:::: Part Four ::::
"It's a lot emptier in here than I remember it." Abby said as they stepped into the restaurant. She glanced around again and checked her watch, confused. "Luka, it's completely empty at 7.30, are you sure it's open?"
She looked around again, comparing the deserted room with her memory of how crowded it used to be when Luka lived upstairs. It had always been full of tourists comparing their itineraries, businessmen closing deals and romantic couples sharing tender words over candle-lit dinners. She was surprised how vividly she remembered how it had been to be one of those couples.
"It's ours for the night." Luka looked down at her almost guiltily, feeling a sudden need to explain his actions. "I'm friends with the owner, you know. I thought we could use some privacy tonight."
Abby looked up at him closely, certain there was more to this. More than just them needing privacy. He'd taken her to eat dinner at a hotel he used to live at. Who did something like that? Unless it was seen not as a hotel, but a place they used to spend a lot of time at together. A place they'd gone to in their first year of dating. A place they'd been happy.
The fact that he'd managed to make it so that they had the entire restaurant to themselves for the night was coming across as a little too romantic for Abby. They weren't even friends anymore. Were they? She'd said the cruelest things to him, and him to her. How could that so easily be forgotten?
"Come on," Luka spoke. "I think it's safe to say we can seat ourselves."
Abby followed Luka into the restaurant and towards a table they both knew well. It was the same table they had always sat at when they'd eaten here. It was just your average round table for two, set up beside a window overlooking a small manmade pond in the backyard of the hotel. Right now the pond was frozen over but with the moon's gleam focusing down on it, it still gave off the romantic setting that Abby was sure it was meant to.
"So is there a waiter, or do we serve ourselves?" Abby teased him as she sat down in the chair he pulled out for her.
"I've already taken care of everything." Luka smiled at her, and she realized the waiter was already approaching them with glasses of water, as if on cue.
He looked so happy tonight, Abby noticed, and again wondered why he had gone to so much trouble. She took a sip of the water which had been brought, hoping it might calm her a bit. Anticipating what Luka might say tonight was making her stomach turn somersaults.
"So, how've you been?" Luka asked as the waiter walked away from their table and disappeared into the kitchen.
Abby looked over at him uncertainly, not sure how to answer. The truth? Half the truth? Or a downright lie?
"I've been okay," she replied, not sure which category it fit into.
"Good," Luka spoke with a soft smile.
Moments of an uneasy silence passed between them. Abby averted her eyes by looking down at the table and running her fingers over a small imperfection in the wood. All the while she could feel Luka's eyes on her.
Finally, when she was about to ask how he'd been, Luka suddenly spoke, changing their topic from light conversation to very emotional and personal. "I've missed you Abby."
Abby looked at him for a moment, shocked. She heard the words he was saying, but it took a lot longer for the meaning to reach her brain.
"You've missed me?" She repeated his words incredulously, trying not to believe him. He couldn't be serious. "What did you miss more, the insults or the betrayal?"
Luka ignored her sarcasm. He looked her straight in the eye, waiting until she returned his gaze. "I never thought words could hurt me." He paused. "But what you said, it hurt me deeply - only because it came from you. It hurt me, Abby, but it didn't make me stop caring about you."
There was more silence as Abby considered his words. She had felt guilty ever since that day for saying what she'd said to him. She'd gone to bed every night with an emotional pain, sometimes so bad it caused a physical pain, not because of the hurt from his words but the guilt she felt about her words. And now he was telling her, he still cared about her.
She felt a tear begin to trail down her cheek and quickly lowered her head to prevent Luka from noticing it. However Luka reached out and lifted up her chin so that she was forced to look at him. He smiled at her, rubbing away the tear with his thumb.
"I know I hurt you too Abby," he began, "and I am very sorry for that. I didn't mean what I said. I know you'd make a great mother. This baby would be lucky to have you."
Abby lowed her eyes, feeling how wrong he was. This baby would be lucky if it had never been created. It would be lucky if it had anybody but her.
"Are you planning on keeping it?" he asked gently. The sincerity she heard in his voice told her that he wouldn't criticize whatever decision she had come to.
Slowly Abby shook her head, "No." Remembering their fight she knew immediately what he must be thinking. She hurried to correct it, "I'm thinking I'll put it up for adoption."
Luka nodded. "Have you talked to the father?"
Abby smiled weakly. "He told me to leave him alone. He doesn't want anything to do with it. Isn't that terrible? Neither of us want anything to do with it."
"It's not that terrible Abby." She looked at him questioningly, he continued. "You made a mistake one night and out of it some couple that can never have kids will get this wonderful little human being. How can that be terrible?"
Abby smiled over at Luka, but felt like crying. He'd just told her what she'd needed to be told so badly for so long. That her mistake may not be such a mistake. That her terrible actions may not be so terrible. And it had been him who'd told her. A man of who's opinion she so valued.
The arrival of the waiter with their meal interrupted Abby's musings. The small talk began right where it had left off earlier, with her asking how Luka was doing. Forgiveness having been given to her, she let herself enjoy being with him, talking with him. It had been such a long time since she felt so comfortable with anyone, including herself.
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One Hour Later...
Abby ran her hand through the leaves of the tree which stood by the icy pond, letting tiny icicles run between the fingers of her gloves. She felt Luka's arm weave its way around her shoulders, and, without thinking, she leaned into him. Instinctively, she knew he wouldn't push her away. And it was such a nice feeling to have his arms around her, his presence seemed to take away all her pain and worries.
"I should start heading home." She told him, her voice slightly muffled in his jacket. "I've got an early shift tomorrow."
Luka pulled away from her a bit to look at her, keeping his arm around her protectively. "Of course. It's been a long night, you must be exhausted."
Abby nodded, smiled and then began to pull away from him. Luka hesitated for a moment but then realized that hesitations weren't needed, not anymore. He smiled to himself and stopped Abby with a gentle grasp of her arm.
"What is it?" she asked as he turned her around to face him.
Luka thought for a moment, then reached into his pocket and felt for the small velvet box there. Kneeling down before her on one knee, realizing before his one knee even touched the ground that it would be cold and wet, he didn't even waver as he pulled out the small velvet box.
"Abby," he began softly, "we've had this crazy on again off again relationship since we started. But I know that we are destined to be together. We have to be because no matter what we've put each other through, through it all I've never stopped feeling this overwhelming, overpowering love for you. It's so strong that I feel it emotionally and physically. I never want this to end and I know it won't. We're always going to end up together. So, let's make it official. Will you marry me Abby?"
Luka had been watching her closely this whole time. He watched as she first recognized what he was doing. He watched the shock and then love cross over her features, mingled with a little bit of fright. But now he was noticing something all together different. She didn't seem completely with him anymore. Something was wrong.
"Abby?" Luka jumped to both his feat and immediately reached out to touch her arm as if the sheer contact would help. He watched as she grabbed hold of her stomach and closed her eyes tightly as tears quickly formed. "Abby?" he asked again, this time a little more desperate.
"Oh, god, Luka it hurts," she burley got the words out before she collapsed into his embrace.
He tried his best to keep her from slipping to the icy cold ground as she fell, picking her up in his arms.
"Abby?" He felt along her neck for a pulse. "Abby, talk to me! What's wrong? What hurts you? Abby?" Her only reply was a low moan.
He clutched her still form even more tightly and ran as fast as he could back to the hotel lobby, shouting for help.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -The End of Part 4 (Please Review)
DISCLAIMER: The above was a story of fan fiction based on characters created and owned by Michael Crichton, NBC, Warner Bros. and any other persons or companies affiliated with the television drama ER but not mentioned within this disclaimer.
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"All Things Bad and All Things Good" written 2002 by Abilene and Dasha.
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