The TempestXtreme Talk Show!

AH! It's coming right for us!!

By TempestXtreme

NOTE: This episode is rated R for language and violence (hell, this is South Park we're talking about here! What did you expect?)

Disclaimer: I own only my own characters – the little brats from South Park belong to the deranged idiots that created them.

Tempest walked on stage and waved. "Welcome to my show! Eve's not here 'cause she's on her honeymoon!"

"Where?"

"Hawaii, why… Uh oh."

Tempest paled as Xellos vanished from where he was standing. Oh crap.

A portal opened seconds later, and Xellos came running out of it with an entire army of robotic Barney dolls at his heels. He stared for a moment before bursting out laughing. Xellos glared at him for a moment before teleporting away from the Barney dolls. Tempest wiped a tear away just as Eve's head appeared out of the portal. "How did the Freak find out where we were??!"

"I accidentally told him," Tempest said. He ducked the Kamehameha that Robert sent his way. "Ha! Missed!"

Eve glared at him before being pulled back by Robert, and the portal closed again.

"Arigato!"

"Huh? ACK!"

Xellos was wriggling around on the floor, having been hit by Robert's Kamehameha. Tempest shuddered and set the Barney dolls on him again. Then he turned back to the audience. "Well, anyway, today we're interviewing those little brats from South Park!"

The audience blinked and crickets chirped.

Backstage, Lashana let off a scream of rage and sent a fireball at Tempest, not bothered when he ducked it and let it fry the camera guy.

"It's MY show!" Tempest said. "I can interview whoever the hell I want!"

"THAT DOESN'T MEAN THAT I HAVE TO LIKE IT!!"

Tempest sighed and signalled for a commercial break.

*-*-*-*-*-*

The new announcer looked nervous. Why? Simple: the item he was advertising was the newest type of explosive that Tempest's personal luna – er, scientists – had cooked up for the common person.

"This is the…"

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*-*-*-*-*-*

"Welcome back to our show!" Tempest said. "Here are our guests, those kids from South Park!"

Stanley, Kyle, Kenny and Cartman were sitting down comfortably.

Of course, they had nothing clean to say.

"This place is fuckin' cool!"

"It's bigger than Cartman's fat ass!"

Kenny mumbled, the others laughed; Tempest blinked, scratched his head and looked confused. "You UNDERSTOOD that?!"

"Of course we did you stupid piece of shit," Cartman said. "What's wrong? Is the crack you smoked this morning affecting your brain?"

They laughed.

Tempest got pissed and blasted the studio with a thunder blast…and Kenny got fried by about 10 000 volts of electricity.

"Oh my god! They killed Kenny!" Kyle said.

"You bastard!"

Cartman laughed, and got hit in the face by a fireball. Tempest grinned. "Thanks Lashana!"

"No problem!"

Cartman was about to say something else, but Tempest cut him off by opening a portal directly under him and sending him and his friends to Xellos. He grinned when he heard them scream moments later.

"That's all for today, folks!" he said, turning to the audience and stopping when he saw that they were all stunned from his Thunder Blast. "Oops."

The End ^_^