Psymon looked out over the valley, barely able to see it under the morning mist. He took a long drag off his cigarette, then blew out the smoke overhead, looking up at the moon still visible in the sky. That's how he felt right now, visible and hollow. He sighed and looked back down. He couldn't even make out the powerlines he'd once torn down. He flicked the cigarette off into the mist and turned around to leave.

"I thought you wanted to talk," a voice said. Psymon looked up and saw Zoe standing there. Psymon looked back down, pretending to be doing something important with the saddlebag. She walked closer and set the bear down on the motercycle's seat. "That's what this was, right?"

"Yeah, but I didn't think you'd actually come," Psymon answered quietly.

"Well, I did," Zoe replied. "What did you want?"

"You're still mad at me?" Psymon asked, looking up at her finally.

"Yeah....no....I don't know, Psy," Zoe answered. "I cared..I care about you. Why did you go off and do that?"

"I don't know. I thought I needed....I need something more," Psymon sighed. "I just need it from you."

"I told you I'm not ready for that," Zoe replied, crossing her arms. "Is that why you let Marisol go after you?"

"Yeah, but she started trying to do more than kiss me, and I just couldn't. I want to wait till you're ready," the Canadian said, taking her hand in his. "I said I love you and I meant it. I'm sorry I hurt you, but I'll never hurt you again, whatever it takes."

"I don't know if I can commit, Psy," Zoe answered, voice starting to break from the tears she was choking back. "I've been hurt in the past. Not just by you, but other men. I don't know if I can trust."

"I know. I screwed up," Psymon answered, letting go of her hand. "Brodi was right."

"Brodi? Right about what?" Zoe asked.

"How did he put it? Oh, right. 'It's not the destination, but the journey. Don't put all your energy into one turn in life.' He's right, everything will play out as it will," Psymon replied.

"Just how is this suppose to play out, Psymon?" the young woman asked.

"I don't know. I want us to be together, but I don't think we will. I love you and you don't love me. I'm willing to wait, you don't even want to be near me," Psymon sighed, looking out at the valley. "I don't think I have to spell it out."

"What in the hell made you think I don't love you? That I don't want to be near you?" Zoe asked, making him look at her. "What's wrong with you, Psy?"

Psymon just looked at her. He wanted to tell her, but the voices were already starting to roar with laughter. He pressed his hand to his head, and squeezed his eyes shut. They were louder than usual, making him drop to his knees, unable to steady himself under the mental onslaught. He gasped in pain, his fingers now clawing into the dirt below him. He could hear them laughing, accusing him of failure, laughing, telling him he was nothing, laughing, always laughing. Psymon threw his head back, his hands at his temples, and screamed.



Zoe just stared at the screaming man in front of her, unsure of what to do exactly. She watched him get to his feet, screaming at someone to be quiet, slowly back toward the cliff. Fearing he'd fall, she ran toward him and grabbed for his hands. Psymon's eyes flew open and he shoved at Zoe, then turned to run, but Zoe tackled him. He fought with her, but she managed to get him pinned down enough.

"Snap out of it, Psymon!" Zoe cried, holding on tight. "Please."

"Stop it! Stop it!" Psymon screamed, thrashing under her. "Shut up!"

"What's wrong? Talk to me," the young woman pleaded. Psymon continued to fight with her, pushing up off the gound now, lifting her up. Zoe yelped as he threw her to the ground and rounded on her, pinning her down. She looked up at those icy blue eyes, but no longer saw recognition there. "Psy?"

"Z-zoe?" the Canadian asked, blinking, then touched her cheek gently. "I can't really hear you."

"What's wrong, Psy?" Zoe asked, trying to stay calm.

"They keep talking. I can't make them stop," Psymon said, closing his eyes and pressing his hands to his temples. Zoe sat up, trying to get out from under the man, but he grabbed her shoulders. "They want me to fail, Zoe."

"Psymon, calm down," Zoe said, putting her arms around him. The Canadian just laid his head on her shoulder and sobbed, one arm still covering his head, the other holding her close against him. Zoe rocked him gently, trying to ignore his weight where he was stradled across her legs. She soothed him, stroking his hair. "It's okay. It's going to be okay."

"I'm scared, Zoe," Psymon whispered. "They've never been this bad before."

"We'll get help. I don't understand what's happening, though," the punky boarder replied. Psymon shifted his weight, hugging her closer.

"I hear voices. Sometimes they just laugh at me, but sometimes they like to remind me how much of a failure I am. Only one of them has ever been nice to me," he explained, pulling back and moving his hand arcoss his left pectoral where the word "pain" was scratched into it. "I always shrug it off as a tattoo, but it's really more like...cuts."

"Why did you do this?" Zoe asked, tracing the letters. Psymon covered her hand with one of his, shaking his head.

"I didn't. A guy I knew once did this to me. He was hit by a car. I saw the whole thing. I knealt n-next to him, but he w-was already too far gone. I a-asked him if he felt okay, and he p-picked up this broken piece of glass and scratched this w-word into my chest. N-next thing I knew, he was d-dead," Psymon answered softly, stuttering over his words. "My friend w-was just gone."

"It wasn't your fault, Psymon," Zoe said softly, pulling him back against her.

"I know it w-wasn't, but ever since it h-happened, I could just hear him t-telling me to be careful, to behave. He b-became like a conscience," Psymon replied, his speech becoming clearer, but his body still shook. Zoe held him tightly, trying to help him relax. She no longer minded his weight leaned against her, his legs still on either side of her thighs. She looked up at him, rubbing his back gently. Psymon just sighed and arched his back, then looked down at her. "You want me to get up, eh?"

"No offence, but you are sorta heavy," Zoe answered, smiling at him. Psymon murmured an apology and moved, swinging a leg over her legs so that he sat beside her. Zoe too his hand and leaned against him. "Quite a morning, I'd say."

"Not something I'd readily share again. I'm sorry you had to see that," Psymon answered. "It's passed now. I'll just go. I think we've said all we needed to." He started to get up, but Zoe knocked him down and tackled him, stradling his hips.

"Now you listen, you twit, I haven't gotten to tell my side of it. When do I get my say?" she asked, looking down into Psymon's icy blue eyes.

"I guess now is good," he replied, not moving. Zoe smirked.

"Fine. I had a lot to think about last night. I meant what I said earlier about not knowing if I can commit or trust. I've been hurt in the past, and I don't want to be hurt again. I thought it was you holding back ,but I realize now it was me. You've given so much of yourself to me. Told me things you've never told anyone else before. I'm an idiot for not seeing it before. I'm so afraid of placing trust in someone, I never noticed you were taking the first leap," Zoe said, leaning closer to Psymon's face. "You piss me off in way I never thought a man could before, but everytime I look at you, I want to be in your arms. When you're not around, all I can think about the next time I see you."

"I know how you feel, love. I never thought I'd settle down, but I feel calmness when I'm with you. I've always been the wild, the untamable, but now, I just want to be the man you see when you look at me. I'll go to a doctor, I'll get help. I'll--" Psymon babbled before Zoe stopped him with a kiss. She felt his arms around her holding her tight. She opened her mouth slightly as he pressed his tongue against her lips. Moaning softly, she wriggled into a more comfortable position as Psymon's hands moved down to her rear. This time she didn't pull away, but instead kissed him passionately, sucking gently at his tongue. She felt something under her move and pulled back, looking down.

"Um, my...you certainly liked this make-out session, didn't you?" Zoe asked playfully, looking and the bulge in Psymon's pants.

"We can stop if you want," he replied softly, then moaned as she caressed him. Zoe just laughed as he flopped back on the ground. He looked up at her. "Or you can just keep going and drive me wild."

"Well, I have always wondered the answer to the eternal question," Zoe answered, winking at him.

"Eh?" Psymon asked in proper stereotypical fashion. Zoe laid her hand over his crotch, then began unzipping his pants. He put his hand over her, stopping her. "You sure you want to do this?"

"Yeah," Zoe said, moving his hand away and unzipping his pant the rest of the way. She reached up and undid the button, listening to his sigh. Zoe pulled the front of his pants down, and definately got her answer. "Oh, so that's why you have no underwear lines when you were tight pants."

"Hard to have underwear lines with no underwear, love," he answered simply. He just looked at her, but Zoe wasn't quite sure of what his expression meant. She gave in, though, when he pulled her down for more kisses. His hands moved under her shirt, along her spine, but it no longer bothered her, not even when he started working at getting her bra undone. "How the hell..? Zoe, little help, eh?"

"Men," Zoe scoffed playfully. "And you're suppose to be the stronger sex." She sat up and pulled off her shirt, then undid the front clasp of her bra and slid it off. She gasped softly at Psymon's touch.

"Zoe, why are you doing this?" Psymon asked her, looking up into her eyes. Zoe placed her hands over his where he was gently cupping her breasts.

"Because I know now what I wasn't ready to admit before," she answered softly. She leaned down, looking into his eyes. "I love you, Psymon."

"Sweet mercy mayhem," he breathed softly. Zoe just laughed and kissed him. He rolled her over gently and looked down at her. She could see the relief in his eyes, but couldn't help but laugh again at his reaction. "So, are we back together now?"



Psymon smiled at Zoe, enjoying the sound of her laughter. He was glad that he could still make her smile after what she had witnessed. He was still worried she was rushing into this, though. Gently, he kissed her on her forehead, then trailed kisses down her neck and chest, finally stopping at her belly. He looked up at her.

"The heart tattoo is cute," he commented, kissing her belly button. Zoe just giggled. He sat up a bit and looked at her. "Zoe, I don't want you doing this because you feel obligated to now."

"I don't feel obligated. I just want to be close to you," Zoe answered. "And, yeah, maybe I'm a little curious about your body. Like why you never take the gloves off."

Psymon sat up and tugged the gloves off, then held his hands up, showing her the burn scars on his palms. He turned his hands so she could see the backs of them, a few burn scars showed there as well. His fingernail were an odd dark purple color. Psymon flinched as Zoe touched his hands, but allowed her to trace her fingertips over the scars. She looked up at him.

"What caused this?" she asked, concern showing in her blue eyes.

"The accident. All that electricity had to go somewhere. My fingernails will eventually return to normal," he replied. Zoe looked at his hands again, then kissed his fingertips, then laid his hands on her exposed breasts. Psymon looked up at her. "Is that an invitation?"

"Absolutely," Zoe answered, pulling him down on top of her.



Hours later, Psymon rode back up to camp on the motercycle. Zoe sat behind him, her arms locked around his waist. He pulled up to the winnebago and parked, then got off the bike and helped Zoe off. She hugged him tightly, and he just held her, nuzzling her cheek, neck, and shoulder. Their romp by the cliff had left them both tired, but Psymon figured it was well worth it. It hadn't been about experiencing each other's bodies for the first time as much as it had been about opening up and sharing with each other. They had discovered more than just how to give pleasure to each other, they had learned to love eah other for who they were. Zoe knew his private side, and he knew she wasn't as tough as she wanted people to think. It was like they had a secret between them, something only they knew. They had missed the roster call for the race, but had found something much more meaningful. Psymon looked down into Zoe's deep blue eyes and knew then that he had found something far more precious than any gold medal. Both had had problems with trust once before, but never again would they distrust each other.

End...?