All right kiddies, welcome back to Mortie's world...today B'Elanna gets to
the block...
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Mortimer Harren's Personal Log, stardate 56341.6
Unfortunately today was yet another waste of my time. I was placed on an Engineering detail with the ever pacific Lieutenant Torres. She seems to cause half of the damage herself, since when something goes wrong she either slaps the nearest panel (or crew member, if they happen to be closer). Take Joe Carey for example. Now that was a hell of a nice guy. Boring, and I think there was something going on between Wildman and him, but that's not the point. He had a spotless record, brilliant man, and he gets his nose crushed by our resident Klingon in a moment of rage. Of course, good old Bun O' Steel, in her infinite wisdom, weighed the decision for chief engineer carefully. Ex-Maquis criminal who has a penchant for violence, hates Starfleet and rules and has already mauled one crew member? Or starfleet Lieutenant with spotless record, placid demeanor, and who everybody likes. Well, let's just go for the first to make things interesting.
And don't get me started on her and that idiot Paris. While he plays with holographic, obsolete automobiles and calls himself grease monkey (more like spank the monkey when B'Elanna's in a bad mood, or so I've heard), he manages to catch himself likely the most normal woman on the ship? I mean, Janeway sounds and acts like a man with lipstick (hey, who said you couldn't have a cross dresser as a Starfleet Captain?) and Seven of Nine is - well, let's just say her appeal isn't in her brains. I mean, why not just rename Voyager The Love Boat? All anyone seems to care about is what's going on in B'Elanna and Tom's relationship. God, I thought she was violent and angry when I first met her. Now she's just become saccharine and nauseating. I love you, Tom. We're going to have a baby, Tom, what will we name it? Tiffanee? Bryttney? Kelli? Sindea? Why not dress the little bugger up in Baby Gap while you're at it.
What the hell was that thing with her father? Waah, I had a harsh childhood. Poor me, coddle me, I've been a strong Klingon for my entire life and because my daddy left me I'm going to melt now, thirty years after the fact. I don't think so. You know what I think? I think good old Tommy Boy was giving Seven a few too many looks, the ones that B'Elanna has a reputation for creaming him for, and she decided to try a new tactic. Self-indulgent whining, as far as I'm concerned. Cry me a river, Torres, then get back to Engineering, before the Captain decides to flog you. Then again, Klingons tend to be turned on by that sort of thing. Sicko.
Time for another synthehol...
=/\=
All righty, suggestions welcome, and I just want to apologize now that it took me a couple days to finish this! Sorry guys, I promise I'll get the next one up tomorrow! ;-)
=/\=
Mortimer Harren's Personal Log, stardate 56341.6
Unfortunately today was yet another waste of my time. I was placed on an Engineering detail with the ever pacific Lieutenant Torres. She seems to cause half of the damage herself, since when something goes wrong she either slaps the nearest panel (or crew member, if they happen to be closer). Take Joe Carey for example. Now that was a hell of a nice guy. Boring, and I think there was something going on between Wildman and him, but that's not the point. He had a spotless record, brilliant man, and he gets his nose crushed by our resident Klingon in a moment of rage. Of course, good old Bun O' Steel, in her infinite wisdom, weighed the decision for chief engineer carefully. Ex-Maquis criminal who has a penchant for violence, hates Starfleet and rules and has already mauled one crew member? Or starfleet Lieutenant with spotless record, placid demeanor, and who everybody likes. Well, let's just go for the first to make things interesting.
And don't get me started on her and that idiot Paris. While he plays with holographic, obsolete automobiles and calls himself grease monkey (more like spank the monkey when B'Elanna's in a bad mood, or so I've heard), he manages to catch himself likely the most normal woman on the ship? I mean, Janeway sounds and acts like a man with lipstick (hey, who said you couldn't have a cross dresser as a Starfleet Captain?) and Seven of Nine is - well, let's just say her appeal isn't in her brains. I mean, why not just rename Voyager The Love Boat? All anyone seems to care about is what's going on in B'Elanna and Tom's relationship. God, I thought she was violent and angry when I first met her. Now she's just become saccharine and nauseating. I love you, Tom. We're going to have a baby, Tom, what will we name it? Tiffanee? Bryttney? Kelli? Sindea? Why not dress the little bugger up in Baby Gap while you're at it.
What the hell was that thing with her father? Waah, I had a harsh childhood. Poor me, coddle me, I've been a strong Klingon for my entire life and because my daddy left me I'm going to melt now, thirty years after the fact. I don't think so. You know what I think? I think good old Tommy Boy was giving Seven a few too many looks, the ones that B'Elanna has a reputation for creaming him for, and she decided to try a new tactic. Self-indulgent whining, as far as I'm concerned. Cry me a river, Torres, then get back to Engineering, before the Captain decides to flog you. Then again, Klingons tend to be turned on by that sort of thing. Sicko.
Time for another synthehol...
=/\=
All righty, suggestions welcome, and I just want to apologize now that it took me a couple days to finish this! Sorry guys, I promise I'll get the next one up tomorrow! ;-)