The Portal

by louloucn

Angel and Cordy admit their love and Groo decides to go back to Pylea. However, as Groo screws up the chant for the portal, Angel and Cordy are accidentally sucked into a portal taking them back in time to relive events of the past.

3. The Portal part III (chapters 13-18)

 

RECAP OF CH. 7-12: Angel and Cordy continued to deceive the gang (except for Giles and Willow) about their relationship until Spike unknowingly caught a glimpse of them. As Willow and Xander got kidnapped by Spike, Cordy and Oz went to their rescue. Meanwhile, Buffy and Angel found Spike, who threatened not only to kill Willow and Xander if Willow didn't finish his love spell for Dru, but also threatened to tell Buffy about Angel and Cordy. Cordy and Oz then caught Willow and Xander in the act and Cordy, like the first time, got impaled by a rebar. Buffy says goodbye to Angel, Xander visits Cordy in the hospital and Cordy forgives him. Later, Angel visits Cordy and the whole gang catches them. Giles then finally finds them the chant for the portal and they return home only to find that Xander and Cordy are married and Cordy's pregnant.

*****************  

Part III

Chapter 13

 

"We're having a baby?" Cordy asked, still reeling from the news.

"We're having a baby!" Xander proclaimed with excitement, with his arms wide open and then grabbing Cordy for a tight hug.

"You're having a baby." Angel exclaimed with no expression on his face at all.

"We're having a baby?" Cordy asked again, not yet believing her ears. "How?"

"Well Cordy, an egg comes out of one of the ovaries and then travels down the fallop…"Xander explained, pretending not to understand.

"No Xander!" Cordy answered as she slaps him on the arm. "What I mean is how can I be having a baby when…"

"….we've been so careful? Cordy, you know what the doctor said, not all birth control methods are 100% effective. Anyways, I thought you were happy about this." Xander asked, kinda of confused with Cordy's attitude.

"Well… I am." Cordy lied. "I guess I'm still overwhelmed by all of this. Are you sure we can handle having a baby?"

"Of course!" Xander replied, as he took both Cordy's hands. "We can handle anything together as Mr. and Mrs. Xander Harris."

~Mrs. Cordelia Harris? Angel thought. The mere utter of those words just pierced into his chest like a knife.

Cordy gasped.

As she looked at her hands, she noticed something that she hadn't before. On her left hand, she saw a wedding band. It was modest and simple but it was as clear as daylight that what Xander had just said wasn't a lie.

"Yes, of course." Cordy chuckled with insincerity. "Of course I can get through everything… with my… husband by my side." ~Xander, my husband?

Xander just smiled.

"And you know, in a few months, not only are we only husband and wife, we're going to be a mommy and daddy to the best boy or girl in the world, aren't we honey?" Xander said as he stroked Cordy's tummy again.

"Umm hmm." Cordy answered as she gave him a little smile.

"So Cordy, are you coming home with me?" Xander asked.

"Home?" Cordy asked, dreading where home exactly was.

"Yeah, it has been a long night with the gang all busy with the demon fighting and I'm * yawn * pretty beat myself. I've got to get up early tomorrow." Xander explained.

"Xander, is it okay that I stay here for a little bit? I just want to say goodnight to Connor and talk to Angel just a little while. I'm not really tired yet." Cordy replied.

"Yeah, okay. But don't stay for too long. I don't want you straining yourself in your condition." Xander answered and then gave her another smile. "It's not good for the baby."

He then gave her a kiss and a long hug.

"Bye Angel!" Xander cried out, as he left the room. "Take her home later okay? Dennis will probably be waiting for her."

~Oh Thank God! Cordy thought to herself. At least she still had Dennis in her life.

Then Xander shut the door and left.

Cordy then turned towards Angel to look at his eyes, unable to think of any words to say to him.

Angel felt the same way.

**************************

"So you're married, huh?" Angel asked. They were both lying on Angel's bed, and facing each other. Angel had reached out his hand to touch the band on Cordy's finger.

"I guess so." Cordy said. "And from what Xander said, I also am carrying a bun in the oven too." She smiled weakly.

"A baby…" Angel sighed. "That's really big Cordy."

"And to think that we thought that things would be so simple once we got back home Angel." Cordy remarked. ~How naïve we were. "Angel, how did this happen? One minute we were going to have our happy ending, where we were just going to be together forever with Connor and now I'm not only married but I'm pregnant as well!"

"I don't know…"Angel admitted. "Maybe something happened when we were in that time warp."

"But Angel, we did everything we could to do to make everything happen the way they did… you almost got killed by Mrs. Post, I got punctured by a rebar…. I mean, what was the point of doing all of that if we were going to come home to this?"

"Cordy, something must have went wrong." Angel explained. "Can you remember anything that you did that was sort of different from the first time?"

"No…" Cordy replied. "I complained and bitched as much as usual, I caught Xander and Willow, I got stabbed, I went into the hospital and then Xander visi…oh God… that can't be it…"Cordy realized as her voice trailed.

"What can't it be?" Angel asked as he wanted to know what she remembered.

"I was… I was in the hospital, and then Xander came to visit me in the hospital. He was all apologetic and was ready to grovel…he was so anxious for me to talk to him….and the first time, I just didn't really look at him, and told him to never talk to me again… but when I saw him this time, I wasn't as mad as I was with him the first time because I knew what was going to happen… I kind of felt sorry for him this time and I just… I just thought that it would have been mature of me to just forgive him and start from scratch with him… but I never, I never thought that we'd get back together… I was so sure that I wouldn't ever have a relationship with him again." Cordy explained. "This is all my fault!"

"Cordy, you don't know for sure." Angel began.

"No Angel! It's my fault! It's my fault that we are stuck here in bizarro land and we can't… we can't be together. It's because of me that we can't have our life together." Cordy insisted as the tears began to form.

"Cordy, listen to me." Angel said, he tried to wipe away her tears. "This wasn't your fault. It's not yours and it's not mine. We didn't choose to be sent back. But it happened and now here we are."

"What do you mean?" Cordy asked, surprised by Angel's calmness.

"I mean, what's done is done and we're here now so…" Angel explained.

"So I'm supposed to stay married to Xander?" Cordy answered, completely baffled by Angel's logic. "Is that it?"

"Cordy, Xander's a good guy. I mean, he can be stubborn and he overreacts a lot, but all in all he's a good guy. He's probably a really good husband to you in this world." Angel explained.

"What are you trying to say Angel? That since Xander is a good guy, I should just keep being married to him, even though I love someone else?" Cordy asked, as she couldn't even believe what Angel was saying to her. "Is this your way of saying that you don't love me anymore?"

"Cordy, how could you even think that?" Angel replied, as he looked deeply into her beautiful eyes. "Of course I love you. I love you so much it hurts."

"Well if you love me so much, then why are you so quick to push me into another man's arms? Why do you keep on insisting that I keep on being Mrs. Alexander Harris?" Cordy demanded.

~I can't even stand those words. "I just thought that… umm…I just…" Angel attempted to speak as he head was down.

"What Angel what?" Cordy asked softly, as she lifted his head up with her finger.

"You're having his baby, Cordy." Angel replied slowly. "You're going to have your own baby. Do you know how big that is? I know that you've always wanted to have kids Cordy…"

"So? What does that have to do with…" Cordy answered, still not getting what he was talking about.

"Well, now here's your chance. Here's your chance to have all those kids that you've been dreaming about…Xander can give you that. And if you stayed with me, I'd be robbing you of that gift. And I don't know if I could live with that." Angel explained.

"Angel, that's not important to me." Cordy replied. "Yes, it'd be so wonderful to be able to make love to you, but it's doesn't matter to me if I can't be with you. So, I can't have your child Angel, that I regret, but don't you remember that we do have a child… we have Connor" Cordy continued. "Our sweet little guy. And even though I didn't give birth to him, I consider him my own flesh and blood…He's my son."

"But…"Angel argued.

"No buts here mister." Cordy answered as she put a finger up to his lips to stop him. "I want to be with you… no one else. This is my chance to take, my decision, and you can't stop me."

Angel smiled.

"You know how stubborn and hardheaded I can be when I want something." Cordy answered as she smiled back. "And I want you. I want to be with you."

Angel then wrapped his arms around her and gave her a kiss and then broke away.

"I don't know if that's possible in this world… you're carrying Xander's baby." Angel explained. "We have no idea what else is different about this world."

"Then I guess we'll just have to find out, wont we?" Cordy answered.

*****************************

"Hey where's Fred and Gunn? I thought that they were supposed to be in the office a while ago." Cordy asked, as she entered Wes' office.

"They are probably off having breakfast or making out somewhere." Wes answered, as Cordy walked into the office.

"Umm… are you at all… bothered by this?" Cordy asked, trying to fish for answers.

"No, not at all. Why wouldn't I be happy that my best friend has a girlfriend." Wes replied. "I'm mean who could resist such a beautiful, caring, sweet, delicate…"

Cordy didn't have to listen to the rest. She was a little glad that Wes's love for Fred had remained unchanged, despite the fact that she was saddened that Wes was so hurt over Wes and Fred, but he wouldn't admit it.

"Yeah, I get the picture." Cordy answered.

Then Wesley went on with his work, as Cordy started pacing back and forth around the room.

"Cordy," Wesley said, as he looked up to her. "Is there anything I can do for you?"

"Who me? Oh no, I don't need anythi…"Cordy replied quickly, just as Angel walked in the room. "Oh Angel, you're here." As she pushed him in and quickly closed the door.

Wesley completely confused with Cordy's odd behaviour then asked, "What are you doing?"

"Wesley, we have something to tell you and I'm not really sure how you'll take it…" Cordy explained.

"Oh Cordy…"Wesley replied. "I'm sure whatever you have to tell me isn't such a big deal."

"Uh… I don't know… this is sort of big. " Cordy replied.

*************************

Then Cordy began to tell the tale. From the Groo debacle, to the swirly bright hole thingy, to the going into the past thing… everything. She wasn't sure how Wes was taking it since he didn't say a word since she started to talk. She tried to read the expression on his face but… nothing.

"So that pretty much brings you up to date." Cordy finshed. "I know it sounds so unbelievable and crazy and you probably think that we're nuts but if you could…"

"I believe you." Wes replied point blank.

"You what?" Cordy exclaimed.

"Cordy, I believe you." Wes replied again.

"I'm sorry Wes, I'm just a little surprised that's all." Cordy admitted. "I mean, every time we've told our story, it takes them awhile to take it all in, nevertheless actually believe us."

"I'm not like everybody." Wes answered. "Cordy, we've been through so much with each other, with apocalypses and demons and so on and so on. I mean, we're not like normal people. So no, the idea of time travel doesn't really surprise me."

"So Wes, is there any way you can help us?"Angel asked.

"I'll do my best." Wes answered.

Then Angel looked at Cordy.

"Are you sure you don't want to stay here, because Cordy, it could be a good li.."Angel asked again.

"No. No Angel. I want to go home. Our home. A place where we can be together."Cordy replied, with all the faith in the world. "So Wes, do you know what we can do?" as she looked at Wes.

"Well, without some further research, it's hard to say, but it seems to me that you two have to go back in time and rewrite it."Wes replied.

"Oh that's easy. All we have to do is do the chant again,"Angel replied with relief, as he went to his leather coat to fetch the piece of paper that Giles gave them. "We just do the chant and then…and then…"

"What's wrong?" Cordy asked, as she saw Angel's expression change.

"It's gone." Angel replied.

"It can't be gone." Cordy answered back, not believing him. "Are you sure that you didn't put it in your pants."

"Cordy, it's GONE." Angel said, realizing the bind that they had gotten into.

****************

Chapter 14

 

"It's got to be here!" Cordy declared. "It just has to be!" Cordy and Wes were frantically looking through Cordy's car, practically taking the car apart. Angel stayed behind in the hotel since it was still daylight.

"Cordy, it's not here." Wes said calmly.

"It has to be here! It just HAS to be!" Cordy exclaimed, not willing to stop searching.

"Cordy, Cordy, CORDY!" Wes insisted, trying to pull her away from the car. "It's not here!"

"But Wes, Wes, "as Cordy's eyes filled with tears. "How are we going to get home?" then Cordy put her arms around Wes for comfort.

"It's gonna be okay." Wes assured her. "Everything's gonna be fine."

********************

As Angel saw Cordy and Wes come into the lobby, he knew that they weren't able to find the chant. 

"What's wrong with Cordy?" Fred asked, as she ran towards Cordy.

"Oh I'll be fine." Cordy lied. "I'm just a little tired."

"Are you sure?" Fred asked again.

"She'll be fine." Wes assured her. "She can go and rest in my office. Uh Angel? Could I talk to you for a moment?"

"Yeah sure." Angel replied, as all three of them walked into the office and shut the door.

"We couldn't find it." Wes explained.

"I know." Angel replied. "I guess it didn't go through the portal like that time in Pylea…"

"…with the magic book." Wes finished his sentence.

"Yeah." Angel answered, remembering the incident. 

"Wes," Cordy began to speak, looking up at him. "How did I end up marrying Xander?"

"Well, from what I remember, when I first came to Sunnydale, you two had broken up. But you also remain friends. However, Xander asked you to prom and then you started seeing him again. You two were so inseparable that when you decided to go to LA to pursue your acting career, he went with you." Wes explained. " But when that didn't pan out, you and Xander accidentally met up with Angel, I think at a party if I remember it correctly and then with Doyle, you started Angel investigations. However, things started to go a little sour when Doyle started having feelings for you. And when he kissed you before he died, and gave you the visions, Xander realized how much you meant to him and proposed. And now you've been married for about 2 years now."

Cordy sat there as she listened to Wes' retelling. It seemed so strange to her how much things were so different in this world, yet still remained the same. She kept thinking about her talk with Xander in the hospital and how that one single event changed the course of her life completely. She had only wanted to take pity on him. She had only wanted to make amends and make peace with him. She had remembered how bitter she had been after the breakup and how miserable she was. How could she have known that the bitterness and the hurt was supposed to happen. That all of the pain that had before leaving Sunnydale was a good thing since it led to better things. It led to Angel. It just didn't seem fair.

"So Wes, what do you suggest we do now, since we don't have the chant for the portal?" Cordy asked.

"Well, I think I will do some research for the chant while you two keep calm and pretend that nothing's wrong. I mean, we wouldn't want to alarm the others at this point." Wes explained. He looked at Cordy and tried to manage a smile. "Don't worry. I'll figure something out."

"Thanks Wes." Cordy replied, as she offered a weak smile back.

"Thank you too Wes." Angel replied as well.

Cordy then walked over to Angel, put her arms around him and gave him a kiss. Then she broke away without saying a word, glanced back at him and walked out of the room.

Wes looked at the whole scene and saw Angel's face falling.

"You really love her don't you?" Wes asked.

"I love her…"Angel answered simply. "Wes, can I ask you something?"

"What?" Wes asked.

"Did I… I mean, in this world, the Angel that you know… Did he love Cordy too?" Angel asked.

"Yes…he would do anything to protect her." Wes responded.

************************

The past few days had been so unusual. It was odd enough being in the past and replaying everything that had happened, but Cordy never suspected that living in the present would be even harder.

She wasn't used to being a wife. She wasn't used to doing all of those housewifey chores around the house, liking making the breakfast, taking care of the house and waiting up for Xander to come home from work. I mean, she was used to taking care of herself, but know being a 'wife', all of those things she had done before had a new burden. And she was used to living with someone because she had lived with Angel when they were stuck in the past. But this time, it was just different. All of those quirks that one was supposed to know about your husband were unknown to her so when he did anything out of the ordinary, it took her by surprise, while Xander just looked at her, wondering what was wrong. And the fact of the matter is, she didn't love him.

She knew Xander was a great guy and she appreciated that he was so caring and affectionate, but she felt guilty every time he would kiss her, touch her, tried to intimate with her. It was so hard because every time Xander would do anything, Cordy would think about Angel. This made her feel even more guilty and sorry that she couldn't feel anything for her husband except for friendship.

Cordy was sitting idly by the desk, staring into space when Fred appeared out of nowhere. 

"What are you daydreaming about?" Fred asked with a smile.

"Oh nothing." Cordy said as she snapped back to reality.

"Oh come on…you've got a look on your face." Fred insisted. "It must have been a nice dream."

"I wasn't thinking about anything!" Cordy vowed.

"No, I know that look! I get the same look on my face whenever I think of Charles. How brave, sweet, charming he is * sigh *" Fred said dreamily. "You probably think the same way about Xander, don't you?"

"Yeah…" Cordy lied, as she watched Angel holding Connor, as he walked down the stairs to the lobby.

"Isn't it wonderful to be in love! I mean…."Fred babbled.

Cordy couldn't listen to a word that Fred was saying because she was so busy looking at Angel. As they locked eyes on each other, they looked at each other with such sadness because of the love that they felt but could never reveal.

"Hey, is that a new necklace?" Fred asked.

"What?" Cordy asked back.

"Your locket silly! I've never seen it before." Fred explained.

Cordy look down and there it was. The heart locket that Angel had given her. She smiled as she remembered.

"Oh, I just bought it." Cordy said simply. As she looked at it again, it gave her a little hope that somehow they would get through this.

"Hey." Angel said, as he approached them.

"Yeah, hey." Fred replied. "How's Connor?" as she looked at the baby.

"He's fine." Angel answered. "Do you want to hold him Fred?"

"Sure!" Fred exclaimed happily as she carefully took Connor out of Angel's arms and started to pace around the room.

As she left Cordy and Angel alone, Angel then whispered to her. "Are you okay?"

"No. It's been driving me crazy." Cordy whispered back. "I mean, I really care for Xander, I really do, but I don't know how long I can take it living like this, away from you. And the morning sickness. Not good at all. I never knew how hard it was being pregnant. My mood is all over the place."

"Just hang on a little longer." Angel urged as he reached out his hand to touch hers.

"But Angel, I don't know if I can." Cordy admitted. 

"You have to!" Angel insisted.

"I will. Only for you." Cordy assured him.

Angel then grasped her hand a little harder and gave it a squeeze. Then, he just looked in her eyes and stared at her. He smiled.

"Cordy?" Xander called out as he entered the hotel.

Angel then immediately dropped Cordy's hand in a panic.

"I'm here." Cordy cried out.

"Oh! Hi honey!" Xander said happily as he gathered Cordy in his arms and gave her a kiss. "Guess what I got?"

"What?" Cordy asked.

"Look! Isn't it the cutest?" Xander then held up a little blue infant jammies. "I was going home from work, when I passed this baby store and I couldn't help think of Xander Jr."

"We don't know if it's a boy yet." Cordy corrected him.

"Well, if it's a girl, we can call it Cordy or even Alexandra! What do you think?"

"Uh I don't know." Cordy said as she shook her head.

"Oh it's alright. We have tons of time to figure the baby's name." Xander replied. "So Angel, what do think is a good name for the baby?"

"I like Cordelia." Angel replied, as he gazed at Cordy. "It'll have a beautiful name just like her mother."

"See?" Xander exclaimed, motioning to Cordy. "He likes the idea of Cordy Jr. too!"

He then rubbed Cordy's arm affectionately as he continued to hold her.

As Angel watched this, it became increasingly hard to look at until he just had to get up and walk away.

Cordy just stood there helplessly as her beloved walked away and she was forced to continue to smile with Xander still holding her in his arms. All she wanted to do was to run out of Xander's arms and run to Angel, but she just continued to stand there, frozen. 

"Are you okay sweetie?" Xander asked as he looked at Cordy's distraught expression.

"Is the morning sickness still getting to you?"

"I'm feeling a little sick right now. But I'll be okay." Cordy replied trying to keep a pleasant disposition. ~ I mean, I just want to die right now, but I'll be fine. Oh Angel, is there any hope left? Do we even have a chance in hell to be toget…

"EUREKA!" Wes cried out of nowhere. "I've found it!"

****************

Chapter 15

 

Angel and Cordy literally wanted to jump at the thought. They quickly glanced at each other.

"What are you talking about Wes?" Xander asked, perplexed by the sudden outburst.

"What?…Uh…Oh…"Wes stammered, realizing what he done. "I just… um… figured out today's word jumble."

"Wow…um hmm." Xander answered, as he whispered in Cordy's ear. "I guess some people get real excited over word jumbles."

"Yeah." Cordy replied, but had a huge smile on her face.

"What so funny?" Xander asked. "Why are you smiling like that?"

"Oh nothing, I'm just suddenly happy I guess." Cordy replied simply, as she glanced over Xander's shoulder to see Angel smiling back at her.

********************

It wasn't until nightfall that Angel or Cordy even tried to approach Wesley. Fred and Gunn had gone on a date and Xander, after much persistence from Cordy, decided to go home earlier. Throughout the hotel, it was completely silent and there was no one left except for Wes, Angel and Cordy.

"So Wes, have you really figured out how to get us home?" Cordy asked suddenly, unable to keep her silence any longer.

"Yes Cordy, I've figured out a way to get you to two home." Wes replied, but then his face got all serious. "But, I must warn you two that this is somewhat risky and…"

"I don't care Wes." Cordy retorted. "I don't think I can stay like this. If this is our only chance out of here, then I'll take it."

"Are you sure Cordy?" Angel asked. "Because if it's risky and all, then we can…"

"What? Angel, what?" Cordy asked. "Live our whole lives just basically giving each other quick glances from opposite sides of the room, having a stolen moment when no one's looking, basically trying to hide from what you and I both know in our hearts: that we love each other? I can't, I refuse to live like that." She then took Angel's hands in hers. "We have to take this chance Angel. It's our only hope, okay?"

Angel just nodded, as he knew deep inside that she was right. 

Angel then turned his attention to Wes. "So can you explain to your plan?"

"Well, first of all, I wasn't able to find that chant that you guys used the first time." Wes began. "I tried, I really did, but seems as if any trace of it had completely disappeared. Instead, I found an alternate spell. It is from a later time period, but it has the same capabilities as the other chant did, I believe."

"How does it work Wes?" Cordy asked.

"With this." Wes answered. He then held up a ring. It was an antique ring. The band was very detailed and intricate in design. Although at first glance you would think that the gem in the middle of it was a sapphire, at a closer inspection, one could see a whirlwind and a bright light to it, not unlike the portal that they had traveled in.

"Where did you get this?" Cordy gasped. She had never seen anything like it.

"I have my ways." Wes replied mysteriously. "Unlike the previous chant, you will need this ring to travel back through time as well as the words to the spell. I suggest you memorize the lines, so that we can avoid the mishap we had before."

"Do we need something to bind us together?" Angel asked.

"No, all you need is for one of you to wear the ring, then you hold hands, recite the spell and instantly you will be transported back through time." Wes explained. "However, this ring will not be able to send you back to the exact time and place you were previously."

"Then how are we able to undo the damage we had done?" Angel asked, a little confused.

"That's the beauty of these spells." Wes replied. "It doesn't matter where it takes you, because all you have to do is to go back, let time run its course as it once was, and everything will back to the way you remembered. From what I recall from your story, you had relived the fundamental events of the time until Cordy forgave Xander, right?"

Cordy shook her head.

"Well, this is exactly what you do now. The spell will automatically send you back to a random moment in time where you two once again will experience past events. However, you must relive the most significant moment of that period with everything happening in exactly the same way as you remembered before you will be able to, not only rewrite time again, but also go back to the present." Wes explains further. Unfortunately, this new spell has its drawbacks. First, without reliving the moment, you will never be able to go back to the present. You will stay there, completely trapped in the past. Secondly, unlike the old spell where you can come and go as you please, once the ring emulates its light, that will be your only chance. There is no replays. You either leave when the light goes or get stuck in the past once again. So what I suggest is this time around, be even more careful with what you say or do and be precise with the things that you do. It has to be surgical this time. You only have one shot at this. Last but not least, even after you have done all of this, you still can't be certain that everything will be fine until you've safety returned to the future. " Wes said sadly. " I know that there are so many restrictions this time, but…"

"No, it's fine Wes. At least you have given us our chance. We have it now and we'll succeed." Cordy said firmly. She then went to hug Wes. "Thank you."

Wes smiled. 

Angel then took his turn to give Wes a hug. "Thank you too."

********************

Angel and Cordy stood silently at the crib beside them. They watched as Connor was sleeping soundly.

"Have you ever seen anything as beautiful as this?" Cordy asked as she lightly touched Connor's cheek.

"Never." Angel replied.

"Angel?" Cordy asked.

"Yes, Cordy?" Angel answered.

"You know, I would understand if you don't want to go back." Cordy exclaimed. "I mean, you have Connor and you're his father. I don't want you leaving all of this when you can be with your son."

"Cordy, I want to go back." Angel replied reassuringly. 

"How can I not take the chance if I know that there is hope that somewhere, some time, we can live our life together with Connor as a family? Anyways, I'm never leaving you."

Cordy smiled and gave him a kiss. She then turned back to the crib and whispered, "I'll miss you so much sweetie, but mommy and daddy have to leave you again. We don't want to but always remember that we love you so very much and we'll always be proud of our little boy." She then lightly kissed Connor on the cheek.

"I love you so much my little guy. I promise you that someday we'll see each other again." Angel then kissed Connor goodbye.

"Are you sure that we'll see our son again?" Cordy asked.

"I promise." Angel replied as he pulled her closer to him.

************************

"Are you guys ready?" Wes replied as he saw Angel and Cordy walked down the stairs hand in hand.

"We're ready." Angel answered. He then hugged Wes.

"Please watch over Connor." Angel said.

"I'll protect him with all of my life." Wes replied.

Cordy then took her turn to hug Wes. "I'll never forget what you have done for us, Wes. I'll miss you." She then put on the ring. As it went on her finger, the ring shrunk so that it would fit perfectly around the contours of her finger.

"I'll miss you too." Wes agreed. "Now remember, please be cautious and wary of what you do there and remember your purpose. And when the ring lights up, that is your cue to leave. Be careful. Angel, do you remember the words?"

"Yes…"Angel replied, as he took Cordy's hands in his. "Are you ready?"

"I've never been more ready in my life." Cordy replied with so much assurance.

"And to think that we thought we would never time travel again." Angel said with a smile. "It's funny how life goes."

"Yeah, isn't it?" Cordy agreed. "Now recite the lines, big guy, and get it over with."

"Okay…dheortek utao…"Angel recited. As he said the words, the ring started to beam out a bright light. Cordy gasped. "okel noewatun!"

The bright light that shone from the ring burst and completely surrounded them and once more, the light blinded the both of them.

WHOOSH!

***************************

They finally opened their eyes. They were standing in the middle of the street as a car was about to approached them.

"Oh God Angel!" Cordy screamed.

Angel then grabbed Cordy, ran and jumped away from the oncoming traffic. They both landed with a thunk onto the grass beside the street. 

"Are you okay Cordy?" Angel asked as he was on top of her.

"I'm fine. Nothing's broken, I think." Cordy answered.

"Your long hair is back." Angel said happily as he touched the tendrils of her hair.

"And you're even more paler than ever." Cordy said back mockingly.

"Ha ha. That's real funny Cordy." Angel replied as he helped Cordy up. "So what day do you think it is?"

"I don't know. It's the middle of the night Angel." Cordy answered. "There's no one around."

Angel then searched through his pockets out of habit. He could have sworn that there was something in pocket. And then he managed to fish out of his pocket a key.

"What's that key for?" Cordy asked.

"Oh my gosh, this is the key to my apartment!" Angel answered. "I guess we went back a little further than the last time."

"You know, I've never seen your apartment before." Cordy admitted.

"It was okay." Angel replied. "So… I guess I should take you home now."

"Angel," Cordy started as she put her arms around him again. "It's late. There is no one around. Can't I stay with you tonight?"

"Cordy, I want to so much," Angel replied with a sigh. "But we have to be more careful this ti…"

"Shussh." Cordy said as she put her finger to his lips. "I just want to stay over tonight. One night, Angel. And tomorrow, we'll figure everything out and we'll pretend again. But for tonight, can't we just be ourselves and forget everything else. I.. just want to be with you." She then looked up into his eyes with a pout.

"Okay." Angel replied. "Just for tonight." 

***************************

"So what do you think?" Angel asked.

"It's a lot whiter than I expected." Cordy asked. "But it's nice."

They were both lying in bed, just staring at each other.

"You know how much I love just being here like this." Cordy said. "It makes me feel like nothing is any different. Like we're still in your room the night when you first told me you loved me and it felt like anything was possible. That tomorrow held so much promise."

"It can still be that way Cordy." Angel replied, touching lovingly her arm. "There's always hope tomorrow."

"I really hope so Angel. You know what I wish for?" Cordy asked.

"Jude Law?" Angel answered teasingly.

"No, besides that. Although that doesn't mean I'm waiting for that present someday." Cordy said, as sat up and now straddled Angel on the bed.

"I don't know… maybe you should remind me." Angel said coyly.

Cordy then dipped down to whisper in his ear. "I wish I had some Pop Rocks."

Angel smiled.

"Yeah, I miss those Pop Rocks too." Angel admitted. "I wish I had discovered them earlier… but you know, we can do other things."

"What kind of things?" Cordy asked, very interested in what he had to say.

"These things." Angel said, as he grabbed her face, reached himself up so that he could meet her lips and kissed her passionately. 

"Angel…I've missed you." Cordy said since she hadn't kissed him in a long time.

"I've missed you too." Angel replied he pulled her down to him.

********************

Cordy felt a sense of relief and content as she still laid nestled in Angel's arms. She had missed being like this. It just felt so good and so right. She just held on tighter as she wanted to savour this moment for a little while longer. ~If only this could last forever…

"Hi." Angel said as he opened his eyes and kissed her forehead.

"Hi…"Cordy said. "I wish I could stay in bed forever."

"Yeah, I know." Angel agreed. "But you know, we're gonna have to get up eventually."

"No…" Cordy insisted. "I don't want to."

* knock, knock *

They both looked at each other in a panic.

"Cordy, go hide!" Angel said in a whisper. "Go and hide in the bathroom and I'll answer the door, okay?"

Cordy gave Angel a quick kiss and then ran as quickly in the bathroom.

~Okay.. this is fine…we'll be okay. Angel thought to himself.

"Hold on." Angel called out.

He opened the door. There stood a worried Buffy.

"Hey. Is everything okay?" Angel asked.

"That's what I was gonna ask you. You're okay, right?" Buffy asked.

"Sure. I..I'm fine." Angel answered, gesturing her to come in. "What's up?" He was still confused with the way that Buffy was acting.

"Um... I-I had this... dream that Drusilla was alive." Buffy replied.

With those words, the colour began to drain from Angel's face.

***************

Chapter 16

 

As Buffy uttered those words. Angel had realized where in time the ring had brought them. However, he tried to retain his composure so that Buffy would not be able to notice that anything was wrong with him. He then looked down and noticed that he had no shirt on. He immediately felt self conscious and quickly pulled on a white t-shirt.

"What happened?" Angel asked, wondering if his ears had deceived him.

"Druscilla. She killed you. Right in front of me." Buffy explained, clearly frazzled.

"It was just a dream. It wasn't real." Angel replied.

"But it felt so real." Buffy answered back, her worry not subsiding.

"It wasn't. I'm right here." Angel replied. As he said those words of comfort, he tried to focus and remind himself of the Angel he used to be. The Angel that loved Buffy. He then touched her cheek.

"Angel, th-this happened before. The dreams that I had about the Master, they came true." Buffy argued.

"Still, not every dream you have comes true." Angel replied. As he hear the words that he uttered, he couldn't help but think of Cordy and a thought of doubt entered his mind, wondering if the dream he had wanted with Cordy would ever come true. However, his head snapped back into focus once more to Buffy. "I mean, what else did you dream last night? Can you remember?"

"I dreamt... I dreamt that Giles and I opened an office supply warehouse in Vegas." Buffy answered with a feeling of embarrassment.

"See my point?" Angel replied.

"Yeah, I-I do, but... what if Drusilla is alive? We never saw her body." Buffy retorted.

"She's not." Angel lied, but tried to keep Buffy reassured. " But even if she was, we'd deal."

"W-w-what if she is...

Angel then impulsively grabbed her and kissed her. Partly just to distract her from her thoughts of Druscilla but also to convince her and himself that he loved her. He needed desperately to feel exactly how he felt all those years ago, or the act would never be successful.

"What if what?" Angel asked.

"I'm sorry. Were we talking?" Buffy whispered.

Angel then once again leaned over to kiss her again. ~Focus, Angel, focus! You love this girl, remember? Try to remember the feelings that you once felt, or she'll never buy it.

Then Buffy suddenly broke away.

"I'm sorry. I, um... I-I have to go to school." Buffy explained quickly, trying to resist temptation.

"I know." Angel replied.

~Concentrate Angel…remember what you did.

Then Angel impulsively took Buffy into his arms and started to kiss her passionately.

"Oh, God, you feel..." Buffy moaned.

As Buffy began to get lost in her emotions, Angel was struggling with another battle. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't stop thinking of Cordy. Every time his mind wandered to Cordy, he tried even harder to please Buffy and kissed her even harder.

~ Just remember… this is for Cordy's sake…you have to start believing that you still love Buffy damnit! Angel then broke away and remembered what he had asked her that day.

"You still haven't told me what you wanted for your birthday." Angel asked.

"Surprise me." Buffy replied coyly and smiled.

"I will." Angel replied as he attempted to smile back.

Buffy then held Angel close to her. "This is nice. I like seeing you first thing in the 

morning."

Angel tried not show that he wasn't uncomfortable at the suggestion.

"It's bedtime for me." Angel replied. Yeah, he was tired after spending the whole night talking endlessly with Cordy, trying to savour the only moment they could have with each other. He hardly did get any sleep last night.

"Well, then I like seeing you at bedtime." Buffy replied suggestively, as Angel tried not to squirm. " Um... Um, heh... Y-you know what I mean."

"I think so. What do you mean?" Angel asked impulsively. ~Oh God, you don't want to know what it means!

"I like seeing you. The part at the end of the night where we say good- bye... It's getting harder." Buffy explained shyly.

"Yeah. It is." Angel replied as he tried to put himself into the mindset that his former self had. He remembered how hard it was to contain himself with Buffy. But now, it was getting harder to pretend, since in his heart, it was now Cordy that he found hard to resist.

"Well…I better get to school then or I'll never make it to school." Buffy exclaimed, as she back away towards the door. "I'll see you later." With that, she softly kissed Angel, and walked out the door.

As Angel closed the door and once he knew that Buffy was gone, he then let out a huge sigh of relief that the encounter was finally over and that he didn't have to pretend for much longer. It was hard encountering Buffy at seventeen when they were both hiding their feelings from each other and playing this game of 'will they or won't they?' but seeing Buffy at sixteen was even harder because Buffy was still open about their relationship and was anxious to take their relationship to the next level, even more naïve to the consequences that would lie ahead.

"Is Buffy gone yet?" Cordy cried out from inside the bathroom.

"Yeah, she's gone." Angel replied, anxious to see his beloved.

Cordy slowly walked out of the bathroom. "I wasn't really sure if she really left because I stayed put this time and I didn't hear a thing. Well, maybe because I didn't really want to listen, and especially see what was going on. The last time, I saw way too much than I should have seen."

"I'm sorry Cordy." Angel replied sadly. "I guess that's the price we pay for traveling back into the past. You encountered your past loves and those whom you used to love."

Cordy then got closer to Angel and held him very tightly. "Are you sure you don't love Buffy anymore?"

"Yeah, I'm sure. Now Cordy, I know this is the part that you hate the most, but I think you have to go to school." Angel added.

"Oh God, school again!" Cordy groaned. "When does it ever end?"

"When we get out of here. I promise. After this, you'll only be setting foot into a school for parent-teacher interviews, okay?"

"Thank God! Now I got to sneak into my house to get a Queen C outfit together" Cordy sighed, and then she looked at Angel. "So, I guess this is when we go our separate ways."

"Yeah…"Angel replied. ~Why didn't I see Cordy more often in the past? "We'll get through this together okay?"

"Okay."Cordy answered. "Thank you for the best night Angel. It's definitely going to be awhile until I can kiss you like this.." with that she quickly pulled him closer and kissed him with all the passion she had in her heart. 

"I love you." Cordy said simply.

"I love you." Angel said back.

She then broke away from Angel, as she attempted to back away towards the door. 

Although she had made it to the door, Angel still held onto her hand as she pulled away. She looked at him. He looked back, knowing that she had to go now. Finally he slowly let go and she was gone.

******************************

Cordy, with much reluctance, walked towards her locker. From her body language, it seemed as if she was on a death march as her back was slightly hunch backed and she walked as slow as possible to delay the stop at the locker. Finally, she reached her old locker and opened it with a sigh.

"So... Buffy's party." Xander said suddenly as he crept up behind her. Cordy slightly jumped at the sudden appearance of Xander. ~Buffy's party? So I guess she's having a party. 

"Buffy's party?" Cordy asked, then she mentally put herself in Queen C mode. "Well, just because she's Miss Save-The-World and everything, you have to make a big deal?" attempting to sound as much as her former self as possible. "I have to cook! And everything." ~Why did you say that? You know you don't cook!

"You're cooking?" Xander exclaimed with much confusion.

"Well… uh… I'm chips and dips girl." Cordy explained, trying to cover her tracks.

" Horrors! All that opening and stirring." Xander teased.

"And shopping and carrying." Cordy added.

"Um, so, uh... You're going, and, and, and I'm going. Should... we maybe... go?" Xander suggested.

"Why?" Cordy asked, with the most snotty tone she could imply.

" I dunno. This... thing with us, despite our better judgment, it keeps happening. Maybe we should just admit that we're dating." Xander explained.

~So we were having a thing at the time…Cordy thought to herself. I know this conversation is familiar, but I just can't put my finger on when…. But I do remember groping… I guess that's a start.

"Groping in a broom closet isn't dating. You don't call it a date until the guy spends money." Cordy replied, still trying to keep up her rich bitch act up.

"Fine. I'll spend, then we'll grope. Whatever. I just think it's some kind of whacked that we feel we have to hide it from all our friends." Xander explained.

"Well, of course *you* wanna tell everybody. You have nothing to be ashamed of. I, on the other hand, have *everything* to be ashamed of." Although she knew that what she said would hurt Xander a lot, but she knew that it would exactly be the type of thing Cordelia would say.

"You know what? 'Nuff said. Forget it. It must've been my multiple- personality guy talking. I call him Idiot Jed, glutton for punishment." Xander, clearly pissed, just turned his head and walked off.

Cordy suddenly felt guilty for treating Xander so badly, but what could she do. She had to act up the rich bitch angle and milk it for all it's worth. I mean, the last time she felt sorry for Xander, she ended up married to him and having his child. ~You just have to stay tough here. Cordy thought to herself. You've got to do pull yourself together and not be weak. No weakness! 

Cordy then walked down the hall and saw Xander talking Giles. Since she didn't want to get into another fight with Xander, she snucked behind a couple of lockers and decided to eavesdrop on their conversation. Maybe it would help her figure out where in time she had exactly fell into. She knew the date, that's for sure, but she couldn't figure out what the significance of it was. It was on the tip of her tongue, but she she just couldn't remember it…. Maybe they could shed some life on the matter.

"…Is everything in order for the party?" Giles asked Xander.

"Absolutely. You ready to get down, you funky party weasel?" Xander asked.

~Funky party weasel? Cordy thought. ~Not exactly the term to describe Giles.

Then she saw Buffy and Jenny approaching them ~Jenny! Cordy gasped. It had been so long since she had seen her… It was way too errie to see someone when you know that they died.

"Here comes Buffy." Giles said quickly. "Now remember: discretion is the better part of valor."

"You coulda just said, 'shh!' God, are all you Brits such drama queens?" Xander exclaimed in frustration.

~I can't believe that I actually agreed with Xander! Cordy thought to herself, as she remembered how rarely did she ever fully agree with Xander. ~Yeah, why do Brits keep making everything so complicated?

"Buffy," Xander said, as Buffy got near him. " I feel a pre-birthday spanking coming on."

~Birthday? Cordy asked herself. ~Oh my God! It's Buffy's birthday. As she began to put the pieces together, she realized that she wasn't dreaming. It was Buffy's birthday, but not only that, it was the birthday. THE birthday that would change everything.

**********************

It was very hard to continue going through the day as Cordy's mind kept being totally distracted with what she knew. Tomorrow was going to be Buffy's 17th Birthday. It was the day when the whole gang were supposed to make a surprise party for Buffy. However, things got all weird or something like that. But what plagued her mind was not that the party didn't go as expected. It was what happened after the party. From what she vaguely remembered, it was the night that Angel and Buffy couldn't resist each other anymore. It was the day that Angel made love to Buffy. It was the day he had gotten perfect happiness and turned back into Angelus.

All of these thoughts just kept swarming through her mind, and although she wanted it to stop, for all of these things to stop plaguing her, it didn't help. All she could see was Buffy under Angel and the moaning and the…Oh God. She couldn't take it anymore.

Once school ended, she ran immediately towards Angel's apartment. She didn't care about Xander, Buffy or anyone finding out about her and Angel. All she cared about was Angel and she desperately needed him now. More than ever.

Cordy then frantically knocked the door. * knock, knock, knock *

Angel opened the door and was clearly surprised by Cordy's presence. "Cordy, what are you doing here?"

"I had to see you." Cordy replied, with a look of utter worry on her face.

"But I thought that we agreed that this time we'd be careful. That we'd do things right this time and by the book, which means that we can't see each other and…"Angel exclaimed.

"But that was before I knew!" Cordy blurted out. "It was before I knew it was Buffy's birthday!"

Angel looked at her, knowing exactly what she was talking about and feared.

"It's going to be okay." Angel answered calmly as he put his hands on Cordy's shoulders.

"It's not going to be fine!" Cordy insisted. "In like less than 36 hours from now, not only will we be having Buffy's surprise birthday bash, but … but you and her…" She couldn't even say the words.

"I know… I know." Angel replied with a sad tone.

"Why did this stupid ring have to bring us back here, here out of any time period?" Cordy asked, as she angrily glared at the ring, wanting to rip the ring from her finger.

"Cordy," Angel began, as he pulled her closer to him. "Everything is going to be okay. I promise."

"How can you be so calm?" Cordy asked. "Don't you know what's going to happen to you? You're going to lose your soul!"

"Cordy, you have to trust me…everything is going to be fine I mean, we've gotten this far. Cordy, I promise that I'll find a way." Angel replied as he held on to her now, kissing her head to comfort her.

"But Angel…" Cordy whispered, as her head rested on his chest. "How can we…"

"Cordy, I'll find a way." Angel replied, as he closed his eyes and the wheels began to turn in his head.

**************

Chapter 17

The day had been gone by so very slowly for Cordy. The knowledge of what was going to happen was eating her up from the inside. Though the first time around she had only cared about what she wore and Xander keeping his hands off of her, this time, she was dreading the end of the day, as it was approaching quickly. She wanted so badly to wake up from this nightmare, to open her eyes and find herself safe at home with Angel and Connor, but every time she tried to pinch herself, to wake herself, she was still in the same place, with nothing changed at all.

Though Cordy was feeling broken inside, she still made the greatest effort not to show any feelings of hopelessness, as she continued to rant and whine like the rich bitch of Sunnydale that everyone knew. No one could have ever suspected the incredible stress and anxiety that she really felt, knowing that her love would be making love to another.

When Xander offered to take her to the Bronze that night to prepare for the party, she refused, using the excuse that she didn't want anyone to know about their relationship. The truth of the matter was that Cordy didn't know if she pull it through. All day she had wanted to cry and scream but then she thought of Angel and surpress the urge to cry.

~Cordy, get ahold of yourself. You just have to get through this, that's all. Once you get all of this out of the way, then you can just have the best life with Angel Cordy rationalized. ~This was meant to happen Cordy. He was supposed to sleep with Buffy. It was how it panned out. But eventually he fell in love with you. That's all that matters.

Though she tried her best to keep thinking positive about the whole thing, as she began to dress for the party, she couldn't help but have doubts about how Angel really felt about her, especially back in this time, where Buffy and Angel were madly in love with one another. ~ Could he be remembering all of those old feelings again?

She then took a deep breath, exhaled, and left for the party.

*****************

Angel was definitely impatient to say the least. He had made it a priority to get to Buffy's party early and wait for the best moment to talk to Cordy. He needed her to know what he had figured out. But as the Scooby gang scrambled to get everything ready for Buffy's birthday celebration, he couldn't find Cordy anywhere.

"Angel, could you help me put up the balloons?" Willow asked as Angel was looking around the room. "Don't worry." Willow assured him.

"Huh?" Angel asked.

"Buffy will be here. Jenny's gonna get here no matter what."Willow explained, thinking that Angel was looking for Buffy.

"Yeah… Buffy." Angel asked, as Willow handed him some balloons. However, his attention wavered once more, as he finally saw Cordy arrive through the side door. If he had a heart, it would have skipped a beat . He just couldn't take his eyes off of Cordy. She walked in wearing a dark red halter style top and a black short skirt, with her long, flowing hair slightly pulled back, but still cascaded down her shoulders. She literally took his breath away and also made him wonder why he didn't notice the first time.

Cordy also kept staring at Angel. Although he was dressed in his normal attire of a dark blue shirt, and his old reliable black leather jacket, he still looked beautiful to her. He would look beautiful forever.

While anyone who would have bothered to notice Angel's and Cordy's eyes would have seen the sheer yearning and longing that existed between them, everyone was so preoccupied, no one was aware of it.

"Angel… the balloons." Willow reminded him.

"Yeah, the balloons." Angel replied, as he tried to do as Willow as she asked and tried to take his mind off of Cordy.

Cordy took her eyes off Angel and looked around the room. She then saw Oz trying to help with the decorations. She walked over to him.

"Hi Oz." Cordy said and waved at him.

"Hi Cordelia. I didn't think you knew my name. It's nice to finally get to talk to you." Oz said as he offered his hand. "It's so weird that we've been going to the same school all this time, but we've never talked."

"Yeah, I know." Cordy said, realizing the situation. "So this is your first date with Willow, right?"

"Yeah." Oz replied. "So do you know when Buffy's getting here?"

"I don't know." Cordy admitted.

She then walked over to the corner of the room and just stood there. She would help but she then decided that it would be un-Queen C to lift a finger, so she just stood there and watched the craziness that was happening before him, the Scooby gang scrambling to get everything perfect for Buffy's party. As Cordy's mind started to wander, suddenly a hand grabbed her hand.

Cordy let out a gasp.

"Shhush." Angel whispered, and quickly pulled her away to a nearby storage room and shut the door.

"Angel, what about the others?" Cordy asked. "Wouldn't they notice that we're not there?"

"They're too busy." Angel replied. "Anyways, it's not like anybody out there really cares about us…I just… I just wanted to see you. I needed to see you." He then pulled her close and traced her face with his finger.

"Oh God Angel!" Cordy whispered as she buried her head into his chest. "You have no idea how long this day has been. It's been total hell!"

"Don't worry. It's all going to be over in a couple of hours. Just hang in there." Angel assured her as he rested his chin on her head.

Cordy then pulled away to look up at his face. "But that's what I'm afraid of." She kept looking at his eyes and she just couldn't take it any longer.

Angel then impulsively grabbed her face and kissed her passionately, as if he couldn't get enough of her. They just kept pawing and pulling at each other, Cordy pulling at Angel's shirt and Angel putting his hands under her top. They were insatiatable.

Then Cordy suddenly pulled away. "Angel," Cordy said breathlessly. "really, what are we going to do? We can't just be cooped up in this storage room forever." Though she did have it as an option for a fleeting moment. 

Angel finally focused and looked lovingly at Cordy. "I've figured out a way, but you have to listen to me and…"

"Cordelia?" Xander yelled out to interrupt them. "Where are you?"

"Angel, I have to go." Cordy whispered. As she was about to leave, she pulled Angel in for another fervent kiss, and ran out of the room.

"But Cordy…" Angel whispered, however it was too late. She left the storage room too quickly before he could tell her his plan.

******************

Willow, Oz, Xander, Giles and Cordy all were hiding under a pool table as they waited for Buffy to show. Although they'd had become all restless because Buffy was late, only Angel showed some stress waiting for her.(At least he pretended to)

"Where is she?" Angel asked.

The gang then peeped their heads above the pool table.

"Shussh! I hear her coming." Willow whispered, wanting him to hide under the table as well.

Angel could hear some noises of struggle from outside, probably Buffy fighting some demons. But he knew that Buffy could hand…

CRASH!

Out of nowhere, Buffy and a vampire came crashing through the window and hit the floor. Most of them stood up to look. The vampire then tried to get at Buffy but as he struggled, Buffy instinctly grabbed a drumstick from a drum set and staked him, reducing him to ashes, much to Oz's utter amazement. Suddenly, Cordy jumped up from behind the pool table, with her hands raised up high.

"Surprise!" Cordy cried out.

Although everyone one else gave her a strange look, Angel couldn't help but smile at Cordy's impulsive act. ~She's so cute!

"That pretty much sums it up." Oz replied.

Buffy then hopped off the stage. 

"Buffy are you okay?" Angel asked.

"Yes. W-what happened?" Giles added.

"Uh, there were these vamps outs..." Buffy explained, but her voice trailed as she noticed the decorations. " W-what's going on?"

"Oh, um... A surprise party. "Giles replied, as he blew out a party favour.

"Happy Birthday." Cordy exclaimed, trying to sound as sincere as possible ~It is her birthday. I mean, how is she going to know what is going to happen?

Buffy began to smile. "You guys did all this for me?" She then looked at Angel. "That is so sweet."

Cordy then tried not to cringe.

"You sure you're okay?" Angel asked.

"Yes, I'm fine." Buffy assured him.

"Are you okay?" Willow asked Oz, feeling sorry for him for being exposed to the vampire thing on their first date.

"Yeah. Hey, did everybody see that guy just turn to dust?" Oz asked.

"Uh, well, uh... sort of." Willow admitted.

Cordy was so preoccupied with looking at Buffy with Angel, she didn't even pat attention to the conversation that was going on.

Then Jenny appeared carrying a long box.

"Hey, can somebody give me a hand here?" Jenny said.

Angel and Giles took the box from her and set it on the table.

"Those creeps left this behind." Jenny explained.

"What is it?' Buffy asked.

Angel and Cordy quickly looked at each other as they knew exactly what was in it. They were too preoccupied by the other event, they had completely forgotten about the mystery box. But before they could warn anyone, Buffy opened the box and the arm grabbed her by the throat and began to choke her.

************************

Angel struggled to pull the arm off of Buffy, but when he did, he quickly stuffed it into the box once more, as Buffy struggled to breathe.

"Well, clearly the Hellmouth's answer to 'what do you get the Slayer who has everything?' " Xander exclaimed.

"Good heavens. Buffy, are you all right?" Giles asked with concern.

"Man, that thing had major grip." Buffy noted, as her hands were still on her neck.

"What was that?" Willow asked.

"It looked like an arm." Oz replied.

"It-it's a legend... way before my time... of a demon brought forth to rid the Earth of the plague of humanity... separate the righteous from the wicked... and to burn the righteous down. They call him the Judge." Angel explained, as the memories started to flood back to him.

"The Judge? This is he?" Giles asked.

"Not all of him." Angel clarified.

"Um, still needing backstory here." Buffy said, still confused.

"Um... He, he, he couldn't be killed, yes? Um, a-an army was sent against him. Most of them died... but, uh, finally they were able to dismember him, but, uh... not kill him." Giles explained.

"The pieces were scattered... buried in every corner of the Earth." Angel continued.

"So all these parts are being brought here." Jenny said, beginning to understand.

"By Drusilla. The vamps outside were Spike's men." Buffy added.

"She's just crazy enough to do it." Angel noted.

"Do what, reassemble the Judge?" Willow asked.

"And bring forth Armageddon." Angel finished.

"Is anybody else gonna have cake?" Cordy asked out of the blue, just to reaffirm everyone's opinions of her being clueless.

"We need to get this out of town." Giles declared.

"Angel." Jenny said.

"What?" Buffy asked.

"You have to do it. You're the only one that can protect this thing." Jenny explained as she looked at Angel.

"What about me?" Buffy offered.

"What, you're just gonna skip town for a few months?" Jenny retorted.

"'Months'?" Buffy exclaimed, realizing what it really entailed.

"She's right. I gotta get this to the remotest region possible." Angel agreed, knowing where this conversation was getting to.

"But that's not months." Buffy argued.

"I gotta catch a cargo ship to Asia, maybe trek to Nepal..." Angel explained.

"You know, those newfangled flying machines really are much safer than they used to be." Buffy said.

"I can't fly. There's no sure way to guard against the daylight. I-I-I don't like this any more than you do, Buffy. But there's no other choice." Angel tried to explain again, playing his part.

"When?" Buffy asked.

"Tonight. As soon as possible." Angel answered.

"But it's my birthday." Buffy retorted with a little bitterness.

Angel looked down as he noticed Buffy's reaction.

Jenny then walked over to them. "I'll drive you to the docks."

Cordy just watched as she was helpless in what was happening. She wanted so badly to run to Angel, but she knew she couldn't. As Angel and Buffy started to leave, Cordy tried to contain her tears. Angel then sadly looked back at her, and gave her a glance. He tried to give her a reassuring glance ~I love you. Angel thought, as Buffy took his hand, and pulled her away. Cordy couldn't be consoled by Angel's last glance, since she was afraid that it would be the last time she'd ever lay eyes on him.

****************

Chapter 18

 

Angel felt a twinge of awkwardness as Buffy held onto his arm, (as he held onto the box in the other) while they were walking to the boat. Obviously, he remembered how much he had been in love with her and how much she had meant to him, but somehow, all of this didn't really seem right. However, Buffy needed to believe that he was the old Angel, so he kissed her head as she leaned against him.

"I should go the rest of the way alone." Angel declared, unable to take the uncomfortable situation.

"Okay." Buffy replied.

"But I'll be back. I will" Angel added.

"When? Six months, a year? You don't know how long it's gonna take or if we'll even..." Buffy said softly as her head looked down in sadness.

"If we'll even what?" Angel asked.

Buffy looked up at him with tears streaming from her eyes. "Well, if you haven't noticed, someone pretty much always wants us dead."

"Don't say that. We'll be fine." Angel assured her, although from what has happened in the last three years, Angel was so sure about that, but he needed for Buffy to remain strong.

"We don't know that." Buffy answered back.

"We can't know, Buffy. Nobody can. That's just the deal." Angel replied. He actually believed this. Although it was strange that he would know what was in the cards for Buffy in the next few years, who knows what would happen later, or if even things will happen the way that they should. A sense of fear swept over him suddenly, as he began to wonder if his and Cordy's future would be the way that it should or disaster would strike again. Then Angel snapped back to reality as he remembered what he was supposed to do at this very moment. It was something that he was struggling with ever since he knew what time period him and Cordy landed in, but in the end, he knew it had to happen and that it was crucial to ensuring that he and Cordy would have a chance at coming home. He then breathed in and took the leap.

"I have something for you. For your birthday. I... I was gonna give it to you earlier, but..." Angel began, as he fetched a ring out of his pocket.

"It's beautiful." Buffy declared.

"My people -- before I was changed -- they exchanged this as a sign of devotion. It's a claddagh ring. The hands represent friendship, the crown represents loyalty... and the heart... Well, you know... Wear it with the heart pointing towards you. It means you belong to somebody. Like this." Angel explained. The words were very personal to him and he had to try hard not to become emotional over this. ~Angel, remember, this was the girl that you loved. At this moment, you did truly want to give this to her. You loved her. But that doesn't take away what you have with Cordy.

He then showed his finger with a ring of its own. Buffy then took his hand and kissed it.

Angel tried not to react as she kissed his hand. 

"Put it on." Angel said.

Buffy slowly puts it on and then begin to sob again.

"I don't want to do this." Buffy cried out.

"Me either." Angel said. All he really wanted to do was run and find Cordy quickly and hold her in his arms, but he knew it wasn't possible.

"So don't go." Buffy insisted. She then pulled him close and kissed him passionately.

Angel broke away suddenly. "Buffy…I …" trying to explain.

However, there was no time for any explanations, as two vampires appeared out of nowhere to attack them. One pulls Buffy away from Angel, while the other begins to fight Angel. As one of the vampires starts to swing at Buffy, she counteracts this by punching him in the stomach. Angel then flips the other and then punches him in the face. But as they are occupied, another vampire drops out of a cargo net nearby, takes the box and runs.

"Angel! The box!" Buffy cried out.

Angel then took off to get the box back by tackling the vampire down. Meanwhile, Buffy is still left to defend herself against the other two. Although she manages to kick one of them, he retaliates by punching her in the face. While Angel is busy trying to punch the vampire he had captured, the vampire that he was fighting off before grabs the box and makes a run for it. As Buffy tried to stop him, the other vampire suddenly picked her up and threw her into the water below. Angel sees this and panics.

"Buffy!" he yelled. Angel then instinctly jumps over the railing and into to the water to save her.

**************************

"They should be back by now." Giles exclaimed. He, Willow and Xander were all pacing around the library, waiting for Buffy and Jenny to return.

"Maybe Buffy needed a few minutes to pull herself together. Poor Buffy, on her birthday and everything." Willow suggested.

"Hmm, it's sad, granted. But let's look at the upside for a moment." Xander replied. "I mean, what kind of a future would she've really had with him?" She's got 2 jobs -- Denny's waitress by day, Slayer by night -- and Angel's always in front of the TV with a big blood belly, and he's dreamin' of the glory days when Buffy still thought this whole creature of the night routine was a big turnon."

"You've thought way too much about this." Willow observed, a little disturbed by Xander's comment.

"No, no. That's just the beginning. Have I told you the part where I fly into town in my private jet and take Buffy out for prime rib?" Xander asked.

"Xander…"Willow warned, since Buffy unexpectedly walks in, wearing a completely different outfit.

"What happened?" Giles asked.

"Dru's guys ambushed us. They got the box." Buffy explained, ready to get down to business.

"Where's Jenny?" Giles noted.

"Uh, she took Angel to get clothing…"Buffy replied.

*************************

Cordy was sitting alone in one of the empty classrooms. While Giles, Willow and Xander was in the library researching about the Judge, she quietly sneaked out of there, needing some time by herself. She couldn't sit in the library and think about Angel. They would have seen the expression on her face, the tears streaming down her face and would know that there was something wrong. She knew that she still had a duty to keep up the fascade. However, it was getting so hard that she just had to escape and find a place to breathe. She felt as if her whole world was closing in on her and there was no escape. As she sat there, reflecting on the past few days, she sort of wished that she had never agreed to Wes' plan in the first place, as she couldn't believe how naïve she was. All she thought about was Angel and their life together. She had no idea the cursed ring would send them back here, amid all this chaos. This chaos in particular since this would be the part of Angel's life that would be hardest to take: the fact that Angel would not only make love to Buffy, but that he would lose his soul again.

As she was about to close her eyes and basically fall apart, she suddenly saw Angel by the door. She ran quickly to him. Angel then quickly closed the door and put his finger to his lips to motion to her to keep quiet.

"Angel! I thought I'd never see you again!" Cordy whispered, putting her arms around him.

"Cordy, I don't have much time." Angel replied. "I had to stall Jenny for a while, but I just had to see you."

"You knew that I would be here waiting for you." Cordy whispered back.

"Cordy, focus here. I need to tell you what to do now." Angel replied.

"What Angel… I'll do anything." Cordy said.

"So when I leave here with Buffy to Spike's factory, and all is said and done, I want you to take this ring." Angel said, as he took Cordy's hand, touching the ring. "wait for it to light up and leave."

"What?" Cordy, not understanding it at all.

"You heard me Cordy." Angel replied. " I want you to wait for the ring to light up, recite the chant and go."

"Angel, you can't ask me to do that! Anything but that!" Cordy whispered.

"Cordy, don't argue with me on this. You can't wait up for me. You have to go without me. It's the only way." Angel argued back.

"Angel, how can I go without you?" Cordy replied, as the tears started to stream down her face. "You promised that we'd be together. You said that no matter what, we'd go through this together!"

"But Cordy, you know what I have to do…"Angel said.

"I know, you have to make love to Buffy…"Cordy said in disgust.

"See? How can I go with you if I'm Angelus? There is no way that you can wait." Angel said.

"I can and I will!" Cordy said.

"No you can't! Once the moment is done, the ring lights up one time and only one time. Wes said it himself. We have only one chance and this is what you have to do."

"Angel, this isn't fair! Do you know how hard it was to be here? To know that in a few hours, you are going to make love to Buffy? Do you know how much I wanted it to be me?" Cordy cried.

Angel then pulled her into his arms and held on tight.

"Cordy, I know, I know… but we have no choice on the matter." Angel replied softly.

"Angel, you can't leave me like this!" Cordy cried.

"Cordy, you know I'll never leave you… I'll always be with you. "Angel began, "But you know that this is our only hope. If everything works out as it should, we'll have our life back…."

"But you don't know that for sure." Cordy said.

"All I know is that we've come this far, so we have to take that chance…we have to have faith that no matter what happens, we'll end up together." Angel replied.

"Angel…I…" Cordy whispered, still unsure about the whole thing.

"I … have something for you." Angel whispered. He first unsnapped the locket necklace that he gave her, pulled off the claddagh ring he had on his finger, and put the ring on the chain as well.

"Angel…you gave this ring to Buffy." Cordy observed.

"I know… but I'm giving mine to you because I need you to know that I belong to you. You alone." Angel replied. "If you ever doubt it, just open the locket and read what it says inside."

"Angel… ple…please don't leave me." Cordy pleaded.

"Cordy, you have to be strong. Be strong for the both of us now." Angel replied, with tears starting to form in his eyes as well. "I love you with all of my heart Cordy and no matter what happens now, always know that I love you."

Angel then pulled her in and kissed her and held onto her for dear life, and kissed her madly as if it was the last time, he then slowly pulled away, walking towards the door. 

"Cordy remember. When the ring lights up, just say the lines and go. I beg of you, just do this one thing for me. Please." Angel begged her.

"Angel…I love you." Cordy whispered. 

And then he was gone.

**********************

As Angel made his way to the library, he quickly dried away his tears, hoping that his eyes weren't completely blood shot so that no would notice.

"Sh-sh-sh." Giles whispered. He then motioned him into the office where Buffy was sound asleep with her head resting on a book. "Seems Buffy needed some rest."

"Yeah. She hasn't been sleeping well. Tossing and turning." Angel replied, but then noticed that everyone was looking at him. " She told me. Because of her dreams?" Angel clarified.

"Angel!" Buffy cried out suddenly. 

Angel runs to Buffy. "Buffy, it's okay. I'm here. I'm right here." Buffy then pulls him into her arms to hold on tight.

"Buffy, what's happening?" Giles asked, as he is concerned with her.

"She had another dream." Angel replied.

"I think I know where Spike and Drusilla are. "Buffy explained.

"That's very good, however, you, you do need a plan. I-I know you're concerned, Buffy, but you can't just go off half-cocked." Giles noted.

"I have a plan. Angel and I go to the factory and do recon, figure out how far they've gotten assembling the Judge. You guys check any places the boxes could be coming into town. Shipping yards, airports, anything. We need to stop them from getting all the boxes in one place." Buffy explained.

"Yes. Yes, well, um, actually, that's quite a good plan." Giles admitted.

"This thing is nasty, and it's real, Giles. We can't wait for it to come get us." Buffy exclaimed. Buffy then takes her bag, and both her and Angel walk out the door.

*********************

Angel couldn't concentrate at all. Although he and Buffy had just snuck into Spike's factory, he couldn't think of anything but Cordy. ~Cordy, please, just do as I ask…

"I saw this. The party." Buffy whispered, as Angel refocused again.

However, they couldn't hide up there for long since the Judge could sense their presence. 

"What? What is it?" Spike asked, as he saw the Judge's expression.

The Judge then looked up and saw both Angel and Buffy.

"We gotta get out of here."Angel declared.

They both try to make a run for it, but it was too late as vampires were flanked at either end and surrounded them. Then, they take both Buffy and Angel downstairs to be brought before Spike, Druscilla and the Judge. Although Angel was not taken aback by Spike's presence, he felt a little weird seeing Druscilla again as he remembered how much trouble she caused him later in life.

"Well, well. Look what we have here. Crashers." Spike said.

"I'm sure our invitations just got lost in the mail." Buffy replied.

"It's delicious." Druscilla noted as she licked her fingers and walked over to Angel. "I only dreamed you'd come. Rrrr."

"Leave her alone." Angel demanded, as he struggled under the grasp of Spike's men.

"Yeah, that'll work. Now say 'pretty please'." Spike said with a satisfying smile.

"The girl." The Judge noted.

"Chilling, isn't it? She's so full of good intention." Druscilla exclaimed.

"Take me!" Angel suddenly blurted out.

"No!" Buffy cried out.

"Take me instead of her!" Angel insisted.

"Uh, you're not clear on the concept, pal. There is no instead. Just first and second." Spike explained.

" And if you go first, you don't get to watch the Slayer die." Druscilla added, trying to clarify the situation even further.

The Judge then reached for Buffy, as Angel's captors pull him back. Spike and Druscilla just watched happily as all of this was going on before them.

"Don't touch him!" Angel cried out.

Instead of touching him, Buffy kicks the Judge in the chest and knocks him back. Angel then breaks free of his captors. Buffy then runs towards Angel and notices that there is a hole in the floor.

"This way!" Buffy directed.

They both go through the hole and to the sewers below. Although Druscilla had ordered her henchmen to pursue them, they were able to lose them while going through the sewer tunnels. Finally they were able to find a ladder. Buffy went up the ladder first, opened up the manhole, and climbs out. Angel then climbs out himself, as rain was pouring down on them. 

"Come on. We need to get inside." Angel declared.

Buffy and Angel then get to Angel's apartment. Angel opens the door, turns on the light and they both go in. Buffy closes the door behind them. Angel then takes off his leather jacket and puts it aside. Buffy just stands there, completely soaking wet.

"You're shaking like a leaf." Angel said with concern.

"Cold." Buffy said simply.

"Let me get you something." Angel said. Although he was already feeling uneasy, he was still worried about her. He took out some clothes from the armoire nearby and hands them to her.

"Put these on. Get under the covers, just to warm up." Angel declares.

Buffy slowly walks over to Angel's bed and sits down. Angel then turns his head so that he couldn't see Buffy changing, however his head turns back as he heard Buffy groaning in pain.

"What?" Angel asked.

"Oh, um... It's okay. I just have a cut or something." Buffy replied.

"Can I... Lemme see." Angel offered as he sat down beside her.

"Okay." Buffy whispered.

Angel gently looked at her back and then pulls her shirt down again.

"It's already closed. You're fine."

Buffy then leaned her head back and cuddled her face to him. Angel, although he was even more unnerving than ever, he still obliged her by putting his arms around her.

************************

Cordy was sitting outside of her house. It was completely quiet outside and it was pouring outside. But Cordy didn't care. All that she could do was to stare at the ring. Ever since Xander took her home, Cordy could only sit on the front steps of the porch and think about Angel. Sitting here, unable to go out to do anything about what was happening was killing her from the inside. All she could see was Buffy's arms around him, with Angel holding her as well. ~Stop thinking about them, Cordy! It's just gonna kill you! So Cordy just sat there and waited.

*************************

"You almost went away today." Buffy whispered.

"We both did." Angel answered.

"Angel..." Buffy said, as she began to cry " * sniffle * I feel like I lost you... You're right, though. We can't be sure of anything."

Angel certainly knew that feeling.

"Shhh. I..." Angel began.

Buffy then turned to look at him.

For a second there, Angel had wanted to tell her everything, but he knew he couldn't risk it.

 

"I love you. I try not to, but I can't stop." Angel said instead.

"Me, me, too. I can't either." Buffy answered back. She then moved in to kiss him, then Angel suddenly broke away.

"Buffy, maybe we shouldn't..." Angel said, trying to stall, trying to convince her to stop.

"Don't. Just kiss me." Buffy answered back, as she slowly moved him down towards the bed.

*********************

Cordy couldn't sit still anymore. She just couldn't. She started to stand and walk out towards the empty streets. Although it was raining pretty hard outside, she didn't give a damn. She just stood there, in the middle of the street as the rain fell down, soaking her clothes up. Cordy lifted her head up and closed her eyes. She needed to feel something, feel anything now, since the only thing she could feel was numb.

*********************

As Buffy laid underneath him and he was on top, he didn't know what to do. It was as if he was frozen.

"Are you okay Angel?" Buffy asked. "Don't worry. I want to. I want you inside of me." Buffy then reached up to kiss his neck.

Angel then flashed back…

FLASH!

    - I'm only alive when you're inside me…

He needed to do this, no matter how much it felt wrong to him. Angel just took a breath and thought to himself ~You need to do this… If you don't, Cordy will never get out of here. This is for Cordy… "Cordy…" he whispered so softly as he kissed Buffy. Since he only muttered it under his breath, Buffy couldn't hear what he was saying.

"Angel…"Buffy moaned, as Angel entered her.

********************

"Angel!" Cordy screamed out under the rain. "Angel!"

She didn't know why she was even screaming at all. He couldn't hear her. Angel was making love to Buffy. She couldn't imagine the screams and the moans that would have been heard. Cordy then just started to cry endlessly, as she felt her heart being ripped to shreds and felt suddenly hollow. 

"Angel, how can you just leave me like this!" Cordy cried out. Cordy just started to scream endlessly just to take away the pain. 

********************

Angel suddenly sat up from the bed. Lightning was striking outside. Buffy was sound asleep beside him. He couldn't breathe, as he gasped for air.

"AHH!" Angel exclaimed in pain.

He gets out from the bed and hurries off, unbeknownst to Buffy.

*********************

Cordy was just so tired and angry now. As she was about to pull the wretched ring off of her finger, the ring, out of nowhere, lit up with its bright light.

Cordy gasped in shock.

Angel had done it. Angel had done the deed.

"What am I supposed to do?" Cordy cried out. "Am I supposed to just leave you here! I can't!"

 

She then suddenly looked down and saw the locket and Angel's claddagh ring hanging from her neck.

She slowly held it in her hands and opened it. "You make me feel alive."

She then looked at the ring on her finger and knew exactly what to do.

*************************

Angel just ran out of the apartment, still gasping for air. He wanted to run, but he began to feel so weak, he couldn't even stand. Instead, he just stumbled onto the pavement outside, still crying out in pain.

"CORDY!" he cried out. "CORDY!!" Although he kept on screaming out her name, no one could hear him at all.

 

End of Part III

To be continued…