Love Child ~ Part 4
He decided they should be alone for this part. He thanked Hyper and Sally for their support, but knew that at the end of the day it was down to him. He was the one who had messed up six years ago. He decided that if he had never met Rachel then none of this would be happening now. Chloe would have had a stable and loving family and not have her life constantly filled with strangers.
"Is my mum coming back?" Chloe started asking.
"No, Chloe, no she isn't," he replied carefully.
"Where is she?"
"I don't know," he paused. "There was an accident last night, she was hurt pretty bad and we couldn't do anything to make her better again."
"Is she coming back?"
Adam shook his head and hugged the little girl.
"Has she gone to Heaven?" Chloe asked.
"Yeah," Adam replied. "Yeah I think she has."
She didn't cry as he held her in
his arms. He wondered if she really understood what he had been trying
to tell her.
"I don't think she understands," Adam was telling Elaine.
"She probably doesn't," Elaine agreed. "What are you going to do?"
"Look after her, like I promised. At least then I can do something right by Rachel!"
"But what about work, and the pub?" Elaine asked.
Adam glared at her. "Don't you care?"
"Of course I care, I'm just being practical. Chloe needs her father," Elaine tried to point out.
"I've been more of a father to her than Paul has!" Adam argued. "I can't send her to live with someone she has never even met!"
"Call him, Adam," Elaine urged. "He has a right to know what's going on."
Adam sighed. At the moment he had four rest days, but it did start to cross his mind what would happen when he started on watch again. Rachel had managed only because she had spent a fortune on childminders. She'd had trouble trying to find one who would look after Chloe during a night duty, she reckoned she had been lucky to find Sheila.
Rachel had arrived from New Zealand with her boyfriend Paul. He had been a businessman, transferred to the London branch of whomever it was he worked for. Adam had met Rachel when she had been working in a supermarket, which had flooded and the fire brigade had been called out. Rachel reckoned she needed to change her life, he joked she should join the Fire Brigade, he was surprised when she actually did!
Fate had drawn them together when they were posted at the same station. She was still seeing Paul but one night things had got out of control.
The Watch had gone on a beano to Brighton. Paul had tagged along but Rachel had managed to slip away from him in favour of a walk along the beach with Adam, in the soft glow of the evening sunshine set in the pink sky.
"I don't think Paul understands me sometimes," Rachel confided.
"Why?" Adam enquired. "I thought you two were love's young dream!"
"Maybe we were… once. He's too busy with work, and he keeps dropping hints about wanting to go back home."
"And you don't want to?"
"I like England."
"Why?!" he wondered. "What is there to like about England?!"
"There's plenty of hunky guys."
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah, in fact I'm with one right now…"
They stopped under the shade of the tall metal structure of the pier.
"I don't date girls with boyfriends…" he started.
"Who said anything about a date?"
"Or work colleagues."
"If you don't want to Adam…" she started to walk away.
He stopped her. "No… I mean… yeah…" he paused. "What about Paul?"
His question was left unanswered as she wrapped her lips around his, closely followed by shoving her tongue down his throat.
From the promenade, Paul glanced
down towards the pier. He saw a young couple embracing, and didn't give
them a second thought. He looked away again. Then something made him look
back. He swallowed hard.
"You know what you were saying about you not dating work colleagues…" Rachel started as they sat down in the mess together a few weeks later.
"Um yeah…" Adam took a drink of tea.
"Well you don't need to worry about that anymore."
"Why?"
"I'm leaving."
"Are you going after Paul?"
"I'm pregnant."
He put the cup down on the table, splashing the remains of the tea over the table. "Do what?!"
She stood up and left the mess. He left his cup on the table to follow her.
"Rachel!"
He didn't get any further as they had got a shout.
He tried to talk to her about it, but it was difficult in front of the rest of the Watch. None of them knew what was, or had been, going on. Or if they did, they hadn't said anything about it. Paul had left her, telling her that he knew all about her and Adam. He had gone back to New Zealand, she had decided her life was in London.
Now she had dropped this bombshell on him. He didn't know what to think. He had tried confiding in Elaine, not that she was much help. She reckoned he needed to find out the truth about the child's paternity, one way or another. He told Rachel that whatever the outcome he would be there for her. He knew what it was like to grow up in a disjointed family, an absent mother and a father who was only around when he was let out for good behaviour. He felt it was something no child should have to go through.
Rachel had been touched by his concern, but had assured him that the baby belonged to Paul. He still wasn't a hundred per cent certain about that, maybe the baby had been born late…
Paul didn't want to know when Rachel tried to tell him. He had convinced himself that Adam was the father and refused to come back to England. Adam had then taken it upon himself to become a substitute father to the little girl, maybe it was just an attempt to rid himself of the guilt he had for driving her real father away. After his own experiences, he felt that every child needed some sort of father figure. Rachel had agreed and he became "Uncle Adam".
He started by going round every day, Rachel thought he was smothering her, so he decided to lay off. The visits slowly became few and far between, until they stopped altogether. Rachel started back at work, he wanted to give them money but there came a point when she refused to take it. She said she felt that she needed to provide for Chloe herself, and had then gone on to say, maybe a little harshly, that there was nothing between them anymore. He considered himself dumped.
They had only met up again recently when Rachel transferred to neighbouring station Shadbrook. She had made it clear that they couldn't pick up where they left off. At least they could still be friends, he had got to know Chloe again. It surprised him how well Rachel had been coping with shift work and bringing up a child. She reckoned it had been hard, but then told him that she was glad he had been there at the beginning. She said she didn't know how she would have managed without him.
Sometimes he found her difficult to work out. She made it clear that she didn't want a relationship yet she continued to flirt with him. He then started to wonder if that was really what was happening, or if it was just what he wanted to happen. He decided to stick with the "just being friends", it proved to be much less hassle for everyone involved.
He had taken Chloe out for the day when Sheila, the childminder, had fallen ill with some 24-hour bug. Rachel had been working and he had a day off to recover from a particularly nasty shout the day before. He knew Chloe had enjoyed spending time with him. He took her to London Zoo and Madame Tussauds, then on the London Eye. She commented that her mum never had time to take her out like this. They paid a quick visit to the Aquarium across the River from Westminster, and finished in McDonald's where Chloe told him that this had been the best day of her life.
He was touched by the comment from
the six-year-old.
London's Burning – Love Child © Karen Moody 05/05/2002