Solioquy
in the Dark
Chapter Six
Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, SORRY! I am soooooooo sorry that this part hasn't been out for yonx but I was banned from the Internet and have only just recently been allowed on at the weekend. Have fun with this chapter. I just picked up it's track again… re reading this thing helps to clear up writers block.
*I can't do it. *
Vegeta lay face down in the midst of his last attack and shut his
eyes. He sighed heavily and laid his head on his folded arms. He still kept his
face to the floor. He didn't want to face anything.
As long as he hid here… Hid!!!!
Okay, that was it. Enough was enough. It was stupid of
him to go on this way, he wanted to hide, hide
for crying out loud, from the world. He was giving up, and it sickened him.
* It's not enough
that I've lost it all, but now I've lost my spirit. I'm pathetic! This is
wrong. I am a Saiyan Prince; I was supposed to be admired for being the best of
the Saiyan. I'm supposed to represent the rest of the Saiyan race. And here I
am lying on my stomach, in a machine built by a baka Chikyuu-jin, on an
insignificant planet that was only worth sending a third-class brat to take it
over! *
Vegeta was angry, it bubbled up inside him, wanting to be let out.
He decided against it. He had gotten very good at suppressing his rage, saving
it up for more useful purposes later, while he was with Frieza.
* But you're not
with him any more. *
A little voice inside him
said.
* Why are you still
acting as if you are? *
He was angry and he was disgusted with himself… and yet he didn't
get up. He was suddenly confused and very, very tired. He felt it in his… well…
maybe not his soul, but definitely in his bones, in his blood, in his mind. He
was exhausted. That didn't make sense either. He had made sure that he had
gotten enough sleep after his storm- induced injury, and he hadn't been
training for very long. He was adept at staying awake for long periods of time
without sleeping. At the end of one of those especially long stretches he sometimes
felt like this. He couldn't remember being this tired after the amount of sleep
he had had.
He was doing nothing but confusing himself more, leaving
unanswered questions. And the feeling of exhaustion, the weariness that was as
heavy as the dead felt it continued to press on him. He curled his body up a
bit more… it was cold in this room… and tried to sleep.
****************************
Bulma walked up the path to the front door. She and
Chichi had been able to release most of their stress and aggression in the
class. As Chichi was more experienced in fighting than she herself was, she had
been giving the more difficult class, although they were both in the same room.
Bulma surprised herself by knowing more about karate than
she had expected. She supposed that she must have picked it up form her warrior
friends. She felt much more… relaxed now.
She wondered why that was. She knew for a fact that
Vegeta was never this good-humoured after he had been training. Mind you she
couldn't tell if he was ever in a good mood. Most of he time he was either
scowling at the world or smirking at it… and there was something distinctly
un-humoured about that smirk. It ridiculed the world around him and, although
this was subtle, it was sometimes self-mocking.
*Which doesn't make
sense. *
The Ouji was so arrogant
and proud there was probably no room left in him for self-hate.
Bulma realised that she had been standing outside the
door for a good few minutes, and she quickly let herself in.
She soon realised that she had nothing to do. Dinner had
been made and she had no projects to go on with. She picked up a magazine and
flicked through it, but put it down again ten minutes later, not wanting to
hear about the love problems of other people after she herself had just…
But she didn't want to go into that now. She no longer
cared. That chapter of her life was over. Bulma sighed. That wasn't worth
getting depressed about.
She was young, beautiful and had her whole life ahead of
her. She suddenly felt better.
*I am the only heir to Capsule Corps. And I have
enough sense in my head to know when I am beaten. And I am far from beaten. *
She relaxed. Reaffirmation of who you were was one of the
best ways to lose your blues. While she had that little bit of stability in her
life she could ignore the yawning gap inside her spirit. But she was still
bored.
Her recent train of thought led her to think of another
being in the house that seemed to be acting differently. A bit depressed as
well. She couldn't really tell, of course, he never showed her what he was
really thinking… or did he? That was the problem. She didn't know how much of
his attitude was a façade, or even if that was his real face. However, she
didn't think that anyone could live being so… emotionless and cold. And she had
seen him show at least some emotion when he had been injured. And he
appeared to feel depression.
She didn't stop to wonder why she was following this
train of thought, although she subconsciously came to the conclusion that it
was because her mind was too bored. He didn't have any thing to affirm in the
way that she did, the storm incident showed that. So how was he dealing with
it? Maybe there was some secret Saiyan way that she didn't know about… but then
Goku never hid pain when he felt it. But then Goku wasn't raised on Vejiitasei.
* But then, neither was Vegeta. * She again ignored the feeling that
came with this, the pang of something, echoing hollowly in the void that
replaced the space Yamcha used to occupy. *Maybe he's not dealing with it. *
She thought, and frowned. She knew that it was bad to let whatever was
bothering you fester inside, because sooner or later it would take you over.
She decided that she would find the miserable alien and
go cheer him up. The last time she had seen him he had… jumped out the window.
That wasn't helpful. So, she decided to go to where he usually hung out and see
if she could find him around there. She began to walk towards the gravity
machine room.
Hope your happy peeps. That's all 4 now. Again I am very, very sorry for not getting this chapter out sooner, but I have been tied up and locked-down. I finally got rid of the writer's bock… thank you to everyone who gave me so much help. I couldn't have done this chapter without you (Hi to Prime Minister, Golden Shadow and any1 else who e's me)