the video series is
distributed in the US by Central Park Media. Teddy Ruxpin was copyright
Alchemy II, created by Ken Forsse.