That 70's Show
"And that was the first time she'd ever flown a plane." The newscaster was saying as Donna, Jackie, Hyde, Eric and Fez were all in the basement watching nothing about nothing when Kellso burst through the door.
"Hey guys guess what! I just heard that there was a fire down at the school!"
"Did you set it?" Hyde asked without taking his eyes off the television.
"No."
"Is it still going?" Hyde asked still not moving.
"No." Kellso shook his head.
"Did it wreck anything?" Hyde asked his expression remained unchanging.
"No not really." Kellso shrugged, his voice not as loud with excitement now.
"Then why bother telling us?" Hyde asked, finally looking at him. Kellso lowered his head and the others turned away from him and went back to watching the boring news.
Hanging out,
Down the street.
The same old thing,
We did last week.
Not a thing to do,
But talk to you.
We're all alright, We're all alright!
It was morning and Red was sitting at the table reading the newspaper when Eric came in from the livingroom.
"So finally up hey dumbass." Red said, without taking his eyes off the paper.
"Uh dad, incase you haven't noticed, it's Sunday."
Red lowered the paper semi-thoughtfully, "Huh, well I guess that explains why your mom is gone." Red shrugged and began to read the paper again.
"Dad, didn't you notice the word Sunday at the top of the paper?"
Red smiled, "Nope, I guess not." And he turned the page in the sports section.
"Never mind then." Eric muttered as he turned around.
"Oh and Eric," Red began and his son turned back around. "With your mom not here, only you know how to make me pancakes for breakfast." He grinned. "And I'm starved."
"Yes dad." Eric sighed and began to get out the ingredients.
Meanwhile Kitty was at church talking to the reverend after his sermon.
"So, where's Red?" He asked.
"Oh, well, we had a fight last night and afterwards I told him he's on his own, I'm not doing anything else for him." Kitty said as she put a hand mirror into her purse.
"And that includes taking him to church?" He asked and Kitty nodded. "Hmm, I wouldn't be surprised if the lazy lump is still in bed."
"You know something, you're right. I'm sorry, I'd better get home." Kitty left swiftly.
"Oh that's fine, don't mind me." He sighed with a nervous laugh, the place was empty now. "Nobody cares about the lonely old reverend..." His solo voice echoed through the big deserted church.
Back at home, everyone was already over in the basement, but since Red was home they couldn't do what they usually do where they light up the room and get high. They had to act sober.
"So how do we get Red out of the house?" Donna asked.
"I dunno, but I think it would have to do with making him and my mom patch things up." Eric suggested.
"Ok, so how do we do that?" Hyde asked.
"Oh, I love talking about love." Fez said, dazed in his own world.
"Ok, how come he's high?" Kellso pointed to Fez.
"I'm high on love." Fez said dreamily.
"None for me thanks." Hyde shook his head with a smirk.
"Guys, this is serious. If we don't get Red out of the house by making them patch things up, we could be like this forever." Eric's voice was quiet and nervous. "And I can't take this man!"
"Ok then, how do we do it?" Donna asked.
"Do what?" Eric asked.
"Ok, I officially name myself the leader and brains of this group." Hyde muttered.
"I'm sorry did you say something, I was lost in your eyes." Fez smiled.
"Uh, whatever you guys are talking about, I must really be lost." Kellso laughed stupidly.
"Red, are you here?" Kitty asked as she closed the glass door. "Red?" She walked to the livingroom and found him watching a football game. "Red?"
"What?" He groaned loudly and Kitty jerked back. Red hesitated slightly.
"I think it's time we made up." She sat down next to him and he rolled his eyes.
Just then Eric entered the room, "Mom I think you and dad should, never mind..." He saw them and turned back around and exited quickly.
"Red, I'm sorry about our fight last night." Kitty sighed, neither of them had taken notice to Eric's quick entrance and exit, or that he was even present for a moment at all.
"We had a what when?" Red asked as he flipped through channels.
Kitty pouted, and cried out, "You mean you don't even remember what we we're fighting about?"
"Well do you?" Red turned to her for a brief moment.
"Well I..." Kitty stammered. "I, I'm so mad right now that I forgot."
"Ok." Red grinned and turned back away, the brief moment just ended.
"Red, just say you're sorry." Kitty sighed.
"And that will make everything alright?" Red asked, a little confused at the easy way out.
"Yes. I said sorry, now you."
"Ok, alright, I'm sorry."
"Thank you. Kitty. So now you can go and do whatever it is you do on Sunday."
"Alright then." Red smiled and turned off the football game. "I'm going out." He left.
"Oh well, I guess I might as well go out too." Kitty sighed and went to the store.
Eric peered around the corner and watched them both leave. They'd usually be gone for a long time, so he figured this was as good enough as victory would get.
"Guys it worked, they made up." Eric announced as he ran downstairs. Everyone cheered.
"Now let's get this postponed party started!" Kellso stood up, throwing his arms in the air.
"Party, what party? I don't remember being invited." Fez said obliviously.
In less than half a second, the room was full of the rejuvenating smoke that made the gang feel happy and normal again.
"Ah, it's so good to be home." Hyde grinned, relieved.
"What are you talking about, this is Eric's house, err, basement." Donna said.
"Donna, who cares?" Eric laughed.
"I care, I care a lot." Fez smiled.
"Fez, that's not what I mean." Eric said solemnly.
"Oh, alright." Fez muttered and lowered his head.
"You know something?" Kellso began but had to clear his throat. "You never realize how much you really need or like something until, cough, until you loose it, cough, and then you miss it when it's gone.
"Ok, what are you saying, you're not making any sense." Hyde said.
"Just ignore him." Donna suggested
"Oh yea, that usually works." Hyde grinned.
"Besides, this is Kellso we're talking about, has he ever made sense?" Donna asked.
"Um, no." Eric said after thinking for a moment.
"Nothing in life makes sense." Fez sighed sadly.
"Can we please stop talking about me and, cough, talk about something more important?" Kellso asked, getting annoyed that they were making fun of him.
"Ok fine, Kellso does have a point. So, what should we talk about?" Hyde asked.
"I dunno, I was the one who, cough, asked the, cough, cough, question." Kellso replied.
"Oh yea. Donna?" Hyde turned to her.
"How should I know, I just enjoy sitting here." Donna shrugged with a satisfied grin.
"Hey that's a good idea..." Eric stopped. "Hey Kellso are you coughing or something?"
"Maybe you're getting to weak for this stuff." Fez laughed.
"What?" Kellso asked, not really knowing what they were talking about.
"You're a weakling." Fez replied. "Go outside."
"No." Kellso replied cooly but then yelled, "I am not!" But then asked. "Why would you say that anyway?"
"Oh I dunno, maybe because you're coughing?" Fez yelled sarcastically.
"I am, cough, not coughing!" Kellso growled but then gasped. "Whoa. Oh wait, I am!"
"Dam Kellso, you really are slow." Hyde laughed.
"No seriously guys, he is." Donna stopped him.
"Are you alright man?" Eric asked.
"Of course he's not, he's a Kellso and he's a coughing, what could be worse?" Donna teased.
"Oh no, we're all gonna get stupid germs!" Hyde laughed.
"Hey guys shut, cough, up!" Kellso growled with a slightly amused smile.
"Eric, we're home!" Kitty's voice was heard.
"Oh no, they're early!" Eric cried. "Quick, clear it up and clean up." They began to clear out the basement until it was clean and clear when she came down.
"So, did you guys have fun?" She asked.
"Yes." They all grinned simultaneously up at her.
"Well if you come upstairs I got you all some snacks." She smiled and left.
"That was close." Eric wiped his brow and breathed out in relief as everyone sighed.
"Yea, Captain Cooties here almost blew our cover." Hyde socked Kellso in the arm.
"Ow!" He rubbed it but then smiled with a goofy laugh. "Ha, Captain Cooties, haha."
"Hey guys, I just realized something." Donna spoked up and they turned to her. "When we go up there, Kitty's gonna find out that Kellso is coughing."
"So?" Kellso just shrugged cooly.
"So, my mom is a nurse." Eric added. "She has a natural, thing inside her to find out what's wrong with people so she can make them feel alright."
"So?"
"So, she's gonna find out what goes on down here." Hyde growled. "Kellso you idiot!"
"Well, God, what did I do now?!"
"Oh no, our cover is blown!" Fez cried.
"No, not yet it isn't." Eric began to think. "Kellso, when I give the word, run out the door and run home and stay home.
"Ok." Kellso nodded "What word?"
"When I say the word, go." Eric replied and Kellso nodded. They went upstairs and Kellso waited by the door. "Hey mom."
Kitty looked around, "Where's Michael?" She took the groceries out of their bags.
"Oh he had to, go, home." Eric said and Kellso ran out the door in a comical fashion and nearly slipped and hit the glass. Hyde tried not to laugh.
"What's so funny Steven?" Kitty asked, putting a hand on her hip.
"Oh nothing mam." Hyde smiled.
"Well I got you some chips and sodas, so make yourselves at home." Kitty grinned.
Everyone dug into the food as Kitty went out of the kitchen to clean up the house. The next day, everyone came back over after Kitty and Red had gone off to work, now Kellso could come back safely.
"Hey guys." Eric said as he greeted them at the door and they went to the basement. "I was thinking about yesterday and realized that we should probably clear the basement of anything that would lead my parents onto a trail of seeing what we do down here."
"That's a good idea. I mean first Kellso then who knows." Donna agreed.
"Oh I know, then we all loose a place to hang out." Hyde nodded.
"No, we're in the red!" Fez cried.
"No, we're not in Red, nor Kitty. if we're in anything it's not trouble because we're gonna have do something we've never done before." Eric gulped (scary violin music plays). "We have to clean the basement." Eric looked at them, and they all gasped. A few hours later, they were still just laying around doing nothing. "Ok guys I'm serious, we really have to get to work now."
"You know guys, I was thinking." Donna said as she sat down. Fez looked up from his candy, Hyde from his magazine and Kellso turned down the tv. "We've been doing this for, God knows how many years. And well, nothing has ever happened before."
"So?" Everyone asked but just then Eric got it.
"So that means Kellso couldn't have gotten sick from it." He grinned.
"Oh, we are saved, the coast is clear!" Fez sighed with relief.
"Yea that is a relief." Hyde grinned. "So, you guys want another go?"
"Yea, why not?" Donna asked and soon the basement was back to normal with the group doing what they do best.
"Savor the moment guys." Hyde smiled. "Savor it."
"Yea, this never seemed so good." Eric grinned.
"Oh the way you are talking, it's really making me feel happy." Fez sighed happily.
"Ok, I think he's getting a little too high now." Hyde looked at him.
"Hey did you, cough, hear that?" Kellso gasped, they all were quiet. It was a door slamming.
"Kitty, Eric?" It was Red.
"Bail out! He'll catch onto us!" Eric cried and they all ran out the door.
"But guys, won't this look suspicious?" Kellso asked as he closed the door.
"Eric, you guys down here?" Red came down into the basement full of smoke. He sniffed the air. "Not fire, thank God. Hmm, not a barbeque. What is it, it smells like..." Outside everyone had run to Donna's house but they could still hear Red's angry yell. "Eric!"
"Uh oh." He gulped.
"Oohh, busted!" Hyde laughed.
"Oh no, now where are we gonna do it?" Fez cried.
They all looked around, dead silent. Eric came back into the basement to confront his red dad. Fez, Hyde and Donna had all run to her house, but Kellso decided to loyally stay with his friend.
"Explain." Red growled, pouting. The door was left open so soon all the smoke had dissolved or faded out.
"Well dad, uh, you see..." Eric stammered and a sheepish grin spread on his face.
"Uhm, Mr. Foreman?" Kellso stepped forward quietly.
"What is it Kellso?" Red groaned as he rolled his eyes and dropped his hands to his side.
"This is all my fault." He sighed and Eric jerked back, so did Red, both in shock. "You see, cough, I'm sick and I thought well, cough, I uh, cough, um, cough..."
"You idiot! Being in a room full of pot isn't gonna help your throat." Red sighed, realizing again how stupid Kellso could be. "You only use medicinal drugs like that if you're blind or something like that. Which you shouldn't even use for that. You don't use it for a little cough or wimpy sore throat!" As Red lectured, Kellso acted like an embarrassed kid. "Jackass." Red turned around and saw Eric. "Oh yea, you. Well ya nimrod, I'm sorry I blamed you, but just keep your friend out of trouble ok?"
"Oh, ok dad, sure thing." Eric nodded, still in shock.
"Yea, well." Red muttered and looked his son up and down before leaving the basement.
"Uh, is it over yet?" Hyde poked his head into the door.
"Yea come on in, Kellso saved my but." Eric said as they began to return.
"Kellso did what?" Hyde gasped but smirked. "Well, there's a first for everything."
"So now what?" Donna asked, just then Jackie entered after leaving work.
"Hey guys, what's up?" She asked and took off her hat. "Anything good happen?" Everyone groaned but soon she knew everything that happened and understood why the story wasn't told over a good room full of smoke. "Aw my poor baby." She hugged Kellso tightly so tight that he couldn't breathe. "You're my hero."
"Thanks, cough, Jackie." Kellso gasped, trying to breathe.
"What's wrong?" Jackie asked after kissing him.
"You're, wheeze, cutting off the oxygen to my brain." Kellso whispered and Jackie let go, he coughed a few times until he caught his breath.
Hyde turned on the TV and Fez and Donna sat down on the couch to join him. Eric turned up the volume and went to get a popsicle.
"Michael?" Jackie's strict tone of voice suddenly cut through the tranquility and he looked over.
"What?" He thought he'd done something wrong.
"Why didn't you tell me you were sick?" She put her hands on her hips.
"Oh I dunno." Kellso shrugged. "I guess I didn't want you to worry."
Jackie gasped and put her hand over her heart, "Aw, you're so sweet." She grinned and went to the icebox. "Here have a popsicle."
"Oh cool, grape!" He cried, but broke down into a coughing fit and started to collapse.
"Michael!" Jackie cried and ran over to try and help him stay up.
"Kellso!" Everyone gasped.
Hyde looked up from his magazine and looked around, "What's going on?"
"Get help!" Eric cried.
"Right, I'll go look for Leo." Hyde left everyone staring blankly in his direction even after he was gone, they sighed and turned back to each other.
"I'll go look for my dad." Donna suggested and got an odd look from the gang.
"No here, I'll go." Jackie got up and went to the basement door.
"But Jackie, what about Kellso?" Donna called and she turned around.
"What about him?" She rolled her eyes and left.
Eric and Donna stared blankly at her and turned back to Kellso who groaned and coughed before passing back out again.
Donna held his head up, "Are you ok?" She didn't get a response.
"Well, good think my parents aren't home." Eric sighed. Hyde and Leo finally arrived, and Leo carried a black bag.
"Oh good, you brought first aid." Donna sighed with relief.
"First aid? Well this is my first aid alright, the first aid I get every morning as soon as I get out of bed." Leo shrugged and began to open the bag.
"No wait!" Hyde spoke up and Leo stopped "Eric got us in trouble with Red."
"So you mean we can't hang over here anymore?" Leo asked in sad shock.
"Yup." Eric muttered.
"And to think I wanted to help you." Leo growled and stormed out of the basement. A few minutes later, Jackie returned with Bob.
"Hey Donna, what's up?" He patted her head.
"Oh, hey dad." She looked up. "It's Kellso, he's sick or something."
"Yea, we don't know what's wrong with him." Fez sighed.
"But I though you just said he was sick." Bob turned to him.
"Yea, but we don't know what's wrong with him." Fez replied.
"Well make up your mind, is he sick or not? You're giving me a headache!" Bob held his head.
"Dad!" Donna yelled and he turned to attention at her. "Look we have to do something."
"Yea, he could really be sick." Eric agreed.
"Well don't look at me, Eric's the one related to a doctor." Bob pointed.
"Nurse, my mom is a nurse!" Eric sighed.
"Bah, close enough". Bob waved his hand and began to leave.
"Wait, dad, where are you going?" Donna asked.
"I'm going out on a date. You never know, one of these could be the dream girl I've been looking for." Bob grinned but Donna crossed her arms at him. "Or the perfect mom for you." He added and closed the door. Donna rolled her eyes and suddenly Kellso began to stir.
"Kellso? Hey, are you ok?" She asked.
"I dunno. I guess so." He was blinking hard to try and get his eyes back into focus.
"Guys, maybe I should tell my mom or dad." Eric suggested.
"Good luck, maybe one of them is home now." Fez nodded and Eric went upstairs to a quiet house.
"Hello? Mom, dad?" He called, going through the house.
"Eric?" A voice answered, it was Kitty.
"Mom, what are you doing here, I thought you went back to work." Eric went into the living room to see her watching tv with a cup of hot coffee. She sighed and turned it off. "Let me guess, you and dad are still fighting?"
"Oh Eric." Kitty patted the couch and he sat down. "We aren't fighting, we're just having one of those, normal, relationship arguments." Kitty explained slowly. "It's nothing to be scared of."
"I'm not scared, that's not even why I'm here." Eric replied after a brief moment.
"Oh." Kitty turned her head away and gave an embarrassed laugh. "Well then, what's on your mind?"
"Well you see," Eric began but then began to think. "Wait, why are you and dad still fighting?"
"Oh Eric." Kitty grinned. "Well, you see, it's like this. Remember when you and Donna broke up?" Kitty asked but noticed Eric's expression. "Ok sorry, bad example. Well, we're just having a minor argument, but we already make up somewhat.""
"Well, that's a start." Eric shrugged. "So there's nothing to worry about?"
"Nope." Kitty decided to change the subject. "Well, so what's your problem?"
"Well." Eric began but then remembered what happened when Kellso fell off the water tower and got some unwanted flashbacks. "Uh, never mind. I actually forgot." He got up.
"Well when you remember, tell me ok?" Kitty smiled and Eric nodded and went back down to the basement.
"Hey Eric?" Donna called as he began to climb down the steps.
"I found Kitty's first aid box in the medicine cabinet." Fez called as he came down behind Eric, followed by Hyde.
"And I found Eric's dirty mag- never mind." He cut himself off after noticing Eric. He pouted and rolled his eyes with a sigh. So Hyde changed the subbed. "Anything?"
"Oh, uh no." Eric shook his head.
Jackie sighed sadly as she brushed Kellso's bangs with her hand. But she stopped and placed a hand on his forehead, "Oh my god, Donna, I think he's burning up with a fever, what do we do?" She panicked.
"Uh, Fez, bring the first aid over." Donna turned and Fez ran over with the white box. "Ok there's a thermometer here."
"Oh dear, this won't be pretty if this is like how we did it in my home country of." Fez began.
"No we don't do it like that." Eric assured.
"Oh thank God." Fez smiled and took his hand from off over his eyes.
"Here, open up and keep this in your mouth." Donna said, getting out the thermometer.
"Wow, I always wanted Donna to say that, but never in a position like this." Kellso grinned, a little dazed from his fever. Jackie hit him. "Ow, hey that hurt!"
"Oh, I'm sorry." Jackie gasped, forgetting that he was sick.
Everyone waited until Donna took the thermometer from out of Kellso's mouth, "Oh my god, he has a fever of over 102!" She cried.
"A what now?" Hyde asked, lowering the magazine slightly.
"Here man, take this." Eric handed Kellso his half eaten popsicle.
"Thanks man." He grinned and began to eat it. "Ow!"
"What is it?" Jackie asked.
"That hurt my throat." Kellso whimpered and the popsicle fell to the ground.
"Oh, five second rule!" Fez cried and picked it up, inspected it and began to eat it.
"Ew." Everybody turned away in disgust.
"What?" Fez shrugged to himself. Eric began to look through the first aid box.
"Kitty, are you home yet?" Red's voice was heard from upstairs.
"He's back from work." Donna gasped.
"Don't worry, it's alright, he already knows." Eric assured.
"Really?" Fez didn't look convinced.
"Oh I think they're down here." Kitty's voice was heard and she came down the stairs. "Hey kids, do you want to..." She stopped talking when she saw what was going on. "What is this?"
"Oh, uh, hi mom." Eric gulped.
"Are you guys playing with my first aid, you guys know better. You aren't five anymore." Kitty began to clean up the mess of her stuff.
Red came down, "I would from Kellso but not from the rest of you."
"But what were they doing with it?" Kitty asked the agreeing Red.
"They were probably playing doctor with the dumbass." Red pointed to Kellso who was laying on the couch, oblivious to reality.
"What? Why?" Kitty asked, confused.
"Because he's sick." Red rolled his eyes. "God Kitty, you're the nurse."
"Well I didn't know. He's sick?" Kitty gasped. "Guys get away from him, you'll get sick too!" Everybody jumped back, not having thought of that.
"Ok thanks." Kellso grumbled and began to cough.
Kitty put a hand on his forehead, "He has a fever."
"Duh." Everyone said and Kitty drew back slightly. She put her hand under Kellso's chin, "Oh my goodness." Everybody looked up at her cry. "You guys really should've told me sooner!" Kellso looked up, a little scared now.
"Why, is he that bad?" Eric asked and everyone glared at him. "What?"
"Oh shoot, I forgot I have to go pick up the dry cleaning." Kitty stomped her foot.
"What for?" Red asked. "You just did the laundry yesterday."
"Oh, you'll see." She gave a sly grin and walked off laughing. The gang stared blankly at her as she left, it seemed as if she'd forgotten all about Kellso.
"That can't be good." Red muttered with a sigh and began to leave.
"Wait dad, where are you going?" Eric asked and he turned.
"Yea, what about Kellso?" Hyde asked.
"I don't care Steven, you can take care of that dumbass for all I care." He shrugged.
"Oh goody, we get to play doctor!" Fez cried gleefuly.
"Not it." Everybody cried but Fez.
"Yay." He clapped his hands like a little kid.
"Boo." Kellso groaned and let his head flop back.
"Well, what am I gonna get to do guys?" Jackie asked, standing in the middle of the room.
"I dunno. I'd go home and get rid of that zit poking out of your chin." Hyde joked.
"Oh my god, where!" Jackie began to frantically feel about her face. "I'm sorry, I have to go home, this is an emergency!"
"Jackie!" Kellso cried and looked over at her.
"Oh I'm sorry honey, but this is important." She said and left.
"Oh and like I'm not?" Kellso said in shock to himself.
"You are to me, now come on and open up." Fez grinned.
"Ah." Kellso opened his mouth and breathed right in Fez's face.
"Oh my God!" Fez turned away and covered his face with his hand.
"What, is his breath that bad?" Hyde laughed in amusement.
"No, it's not that." Fez said, taking his hand off.
"What? What are you talking about?" Eric asked. "Here, let me see."
"Ah." Kellso opened his mouth again and Eric took a look.
"Oh wow, Fez wasn't kidding." He said.
"See, I told you, I don't kid." Fez pouted.
"Well, this is an odd moment in time." Hyde replied.
"You're mean." Fez frowned at Hyde.
"And you just realized this now?" Hyde asked with a laugh.
"That's it, I'm going home!" Fez stood up to leave.
"Well hey, what about me?" Kellso asked.
"Oh screw you!" Fez cried and left.
"Aw, now that's mean." Kellso pointed in Fez's direction.
"Come on Kellso, we have to get you help." Donna said, helping him up.
"It's that bad?" Kellso asked, starting to get a little scared now.
"Well, I'm not a doctor, but I can defiantly answer that with a yes." Eric said and they left the basement to go get Kellso some help and fast.
"And that was the first time she'd ever flown a plane." The newscaster was saying as Donna, Jackie, Hyde, Eric and Fez were all in the basement watching nothing about nothing when Kellso burst through the door.
"Hey guys guess what! I just heard that there was a fire down at the school!"
"Did you set it?" Hyde asked without taking his eyes off the television.
"No."
"Is it still going?" Hyde asked still not moving.
"No." Kellso shook his head.
"Did it wreck anything?" Hyde asked his expression remained unchanging.
"No not really." Kellso shrugged, his voice not as loud with excitement now.
"Then why bother telling us?" Hyde asked, finally looking at him. Kellso lowered his head and the others turned away from him and went back to watching the boring news.
Hanging out,
Down the street.
The same old thing,
We did last week.
Not a thing to do,
But talk to you.
We're all alright, We're all alright!
It was morning and Red was sitting at the table reading the newspaper when Eric came in from the livingroom.
"So finally up hey dumbass." Red said, without taking his eyes off the paper.
"Uh dad, incase you haven't noticed, it's Sunday."
Red lowered the paper semi-thoughtfully, "Huh, well I guess that explains why your mom is gone." Red shrugged and began to read the paper again.
"Dad, didn't you notice the word Sunday at the top of the paper?"
Red smiled, "Nope, I guess not." And he turned the page in the sports section.
"Never mind then." Eric muttered as he turned around.
"Oh and Eric," Red began and his son turned back around. "With your mom not here, only you know how to make me pancakes for breakfast." He grinned. "And I'm starved."
"Yes dad." Eric sighed and began to get out the ingredients.
Meanwhile Kitty was at church talking to the reverend after his sermon.
"So, where's Red?" He asked.
"Oh, well, we had a fight last night and afterwards I told him he's on his own, I'm not doing anything else for him." Kitty said as she put a hand mirror into her purse.
"And that includes taking him to church?" He asked and Kitty nodded. "Hmm, I wouldn't be surprised if the lazy lump is still in bed."
"You know something, you're right. I'm sorry, I'd better get home." Kitty left swiftly.
"Oh that's fine, don't mind me." He sighed with a nervous laugh, the place was empty now. "Nobody cares about the lonely old reverend..." His solo voice echoed through the big deserted church.
Back at home, everyone was already over in the basement, but since Red was home they couldn't do what they usually do where they light up the room and get high. They had to act sober.
"So how do we get Red out of the house?" Donna asked.
"I dunno, but I think it would have to do with making him and my mom patch things up." Eric suggested.
"Ok, so how do we do that?" Hyde asked.
"Oh, I love talking about love." Fez said, dazed in his own world.
"Ok, how come he's high?" Kellso pointed to Fez.
"I'm high on love." Fez said dreamily.
"None for me thanks." Hyde shook his head with a smirk.
"Guys, this is serious. If we don't get Red out of the house by making them patch things up, we could be like this forever." Eric's voice was quiet and nervous. "And I can't take this man!"
"Ok then, how do we do it?" Donna asked.
"Do what?" Eric asked.
"Ok, I officially name myself the leader and brains of this group." Hyde muttered.
"I'm sorry did you say something, I was lost in your eyes." Fez smiled.
"Uh, whatever you guys are talking about, I must really be lost." Kellso laughed stupidly.
"Red, are you here?" Kitty asked as she closed the glass door. "Red?" She walked to the livingroom and found him watching a football game. "Red?"
"What?" He groaned loudly and Kitty jerked back. Red hesitated slightly.
"I think it's time we made up." She sat down next to him and he rolled his eyes.
Just then Eric entered the room, "Mom I think you and dad should, never mind..." He saw them and turned back around and exited quickly.
"Red, I'm sorry about our fight last night." Kitty sighed, neither of them had taken notice to Eric's quick entrance and exit, or that he was even present for a moment at all.
"We had a what when?" Red asked as he flipped through channels.
Kitty pouted, and cried out, "You mean you don't even remember what we we're fighting about?"
"Well do you?" Red turned to her for a brief moment.
"Well I..." Kitty stammered. "I, I'm so mad right now that I forgot."
"Ok." Red grinned and turned back away, the brief moment just ended.
"Red, just say you're sorry." Kitty sighed.
"And that will make everything alright?" Red asked, a little confused at the easy way out.
"Yes. I said sorry, now you."
"Ok, alright, I'm sorry."
"Thank you. Kitty. So now you can go and do whatever it is you do on Sunday."
"Alright then." Red smiled and turned off the football game. "I'm going out." He left.
"Oh well, I guess I might as well go out too." Kitty sighed and went to the store.
Eric peered around the corner and watched them both leave. They'd usually be gone for a long time, so he figured this was as good enough as victory would get.
"Guys it worked, they made up." Eric announced as he ran downstairs. Everyone cheered.
"Now let's get this postponed party started!" Kellso stood up, throwing his arms in the air.
"Party, what party? I don't remember being invited." Fez said obliviously.
In less than half a second, the room was full of the rejuvenating smoke that made the gang feel happy and normal again.
"Ah, it's so good to be home." Hyde grinned, relieved.
"What are you talking about, this is Eric's house, err, basement." Donna said.
"Donna, who cares?" Eric laughed.
"I care, I care a lot." Fez smiled.
"Fez, that's not what I mean." Eric said solemnly.
"Oh, alright." Fez muttered and lowered his head.
"You know something?" Kellso began but had to clear his throat. "You never realize how much you really need or like something until, cough, until you loose it, cough, and then you miss it when it's gone.
"Ok, what are you saying, you're not making any sense." Hyde said.
"Just ignore him." Donna suggested
"Oh yea, that usually works." Hyde grinned.
"Besides, this is Kellso we're talking about, has he ever made sense?" Donna asked.
"Um, no." Eric said after thinking for a moment.
"Nothing in life makes sense." Fez sighed sadly.
"Can we please stop talking about me and, cough, talk about something more important?" Kellso asked, getting annoyed that they were making fun of him.
"Ok fine, Kellso does have a point. So, what should we talk about?" Hyde asked.
"I dunno, I was the one who, cough, asked the, cough, cough, question." Kellso replied.
"Oh yea. Donna?" Hyde turned to her.
"How should I know, I just enjoy sitting here." Donna shrugged with a satisfied grin.
"Hey that's a good idea..." Eric stopped. "Hey Kellso are you coughing or something?"
"Maybe you're getting to weak for this stuff." Fez laughed.
"What?" Kellso asked, not really knowing what they were talking about.
"You're a weakling." Fez replied. "Go outside."
"No." Kellso replied cooly but then yelled, "I am not!" But then asked. "Why would you say that anyway?"
"Oh I dunno, maybe because you're coughing?" Fez yelled sarcastically.
"I am, cough, not coughing!" Kellso growled but then gasped. "Whoa. Oh wait, I am!"
"Dam Kellso, you really are slow." Hyde laughed.
"No seriously guys, he is." Donna stopped him.
"Are you alright man?" Eric asked.
"Of course he's not, he's a Kellso and he's a coughing, what could be worse?" Donna teased.
"Oh no, we're all gonna get stupid germs!" Hyde laughed.
"Hey guys shut, cough, up!" Kellso growled with a slightly amused smile.
"Eric, we're home!" Kitty's voice was heard.
"Oh no, they're early!" Eric cried. "Quick, clear it up and clean up." They began to clear out the basement until it was clean and clear when she came down.
"So, did you guys have fun?" She asked.
"Yes." They all grinned simultaneously up at her.
"Well if you come upstairs I got you all some snacks." She smiled and left.
"That was close." Eric wiped his brow and breathed out in relief as everyone sighed.
"Yea, Captain Cooties here almost blew our cover." Hyde socked Kellso in the arm.
"Ow!" He rubbed it but then smiled with a goofy laugh. "Ha, Captain Cooties, haha."
"Hey guys, I just realized something." Donna spoked up and they turned to her. "When we go up there, Kitty's gonna find out that Kellso is coughing."
"So?" Kellso just shrugged cooly.
"So, my mom is a nurse." Eric added. "She has a natural, thing inside her to find out what's wrong with people so she can make them feel alright."
"So?"
"So, she's gonna find out what goes on down here." Hyde growled. "Kellso you idiot!"
"Well, God, what did I do now?!"
"Oh no, our cover is blown!" Fez cried.
"No, not yet it isn't." Eric began to think. "Kellso, when I give the word, run out the door and run home and stay home.
"Ok." Kellso nodded "What word?"
"When I say the word, go." Eric replied and Kellso nodded. They went upstairs and Kellso waited by the door. "Hey mom."
Kitty looked around, "Where's Michael?" She took the groceries out of their bags.
"Oh he had to, go, home." Eric said and Kellso ran out the door in a comical fashion and nearly slipped and hit the glass. Hyde tried not to laugh.
"What's so funny Steven?" Kitty asked, putting a hand on her hip.
"Oh nothing mam." Hyde smiled.
"Well I got you some chips and sodas, so make yourselves at home." Kitty grinned.
Everyone dug into the food as Kitty went out of the kitchen to clean up the house. The next day, everyone came back over after Kitty and Red had gone off to work, now Kellso could come back safely.
"Hey guys." Eric said as he greeted them at the door and they went to the basement. "I was thinking about yesterday and realized that we should probably clear the basement of anything that would lead my parents onto a trail of seeing what we do down here."
"That's a good idea. I mean first Kellso then who knows." Donna agreed.
"Oh I know, then we all loose a place to hang out." Hyde nodded.
"No, we're in the red!" Fez cried.
"No, we're not in Red, nor Kitty. if we're in anything it's not trouble because we're gonna have do something we've never done before." Eric gulped (scary violin music plays). "We have to clean the basement." Eric looked at them, and they all gasped. A few hours later, they were still just laying around doing nothing. "Ok guys I'm serious, we really have to get to work now."
"You know guys, I was thinking." Donna said as she sat down. Fez looked up from his candy, Hyde from his magazine and Kellso turned down the tv. "We've been doing this for, God knows how many years. And well, nothing has ever happened before."
"So?" Everyone asked but just then Eric got it.
"So that means Kellso couldn't have gotten sick from it." He grinned.
"Oh, we are saved, the coast is clear!" Fez sighed with relief.
"Yea that is a relief." Hyde grinned. "So, you guys want another go?"
"Yea, why not?" Donna asked and soon the basement was back to normal with the group doing what they do best.
"Savor the moment guys." Hyde smiled. "Savor it."
"Yea, this never seemed so good." Eric grinned.
"Oh the way you are talking, it's really making me feel happy." Fez sighed happily.
"Ok, I think he's getting a little too high now." Hyde looked at him.
"Hey did you, cough, hear that?" Kellso gasped, they all were quiet. It was a door slamming.
"Kitty, Eric?" It was Red.
"Bail out! He'll catch onto us!" Eric cried and they all ran out the door.
"But guys, won't this look suspicious?" Kellso asked as he closed the door.
"Eric, you guys down here?" Red came down into the basement full of smoke. He sniffed the air. "Not fire, thank God. Hmm, not a barbeque. What is it, it smells like..." Outside everyone had run to Donna's house but they could still hear Red's angry yell. "Eric!"
"Uh oh." He gulped.
"Oohh, busted!" Hyde laughed.
"Oh no, now where are we gonna do it?" Fez cried.
They all looked around, dead silent. Eric came back into the basement to confront his red dad. Fez, Hyde and Donna had all run to her house, but Kellso decided to loyally stay with his friend.
"Explain." Red growled, pouting. The door was left open so soon all the smoke had dissolved or faded out.
"Well dad, uh, you see..." Eric stammered and a sheepish grin spread on his face.
"Uhm, Mr. Foreman?" Kellso stepped forward quietly.
"What is it Kellso?" Red groaned as he rolled his eyes and dropped his hands to his side.
"This is all my fault." He sighed and Eric jerked back, so did Red, both in shock. "You see, cough, I'm sick and I thought well, cough, I uh, cough, um, cough..."
"You idiot! Being in a room full of pot isn't gonna help your throat." Red sighed, realizing again how stupid Kellso could be. "You only use medicinal drugs like that if you're blind or something like that. Which you shouldn't even use for that. You don't use it for a little cough or wimpy sore throat!" As Red lectured, Kellso acted like an embarrassed kid. "Jackass." Red turned around and saw Eric. "Oh yea, you. Well ya nimrod, I'm sorry I blamed you, but just keep your friend out of trouble ok?"
"Oh, ok dad, sure thing." Eric nodded, still in shock.
"Yea, well." Red muttered and looked his son up and down before leaving the basement.
"Uh, is it over yet?" Hyde poked his head into the door.
"Yea come on in, Kellso saved my but." Eric said as they began to return.
"Kellso did what?" Hyde gasped but smirked. "Well, there's a first for everything."
"So now what?" Donna asked, just then Jackie entered after leaving work.
"Hey guys, what's up?" She asked and took off her hat. "Anything good happen?" Everyone groaned but soon she knew everything that happened and understood why the story wasn't told over a good room full of smoke. "Aw my poor baby." She hugged Kellso tightly so tight that he couldn't breathe. "You're my hero."
"Thanks, cough, Jackie." Kellso gasped, trying to breathe.
"What's wrong?" Jackie asked after kissing him.
"You're, wheeze, cutting off the oxygen to my brain." Kellso whispered and Jackie let go, he coughed a few times until he caught his breath.
Hyde turned on the TV and Fez and Donna sat down on the couch to join him. Eric turned up the volume and went to get a popsicle.
"Michael?" Jackie's strict tone of voice suddenly cut through the tranquility and he looked over.
"What?" He thought he'd done something wrong.
"Why didn't you tell me you were sick?" She put her hands on her hips.
"Oh I dunno." Kellso shrugged. "I guess I didn't want you to worry."
Jackie gasped and put her hand over her heart, "Aw, you're so sweet." She grinned and went to the icebox. "Here have a popsicle."
"Oh cool, grape!" He cried, but broke down into a coughing fit and started to collapse.
"Michael!" Jackie cried and ran over to try and help him stay up.
"Kellso!" Everyone gasped.
Hyde looked up from his magazine and looked around, "What's going on?"
"Get help!" Eric cried.
"Right, I'll go look for Leo." Hyde left everyone staring blankly in his direction even after he was gone, they sighed and turned back to each other.
"I'll go look for my dad." Donna suggested and got an odd look from the gang.
"No here, I'll go." Jackie got up and went to the basement door.
"But Jackie, what about Kellso?" Donna called and she turned around.
"What about him?" She rolled her eyes and left.
Eric and Donna stared blankly at her and turned back to Kellso who groaned and coughed before passing back out again.
Donna held his head up, "Are you ok?" She didn't get a response.
"Well, good think my parents aren't home." Eric sighed. Hyde and Leo finally arrived, and Leo carried a black bag.
"Oh good, you brought first aid." Donna sighed with relief.
"First aid? Well this is my first aid alright, the first aid I get every morning as soon as I get out of bed." Leo shrugged and began to open the bag.
"No wait!" Hyde spoke up and Leo stopped "Eric got us in trouble with Red."
"So you mean we can't hang over here anymore?" Leo asked in sad shock.
"Yup." Eric muttered.
"And to think I wanted to help you." Leo growled and stormed out of the basement. A few minutes later, Jackie returned with Bob.
"Hey Donna, what's up?" He patted her head.
"Oh, hey dad." She looked up. "It's Kellso, he's sick or something."
"Yea, we don't know what's wrong with him." Fez sighed.
"But I though you just said he was sick." Bob turned to him.
"Yea, but we don't know what's wrong with him." Fez replied.
"Well make up your mind, is he sick or not? You're giving me a headache!" Bob held his head.
"Dad!" Donna yelled and he turned to attention at her. "Look we have to do something."
"Yea, he could really be sick." Eric agreed.
"Well don't look at me, Eric's the one related to a doctor." Bob pointed.
"Nurse, my mom is a nurse!" Eric sighed.
"Bah, close enough". Bob waved his hand and began to leave.
"Wait, dad, where are you going?" Donna asked.
"I'm going out on a date. You never know, one of these could be the dream girl I've been looking for." Bob grinned but Donna crossed her arms at him. "Or the perfect mom for you." He added and closed the door. Donna rolled her eyes and suddenly Kellso began to stir.
"Kellso? Hey, are you ok?" She asked.
"I dunno. I guess so." He was blinking hard to try and get his eyes back into focus.
"Guys, maybe I should tell my mom or dad." Eric suggested.
"Good luck, maybe one of them is home now." Fez nodded and Eric went upstairs to a quiet house.
"Hello? Mom, dad?" He called, going through the house.
"Eric?" A voice answered, it was Kitty.
"Mom, what are you doing here, I thought you went back to work." Eric went into the living room to see her watching tv with a cup of hot coffee. She sighed and turned it off. "Let me guess, you and dad are still fighting?"
"Oh Eric." Kitty patted the couch and he sat down. "We aren't fighting, we're just having one of those, normal, relationship arguments." Kitty explained slowly. "It's nothing to be scared of."
"I'm not scared, that's not even why I'm here." Eric replied after a brief moment.
"Oh." Kitty turned her head away and gave an embarrassed laugh. "Well then, what's on your mind?"
"Well you see," Eric began but then began to think. "Wait, why are you and dad still fighting?"
"Oh Eric." Kitty grinned. "Well, you see, it's like this. Remember when you and Donna broke up?" Kitty asked but noticed Eric's expression. "Ok sorry, bad example. Well, we're just having a minor argument, but we already make up somewhat.""
"Well, that's a start." Eric shrugged. "So there's nothing to worry about?"
"Nope." Kitty decided to change the subject. "Well, so what's your problem?"
"Well." Eric began but then remembered what happened when Kellso fell off the water tower and got some unwanted flashbacks. "Uh, never mind. I actually forgot." He got up.
"Well when you remember, tell me ok?" Kitty smiled and Eric nodded and went back down to the basement.
"Hey Eric?" Donna called as he began to climb down the steps.
"I found Kitty's first aid box in the medicine cabinet." Fez called as he came down behind Eric, followed by Hyde.
"And I found Eric's dirty mag- never mind." He cut himself off after noticing Eric. He pouted and rolled his eyes with a sigh. So Hyde changed the subbed. "Anything?"
"Oh, uh no." Eric shook his head.
Jackie sighed sadly as she brushed Kellso's bangs with her hand. But she stopped and placed a hand on his forehead, "Oh my god, Donna, I think he's burning up with a fever, what do we do?" She panicked.
"Uh, Fez, bring the first aid over." Donna turned and Fez ran over with the white box. "Ok there's a thermometer here."
"Oh dear, this won't be pretty if this is like how we did it in my home country of." Fez began.
"No we don't do it like that." Eric assured.
"Oh thank God." Fez smiled and took his hand from off over his eyes.
"Here, open up and keep this in your mouth." Donna said, getting out the thermometer.
"Wow, I always wanted Donna to say that, but never in a position like this." Kellso grinned, a little dazed from his fever. Jackie hit him. "Ow, hey that hurt!"
"Oh, I'm sorry." Jackie gasped, forgetting that he was sick.
Everyone waited until Donna took the thermometer from out of Kellso's mouth, "Oh my god, he has a fever of over 102!" She cried.
"A what now?" Hyde asked, lowering the magazine slightly.
"Here man, take this." Eric handed Kellso his half eaten popsicle.
"Thanks man." He grinned and began to eat it. "Ow!"
"What is it?" Jackie asked.
"That hurt my throat." Kellso whimpered and the popsicle fell to the ground.
"Oh, five second rule!" Fez cried and picked it up, inspected it and began to eat it.
"Ew." Everybody turned away in disgust.
"What?" Fez shrugged to himself. Eric began to look through the first aid box.
"Kitty, are you home yet?" Red's voice was heard from upstairs.
"He's back from work." Donna gasped.
"Don't worry, it's alright, he already knows." Eric assured.
"Really?" Fez didn't look convinced.
"Oh I think they're down here." Kitty's voice was heard and she came down the stairs. "Hey kids, do you want to..." She stopped talking when she saw what was going on. "What is this?"
"Oh, uh, hi mom." Eric gulped.
"Are you guys playing with my first aid, you guys know better. You aren't five anymore." Kitty began to clean up the mess of her stuff.
Red came down, "I would from Kellso but not from the rest of you."
"But what were they doing with it?" Kitty asked the agreeing Red.
"They were probably playing doctor with the dumbass." Red pointed to Kellso who was laying on the couch, oblivious to reality.
"What? Why?" Kitty asked, confused.
"Because he's sick." Red rolled his eyes. "God Kitty, you're the nurse."
"Well I didn't know. He's sick?" Kitty gasped. "Guys get away from him, you'll get sick too!" Everybody jumped back, not having thought of that.
"Ok thanks." Kellso grumbled and began to cough.
Kitty put a hand on his forehead, "He has a fever."
"Duh." Everyone said and Kitty drew back slightly. She put her hand under Kellso's chin, "Oh my goodness." Everybody looked up at her cry. "You guys really should've told me sooner!" Kellso looked up, a little scared now.
"Why, is he that bad?" Eric asked and everyone glared at him. "What?"
"Oh shoot, I forgot I have to go pick up the dry cleaning." Kitty stomped her foot.
"What for?" Red asked. "You just did the laundry yesterday."
"Oh, you'll see." She gave a sly grin and walked off laughing. The gang stared blankly at her as she left, it seemed as if she'd forgotten all about Kellso.
"That can't be good." Red muttered with a sigh and began to leave.
"Wait dad, where are you going?" Eric asked and he turned.
"Yea, what about Kellso?" Hyde asked.
"I don't care Steven, you can take care of that dumbass for all I care." He shrugged.
"Oh goody, we get to play doctor!" Fez cried gleefuly.
"Not it." Everybody cried but Fez.
"Yay." He clapped his hands like a little kid.
"Boo." Kellso groaned and let his head flop back.
"Well, what am I gonna get to do guys?" Jackie asked, standing in the middle of the room.
"I dunno. I'd go home and get rid of that zit poking out of your chin." Hyde joked.
"Oh my god, where!" Jackie began to frantically feel about her face. "I'm sorry, I have to go home, this is an emergency!"
"Jackie!" Kellso cried and looked over at her.
"Oh I'm sorry honey, but this is important." She said and left.
"Oh and like I'm not?" Kellso said in shock to himself.
"You are to me, now come on and open up." Fez grinned.
"Ah." Kellso opened his mouth and breathed right in Fez's face.
"Oh my God!" Fez turned away and covered his face with his hand.
"What, is his breath that bad?" Hyde laughed in amusement.
"No, it's not that." Fez said, taking his hand off.
"What? What are you talking about?" Eric asked. "Here, let me see."
"Ah." Kellso opened his mouth again and Eric took a look.
"Oh wow, Fez wasn't kidding." He said.
"See, I told you, I don't kid." Fez pouted.
"Well, this is an odd moment in time." Hyde replied.
"You're mean." Fez frowned at Hyde.
"And you just realized this now?" Hyde asked with a laugh.
"That's it, I'm going home!" Fez stood up to leave.
"Well hey, what about me?" Kellso asked.
"Oh screw you!" Fez cried and left.
"Aw, now that's mean." Kellso pointed in Fez's direction.
"Come on Kellso, we have to get you help." Donna said, helping him up.
"It's that bad?" Kellso asked, starting to get a little scared now.
"Well, I'm not a doctor, but I can defiantly answer that with a yes." Eric said and they left the basement to go get Kellso some help and fast.