A/N: As per Twist's request, I'm going to pack as much as I possibly can into this chapter without going completely insane (oop! Too late! ^-^). I have pretty much all the time in the world to work on this thing, so I figure that I should work really hard on the last few chapters. Yes, *weep*, the end is near, but I'm planning my next one already. A quick reviewer poll... should my next Discworld fic be centered on vampires or Elves? Personally I'm leaning towards vampires, but I'm really not sure. Aargh, I feel like Hwel. Some kind of idea-magnet. Blargh. Ah, well, on with the show!
Chapter 8
Magic was returning to the Discworld. In some ways this was a good thing, as trolls rumbled to life in the hills and mountains, zombies quite literally pulled themselves together, and talking trees awoke. In a remote corner of the Disc the Luggage snapped its lid irritably a few times and Rincewind accidentally turned a small rock into a ham sandwich, fainting dead away from shock.
With the hiss of black sand, a small black cottage blurred into focus on the edges of reality. Death's eyes flared blue. Death was alive. Death was abroad.
Death was -angry-.
It was bad enough being dead. That was just a minor inconvenience. But death was Death's JOB, it didn't just work itself if he went away.
But people had died. Lifetimers were missing on the shelves.
Death took long, purposeful strides down the black corridor toward the enormous black door. As he passed the black umbrella stand in the black entryway, he grabbed his scythe. Something clicked, and the blade shot out of the handle.
Deep in Death's sockets, two red supernovas flared.
Susan Sto-Helit popped into existence with a sigh, shaking out her hair and giving the world in general a maliciously innocent grin. She could feel something off-balance, something pulling at her elbow, shouting that something was wrong.
What did she care? She had the world. The world was a simple glittering toy to be tossed and tumbled and broken and forgotten. There were other worlds, other lives, other magical fields to thrive in.
Susan could feel the memories setting in. She could make her own toys; she had done it before. Carve them out of a supple twig of nothingness, change it to her every whim, play games with it until it wore out or she tired of it. Power was not sitting at the top of some mountain, blindly pretending to rule lives and souls. Power was not catering to mere mortals. Power was not saving anyone.
Power was fear. Put the fear of death in someone and they will never go to battle. Put the fear of boredom in someone and they will die for a thrill. But to fear oneself, to fear one's very existence, that was power. Susan had the power. Susan could make the world destroy itself.
That sounded like fun.
SUSAN HAS BECOME THE LADY, the Lady grumbled in a slightly sullen way. BUT SHE DOESN'T REMEMBER THE RESPONSIBILITY, THE.. THE -CARE- THE JOB TAKES.
"So this isn't going to be a cup of tea, eh?" Ponder sighed miserably, slouching on a rune-covered table. "She'll try to destroy the world or something."
SUSAN WOULD NOT DESTROY THE WORLD, the Lady snapped at him, shaking herself out of her sulk. SUSAN HOLDS IT TOO CLOSE, TOO DEAR. SHE IS TOO HUMAN TO DESTROY THE WORLD.
"But YOU'RE different," Granny pointed out, arching her eyebrows and KNOWING she had hit a nerve. "Less calm. More irritable. Susan Sto-Helit may be human enough not to destroy the world, but is what she has become as well?"
The Lady hesitated. She had never hesitated, ever, in her entire life. She always had the answers to all the riddles, the keys to all the locks. She found it distinctly unnerving. It was like knowing you didn't know what you knew you had known before.
I DON'T KNOW, the Lady admitted testily, sweeping her skirts. ALL I WANT TO DO IS GET MY OLD VOICE BACK--
BEFORE IT GETS CONFUSING? Death finished, suddenly looming over her with his glowing red eyes. WHERE IS SUSAN? WHY ARE YOU TALKING WITH HER VOICE?
I THOUGHT YOU KNEW EVERYTHING, the Lady replied frostily, turning her back on the seven foot skeleton. WHY DON'T YOU TELL ME?
DO NOT ADDRESS ME AS YOU WOULD A SCHOOLCHILD, Death rattled, a cold black fury permeating the air around him. THERE ARE MANY THINGS I HAVE NO KNOWLEDGE OF. WHERE IS SUSAN?
The Lady was silent. A dreadful certainty swept through her like a frozen tidal wave, sending icicles down her spine. The knowledge took her by the throat, forbidding the words to pass her lips.
"She's on Cori Celesti," the Lady croaked, her eyes glittering a dull emerald green.
The Librarian grinned disarmingly down at the trembling student wizard, pulling his lips back from his teeth in the way of orangutans everywhere. The student shook.
"I remember you," the Librarian rumbled, his bright red beard grinning with him. "You got 'Tantric Sex for the Feeble-Minded' wet in the bath. Oh, by the way, could you go run and tell the faculty that..... oook?"
The student fainted dead away, and the Librarian caught him happily in his long shaggy arms.
The orangutan tied his badge around the part of himself where his neck probably was. Time to save the world.
Somewhere near the hub, in an enormous temple on the cliffs, three priests read the future on enormous stone tablets.
The fact that they were at the bottom of the last one is not terribly important but just relevant enough to mention.
Susan giggled as she placed her hands palms down on the map of the Discworld, brushing away dust and debris and chess pieces. She trailed her fingers over the surface, leaving nonorine wakes like spreading germs swirling across the top.
Ah. THIS was how it was supposed to work. Susans eyes burned violet as the rancid waves glazed the grid in a thick, sweetly decaying frost, like a big, huge, rotten, decadent CAKE. She could taste the fear already, burning her tongue.
It was a wonderful sensation.
Thunder rumbled in the clouds underneath her, blue flashes illuminating her smile. This was SO MUCH FUN. She had never imagined it could be this way. She must be dreaming.
Susan Sto-Helit woke up.
Chapter 8
Magic was returning to the Discworld. In some ways this was a good thing, as trolls rumbled to life in the hills and mountains, zombies quite literally pulled themselves together, and talking trees awoke. In a remote corner of the Disc the Luggage snapped its lid irritably a few times and Rincewind accidentally turned a small rock into a ham sandwich, fainting dead away from shock.
With the hiss of black sand, a small black cottage blurred into focus on the edges of reality. Death's eyes flared blue. Death was alive. Death was abroad.
Death was -angry-.
It was bad enough being dead. That was just a minor inconvenience. But death was Death's JOB, it didn't just work itself if he went away.
But people had died. Lifetimers were missing on the shelves.
Death took long, purposeful strides down the black corridor toward the enormous black door. As he passed the black umbrella stand in the black entryway, he grabbed his scythe. Something clicked, and the blade shot out of the handle.
Deep in Death's sockets, two red supernovas flared.
Susan Sto-Helit popped into existence with a sigh, shaking out her hair and giving the world in general a maliciously innocent grin. She could feel something off-balance, something pulling at her elbow, shouting that something was wrong.
What did she care? She had the world. The world was a simple glittering toy to be tossed and tumbled and broken and forgotten. There were other worlds, other lives, other magical fields to thrive in.
Susan could feel the memories setting in. She could make her own toys; she had done it before. Carve them out of a supple twig of nothingness, change it to her every whim, play games with it until it wore out or she tired of it. Power was not sitting at the top of some mountain, blindly pretending to rule lives and souls. Power was not catering to mere mortals. Power was not saving anyone.
Power was fear. Put the fear of death in someone and they will never go to battle. Put the fear of boredom in someone and they will die for a thrill. But to fear oneself, to fear one's very existence, that was power. Susan had the power. Susan could make the world destroy itself.
That sounded like fun.
SUSAN HAS BECOME THE LADY, the Lady grumbled in a slightly sullen way. BUT SHE DOESN'T REMEMBER THE RESPONSIBILITY, THE.. THE -CARE- THE JOB TAKES.
"So this isn't going to be a cup of tea, eh?" Ponder sighed miserably, slouching on a rune-covered table. "She'll try to destroy the world or something."
SUSAN WOULD NOT DESTROY THE WORLD, the Lady snapped at him, shaking herself out of her sulk. SUSAN HOLDS IT TOO CLOSE, TOO DEAR. SHE IS TOO HUMAN TO DESTROY THE WORLD.
"But YOU'RE different," Granny pointed out, arching her eyebrows and KNOWING she had hit a nerve. "Less calm. More irritable. Susan Sto-Helit may be human enough not to destroy the world, but is what she has become as well?"
The Lady hesitated. She had never hesitated, ever, in her entire life. She always had the answers to all the riddles, the keys to all the locks. She found it distinctly unnerving. It was like knowing you didn't know what you knew you had known before.
I DON'T KNOW, the Lady admitted testily, sweeping her skirts. ALL I WANT TO DO IS GET MY OLD VOICE BACK--
BEFORE IT GETS CONFUSING? Death finished, suddenly looming over her with his glowing red eyes. WHERE IS SUSAN? WHY ARE YOU TALKING WITH HER VOICE?
I THOUGHT YOU KNEW EVERYTHING, the Lady replied frostily, turning her back on the seven foot skeleton. WHY DON'T YOU TELL ME?
DO NOT ADDRESS ME AS YOU WOULD A SCHOOLCHILD, Death rattled, a cold black fury permeating the air around him. THERE ARE MANY THINGS I HAVE NO KNOWLEDGE OF. WHERE IS SUSAN?
The Lady was silent. A dreadful certainty swept through her like a frozen tidal wave, sending icicles down her spine. The knowledge took her by the throat, forbidding the words to pass her lips.
"She's on Cori Celesti," the Lady croaked, her eyes glittering a dull emerald green.
The Librarian grinned disarmingly down at the trembling student wizard, pulling his lips back from his teeth in the way of orangutans everywhere. The student shook.
"I remember you," the Librarian rumbled, his bright red beard grinning with him. "You got 'Tantric Sex for the Feeble-Minded' wet in the bath. Oh, by the way, could you go run and tell the faculty that..... oook?"
The student fainted dead away, and the Librarian caught him happily in his long shaggy arms.
The orangutan tied his badge around the part of himself where his neck probably was. Time to save the world.
Somewhere near the hub, in an enormous temple on the cliffs, three priests read the future on enormous stone tablets.
The fact that they were at the bottom of the last one is not terribly important but just relevant enough to mention.
Susan giggled as she placed her hands palms down on the map of the Discworld, brushing away dust and debris and chess pieces. She trailed her fingers over the surface, leaving nonorine wakes like spreading germs swirling across the top.
Ah. THIS was how it was supposed to work. Susans eyes burned violet as the rancid waves glazed the grid in a thick, sweetly decaying frost, like a big, huge, rotten, decadent CAKE. She could taste the fear already, burning her tongue.
It was a wonderful sensation.
Thunder rumbled in the clouds underneath her, blue flashes illuminating her smile. This was SO MUCH FUN. She had never imagined it could be this way. She must be dreaming.
Susan Sto-Helit woke up.