Part 16
The sky was beginning to brighten as Max pulled the Cherokee to a stop. He glanced at Liz, who had fallen asleep in the passenger seat an hour or so before. He knew that she had resisted it for as long as possible, clearly still not entirely comfortable letting go that much in his company, but her fatigue had finally taken over. It had been a long, emotional day for both of them. She had needed an escape and sleep had provided it - at least for the time being.
He smiled slightly to himself, took a moment just to enjoy looking at her. She was still so incredibly beautiful to him, it almost took his breath away. Her dark hair brushed the side of her neck, framing the soft skin of her face, slightly flushed in sleep, making his fingers ache to reach out and touch her. To him, she did not look a day older. Her being still called to him, sang to his soul in a way he could not ever get tired of.
Her perfection in his eyes was almost maddening because it was inescapable and now, again, unattainable.
It still felt weird to actually have her right in front of him. He had dreamt of it for so long, it almost felt unreal, as though he was soon going to wake up, going to have to return to the loneliness, the solitude of the past few years.
Just being with her filled the empty places in his heart, places he had known would not be complete again until he was with her. That there seemed to be no hope for their relationship in the future did not change this fact. It was the same as it had always been, even in the days before she had known the truth about him, before he had healed her, when he had sat in a booth at the Crashdown, content just to be in the same room as his dreamgirl. His soul ached to be with hers, if even only so simply.
He had never understood the obsession he had always harboured for Liz Parker, had always simply embraced it, had accepted it as a part of his make-up that made little sense and had less hope, perhaps merely an aching need to feel human, if only in that small way. When he [I]had[/I] actually had the chance to be with her, it had turned out to be even more intense, more fulfilling, more [I]right[/I] than he had ever even imagined in his wildest dreams.
And he had been the one to throw it all away. It was irretrievably lost, but it did not mean that he could not remember what it had been like, did not secretly hope that it could be regained. He knew it was unfair to her, knew that he had been wrong to tease her about Dan when her fiancé had called, but he had been unable to stop himself.
Because, even if they were never together again, he knew that they were supposed to be, and it made him unable to control himself sometimes. It was almost more than he could bear to know that Kadiya had made the ultimate sacrifice so that they [I]could[/I] be together eventually, and now, it had gone all wrong again.
He was doing his best to keep his promise, the promise he had made to her that he would not interfere in her life, but it was a battle he was losing. All he wanted to do was kiss her and demand that she admit that they belonged together, that Dan had simply been a distraction, a place-holder for he, Max. He was actually longing for Michael to arrive with the others, so that a buffer zone could be established, so that he did not have to hold himself quite so rigidly, quite so distantly any more.
It was a relief to get out of the car. Max took several deep breaths, stretched his arms over his head and then rubbed his neck. He was exhausted, not only from the long car ride, but from the tumult of emotion that had been his constant companion since he had first heard that Liz was getting married to someone else.
The confined space had become almost too much, especially during some of the more intense moments of their conversation over the course of the night. It had taken all of his willpower to move her hand away from him when she had touched him at one point. He had wanted to bring her palm to his lips, had wanted to make [I]love[/I] to that small hand, until she understood how much merely being in her presence meant to him, affected him.
He had known it had simply been her way of comforting him though, had not wanted to make her uncomfortable. Instead, he had spent the rest of the long ride to Marathon in a state of heightened arousal, beyond what he had become used to in her company. The spot where she had touched him still burned now, as though in a promise unfulfilled.
Max shook his head sharply, forced himself to focus on the problem at hand. Pining over Liz was a waste of time and it was also selfish, considering his son's life was presently still in acute danger.
He was standing in front of William Atherton's dome-shaped house, a place he had never expected to see again. Max wasn't sure why he had thought of it when a place to hide had become necessary, but there was no question that it was secluded, as well as deserted, standing as it did in the middle of the desert, not another house around for miles.
And the memories associated with it had been poignant and tempting. He admitted to himself that he had liked the idea of driving 285 South with Liz again, had secretly harboured a hope that the return to a place where they had shared one of their first adventures might inspire her to re-embrace the magical feeling of being together at any cost, through any problem. It was immature and stupid, but it was true.
Now, looking at the dump that stood in front of him, Max grimaced to himself and shook his head in annoyance. Making this place livable, if even for 24 hours was going to take a lot of energy - energy he didn't particularly have at the moment. He glanced back longingly at the Jeep, wondered if he could justify driving to a nearby motel, if even for a few hours of shut eye before the others arrived and they decided on a plan of action. He could see Ben still sprawled on the back-seat, sound asleep. Liz had not stirred either, even when the car had stopped.
Max sighed again, moved towards the door. He didn't have the luxury of taking chances. He needed to be where he had told Michael he would be. It was what a leader did and he knew that better than anyone. Changing the plan half-way through was the way to get people killed. They had agreed that they would refrain from cell-phone calls for as long as possible after all, Max more than aware of the Skins technological capabilities after fighting them for so long on Antar. Patching themselves into communication frequencies was one of the easiest ways to get information.
As far as Nicholas knew right now, they were lost, which is what they needed to stay.
He pushed open the door after snapping the lock back with his powers.
The main dome area was still as bare as it had been over ten years ago. He made his way through to the living quarters at the back, found the bedroom easily. They had not been in it during their raid the first time and it looked like no one else had been since then either. The dust hung heavily in the air, made Max want to sneeze. It would not do.
He ran his hand lightly over the surface of the double bed, using his powers to clean the sheets and the mattress beneath. Liz and Ben could share it. He would bring in the sleeping bag he kept in the back of the Jeep to use for himself.
He had barely finished when the creak of the main door and movement in the outer room made him whip his head around.
"Dad?"
It was Ben, sounding half-asleep. "I'm in here kiddo," Max called out, standing up and going out to meet his son.
Ben stood in the middle of the dome, looking up, an awe-struck expression on his face. "What is this place? It looks just like Antar Dad!"
"Yeah. The guy who used to live here had a mild obsession with our culture." Max told him wryly.
"It's kind of weird." Ben assessed, turning around and staring at all the corners. He grimaced. "I don't like it."
"We won't be here for long." Max replied. "I promise." He moved forward, reached out to ruffle Ben's blond hair. "How're you feeling? You used up a lot of energy last night."
"Tired." Ben admitted. "But I did it Dad! I saved Michael and Maria! I was really scared, but I still did it!"
Max felt his heart enter his throat. "I know you were Buddy. I'm really proud of you." He pulled Ben against him, hugging him tightly.
"Is he going to come back? That guy?" Ben asked, his voice trembling slightly.
"He won't get anywhere near you again. I promise." Max said, meaning it.
"Good." Ben replied. "He was really creepy and scary. I could feel him coming from a really long way off. He just felt...bad." He frowned slightly, shaking his curly, blond head thoughtfully. And with that, he let it go. He wandered off to investigate their surroundings.
Max closed his eyes briefly, knew that his son was willing to forget about the incident because he trusted Max to keep him safe. He had no idea how much danger he was still in, that they still had no idea what the hell Nicholas wanted with the child. Max had already let him down once, by letting Nicholas near him. It was not going to happen again.
"Benno, I'm going to get your stuff out of the car and then you're going to go back to bed for a while." Max called out to him. Ben had disappeared into the back living quarters, still looking around.
"Awww, Dad. It's morning!" He poked his head out from the doorway that led to Atherton's office. "Hey! I have to go to school! I promised Ray and Hunter that I would bring the hockey cards Michael gave me to show them."
Max grimaced. "No school for a few days." He sighed. "For you or Mrs. Ramirez."
Ben stared at him. "What do you mean?"
"Michael played a little trick on us." Max told him wryly. "It turns out that your teacher is your Aunt Isabel Ben."
"Weird." Ben shrugged. "And you know Liz too." He looked towards the door leading outside. "I really like Liz Dad. I'm glad she's the one you told me about. Is that why she's here?" He asked. "Because you were right? She loves me already?"
Max smiled sadly. "That's why she's here kiddo." Max felt a stab of guilt when the thought passed through his mind that he wished it wasn't the only reason. Jealousy of his own child was not a good thing. Not a good thing at all.
He needed help. Serious help.
"Cool." Ben moved towards the door. "Do you want me to wake her up?"
"I guess you'd better." He immediately thrust several ideas of how [I]he[/I] would like to wake up Liz from his thoughts, sighing as he turned and went back to the bedroom to continue his cleaning.
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[I] "You came back." She stared at him, her heart in her throat. She had thought that she would never see him again, that their last night together had been something she was going to have to hold on to for the rest of her lonely existence. And, yet, here he stood, staring at her, his eyes shining with despair.
So it was done then. The look on his face told her everything she needed to know.
"I had to see you." He said, his voice husky with emotion.
"You didn't even say good-bye." She told him quietly, inanely. How it could be important now, she didn't know, but it was.
"I couldn't. I would never have found the strength to go if I had." He swallowed. She could see that he was trying not to reach out for her, knew that he was aching to haul her against him, just as she was trying desperately to control the urge to throw herself into his arms.
But he was not hers. Not any longer.
"It's too late." She whispered.
"I know." His face was telling her that, in his mind, it was not though. All she had to do was bend, if even a little, and they could still be together.
"It has to be my love. There was no other way." She repeated the words she had told him many times before, since the very first day. And, yet, she had given in every time.
This time she could not. She had to be strong.
"There is." He replied, shaking his head. "I know it. I am the king."
She smiled sadly, "But you would not be the king any longer. You would have to give up your throne and I cannot allow you to do it."
"It means nothing without you." He replied, turning away. "My life means nothing."
She moved up behind him, knowing it was a mistake, but unable to see him in such pain. She reached out a tentative hand, touched him on the shoulder. "Antar and your family must come first. I cannot ask you to throw them all away for me. It is not right."
He turned on her then, his expression one of tortured rage. But she knew that it was not truly directed at her but, rather, at the destiny he could not control, no matter how much he tried to. "It is not right that I should be trapped in a life I don't want! This planet is decaying from the inside out and the monarchy is at the root of it. It is wrong that the fate of an entire system rests in the power of one man. I don't want to be that man, and yet, I am, because of a twist of fate I did not ask for. All I want is you!" With that, he groaned in agony, pulled her against him, burying his face against her neck.
She knew that she should pull away, knew that it was wrong, that he was newly married, that he belonged to her mistress now, but she could not turn him away. Not when he was in such pain.
"Please Kadi. Please!" She felt his lips on her hair, on her cheek, on her eyelids. She felt her heart thundering in her chest as they finally came to rest where they belonged - on her own. "Please." He whispered between kisses. "I will leave her. I will announce it to the galaxy tonight. I will give it all up. All you must do is allow it." Her knees were giving out on her, his gentle assault on her senses too much. She felt him sweep her up in his arms as she stumbled. But she was too lost in him to stop him. She opened her mouth to him, pulled him closer.
He was hers. Zan. She could not turn him away. "Yes. Very well." She sobbed. "I cannot be strong any longer." And with that she allowed herself to let go.
"You are the strongest person I know." He whispered against her hair, much later, as she lay spent in his arms. "It is your strength that allows me to do what, I know in my heart, is right. We are meant to be together and I am meant to lead my planet to a new era of freedom. And it will start tonight."
"Yes. Yes! I know it will be." She murmured, drifting off, her head cradled against his chest, her hand locked in his. Her last conscious thought was of his kiss on her palm. [/I]
Until she felt someone shaking her. "Wake up! It's time to wake up...Liz!"
And then, "DAD! I can't get Liz to wake up! I think you're going to have to carry her!"
Liz recognized the voice, felt as though she was swimming up through thick soup, as her eyes fluttered open. It seemed to take an inordinate amount of time to get her bearings as the world came into focus.
She blinked at Max, who was presently staring down at her, an amused expression on his face. "Did you have a nice nap?" He asked teasingly. She could see Ben trying to see around his father's body, jumping around with far too much energy for the early hour. It was making her tired just looking at him.
Max pushed Ben gently away as he moved back to allow her to climb out of the car.
"Is she awake? I thought she might be dead." The boy was staring at her. Liz felt herself blushing. How long had they been trying to wake her up anyway? "Do you always sleep like that?" He asked, sounding suspicious. "You were talking in your sleep. Dad says we're going to have to share the bed, but I don't know if this is going to work."
Liz glanced at Max, who simply raised an eyebrow at her. She blushed for some reason she did not understand. "No." She replied nervously, running her hands through her hair. "I think I was having a weird dream." She told Ben, who suddenly looked interested.
"Really? What was it about?" He asked, taking her hand and pulling her towards the house.
Liz threw her head back, stared up at the dome, memories of the last time she had been there instantly filling her mind, making her shiver to herself. It was funny how truly frightening experiences could take on an almost unreal feeling over the years. But she still remembered her terror for Max and Isabel and Michael when they had realized that someone had followed them to Marathon.
She had never feared for herself here. Because what would anyone want with a small-town girl from Roswell? For her, it had always been about protecting Max and the others. And now it was about protecting Ben.
"I'm not sure." She told the boy now. "But it was very strange. I think your dad was in it." She added, without thinking.
Now where the heck had that come from? Liz frowned, annoyed at herself. But she knew it was true. Max [I]had[/I] been in the dream. In what context, she didn't have any idea, but the way her face was warming up at the moment, she was beginning to guess.
She glanced back at Max, who was following closely, obviously eavesdropping. His startled look was already transforming itself into a self-satisfied smile that made her want to punch him.
"It must have been a nightmare." She told Ben quickly. He laughed, clearly thinking she was teasing him.
But Max continued to smirk, moving past her on his way into the house, his hand [I]accidentally[/I] brushing against her arm, sending a shiver down her spine. He grinned at her again as he picked Ben up and threw him over his shoulder, turning his back on her completely.
She stared after him as he carried the child through a doorway across the room. She was more confused than ever. Was he not the one who had [I]not[/I] wanted her touching him, only a few short hours ago?
And then she understood. It came to her so suddenly, it took a moment for her to move past her astonishment and into full on rage.
But it did not take long.
It was all part of some devious plot he had cooked up. He was [I]trying[/I] to drive her crazy by pretending that he wasn't interested in her, in hopes that it would make her fall right into his arms. And it was working! Had she or had she not just had an incredibly, embarrassingly detailed dream about him making love to her? Because it was all coming back to her now in excruciating detail. She could still feel his hands on her body, touching her in ways he had [I]never[/I] touched her, not even in their most intimate moments as teenagers.
Liz pursed her lips, crossed her arms and forced the thoughts out of her mind. A dream was simply a dream, nothing more. She was not going to let him get to her. She had to be stronger willed than this. She loved [I]Dan[/I].
And there was no way on God's green Earth she was sharing a bedroom with him. He had to be crazy if he thought so. He could just bloody well sleep in the car.
Liz stomped over to the door where Max and Ben had disappeared, ready to toss Max out on his ear if need be.
When she entered, she was surprised to find a fairly clean and comfortable looking bedroom, where Max was already pulling the blankets up around his son.
"I still don't get why I have to go back to sleep." Ben was muttering. "It's light out and I'm not tired at all." Liz felt her anger draining out of her almost immediately. She couldn't help but smile because this last bit was said through an almost side-splitting yawn.
"Just for a little while." Max replied, glancing up at Liz briefly and then back at his son. "You can get up when Michael and Auntie Izzy get here. You're going to have to help look after Lexi after all. You need your sleep."
"Who's Lexi?" Ben asked through another yawn. "I don't like girls."
"She's not just a girl." Max told him, sounding amused again. "She's your cousin and she's really only a baby."
"Well, that's okay I guess." Ben grumbled, closing his eyes. But when Max moved to stand up, Ben's hand snapped out and grabbed his arm. "Dad, don't go."
"I'm going to be right here kiddo." Max replied softly, disentangling himself. "Just over there on the floor."
Ben's eyes were open again. "Why can't we all sleep together?" He demanded. "It's a really big bed Dad." Liz could tell that he was trying to keep his voice steady. She could hear the tremor though. She felt her heart go out to him. He had had a major scare the night before, probably still had no idea why either. He needed to feel as secure as possible right now. He was looking at her now, his eyes bright. "It's okay, right Liz?"
She glanced at Max, who looked upset. She could tell that he was trying not to look at her, trying not to pressure her to agree to this. Her heart was beating wildly, for no reason that made any sense. "You take the bed Max." She said. "I'll sleep on the floor."
Ben frowned. "That's dumb." He argued, with the logic of which only children were capable. "This is the biggest bed I've [I]ever[/I] seen!" He exclaimed. "I bet we could fit fifty people in it."
"Well, maybe not that many." Liz laughed. She just shook her head. She could deal with this. They were just going to sleep after all, Ben was going to be between them, and Max was embarrassed enough now to not even want to look at her. He was staring at the wall, an unreadable expression on his face. "It's okay." She decided. "It's only a nap anyway." Max's head whipped around. He stared at her, apparently shocked that she had agreed to it.
So maybe he [I]didn't[/I] have a plan after all.
"Right." Ben declared. "We need our sleep Dad. You said so yourself."
Max sighed heavily. "Fine." But Ben was already closing his eyes and drifting off. "Liz, you don't have to do this." Max whispered after staring down at this son for a moment. "He won't even notice the difference. He's already asleep."
Liz shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant. "I think he will Max. And he needs to feel safe right now."
Max ran a hand through his hair. "Well, okay. If you're sure." He turned his back, sat down on the bed again and started to unlace his shoes. Liz watched him for a full minute before she jumped, realized what she was doing and gently sat down on the other side to do the same.
She settled back carefully against the pillow, closing her eyes. She felt the bed shift slightly as Max did the same on the other side. A feeling of peace so unexpectedly settled over her, her eyes snapped open again.
For one split second, the entire world had shifted, had felt supremely [I]right[/I] in a way that she could not explain. In a way she had never thought to experience again. In a way she realized she had [I]not[/I] experienced in a very long time.
She jumped slightly when the silence that had descended over the room was broken by Max, who whispered, "Liz?"
"Yeah?"
"Thank you." It was simply stated but it made her heart beat a mile a minute.
She swallowed. "You're welcome." She whispered back, turning onto other side so that she met his eyes over Ben, who was already sound asleep and snoring slightly.
His dark eyes were bright with a longing so intense, she felt her heart turn over in her chest. "Have a good sleep." She said lightly, trying to break the moment.
He broke eye contact with her, turned over onto his back, throwing his arm over his face. "Sweet dreams." He replied quietly. She felt her heart beating a mile a minute again, just looking at him.
Liz turned over again, knowing, without a shadow of a doubt, that she was going to dream of him.
To be continued...
The sky was beginning to brighten as Max pulled the Cherokee to a stop. He glanced at Liz, who had fallen asleep in the passenger seat an hour or so before. He knew that she had resisted it for as long as possible, clearly still not entirely comfortable letting go that much in his company, but her fatigue had finally taken over. It had been a long, emotional day for both of them. She had needed an escape and sleep had provided it - at least for the time being.
He smiled slightly to himself, took a moment just to enjoy looking at her. She was still so incredibly beautiful to him, it almost took his breath away. Her dark hair brushed the side of her neck, framing the soft skin of her face, slightly flushed in sleep, making his fingers ache to reach out and touch her. To him, she did not look a day older. Her being still called to him, sang to his soul in a way he could not ever get tired of.
Her perfection in his eyes was almost maddening because it was inescapable and now, again, unattainable.
It still felt weird to actually have her right in front of him. He had dreamt of it for so long, it almost felt unreal, as though he was soon going to wake up, going to have to return to the loneliness, the solitude of the past few years.
Just being with her filled the empty places in his heart, places he had known would not be complete again until he was with her. That there seemed to be no hope for their relationship in the future did not change this fact. It was the same as it had always been, even in the days before she had known the truth about him, before he had healed her, when he had sat in a booth at the Crashdown, content just to be in the same room as his dreamgirl. His soul ached to be with hers, if even only so simply.
He had never understood the obsession he had always harboured for Liz Parker, had always simply embraced it, had accepted it as a part of his make-up that made little sense and had less hope, perhaps merely an aching need to feel human, if only in that small way. When he [I]had[/I] actually had the chance to be with her, it had turned out to be even more intense, more fulfilling, more [I]right[/I] than he had ever even imagined in his wildest dreams.
And he had been the one to throw it all away. It was irretrievably lost, but it did not mean that he could not remember what it had been like, did not secretly hope that it could be regained. He knew it was unfair to her, knew that he had been wrong to tease her about Dan when her fiancé had called, but he had been unable to stop himself.
Because, even if they were never together again, he knew that they were supposed to be, and it made him unable to control himself sometimes. It was almost more than he could bear to know that Kadiya had made the ultimate sacrifice so that they [I]could[/I] be together eventually, and now, it had gone all wrong again.
He was doing his best to keep his promise, the promise he had made to her that he would not interfere in her life, but it was a battle he was losing. All he wanted to do was kiss her and demand that she admit that they belonged together, that Dan had simply been a distraction, a place-holder for he, Max. He was actually longing for Michael to arrive with the others, so that a buffer zone could be established, so that he did not have to hold himself quite so rigidly, quite so distantly any more.
It was a relief to get out of the car. Max took several deep breaths, stretched his arms over his head and then rubbed his neck. He was exhausted, not only from the long car ride, but from the tumult of emotion that had been his constant companion since he had first heard that Liz was getting married to someone else.
The confined space had become almost too much, especially during some of the more intense moments of their conversation over the course of the night. It had taken all of his willpower to move her hand away from him when she had touched him at one point. He had wanted to bring her palm to his lips, had wanted to make [I]love[/I] to that small hand, until she understood how much merely being in her presence meant to him, affected him.
He had known it had simply been her way of comforting him though, had not wanted to make her uncomfortable. Instead, he had spent the rest of the long ride to Marathon in a state of heightened arousal, beyond what he had become used to in her company. The spot where she had touched him still burned now, as though in a promise unfulfilled.
Max shook his head sharply, forced himself to focus on the problem at hand. Pining over Liz was a waste of time and it was also selfish, considering his son's life was presently still in acute danger.
He was standing in front of William Atherton's dome-shaped house, a place he had never expected to see again. Max wasn't sure why he had thought of it when a place to hide had become necessary, but there was no question that it was secluded, as well as deserted, standing as it did in the middle of the desert, not another house around for miles.
And the memories associated with it had been poignant and tempting. He admitted to himself that he had liked the idea of driving 285 South with Liz again, had secretly harboured a hope that the return to a place where they had shared one of their first adventures might inspire her to re-embrace the magical feeling of being together at any cost, through any problem. It was immature and stupid, but it was true.
Now, looking at the dump that stood in front of him, Max grimaced to himself and shook his head in annoyance. Making this place livable, if even for 24 hours was going to take a lot of energy - energy he didn't particularly have at the moment. He glanced back longingly at the Jeep, wondered if he could justify driving to a nearby motel, if even for a few hours of shut eye before the others arrived and they decided on a plan of action. He could see Ben still sprawled on the back-seat, sound asleep. Liz had not stirred either, even when the car had stopped.
Max sighed again, moved towards the door. He didn't have the luxury of taking chances. He needed to be where he had told Michael he would be. It was what a leader did and he knew that better than anyone. Changing the plan half-way through was the way to get people killed. They had agreed that they would refrain from cell-phone calls for as long as possible after all, Max more than aware of the Skins technological capabilities after fighting them for so long on Antar. Patching themselves into communication frequencies was one of the easiest ways to get information.
As far as Nicholas knew right now, they were lost, which is what they needed to stay.
He pushed open the door after snapping the lock back with his powers.
The main dome area was still as bare as it had been over ten years ago. He made his way through to the living quarters at the back, found the bedroom easily. They had not been in it during their raid the first time and it looked like no one else had been since then either. The dust hung heavily in the air, made Max want to sneeze. It would not do.
He ran his hand lightly over the surface of the double bed, using his powers to clean the sheets and the mattress beneath. Liz and Ben could share it. He would bring in the sleeping bag he kept in the back of the Jeep to use for himself.
He had barely finished when the creak of the main door and movement in the outer room made him whip his head around.
"Dad?"
It was Ben, sounding half-asleep. "I'm in here kiddo," Max called out, standing up and going out to meet his son.
Ben stood in the middle of the dome, looking up, an awe-struck expression on his face. "What is this place? It looks just like Antar Dad!"
"Yeah. The guy who used to live here had a mild obsession with our culture." Max told him wryly.
"It's kind of weird." Ben assessed, turning around and staring at all the corners. He grimaced. "I don't like it."
"We won't be here for long." Max replied. "I promise." He moved forward, reached out to ruffle Ben's blond hair. "How're you feeling? You used up a lot of energy last night."
"Tired." Ben admitted. "But I did it Dad! I saved Michael and Maria! I was really scared, but I still did it!"
Max felt his heart enter his throat. "I know you were Buddy. I'm really proud of you." He pulled Ben against him, hugging him tightly.
"Is he going to come back? That guy?" Ben asked, his voice trembling slightly.
"He won't get anywhere near you again. I promise." Max said, meaning it.
"Good." Ben replied. "He was really creepy and scary. I could feel him coming from a really long way off. He just felt...bad." He frowned slightly, shaking his curly, blond head thoughtfully. And with that, he let it go. He wandered off to investigate their surroundings.
Max closed his eyes briefly, knew that his son was willing to forget about the incident because he trusted Max to keep him safe. He had no idea how much danger he was still in, that they still had no idea what the hell Nicholas wanted with the child. Max had already let him down once, by letting Nicholas near him. It was not going to happen again.
"Benno, I'm going to get your stuff out of the car and then you're going to go back to bed for a while." Max called out to him. Ben had disappeared into the back living quarters, still looking around.
"Awww, Dad. It's morning!" He poked his head out from the doorway that led to Atherton's office. "Hey! I have to go to school! I promised Ray and Hunter that I would bring the hockey cards Michael gave me to show them."
Max grimaced. "No school for a few days." He sighed. "For you or Mrs. Ramirez."
Ben stared at him. "What do you mean?"
"Michael played a little trick on us." Max told him wryly. "It turns out that your teacher is your Aunt Isabel Ben."
"Weird." Ben shrugged. "And you know Liz too." He looked towards the door leading outside. "I really like Liz Dad. I'm glad she's the one you told me about. Is that why she's here?" He asked. "Because you were right? She loves me already?"
Max smiled sadly. "That's why she's here kiddo." Max felt a stab of guilt when the thought passed through his mind that he wished it wasn't the only reason. Jealousy of his own child was not a good thing. Not a good thing at all.
He needed help. Serious help.
"Cool." Ben moved towards the door. "Do you want me to wake her up?"
"I guess you'd better." He immediately thrust several ideas of how [I]he[/I] would like to wake up Liz from his thoughts, sighing as he turned and went back to the bedroom to continue his cleaning.
****************************************************************
[I] "You came back." She stared at him, her heart in her throat. She had thought that she would never see him again, that their last night together had been something she was going to have to hold on to for the rest of her lonely existence. And, yet, here he stood, staring at her, his eyes shining with despair.
So it was done then. The look on his face told her everything she needed to know.
"I had to see you." He said, his voice husky with emotion.
"You didn't even say good-bye." She told him quietly, inanely. How it could be important now, she didn't know, but it was.
"I couldn't. I would never have found the strength to go if I had." He swallowed. She could see that he was trying not to reach out for her, knew that he was aching to haul her against him, just as she was trying desperately to control the urge to throw herself into his arms.
But he was not hers. Not any longer.
"It's too late." She whispered.
"I know." His face was telling her that, in his mind, it was not though. All she had to do was bend, if even a little, and they could still be together.
"It has to be my love. There was no other way." She repeated the words she had told him many times before, since the very first day. And, yet, she had given in every time.
This time she could not. She had to be strong.
"There is." He replied, shaking his head. "I know it. I am the king."
She smiled sadly, "But you would not be the king any longer. You would have to give up your throne and I cannot allow you to do it."
"It means nothing without you." He replied, turning away. "My life means nothing."
She moved up behind him, knowing it was a mistake, but unable to see him in such pain. She reached out a tentative hand, touched him on the shoulder. "Antar and your family must come first. I cannot ask you to throw them all away for me. It is not right."
He turned on her then, his expression one of tortured rage. But she knew that it was not truly directed at her but, rather, at the destiny he could not control, no matter how much he tried to. "It is not right that I should be trapped in a life I don't want! This planet is decaying from the inside out and the monarchy is at the root of it. It is wrong that the fate of an entire system rests in the power of one man. I don't want to be that man, and yet, I am, because of a twist of fate I did not ask for. All I want is you!" With that, he groaned in agony, pulled her against him, burying his face against her neck.
She knew that she should pull away, knew that it was wrong, that he was newly married, that he belonged to her mistress now, but she could not turn him away. Not when he was in such pain.
"Please Kadi. Please!" She felt his lips on her hair, on her cheek, on her eyelids. She felt her heart thundering in her chest as they finally came to rest where they belonged - on her own. "Please." He whispered between kisses. "I will leave her. I will announce it to the galaxy tonight. I will give it all up. All you must do is allow it." Her knees were giving out on her, his gentle assault on her senses too much. She felt him sweep her up in his arms as she stumbled. But she was too lost in him to stop him. She opened her mouth to him, pulled him closer.
He was hers. Zan. She could not turn him away. "Yes. Very well." She sobbed. "I cannot be strong any longer." And with that she allowed herself to let go.
"You are the strongest person I know." He whispered against her hair, much later, as she lay spent in his arms. "It is your strength that allows me to do what, I know in my heart, is right. We are meant to be together and I am meant to lead my planet to a new era of freedom. And it will start tonight."
"Yes. Yes! I know it will be." She murmured, drifting off, her head cradled against his chest, her hand locked in his. Her last conscious thought was of his kiss on her palm. [/I]
Until she felt someone shaking her. "Wake up! It's time to wake up...Liz!"
And then, "DAD! I can't get Liz to wake up! I think you're going to have to carry her!"
Liz recognized the voice, felt as though she was swimming up through thick soup, as her eyes fluttered open. It seemed to take an inordinate amount of time to get her bearings as the world came into focus.
She blinked at Max, who was presently staring down at her, an amused expression on his face. "Did you have a nice nap?" He asked teasingly. She could see Ben trying to see around his father's body, jumping around with far too much energy for the early hour. It was making her tired just looking at him.
Max pushed Ben gently away as he moved back to allow her to climb out of the car.
"Is she awake? I thought she might be dead." The boy was staring at her. Liz felt herself blushing. How long had they been trying to wake her up anyway? "Do you always sleep like that?" He asked, sounding suspicious. "You were talking in your sleep. Dad says we're going to have to share the bed, but I don't know if this is going to work."
Liz glanced at Max, who simply raised an eyebrow at her. She blushed for some reason she did not understand. "No." She replied nervously, running her hands through her hair. "I think I was having a weird dream." She told Ben, who suddenly looked interested.
"Really? What was it about?" He asked, taking her hand and pulling her towards the house.
Liz threw her head back, stared up at the dome, memories of the last time she had been there instantly filling her mind, making her shiver to herself. It was funny how truly frightening experiences could take on an almost unreal feeling over the years. But she still remembered her terror for Max and Isabel and Michael when they had realized that someone had followed them to Marathon.
She had never feared for herself here. Because what would anyone want with a small-town girl from Roswell? For her, it had always been about protecting Max and the others. And now it was about protecting Ben.
"I'm not sure." She told the boy now. "But it was very strange. I think your dad was in it." She added, without thinking.
Now where the heck had that come from? Liz frowned, annoyed at herself. But she knew it was true. Max [I]had[/I] been in the dream. In what context, she didn't have any idea, but the way her face was warming up at the moment, she was beginning to guess.
She glanced back at Max, who was following closely, obviously eavesdropping. His startled look was already transforming itself into a self-satisfied smile that made her want to punch him.
"It must have been a nightmare." She told Ben quickly. He laughed, clearly thinking she was teasing him.
But Max continued to smirk, moving past her on his way into the house, his hand [I]accidentally[/I] brushing against her arm, sending a shiver down her spine. He grinned at her again as he picked Ben up and threw him over his shoulder, turning his back on her completely.
She stared after him as he carried the child through a doorway across the room. She was more confused than ever. Was he not the one who had [I]not[/I] wanted her touching him, only a few short hours ago?
And then she understood. It came to her so suddenly, it took a moment for her to move past her astonishment and into full on rage.
But it did not take long.
It was all part of some devious plot he had cooked up. He was [I]trying[/I] to drive her crazy by pretending that he wasn't interested in her, in hopes that it would make her fall right into his arms. And it was working! Had she or had she not just had an incredibly, embarrassingly detailed dream about him making love to her? Because it was all coming back to her now in excruciating detail. She could still feel his hands on her body, touching her in ways he had [I]never[/I] touched her, not even in their most intimate moments as teenagers.
Liz pursed her lips, crossed her arms and forced the thoughts out of her mind. A dream was simply a dream, nothing more. She was not going to let him get to her. She had to be stronger willed than this. She loved [I]Dan[/I].
And there was no way on God's green Earth she was sharing a bedroom with him. He had to be crazy if he thought so. He could just bloody well sleep in the car.
Liz stomped over to the door where Max and Ben had disappeared, ready to toss Max out on his ear if need be.
When she entered, she was surprised to find a fairly clean and comfortable looking bedroom, where Max was already pulling the blankets up around his son.
"I still don't get why I have to go back to sleep." Ben was muttering. "It's light out and I'm not tired at all." Liz felt her anger draining out of her almost immediately. She couldn't help but smile because this last bit was said through an almost side-splitting yawn.
"Just for a little while." Max replied, glancing up at Liz briefly and then back at his son. "You can get up when Michael and Auntie Izzy get here. You're going to have to help look after Lexi after all. You need your sleep."
"Who's Lexi?" Ben asked through another yawn. "I don't like girls."
"She's not just a girl." Max told him, sounding amused again. "She's your cousin and she's really only a baby."
"Well, that's okay I guess." Ben grumbled, closing his eyes. But when Max moved to stand up, Ben's hand snapped out and grabbed his arm. "Dad, don't go."
"I'm going to be right here kiddo." Max replied softly, disentangling himself. "Just over there on the floor."
Ben's eyes were open again. "Why can't we all sleep together?" He demanded. "It's a really big bed Dad." Liz could tell that he was trying to keep his voice steady. She could hear the tremor though. She felt her heart go out to him. He had had a major scare the night before, probably still had no idea why either. He needed to feel as secure as possible right now. He was looking at her now, his eyes bright. "It's okay, right Liz?"
She glanced at Max, who looked upset. She could tell that he was trying not to look at her, trying not to pressure her to agree to this. Her heart was beating wildly, for no reason that made any sense. "You take the bed Max." She said. "I'll sleep on the floor."
Ben frowned. "That's dumb." He argued, with the logic of which only children were capable. "This is the biggest bed I've [I]ever[/I] seen!" He exclaimed. "I bet we could fit fifty people in it."
"Well, maybe not that many." Liz laughed. She just shook her head. She could deal with this. They were just going to sleep after all, Ben was going to be between them, and Max was embarrassed enough now to not even want to look at her. He was staring at the wall, an unreadable expression on his face. "It's okay." She decided. "It's only a nap anyway." Max's head whipped around. He stared at her, apparently shocked that she had agreed to it.
So maybe he [I]didn't[/I] have a plan after all.
"Right." Ben declared. "We need our sleep Dad. You said so yourself."
Max sighed heavily. "Fine." But Ben was already closing his eyes and drifting off. "Liz, you don't have to do this." Max whispered after staring down at this son for a moment. "He won't even notice the difference. He's already asleep."
Liz shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant. "I think he will Max. And he needs to feel safe right now."
Max ran a hand through his hair. "Well, okay. If you're sure." He turned his back, sat down on the bed again and started to unlace his shoes. Liz watched him for a full minute before she jumped, realized what she was doing and gently sat down on the other side to do the same.
She settled back carefully against the pillow, closing her eyes. She felt the bed shift slightly as Max did the same on the other side. A feeling of peace so unexpectedly settled over her, her eyes snapped open again.
For one split second, the entire world had shifted, had felt supremely [I]right[/I] in a way that she could not explain. In a way she had never thought to experience again. In a way she realized she had [I]not[/I] experienced in a very long time.
She jumped slightly when the silence that had descended over the room was broken by Max, who whispered, "Liz?"
"Yeah?"
"Thank you." It was simply stated but it made her heart beat a mile a minute.
She swallowed. "You're welcome." She whispered back, turning onto other side so that she met his eyes over Ben, who was already sound asleep and snoring slightly.
His dark eyes were bright with a longing so intense, she felt her heart turn over in her chest. "Have a good sleep." She said lightly, trying to break the moment.
He broke eye contact with her, turned over onto his back, throwing his arm over his face. "Sweet dreams." He replied quietly. She felt her heart beating a mile a minute again, just looking at him.
Liz turned over again, knowing, without a shadow of a doubt, that she was going to dream of him.
To be continued...