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:::: Part Two ::::
Abby stepped into the ER, regretting already her decision to not get that drink after all. She hadn't had a drink for a month. When she'd woken up next to a man that she didn't even recognize she knew it was time to stop. She knew she wasn't in control as she'd fooled herself into believing. So she'd stopped. Just like that. Just like she'd done the last time. And she didn't want to start now.
Abby spotted Luka at admit looking over a chart in his hands. Her heart sank. He appeared so normal, as if nothing had just happened to upset anything in his life. She envied that ability, wishing she had it. Wishing she could just flip a switch and pretend nothing had happened. Pretend she wasn't pregnant. Pretend that she didn't have to make a decision of whether to let another life live or not.
Sighing she spotted Dr. Weaver as the woman stepped into the lounge. She made a quick decision and followed.
"Dr. Weaver," Abby spoke as she passed the door. "Um, I have to leave work right now. I have, um, it's a family emergency and um..."
"Go," Weaver spoke and Abby looked at her surprised.
"What?" she questioned, certain she'd be fired if she really left.
"We're not busy, your shift ends in three hours and, frankly, if your off the clock it's less money I have to pay you."
"Um, thanks." Abby quickly walked out the door, before Weaver could change her mind.
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Abby wandered home, still in the haze which had started when she looked at the two pink lines appearing, and realized what they signified. She stopped at the store to buy gum, took a walk in the park, avoiding going back to her apartment. Tonight, she decided, she wouldn't think about her pregnancy, Luka, or anything related. The problems would still be there the next morning, and she could deal with them then.
She pushed the front door open lazily with her foot, dumping her bag in the foyer. There was a pile of clothes she'd washed the day before waiting to be folded, and dishes still dirty in the sink. She ignored that too, and walked to the couch. It was too short, too narrow, but so much better than her double bed, where she'd be reminded of all the times he'd slept over the last couple weeks. She knew she couldn't handle seeing her bedroom as it was right now, with Luka's t-shirts on the floor, the indentation of his body where he'd lain the night before, the scent of him on the sheets, the pillows
She pulled a blanket over herself and curled up on the couch. The look of pain she'd seen in his eyes after she told him the baby wasn't his came back to her, and she was beginning to wonder if it would ever be possible to get it out of her head when she heard a loud noise.
Someone was knocking. She sat up quickly, stunned at the sound for a second. Before she could ask who it was, a voice said her name.
"Abby?" There was a long pause. "Abby, we need to talk. I know you're in there. Let me in."
Her heart began to beat faster when she realized it was him, but she tried not to assume anything. She walked to the door cautiously, blanket still around her shoulders, and opened the door.
Her first impression was that Luka looked like hell. His hair was messed, his tie was halfway undone, and his eyes were red. She lowered her eyes from his stare and stepped aside to let him in.
So much for his ability to pretend nothing had happened, Abby thought as Luka stepped around her and into her living room. She shut the door and then went to sit back down on the couch. Luka stayed standing but took position by the window to stare down at the street below.
Abby didn't say anything. He had come to talk to her and it was his turn to talk. He knew the situation. She'd told him everything she cold. She'd apologized and now it was his turn to talk. She couldn't say anymore till he said something.
"What are you planning to do Abby? About the baby, I mean." Luka turned to face her finally. "Who is the father?"
Abby's eyes immediately flashed downwards. How could she tell him? How was she supposed to tell him that she'd spent hours at a bar getting drunk and then took some guy, just as drunk, home with her and slept with him? How was she supposed to tell him this? At least she had gotten the guys name before he'd left that next morning, Abby thought bitterly but then realized that the thought was no more comforting.
"I don't know what I'm going to do yet," Abby spoke softly, hoping she could get away with not telling Luka about the baby's father.
But his eyes narrowed in on her and he asked the question again, "Who's the father Abby?"
Abby took a deep breath, fighting back the tears she could feel starting to come. She raised her head and looked at him. He deserved this much. He deserved the truth, and she should at least be brave enough to look him in the eye when she told him.
"You don't know him." She watched Luka's face cloud over and she continued. "Neither do I, really."
"What the hell do you mean, Abby?" He shifted his weight impatiently. "Give me a name. I want to know his name."
"Andrew." It pained her just to say the syllables of his name. "Andrew Harvey."
Andrew. Luka mulled the name over in his mind for a moment, trying to think of an appropriate response to Abby's confession. Before he knew what to say, Abby spoke again.
"I met him in a bar last month. He came home with me and things went a little too far."
"You were drunk," it was a statement, not a question, for Luka already knew the obvious truth.
Abby nodded her head, answering anyways. "Yes," she whispered watching Luka uncomfortably.
Luka closed his eyes briefly, sighed then walked over to the couch and sat down next to Abby.
"What are you going to do?" his question was a whisper. Abby looked over and met his eyes. No more anger, just concern, but still a lot of pain.
"I really don't know what to do," she whispered feeling a tear slip down her cheek. She quickly wiped it away.
"You should contact the father," said Luka.
"Why?" Abby asked feeling it was a stupid question.
"Because it's his baby," Luka stated a little too firmly.
"Luka I don't even know if I am going to have this baby," Abby spoke. "Why tell him if I'm not even going to have it?"
"You mean an abortion?" Luka questioned.
Abby nodded. "Yes. You're not against abortion, I know you're not, so don't act like you are."
"To a certain extent I'm not but Abby you went out and you got drunk and you had sex with a stranger and you created a baby with him. Maybe it's time you actually take responsibility. You made the mistake, now live with it. I'm not telling you to keep this baby but having an abortion is wrong."
Abby just stared at him. As his words sunk in she found that she wanted to burst into tears. She needed him on her side. She needed his support. And he just told her that she was irresponsible. Slowly the feeling of crying disappeared and was replaced with anger.
"Leave," Abby spoke firmly and quietly. Her voice rose with each of her next words until she was almost yelling. "Walk out that door, and leave, Luka. Get the hell out of my apartment."
He looked at her, surprised, his eyes asking her if he had understood her meaning correctly. Her eyes were so cold when she looked at him, that he almost wanted to back down. Almost. He knew he was right, and she needed to realize this was her responsibility. This time she'd have to deal with her own problems.
"Gladly." He rose from the couch quickly, knocking a pillow off in his haste towards the door. "Push everyone away who wants to help you, Abby. You're good at that. We all know you've had enough practice."
Abby's anger only grew more at his words and she stood up to follow him to the door.
"How the hell can you tell me to take responsibility?" she screamed. "How can you even stand there and say any of those things to me? You have no idea what it's like! You live in your head Luka! And in your head there's this image of the perfect life! The perfect family! Your perfect little wife and your perfect kids! You don't even know what the real world is like!"
"I don't know what the real world is like?" Luka shouted back. "Abby I lost that family! You have no idea what true pain is! You're living in a fairy tale! You get pregnant and all you ever want to do is kill it! All you do is run away from your responsibility! You're right, when I had my family my life was perfect! God only knows why I'd settle for you!" The words came before he could stop them. Before he even realized his mouth was forming them they were out. The look on Abby's face was heartbreaking.
"And it's no wonder your family died Luka," Abby spoke, venom dripping from every word. "You don't deserve a family."
"And neither do you!" Luka spat back. "I feel sorry for your baby, Abby, coming into the world with a mother like you."
They stood there, glaring at each other, neither sure what to say. All the insults had been said, every line had been crossed, and neither of them knew what to do next.
Abby angrily wiped away the tears which came faster now, mad at herself for being hurt by his comments. She aimed her head away from Luka's view, letting her hair cover her face as she stepped past him towards the door.
She flung it open and motioned into the hallway, daring him to leave.
Luka watched her, anger in his eyes, for only a moment before stepping past her, through the door and exiting her apartment. She watched as he walked down the hallway and disappeared inside the stairwell. Finally, minutes after he'd entered the stairwell, she closed the door.
Walking back over to the couch, Abby sank down onto it and began to cry. She cried for everything she'd just said to Luka and for everything he'd said to her. She cried for their lost relationship that she knew this time could never be fixed. And she cried for the memory of being in his arms only this morning safe and secure in the knowledge that she had a good future to look forward to. In only a matter of a few hours that future had been taken from her.
Something Abby had once been told suddenly came to her memory. You can do something in a heartbeat that will cause heartache for a lifetime.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -The End of Part 2 (Please Review)
DISCLAIMER: The above was a story of fan fiction based on characters created and owned by Michael Crichton, NBC, Warner Bros. and any other persons or companies affiliated with the television drama ER but not mentioned within this disclaimer.
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"All Things Bad and All Things Good" written 2002 by Abilene and Dasha.
Please, we ask that you do not distribute this story anywhere else.