-------------------
Look! Look! It's another chapter! It's really short, but I'll send another one right after it I promise ^_^
See first chapter for disclaimer, warnings & such
Chapter Four: Hesitation
The next day at school, Touya suppressed a yawn as he watched his chemistry teacher illustrate some simple concept on the chalkboard. He was already having a hard enough time concentrating on his schoolwork and this definitely wasn't helping.
Touya watched Yukito out of the corner of his eye. He was still uncertain where their relationship stood now. Yukito seemed just as cheerful as ever this morning when they had met before school and he had vague memories of his friend stopping by to check on him yesterday afternoon when he had been sick in bed, but there seemed to be something missing in their interactions now. Maybe it was that possibility that had always flitted between their words of something beyond friendship. Something beyond the simple greetings and kind gestures. Touya wasn't sure, but his heart ached at its absence. He could feel Yukito slipping away from him almost tangibly and he had no idea what to do about it, but it scared him.
Touya fidgeted in his seat and stared up at the clock on the wall. He was tired and there were only a few more minutes left of the school day. He was glad to see it end despite the makeup work he still needed to complete. The sooner he could get home and be alone in the confines of his own room the better. Then he could get away from the stares of classmates who had noticed a distance between him and Yukito since that sunny afternoon that felt like ages ago. He could get away from those cheery brown eyes smiling back at him from within Yukito's familiar face that had somehow lost their familiarity over the space of less than two days. Touya didn't know how to explain it, but his confession had changed things between the two of them in more ways than he ever thought possible. They were subtle changes and that was what made all of the difference. He could have handled more abrupt changes better he thought. If Yukito had refused to speak to him or had yelled at him in anger, Touya would have known how to respond. He would have known the difference between a friendly face and an angry one. He could have pinpointed exactly where the differences lie and known for sure that every thing had changed considerably. But now things appeared almost the same as before with only very minor differences. They left him to wonder if maybe he was the one who had changed.
Touya closed his textbook and shuffled his notes into a binder before packing his things into his backpack at the sound of the bell. He could feel Yukito's gaze on him as the class filed out of the room leaving only the two of them alone inside. Touya looked over at his friend and found Yukito staring at him with wide uncertain eyes. Touya frowned briefly at the sadness within them as well. He hadn't expected to see such an emotion there.
"Do you want to come over to my house to study, To-ya?" Yukito asked hesitantly. He seemed to be trying his best to seem nonchalant about the question. After all, such a query would have been nonchalant only a few days ago, but now it held a much deeper significance. Going to Yukito's house to study would have been familiar and safe. It would have suggested that their friendship really hadn't changed and it could even survive something as troubling as unrequited love, but it would also gloss over the depth of the pain Touya felt at the remembrance of Yukito's denial the other day and ignore the sadness in Yukito's own gaze at the moment. It would be so easy to just move on and put that glitch behind them, but it wouldn't do justice to the closeness of their relationship or the depth of their friendship.
Touya shook his head and tried his best to smile sincerely at Yukito. "Maybe some other time, Yuki. I'm pretty tired and I should get home."
Yukito nodded and looked down at the floor. "I hope you feel better soon."
Touya paused on his way towards the door. His eyes widened slightly at the statement and he had to remind himself that Yukito was only concerned about his physical health and not the state of his mind at the moment, but as he glanced over at his friend he wondered which way Yukito really meant it. Yukito's eyes still held the same sense of uncertainty and his lips were down turned in a small frown that didn't seem to belong on his usually cheerful face.
Touya nodded in thanks and slipped out of the door before he could analyze that frown too much more. He didn't want to think about what it might mean or how it might play a role in Yukito's words outside the coffee shop. He knew it would be dangerous to assign motives and feelings to his friend when he really had no reason to believe that those words had been untrue.
TBC
-------------------
Look! Look! It's another chapter! It's really short, but I'll send another one right after it I promise ^_^
See first chapter for disclaimer, warnings & such
Chapter Four: Hesitation
The next day at school, Touya suppressed a yawn as he watched his chemistry teacher illustrate some simple concept on the chalkboard. He was already having a hard enough time concentrating on his schoolwork and this definitely wasn't helping.
Touya watched Yukito out of the corner of his eye. He was still uncertain where their relationship stood now. Yukito seemed just as cheerful as ever this morning when they had met before school and he had vague memories of his friend stopping by to check on him yesterday afternoon when he had been sick in bed, but there seemed to be something missing in their interactions now. Maybe it was that possibility that had always flitted between their words of something beyond friendship. Something beyond the simple greetings and kind gestures. Touya wasn't sure, but his heart ached at its absence. He could feel Yukito slipping away from him almost tangibly and he had no idea what to do about it, but it scared him.
Touya fidgeted in his seat and stared up at the clock on the wall. He was tired and there were only a few more minutes left of the school day. He was glad to see it end despite the makeup work he still needed to complete. The sooner he could get home and be alone in the confines of his own room the better. Then he could get away from the stares of classmates who had noticed a distance between him and Yukito since that sunny afternoon that felt like ages ago. He could get away from those cheery brown eyes smiling back at him from within Yukito's familiar face that had somehow lost their familiarity over the space of less than two days. Touya didn't know how to explain it, but his confession had changed things between the two of them in more ways than he ever thought possible. They were subtle changes and that was what made all of the difference. He could have handled more abrupt changes better he thought. If Yukito had refused to speak to him or had yelled at him in anger, Touya would have known how to respond. He would have known the difference between a friendly face and an angry one. He could have pinpointed exactly where the differences lie and known for sure that every thing had changed considerably. But now things appeared almost the same as before with only very minor differences. They left him to wonder if maybe he was the one who had changed.
Touya closed his textbook and shuffled his notes into a binder before packing his things into his backpack at the sound of the bell. He could feel Yukito's gaze on him as the class filed out of the room leaving only the two of them alone inside. Touya looked over at his friend and found Yukito staring at him with wide uncertain eyes. Touya frowned briefly at the sadness within them as well. He hadn't expected to see such an emotion there.
"Do you want to come over to my house to study, To-ya?" Yukito asked hesitantly. He seemed to be trying his best to seem nonchalant about the question. After all, such a query would have been nonchalant only a few days ago, but now it held a much deeper significance. Going to Yukito's house to study would have been familiar and safe. It would have suggested that their friendship really hadn't changed and it could even survive something as troubling as unrequited love, but it would also gloss over the depth of the pain Touya felt at the remembrance of Yukito's denial the other day and ignore the sadness in Yukito's own gaze at the moment. It would be so easy to just move on and put that glitch behind them, but it wouldn't do justice to the closeness of their relationship or the depth of their friendship.
Touya shook his head and tried his best to smile sincerely at Yukito. "Maybe some other time, Yuki. I'm pretty tired and I should get home."
Yukito nodded and looked down at the floor. "I hope you feel better soon."
Touya paused on his way towards the door. His eyes widened slightly at the statement and he had to remind himself that Yukito was only concerned about his physical health and not the state of his mind at the moment, but as he glanced over at his friend he wondered which way Yukito really meant it. Yukito's eyes still held the same sense of uncertainty and his lips were down turned in a small frown that didn't seem to belong on his usually cheerful face.
Touya nodded in thanks and slipped out of the door before he could analyze that frown too much more. He didn't want to think about what it might mean or how it might play a role in Yukito's words outside the coffee shop. He knew it would be dangerous to assign motives and feelings to his friend when he really had no reason to believe that those words had been untrue.
TBC
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