And I don't feel like typing up the 'summary' of who is doing what at the moment even though I said I would in the last chapter, because I just wanna get to writing the good parts!! ^_^ Or the stupid, weird and downright hilarious "INFAMOUS KODOKU SCENE!" *Insert spooky music* Ehehe…This is what happens to a fanfiction author when separated from her friends over spring break. Well, I did talk to Voldy on the phone the night I wrote some of this because I needed ideas. But, whatever!!! I'll shut up and you can all read, yes?
Introducing…Part 2 of "Fushigi Yuugi Truth or Dare/Fanfiction Wars/Multi-Author Insanity!
In Which We Have Bad Jokes and Torture!?!
"Welcome to part 2!" announced a hyper SSJA. "On with the fic!"
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
(SSJA writing!)
"Can I buy some o' that?" SSJA asked, gesturing to Nakago's supply of kodoku.
After her purchase, Voldy calmly asked her why the hell she would buy an extremely large quantity of kodoku.
"Isn't it obvious?" the false Yui asked her friend. "To keep it away from Suboshi!"
"Oh." Said Voldy, feeling smarter.
"Oooh, a camera…" SSJA said, picking up a camera from a table—both of which had appeared due to a PLOT HOLE™! "Can anyone say 'blackmail'?" (and she proceeded to laugh evilly.)
"Blackmail!" chorused everyone, running to grab the camera from SSJA.
"Give me that!" Sakki yelled, because she was related to Nakago and wanted to annoy her friend with a blackmail tape.
[Insert inane ramblings of an author named Arcanine…]
[End inane ramblings…for now!]
SSJA began filming everything in sight. "Must…find…suitable…blackmail…" she was muttering. "We should probably continue the game."
And so, she announced loudly, "WE ARE CONTINUING THE GAME! YOU WILL SUFFER SOME HORRIBLE TORTURE IF YOU DON'T STOP WHAT YOU'RE DOING AND PLAY!"
"Yes, this means that all 'packing' must stop temporarily." SSJA added, hoping that saying 'temporarily' would free her from the wrath of Sakki.
Inane ramblings: I mean, really! I said 'You can't dare Tasuki to pack you when it's your turn." And she flips out! And it nearly leads to a scene that I would not like to read…I think I'll just shut up now. The bad thing about vacation is…YOU CAN'T PASS THE STORY! At the end of this fic, I'm going to probably have my revenge. I MUST PLAN MY REVENGE! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA—um, you know what? I think I'll just go to bed now… End of inane ramblings. [Yes, I wrote this in the fic. My other inane rambling was about something that only Voldy and Sakki would understand, so I didn't feel like typing it.]
"Oh, and did I mention…" 'Yui' added with a smile. "You can't repeat dares. This means no more kissing Nakago for Tamahome, no more daring Suboshi to—well, you get the point already, don't you?"
(Tamahome sighed in relief that he wouldn't experience the horror of kissing Nakago again. ICK! It must have been scary!!)
"Other people can dare you to 'pack' somebody, or dare somebody to 'pack' you, but you can't dare someone to pack you." SSJA explained. "Yeah, sure! That made a lot of sense…" (SARCASM.)
[Yeah! If that made sense, I want a cookie, or at least some M&Ms…]
(Nakago was handing out the last of his kodoku supply to anyone who wanted some.)
*The Evil Glint™ appears in The Kwaa's eyes! (Kwaa is just another one of my strange nicknames…Long story…) Yes, this time I remember what I'm thinking of…but I'm not tellin'!*
è Really crappy original sceneç
è Which has now been replaced with a well-written and hilarious scene!ç
è I now present to you…THE INFAMOUS SCENE!!ç
"But Yui-sama!" protested Suboshi, as Sakki identified potential packing targets.
'Yui' took Suboshi aside and whispered something to him. He ran out of the room and returned a few moments later with drinks for all of the authors/seishi.
"Sugar water?!" exclaimed SSJA happily, looking into her cup, which had clear liquid and small, floating particles. "YES!"
SSJA gulped down the drink. "Uhhh…too much sugar…I'm getting dizzy…"
"And little did she now that the water was ACTUALLY filled with KODOKU!" Sakki said, laughing because she's evil and related to Nakago.
Voldy picked up the camera to make a blackmail tape.
[Arcanine: *Does an "Oh-my-God-I-just-did-something-so-stupid" laugh* Oh my God! This line is soooo stupid! I couldn't resist putting it in, but it's stupid! *Helplessly rolling on the floor, laughing*]
"Yui-sama? Are you OK? Maybe you need to lie down. In a bed." Suboshi suggested. "With me."
Not quite yet on a sugar high, 'Yui' went into the bedroom with Suboshi.
"??!??" thought Sakki and Voldy.
Weird phrases came floating out of the room. [Arcanine: *snicker* This part's funny.]
"Hey, watch it!"
"Take THAT!"
"One more time?"
"OK!"
Unable to take it any longer, Sakki and Voldy broke the door down to reveal SSJA and Suboshi sitting, fully clothed, on the bed playing Super Smash Bros. Melee.
"I win again!" 'Yui' cheered.
"Yui-sama, one more time?" Suboshi asked.
"Uh—April Fools!" SSJA informed her friends. "That really was sugar water. Back to the game…"
"Hai!" agreed Suboshi.
~~End Infamous Kodoku Joke Scene of Doom that I wrote on April First as a joke~~
More inane rambling: Hah! Got you there! Those 'inappropriate' phrases are also yelled during games that involve fighting! MWAHAHA! That was the best scene! ^_^ (End inane rambling.)
"Got you guys again! Hey, look! Gullible is written on the ceiling!" 'Yui' said.
Half of the people in the room looked up.
"Hahahaha!" SSJA laughed. "I only wish we were at school today so I could play more jokes on you guys!"
Voldy and Sakki got slightly annoyed, and poor Suboshi was disappointed again.
4/2/02: HAPPY BIRTHDAY HOTOHORI!!
[4/3/02: SSJA decides to write more than just saying "Happy Birthday Hotohori!"]
And finally, the game would resume.
"Well?" SSJA asked. "Who wants to go first?"
(Miboshi was muttering to himself about "getting revenge on huffpuff for mocking his bladder and small anatomy. Bullshit, I just have a small nose!") Hehehe…hey, look! You got mentioned again!
Sakki was jumping up and down, waving her hands in the air and waiting to be picked. (Like the donkey in Shrek!)
"I know who should go!" Voldy said. "Sa—"
"Be quiet, Voldy!" SSJA said. "You know she's just going to write something hentai!"
"That's why I was gonna say it." Voldy smiled evilly and turned to Sakki. "What should we make her do now?"
"Well," Sakki said. "First…"
SSJA contemplated putting in earplugs to protect her mind from the hentai horrors, but then decided to just…
"While they talk, will somebody else please go?" SSJA asked.
~~
WE INTERRUPT THIS FIC TO BRING YOU THIS "SPECIAL" ANNOUNCEMENT!
VOLDY HAS GIVEN UP HAPLESS KILLING! (AFTER THE SMALL CHILDREN INCIDENT, OF COURSE. WE CAN ASSURE YOU THEY HAVE ALL BEEN DISPOSED OF…FOREVER!)
THANK YOU. WE NOW RESUME THE FIC.
~~
(At this point, I was talking on the phone with Voldy and writing down what we both came up with. See, I'm giving Voldy credit for stuff she made up. ANYWAY!!)
With a puff of puke-green smoke, a wizard-guy appeared.
"Hah. Hah." He said monotonously and everyone sweatdropped.
"I will now curse this fanfiction!" he exlaimed.
"Shit?" SSJA asked.
"Fuck?" Tasuki asked.
"Damn?" Sakki asked.
"Tiddlywinkies?" Voldy asked darkly.
"No." the wizard answered. "I am…Ingobobovinana!! And I will evilly curse your fanfiction!!"
[Arcanine's Stupid Note: The name MUST be said syllable by syllable because it sounds funny! Voldy was the one who decided to use that name, by the way.]
"I'm the only evil magician character in this fanfiction, thank you very much!" Voldy retorted.
"Actually, Voldy…" SSJA said. "You're one of the authors."
"Shut up." Voldy told her friend.
With a few evil magic words (that Voldy understood and looked worried about, for a change) there was a loud noise.
"POOF!"
"AHHH! A LOUD POOF!" SSJA yelled, and jumped into the air, nearly smacking her head on the ceiling of the room.
"Now you are all cursed to pick 'dare'!" the wizard yelled. "And for everyone else to pick the worst possible thing that could happen to you! And you must do it!"
"No wonder Voldy looked worried." Someone said. (Right Voldy? SOMEONE!)
SSJA almost ran to the corner of the room and yelled—um—something.
"Suboshi seemed somewhat pleased." Voldy commented.
[Arcanine: VOLDY COMMENTED! Hehehe…I don't know WHY but it just sounds funny…]
**THE ONLY REASON THIS IS HAPPENING IS SO I CAN HAVE MY REVENGE!!**
"SSJA, you're making me proud." Voldy said. (Because I'm learning the art of revenge. ^_^)
Everyone got into an argument over who would be dared/tortured first.
"Shut up!" yelled Voldy. "Or I'll kill you!" ßVoldy would like to say that this is not hapless killing because it's killing with a purpose.
Everyone suddenly shut up because Voldy probably meant it after the small children incident.
"Maybe I should make SSJA think…" Voldy said aloud.
"That's not quite torture." SSJA said, clapping her hands to her mouth. "Oops."
"That depends on what I'm making you think ABOUT!" Voldy retorted.
"That's not nice…" SSJA replied.
Out of ideas, Voldy decided NOT to torture SSJA. [Arcanine: It was also because I was talking to Voldy on the phone for too long and our parents made us hang up. Hehehe. No, really. We don't shut up. Ever! MWAHAHAHAHA!! I'm OK. I think.]
"MWAHAHAH!" exclaimed 'Yui'. "Payback for…
1. The Scene With The Wall (in Mysterious Crisis! Please read it??)
2. Nakago's "Dare" to Chichiri because that freaked me out.
3. Your Dare To Suboshi
4. Suggesting I have a part with The Scene With The Bathroom (even though Voldy wrote the actual scene).
5. Any of the numerous times you've said something hentai for the sole purpose of freaking me out.
6. Any time you've said hentai things for any reason.
7. The thing with the windowsill. [Readers: I wrote some fic that I never typed about the Seiryu seishi annoying the Suzaku seishi. And it had a stupid scene where I pop in as "Yui" at night and videotape Nakago asleep with a bright pink teddy bear or something. But when Sakki saw that it was at night and Suboshi was there and stuff…*Shudder* So, one more thing to add to my "List of Reasons to Get Revenge on Sakki".]
8. There probably is a number 8 but I can't think of it now.
Sakki laughed because (1) it had taken SSJA this long to come up with revenge and (2) she didn't think SSJA could come up with 'good' revenge/a 'good' dare/'good' torture. Shows what she knows! OK, this is a little odd, but this would NOT be a good thing for Sakki, I'm guessing.
"I dare you, Sakki, to take Tasuki to…" SSJA decreed. "Meet your parents! And he must stay the night without any packing the whole time! No packing AT ALL! MWAHAHA!"
Sakki glared at SSJA when she said 'without any packing' and looked about ready to kill her.
"You HAVE to! That weird evil wizard-guy said so!" SSJA said, sticking her tongue out at Sakki. "And we'll all be watching on a TV right here."
(A TV appeared, and al the seishi stared at it in wonder, as Voldy explained the 'mysterious new THING'.)
"Sayonara!" SSJA told her 'friend' who by now was ready to commit a murder. "Have fun! Oh wait, you CAN'T!"
(SSJA likes to write late at night and get REVENGE…)
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"This is Tasuki." Sakki informed her parents.
"Nice ta meet ya!" Tasuki said, showing off his fangs.
SSJA will not go into much detail 'cause she doesn't know Sakki's parents or anything about Sakki's house. Hehehe. Um, so I'm only going to write some random scenes. Yeah. Keep reading!
Back in the room (of doom), Voldy and SSJA laughed when Tasuki offered to help cook.
"REKKA SHINEN!"
"YOU BURNT THE FOOD!" yelled Sakki's mom, chasing him around the house.
"Oh, great…" mumbled Sakki.
~`~`~`~`
"So, Tasuki, what do you do?" asked Sakki's dad.
"Well, first, I used ta be the boss of a buncha bandits, but then I let Kouji have the position when I went ta help the Suzaku no Miko…" Tasuki explained.
~`~`~`~`
"No packing Tasuki…no packing Tasuki…no packing Tasuki…" Sakki was repeating to herself over and over as she tried to go to sleep.
Tasuki was in the next room, passed out because he sneaked in some sake.
"Must—not—pack—Tasuki!" Sakki nearly yelled.
~`~`~`~`
"You think we should hit her over the head so she'll fall asleep, or do we want to watch her panic?" SSJA asked Voldy.
The answer was obvious, because Sakki was still repeating "No packing Tasuki" to herself two hours later, while staring at the closed door of her room.
Tasuki woke up and looked around. "Where's Sakki? Oh yeah, no packing! Aw, fuck! Or not."
(Get it? No fuck. Heheh. Bad jokes.)
A short while later, Sakki fell asleep and almost sleepwalked to Tasuki. In her sleep, she kept muttering "Tasuki…".
That annoying bird that lives outside SSJA's window that wouldn't let her go to sleep the day/night/whatever she had insomnia began chirping bright and early. [Arcanine's note: Yeah! The damn bird was chirping at like 6 AM! I was trying to get a few hours of sleep in the morning, but NO! The damn thing didn't shut up. And then, when I started yelling at it, my mom came in and yelled at me for waking her up. Hehehe. "Stupid bird…It's all your fault…"]
"MORNING!" yelled Sakki in a psycho-ish way, and she used Author Powers to transport herself and Tasuki back to the place where everyone was. Of course, everyone was asleep, so Sakki took Tasuki into a bedroom.
"I don't wanna wake up!" SSJA complained, putting in earplugs so she didn't have to hear Sakki and Tasuki. "When will they stop?"
"They've been at it for…" Voldy said, holding up a stopwatch. "Uh…it's broken! I don't know."
"Wake me when they're done…" muttered SSJA to Voldy/the seishi in the room.
They eventually DID finish, and everyone…ate! Yum! Food! No, there was NO kodoku in any of it.
"But now I can 'dare'/torture someone!" Sakki exclaimed, and did a scary evil laugh that would haunt everyone in their nightmares. "The worst possible thing that could happen to them? Hehehe!"
Amiboshi and Suboshi began fighting over the last Eggo waffle.
"Aniki!" Suboshi whined. "Leggo my Eggo!"
"NEVER!"
(And so on, and so forth, and all was futile and meaningless and so on, as the twins continued to bicker over the waffle which was lost in the end because Soi stole it while singing "Koori-tachi no PURAIDO/Pride of Ice".) That line was not in the fic. It's 11:15 at night so I'm tired and I feel like adding it in!
"Ahhh!" 'Yui' exclaimed, thinking Sakki would be after her, and trying to hide under the table.
"I pick…" Sakki said evilly.
But who does Sakki pick? I don't know! We go back to school on Monday, so we'll write more! Lots more, I promise! But now the fic is all typed. I hope you like it so far? ^_^ Review it please??