Author: Kisutis
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No Longer Misunderstood - Chapter Three
If she didn't know better, she would have decided at the moment that the whole world had somehow become motionless, and she was the only thing functioning. Everything around her was silent, and if a pin were to drop, it seemed it would be heard throughout the entire Garden.
Gentle winds tangled with her golden tresses of hair, swirling them around as if it were attempting to play . . . Dual orbs of crystal blue examined the endless sea of gorgeous stars above her still figure . . . Yet, it didn't feel real.
Had someone found her? She could feel a presence, like the sensation you experience when you just know something is about to happen -- not a prediction, but a knowledge of it.
She came here often, usually to just contemplate some things, like now . . . But it hurt so much to do so. Hadn't her decisions in the past been carried out to the best of her ability? Had she failed again, just like she had failed being an instructor?
She folded her arms atop the smooth, stone railing, leaning her slender body against it as she closed her eyes, the thick coal eyelashes caressing her soft cheeks. Whoever was behind her was still there, but she didn't want to acknowledge their presence -- maybe they would leave.
. . . Maybe I don't want them to leave . . . ? . . .
The presence felt so familiar all of the sudden that she felt her heart jump into her throat. Surely, she had to be imagining things . . . And she bit her lip to keep it from trembling, knowing who she wished it would be.
". . . Instructor . . ."
Abruptly, the world all seemed to pick up its pace again, causing a tiny, surprised gasp to be emitted from her lips as the voice broke into her thoughts. She knew that voice -- Hyne, how couldn't she know that voice? It was forever imprinted in her mind, haunting every thought, each nightmare.
Slowly, almost hesitantly, she forced herself to turn around and face the figure standing only about a meter away. Her movement was practically soundless, never disturbing the silence that remained after his low voice had cut through the chilly air.
"Squall . . . ?"
She spoke his name like a question, although her thoughts had been upon him before he had said anything. What was he doing out here, especially if the party was still going on? Where was Rinoa?
. . . And he still refers to me as 'instructor,' even though I haven't been one for nearly a year . . .
"What are you doing out here? I thought you were at the party . . . ," she said, simply voicing her thoughts. What else could she say? She was completely confused as to why he had decided to come to the 'secret area,' of all places.
" . . . Not my thing, I guess," he answered, eyes narrowing slightly as his jaw clenched nervously. He hadn't expected to see her at all, and now he wished he would've just kept his mouth shut and left. "You should be in there enjoying yourself."
"I just wanted to be alone for a minute . . . ," she explained, simply and quickly, as she didn't want to reveal her true emotions by the slight quiver in her voice.
She turned away, eyes again focused on the breathtaking view before them. This just couldn't be right, feeling this way for a man who was taken. Her thoughts from before came back to her -- Squall is bound to Rinoa, and it can't be changed.
More importantly, Rinoa had been pleasant to her! What would people think of her if she were to betray that kindness? Sure, she had her own share of disagreements and arguments with Rinoa, but she definitely wouldn't consider the slightly younger girl an adversary.
. . . Just someone standing in the way of my love for Squall . . .
She was shocked at her own thoughts, and ashamed of it, as well. Because of the difficulties she had with her own mind, she wasn't sure how much longer she could hold on to what had previously been there . . . Memories, friends, even lessons she had learned the hard way.
Then, she couldn't even come up with an explanation of why she worried about these things. Squall had never had an interest in her, and just thinking of it made her want to leave so she could cry without him discovering how weak she was inside. Every moment without him, another piece of her would break away . . . Soon, there would be nothing left but useless rubble, and no one would remember who she had been before all of this . . . Before Rinoa came into the picture so abruptly.
. . . It's my fault, anyway . . . For not taking my only chance . . .
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Forgive me . . . I know I keep kinda leaving you guys hanging at the endings of the chapters. I'll have the fourth one up as quick as possible if you guys review, okay? I hope you like where this is going! Also, I'm sorry if I made Rinoa even more evil and bratty than she really is -- it's because I don't like her too much.
