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CHAPTER 4
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Qui-Gon, Padmé, Jarari, Shananakin, R2-D2 and Shananakin's mom are eating supper.
Padmé I can't believe there's still slavery in the galaxy. The Republic's ant-slavery laws-
Shananakin's Mother: The Republic doesn't exist out here, we must survive on our own.
Silence.
Padmé: I feel kinda stupid, could someone say something?
SHANANAKIN: Anyone ever see a pot race?
Padmé: What's a pot race?
Qui-Gon: Where people sit on a toilet seat attached to two really big engines, very fast, very dangerous.
SHANANAKIN: I'm the only human who can do it!
Qui-Gon: You must have Jedi reflexes if you race pots.
SHANANAKIN: Jedi reflexes?
Qui-Gon: Yeah, like this.
Jarari uses his tongue to grab food, Qui-Gon grabs it and ties it to a chair.
SHANANAKIN: You're a Jedi aren't you?
Qui-Gon: Er, uh, no, uh… I just have, uh, Jedi reflex.
SHANANAKIN: Where'd you get that laser stick?
Qui-Gon: Yes I had a feeling you were eyeing my laser stick. Well, I can see there's no fooling you. I am a Jedi, but my ship has crashed and I need a new hyperdrive generator from our friend, Swatto.
SHANANAKIN: How convenient that I have a pot and there's an annual race coming up in just two days, with the prize money you could…
Shananakin's Mom: Shananakin, Swatto won't let you race…
SHANANAKIN: Come on, Mom. You just don't want me to die. I love pot racing.
Padmé: Qui-Gon doesn't want to put your son in danger.
Qui-Gon: Sure, I do.
Padmé: We'll find some other way.
Shananakin's Mom: No, there is no other way. None that will speed up the plot. He can help you. He was meant to help you.
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Padmé: Are you sure about this? Trusting our lives to a strange boy who builds naked robots? I- I mean, the Queen - would not approve.
Qui-Gon: You- I mean - the Queen doesn't need to know.
Padmé: Well the Queen - I mean I - don't approve.
Qui-Gon walks into Swatto's shop.
Swatto: The boy says you wanna sponsor him in da race.
Qui-Gon: Yes, I have, uh, "acquired" a pot in a game of chance.
Swatto: Well, I hope you didn't keel anyone I know for it… But you only have Republic credit cards, it costa entry feee, huh!
Qui-Gon: Well, I was hoping you'd front the cash for the entry, and If we win, you keep all the money, minus the cost of the parts we need. And if we lose, you keep my ship.
He flicks on a hologram of the Queen's ship.
Qui-Gon: A brand-new Nubian. A real chick magnet.
Swatto: Well, I uh…
He looks at Qui-Gon then the ship.
Swatto: DEAL!
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Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon are talking on the comlinks.
Obi-Wan: What if this plan fails Master, we could be stuck here a very looong time. I mean a loooooong time. A looooooo-
Qui-Gon flips of the comlink as Shananakin's mom comes up behind him.
Qui-Gon: You should be very proud of your son.
Shananakin's Mom: Yes, I am, but sometimes he scares me.
Shananakin and his friend are working on the pot. Jarari is fiddling with the engines.
SHANANAKIN: Hey Jarari, watch out for those energy binders.
Jarari: Say what?
He gets zapped.
Jarari: AWOAH! Dey mithe thung! Mithe thung this thad! Mithe thung!
C-PPO: That Jarari creature is a little… odd.
Jarari gets his finger stuck in the engine.
Jarari: Thokee, graith! Thow mithe thiger thith thuck! Thood thom theeki thepee?
Qui-Gon: Let's get this thing started!
Jarari: Tho waithe!
Shananakin is about to turn on the engine and kill Jarari without second thought, Padmé takes pity on him and helps him out, much to many peoples displeasure.
Jarari: Thank thoo!
Shananakin flips the switch, the pot racer works.
SHANANAKIN: It's working! It's working!
Shananakin's mom watches with a bit of sadness.
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Qui-Gon is drawing blood from Shananakin's arm with a needle.
SHANANAKIN: Qui-Gon, what're you doing?
Qui-Gon: Eh, I'm checking your blood for midichloria- I mean infections. Now get to bed.
Shananakin gets to bed. Qui-Gon pulls out the comlink.
Qui-Gon: Obi-Wan?
Obi-Wan: Yes Master?
Qui-Gon: Check this blood I'm sending you for midichlorians.
Obi-Wan: Over a comlink?
Qui-Gon: Sure, there should be a midichlorian counter on the ship's computer, they put them in all computers, now.
Obi-Wan: Please hold.
Qui-Gon waits a little bit.
Obi-Wan: Blimey!
Qui-Gon: What?
Obi-Wan: It's way off the charts! Even Master Yoda's midichlorians aren't THAT high.
Qui-Gon: Nobody's are.
Obi-Wan: What does that mean?
Qui-Gon: I don't know.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
A sinister Sith spaceship soars over the spherical surface of the sandy planet of Tattospleen. It lands. Darth Maul comes out her looks around and presses a few buttons on his wrist band. Three probe droids come out of his ship.
Darth Maul: Fly my little monkeys, fly.
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Qui-Gon is in the pot racer garage with Swatto and Jarari.
Swatto: I wanna see this spaceship as soon as the race is over.
Qui-Gon: Patience, my blue friend. You'll get your winnings before the suns set. And I'll be cruisin' the galaxy in my brand new Nubian chick magnet.
Swatto: Not if that chick magnet is belonging to ME, I think. I warn you now, no funny bees-nus.
Qui-Gon: You don't think Shananakin can win?
Swatto: Don't get me wrongo, I have GREAT FAITH in the boy, I just think he lose by first lap. Sebublug here is going to win, I think.
Qui-Gon: Why would you think that?
Swatto: He ALWAYS wins! I'm betting big money on Sebublug.
Qui-Gon: I'll take that bet!
Swatto: What bet?
Qui-Gon: I'll wager my brand new pot against say, the boy and his mother.
Swatto: No pot is worth two slaves, not by a long shot!
Qui-Gon: The boy then.
Swatto: Well, we'll let fate decide, eh? I happen to have a chance cube here. Blue - it's the boy, red - his mother.
He tosses the coin, Qui-Gon uses the Force to make it land on blue.
Swatto: GARGH! You won the small toss outlander, but you won't when the race! GARGH!
Padmé, R2-D2, C-PPO, Shananakin, his mom and his friend come up. Swatto flies by.
Swatto: Boona pa keesa, shaga wa sticka ma toga HAHAHAHAHAHA!
SHANANAKIN: What'd he mean by that?
Qui-Gon: I'll tell you when you're a little older.
Shananakin's Friend: I'm sure you'll finish this time.
Padmé: Finish what?
Shananakin's Friend: The race of course.
Padmé: You've never finished a race before?
SHANANAKIN: Well, technically… no.
Padmé: Great…
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The arena is packed. A two-headed announcer, uh, announces.
Fodé: Welcome to the Boonta Eve Classic, pot race fans.
Beed: And lovely weather we're having today.And the drunken fool, Teemto Pagagalees!The galaxy-famous Gass Gonzo!And it looks like Cloginaros is having engine trouble also!And the fans are going crazy to catch it.Neck and neck!Toe by toe!And the Nuts are going to sleep!
CHAPTER 4
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Qui-Gon, Padmé, Jarari, Shananakin, R2-D2 and Shananakin's mom are eating supper.
Padmé I can't believe there's still slavery in the galaxy. The Republic's ant-slavery laws-
Shananakin's Mother: The Republic doesn't exist out here, we must survive on our own.
Silence.
Padmé: I feel kinda stupid, could someone say something?
SHANANAKIN: Anyone ever see a pot race?
Padmé: What's a pot race?
Qui-Gon: Where people sit on a toilet seat attached to two really big engines, very fast, very dangerous.
SHANANAKIN: I'm the only human who can do it!
Qui-Gon: You must have Jedi reflexes if you race pots.
SHANANAKIN: Jedi reflexes?
Qui-Gon: Yeah, like this.
Jarari uses his tongue to grab food, Qui-Gon grabs it and ties it to a chair.
SHANANAKIN: You're a Jedi aren't you?
Qui-Gon: Er, uh, no, uh… I just have, uh, Jedi reflex.
SHANANAKIN: Where'd you get that laser stick?
Qui-Gon: Yes I had a feeling you were eyeing my laser stick. Well, I can see there's no fooling you. I am a Jedi, but my ship has crashed and I need a new hyperdrive generator from our friend, Swatto.
SHANANAKIN: How convenient that I have a pot and there's an annual race coming up in just two days, with the prize money you could…
Shananakin's Mom: Shananakin, Swatto won't let you race…
SHANANAKIN: Come on, Mom. You just don't want me to die. I love pot racing.
Padmé: Qui-Gon doesn't want to put your son in danger.
Qui-Gon: Sure, I do.
Padmé: We'll find some other way.
Shananakin's Mom: No, there is no other way. None that will speed up the plot. He can help you. He was meant to help you.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Padmé: Are you sure about this? Trusting our lives to a strange boy who builds naked robots? I- I mean, the Queen - would not approve.
Qui-Gon: You- I mean - the Queen doesn't need to know.
Padmé: Well the Queen - I mean I - don't approve.
Qui-Gon walks into Swatto's shop.
Swatto: The boy says you wanna sponsor him in da race.
Qui-Gon: Yes, I have, uh, "acquired" a pot in a game of chance.
Swatto: Well, I hope you didn't keel anyone I know for it… But you only have Republic credit cards, it costa entry feee, huh!
Qui-Gon: Well, I was hoping you'd front the cash for the entry, and If we win, you keep all the money, minus the cost of the parts we need. And if we lose, you keep my ship.
He flicks on a hologram of the Queen's ship.
Qui-Gon: A brand-new Nubian. A real chick magnet.
Swatto: Well, I uh…
He looks at Qui-Gon then the ship.
Swatto: DEAL!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon are talking on the comlinks.
Obi-Wan: What if this plan fails Master, we could be stuck here a very looong time. I mean a loooooong time. A looooooo-
Qui-Gon flips of the comlink as Shananakin's mom comes up behind him.
Qui-Gon: You should be very proud of your son.
Shananakin's Mom: Yes, I am, but sometimes he scares me.
Shananakin and his friend are working on the pot. Jarari is fiddling with the engines.
SHANANAKIN: Hey Jarari, watch out for those energy binders.
Jarari: Say what?
He gets zapped.
Jarari: AWOAH! Dey mithe thung! Mithe thung this thad! Mithe thung!
C-PPO: That Jarari creature is a little… odd.
Jarari gets his finger stuck in the engine.
Jarari: Thokee, graith! Thow mithe thiger thith thuck! Thood thom theeki thepee?
Qui-Gon: Let's get this thing started!
Jarari: Tho waithe!
Shananakin is about to turn on the engine and kill Jarari without second thought, Padmé takes pity on him and helps him out, much to many peoples displeasure.
Jarari: Thank thoo!
Shananakin flips the switch, the pot racer works.
SHANANAKIN: It's working! It's working!
Shananakin's mom watches with a bit of sadness.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Qui-Gon is drawing blood from Shananakin's arm with a needle.
SHANANAKIN: Qui-Gon, what're you doing?
Qui-Gon: Eh, I'm checking your blood for midichloria- I mean infections. Now get to bed.
Shananakin gets to bed. Qui-Gon pulls out the comlink.
Qui-Gon: Obi-Wan?
Obi-Wan: Yes Master?
Qui-Gon: Check this blood I'm sending you for midichlorians.
Obi-Wan: Over a comlink?
Qui-Gon: Sure, there should be a midichlorian counter on the ship's computer, they put them in all computers, now.
Obi-Wan: Please hold.
Qui-Gon waits a little bit.
Obi-Wan: Blimey!
Qui-Gon: What?
Obi-Wan: It's way off the charts! Even Master Yoda's midichlorians aren't THAT high.
Qui-Gon: Nobody's are.
Obi-Wan: What does that mean?
Qui-Gon: I don't know.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
A sinister Sith spaceship soars over the spherical surface of the sandy planet of Tattospleen. It lands. Darth Maul comes out her looks around and presses a few buttons on his wrist band. Three probe droids come out of his ship.
Darth Maul: Fly my little monkeys, fly.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Qui-Gon is in the pot racer garage with Swatto and Jarari.
Swatto: I wanna see this spaceship as soon as the race is over.
Qui-Gon: Patience, my blue friend. You'll get your winnings before the suns set. And I'll be cruisin' the galaxy in my brand new Nubian chick magnet.
Swatto: Not if that chick magnet is belonging to ME, I think. I warn you now, no funny bees-nus.
Qui-Gon: You don't think Shananakin can win?
Swatto: Don't get me wrongo, I have GREAT FAITH in the boy, I just think he lose by first lap. Sebublug here is going to win, I think.
Qui-Gon: Why would you think that?
Swatto: He ALWAYS wins! I'm betting big money on Sebublug.
Qui-Gon: I'll take that bet!
Swatto: What bet?
Qui-Gon: I'll wager my brand new pot against say, the boy and his mother.
Swatto: No pot is worth two slaves, not by a long shot!
Qui-Gon: The boy then.
Swatto: Well, we'll let fate decide, eh? I happen to have a chance cube here. Blue - it's the boy, red - his mother.
He tosses the coin, Qui-Gon uses the Force to make it land on blue.
Swatto: GARGH! You won the small toss outlander, but you won't when the race! GARGH!
Padmé, R2-D2, C-PPO, Shananakin, his mom and his friend come up. Swatto flies by.
Swatto: Boona pa keesa, shaga wa sticka ma toga HAHAHAHAHAHA!
SHANANAKIN: What'd he mean by that?
Qui-Gon: I'll tell you when you're a little older.
Shananakin's Friend: I'm sure you'll finish this time.
Padmé: Finish what?
Shananakin's Friend: The race of course.
Padmé: You've never finished a race before?
SHANANAKIN: Well, technically… no.
Padmé: Great…
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
The arena is packed. A two-headed announcer, uh, announces.
Fodé: Welcome to the Boonta Eve Classic, pot race fans.
Beed: And lovely weather we're having today.And the drunken fool, Teemto Pagagalees!The galaxy-famous Gass Gonzo!And it looks like Cloginaros is having engine trouble also!And the fans are going crazy to catch it.Neck and neck!Toe by toe!And the Nuts are going to sleep!