Soliloquy in the Dark

Chapter Four

Just realised that I forgot to put a disclaimer on both Chapter's One and Two. AGHHHH. I realised this at about the same time some very expensive looking people in black suits came to my door and took every electronical item in my room as compensation. So, to prevent this happening again. I OWN ZILCH, NUTHIN' BUTTKISS, ZERO! Am I getting through to people here?

Also, once again a Ha-yuge Th-yank you to EVERYONE who reviewed. You are all shiny happy people 8)

Bulma stared at the little bean in the palm of her hand and wondered to herself how such a tiny object could make so much difference. The little beans had been very significant in various battles for the protection, not only of Earth, but also of her friends. She wondered what the senzu plants themselves looked like. Did the beans grow above or below ground? Did they come in pods? What were the flowers like? These tiny legumes could mean life or death. They not only restored energy, but were also the basic source of life. She wondered suddenly, if that was where they got their ability to heal? Maybe they were a channel of the growing power of everything natural into the bodies of her warrior friends, a sort of 'job perk' maybe, in return for protecting the Earth.

Bulma was shaken from her daydreaming by a sobbing noise of loss or regret from Vegeta. He was still dreaming. Bulma tried to wake him up to give him the senzu, but he wasn't responding. Finally, she decided that, as she had plenty of the beans, she could try out a little experiment with them. She used a pestle and mortar to grind down the hard little bean and then added it to water to make a solution. She transferred the liquid to Vegeta's drip and waited to see if it would have any effect.

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Vegeta screamed a question to the massing souls, so that he could be heard above their wails of ridicule and condemnation.

"What do you mean?" he cried. "What has your forgiveness got to do with my soul?"

The corpses hissed and explained.

To redeem your soul, the acts of carnage and mass murder that you have committed must be forgiven. You, Prince of a dead race, have destroyed millions. Our bodies burned in the heat of your violence and hate, the children screamed as you killed their parents in front of them, parents wailed in anguish as you stole or massacred their children, lovers hearts were ripped apart before they had a chance to grow. Your blood-saturated hands extinguished the essences of whole planets. They cried in agony as you blasted them apart piece by piece, purged them as if the healthy life they supported were nothing more than a pestilence or plague, but above all, you did all this with your own life's energy. This is why we can never forgive you.

Vegeta listened to this and protested.

"I did this by another's order. I would have been killed if I had not done this and revenge for my own people had to be taken. This is not justice."

The souls breathed back their reply.

Ahhh, but it would have been better to sacrifice your own life for the price of others, would it not? Your life and the lives of your people are a light price compared to the expense of the lives of those peoples and planets you have taken. There was no justice there and the justice here balances those scales. You owe us a debt Vegeta. And now that you have no soul of your own, we must find another acceptable way for you to pay it.

As they said this, Vegeta realised that the reason why he always felt that he was unacceptable, that he could do so much better, was because that most important part of him was missing. How could he perform tasks to the best of his abilities if he was weak inside? Although his race was not overly religious, they did have some beliefs, and the belief that their life energy was the pinpoint of their capabilities was a strong one. Saiyans were classed by power level. The source of their power is their ki, and ki is another term for spirit. *That's why I've never been able to reach my goal of Super-Saiyan! * Vegeta said to himself. *If I don't have a spirit, how can my power level ever rise to that? *

As he realised this, he found himself let out a sob of remorse and loss for a substance that he could never get back, and a goal lost. For these souls would never forgive him.

Then he remembered the monster's words.

"For you are too weak to live without one."

If he was too weak to live without a soul, and if he didn't have one, then how was it that he had the strongest power level on Earth? And how, then, had he survived for this long? He felt his strength return to him and hoisted himself up, resolved.

"I have lived," he said, punctuating his words by beating the corpses out of his way. "…For a long time under the reign of someone else." he flew up above them and powered up. "So if I don't have a soul now, and I didn't have a soul then…" he vaporised them and after their yells had stopped, looked down and whispered. "… I think I can manage without one."

Vegeta carried on rising and the last thing he heard before waking was a voice on the wind… we can never forgive you.

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Bulma heard Vegeta gasp before his eyes snapped open and he bolted upright. Before he could shout at him to sit back down, he did so anyway, groaning a little in pain. Bulma laughed happily and Vegeta glared at her.

"What's so funny, Onna?"

Bulma ignored what he had called her and instead began to jump up and down chanting.

"It worked, it worked, it worked, it worked. I am a genius!!!"

Vegeta looked at her sideways; the expression on his face showing that he clearly thought that she had cracked. He decided to humour her.

"What worked, baka?"

Bulma stopped jumping, came up to him and poked him in the arm, making him wince. "For your information, Oh Thick One, I managed to make a senzu solution and give it to you while you were unconscious. It's the stuff in that drip. It must take longer to work when it's diluted like that, but at least it works anyway!"

Vegeta 'humphed' at her but didn't retort. He was too busy thinking about his dream. Although he did not believe that dreams actually meant anything, he knew that that had been too vivid and coherent to be a simple dream. He decided that, as Saiyans could use telepathy, and he especially being of royal blood, it must have been a telepathic message of some sort. This meant that what had transpired in his mind had some semblance of truth to it. If this was so… Vegeta cringed inside. A tremendous feeling of loss or expectancy or longing suddenly settled in his mind. He was alone now; he had no soul and could never reach his full potential. As soon as he thought this he began to feel depressed.

Bulma, confused but not too unhappy with her patients silence, turned to the bag of senzus and gave Vegeta a solid one. He took it complacently and sat up. He began unwrapping his bandages as Bulma cleared up. He finally talked to her to ask a question.

"How did I get here anyway?" he asked, distractedly.

"Piccolo brought you in." Bulma replied.

"That green freak beat me?" Vegeta queried, confused.

Bulma spun on her heel and snapped at him. "Watch how you talk about 'that green freak'. He brought you home after your stupid stunt."

"Huh?" Vegeta was really lost now.

"You know that storm you so happily flew into? It decided that your stupidity should not go unrewarded and you got hit by lightning. Don't you remember?" Bulma asked.

Vegeta looked blank until it suddenly came back to him, and his eyes lit up in remembrance.

Bulma was still questioning him. "Why didn't you avoid it anyway?" she had asked.

"I was distracted." he growled through clenched teeth, also remembering exactly why he had been there in the first place.

"By what?" Bulma questioned.

Vegeta came out of it. "None of your business." He snapped.

Bulma was about to retort but Vegeta didn't give her the chance, pushing past her and walking out the door. Bulma seethed after him. "Why that good for nothing low down dirty…" she grumbled to herself.

She stared after his retreating back and found herself thinking, *I wonder what was wrong with him? * Before shaking her head and finishing up.

Phew! That was a long one. All in one go too. You know how it is when you get really into it. Please e-mail me any long suggestions/questions and I will try to reply. If you read and review and leave your e-mail address, I will send you another pressie, and I promise it won't be 'The Flood'. If you haven't got 'The Flood' and want it (I don't know why you would want it!) e-me and I'll send it. Oh, and also check out my sister Cade VD's fic. I know she'll love it if she gets reviews and I know that my regular reviewers always give helpful reviews. Hi all you guys! You know who you are. (It's really good as well.)