Hating The Phoenix

By Kalika

Rating: R, for violence, swearing and everything else

Disclaimer: Umm...ok, so Joss called me last night and spent two hours screaming at me about how I don't own BTVS. Shocking, isn't it?

Credits: Lyrics are by Alison Krauss & Union Station, Kanno Youko, Mariah Carey, BSSM, Craig David

Part 2 -- Dog Eat Dog

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And now she awakes to another gray day

In her big Blue World

And her room's a tiny cage

For Golden balls

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It wasn't like they were kissing or anything. Just hugging. But hugging was good. Like kissing, but not that good.

Buffy and Angel stood on her front porch, arms encircled around each other. The slayer's head was resting on Angel's shoulder; her eyes closed in bliss. He was burying his face in her hair. The dim light above them cast an orange glow on their faces.

Spike thought his world had dropped when Buffy left him. It just dropped even further, plunging itself into the depths of the darkness, swallowed whole by the Thief of Souls. Then it came back. He couldn't explain it.

Buffy left him. But she had done it gently, as if she was afraid she might hurt him. And he hated it. He knew what she intended and it burned him inside. Everything hurt. He didn't believe it. He didn't believe his grand-sire had stolen his girl. Buffy hadn't known he has even there. But she had left him. And the sorrow he felt woke him up. Spike wasn't going to beg her anymore. He waited. She could come back.

The flowers were wrinkling now.

He turned back.

And walked away.

The vampire's fury at Angel was nothing compared to his anger at the world. The poof thought he could just waltz in and seduce Buffy again. He was not mad at Buffy. He loved her too much. There was not a moment he didn't think about her. It was almost unhealthy.

But he knew his Buffy had not turned to Angel.

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In her perfect little world, Buffy would sense something was wrong. The feeling vibrated off her former lover. He hadn't come here just to see her. He had come here with news. And it wasn't good.

Despite her gut intentions, she didn't want to be upset.

Pulling back from Angel, everything crashed down on her. She reared back, and smacked on the temple with her fist. Hard.

He hollered, holding his head as he staggered backwards. Angel looked up to see Buffy's fuming expression. He knew she would be mad. She was easily readable, especially for one who had known her for so long. Her fists clenched, nails almost drawing blood along the smooth surface of her skin. The blonde had changed, so much, he barely knew her. Her hair was short, and she seemed incredibly mature, so unlike the little girl he had once loved.

This was not her.

He couldn't blame her. She had gone through so much. What was it like dying and arriving in Heaven, only to be pulled out? He would never know. But Buffy did. And Buffy wanted it. She hungered for it, so much that she ran to Spike. Angel suspected she didn't know he knew about his childe and her, but he did. Cordelia could prove her usefulness sometimes.

"What. Are you doing here?" The slayer seethed. How could he just show up?

Angel imaged she could make a great dragon of some sort. Her wrath would burn up the world. "Buffy, listen, I'm here to help."

"Help? Help what? Did Willow call you? Did she say I came back wrong? Is that why you're here?"

"No, Buffy. Not to help you." He paused, unsure how to answer her. "Spike. I'm here to help Spike." He flinched, afraid of her reaction.

Her anger seemed to grow, if possible. He watched as she mouthed the word 'Spike?'

Buffy was ready for anything from Angel. Anything. But nothing had prepared her for this. Angel hated Spike and Spike hated Angel. Spike? All of a sudden, she launched herself at him. He knew. He knew about her and Spike. How could he? How could he turn this against her?

A pair of arms held her back. The nails were polished a deep crimson. Neat, clean, and attached to strong fingers. Slayer fingers. Buffy heard a small chuckle behind her. Not really joyous, but an amusing laugh. Insulted, Buffy whipped around, her stake in hand.

Faith stood with her arms crossed, a big smile plastered on her bright face. Her hair wasn't brown anymore, it was a brilliant shade of blood-red. Her mouth flew open and out came a pink bubble, on which she smacked loudly. Buffy heard Angel sigh behind her. Faith cocked her red head to the side and looking triumphantly at her. Stupid girl. She thought. She watched as her face hardened.

"Hey, B." The slayer grinned, showing her bubblegum at the side of her mouth.

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"So why are you here?"

He looked up. "Huh? I thought I just told you outside. Spike's in trouble."

"No, I meant if you're here to help Spike, why didn't you just go warn him at his crypt?" Buffy crossed her arms. Faith was in the kitchen, fixing herself a brandy and Angel his blood. Buffy had politely refused anything.

The two stood in the doorway of her quite house. She was glad Dawn was at Cara's.

"Spike hates me." Angel replied.

Buffy snorted. "Is that why you want to help him so bad?" She said mockingly. "Don't want him to hate you?" She raised an eyebrow.

"No." He said abruptly, she was a bit taken back.

A moment passed and Angel realized she wanted an answer. He wasn't sure how to tell her.

"So?"

He pursed his lips together. She had to know.

"Because it concerns the safety of humanity."

That caught her attention. Buffy's head snapped up and met his piercing gaze. It wasn't a game. This was serious business. His dark haunting eyes brokw off her focus. She rubbed her own eyes, her head suddenly starting to hurt.

"But...that's impossible, Spike can't hurt a living thing." 'Except me' she thought bitterly.

"About the chip..." Angel lifted her face. Concern was written all over his brooding face.

"What chip?" Faith walked up behind the two, holding identical red glasses. She handed one to Angel. "Here's your blood."

"Spike's chip." Buffy answered, quite annoyed. Didn't Faith know? "The one that keeps from hurting humans." She raised her eyebrow at Angel.

Faith noticed. She turned around. "You didn't tell her yet?" She asked, surprised.

Angel's jaw tightened. "No." He simply answered, revealing all his negative feelings to her. She could clearly see he was uncomfortable with the current situation. Reaching out, she put a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

"You want me to break the news?" She asked quietly, her expression softening.

"Tell me what?" Buffy leaned in closer to the couple. "Don't try to hide anything from me." She glared at them. Faith took her arm.

"Sit down, B." She frowned, but obeyed.

"Well?"

Faith hesitated, not sure of how to put it. She didn't want to freak her out. Even she was scared of the small blonde. Twirling her straw in her drink around, she stalled her question.

"Well?" Buffy asked again, her voice raising the slightest bit. It was itching not knowing what was going on. Faith stood in front her her, taunting her, making the itch grow and worsen.

Sighing, Faith started.

"Spike's chip," she begin. Buffy narrowed her eyes. "Was put in by the Initiative. It's purpose, in the beginning, was to malfunction pain, creating it when Spike hurt someone or tried to feed. But-"

"Wait, in the beginning?" Buffy cut in. "What's that suppose to mean?" She asked, confused.

"Let her finish, Buffy." Angel grew annoyed. He took a sip.

Faith smirked. "Well, we actually bumped into the lab where they performed the operation on Billy-Boy. An-"

"And why were you there?"

"Cordy had a vision." Angel straightened up.

"We snuck in. And we have information. On Spike's chip. And it's intent. Apparently, the chip is not what it seems to be. This bitch, she wore a red suit, talked of Hostile 17." She paused. "The thing is, the chip is meant to bring him to their side. The chip will turn him into a demon, more evil than he already is. It'll make him stronger, not exactly invincible, but pretty close. They neutered him at first to throw you off track."

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I'm walking away

From troubles in my life

I'm walking away

I'll find a better day

I'm walking away

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Step by step he made his way back to his crypt.

He would find a way. Spike would always find a way back to his Buffy. His first impression upon seeing Angel were ridiculous. Buffy didn't leave him for the wanker. He almost laughed at himself, thinking that she had. How did he ever suspect such a irrational idea?

Spike knew Buffy better than anyone. No matter how much she hated him, she would always run to him for comfort. The kind only he could give. Even if she didn't love him, he was the only one who could help. Spike was like the dew that helps the morning glory blossom, the wind that bent the bamboo. If only she could understand, if only she could see, then his slayer would stop running and finally accept him. Maybe then Buffy would begin to realize how much he loved her. But he knew he wasn't right for her. She needed someone normal. Angel saw that and left. Spike wasn't going to leave. He wasn't like the others. And that made him even sadder.

Spike hummed a slow, sorrow-filled tune. Haunting and beautiful. He would drink until he collapsed. He would forget everything and dream about her again. Nothing would ever change the fact Buffy only used him. He knew it. It hurt.

In some ways, she was worse before she came back, before she started hiding behind him. Every little blue bubble of hope rose each night and popped come morning. But he had take it. He was strong and he would take it for Buffy.

So entranced in his thoughts, he didn't notice the solider boys behind him. The ones who zapped him and knocked him out.

All he knew was blackness.

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