This Heavenly Child
By teacherchezDisclaimer: don't own 'em.
Nothing else matters any more. I'm holding my baby, I've got my friends around me, and I'm happy. Who cares about work, fashion, even guys? I never thought that one little creature could change someone's life so much. One tiny baby, only a few minutes old, and yet she's made me so happy!
And what's the best part? Maybe this wonderful child will help me to find true love again. I've only once been truly in love. It was the most wonderful experience of my life, to have a shared love, with my soulmate, my lobster. And now, now I'm suffering from a love that's just as strong. It's a love that isn't being returned, a love that I don't dare to speak of, for fear of damaging my relationship with everyone.
If I told Ross about my feelings, Joey would be hurt. Chandler and Phoebe would side with Joey. Ross would be shocked, he might not feel the same way. If he didn't feel the same way, then Monica would be awkward with me. And my baby might never be close to the wonderful friends that I have now. But if this infant was to somehow help me, I would be eternally grateful to her – this fifteen minute old child, who has caused so much worry, pain, and, most of all, happiness, for all six of us.
I can't wait until this girl grows up, when she learns to walk, and talk. The day I hear my baby say "Mama", that will be the most wonderful day of my life. No, the second most wonderful day of my life. The best day, that was today.
I want to hear her first words, to see her sit up, crawl, walk and run. I want to take her shopping, to teach her about the joys of living in NYC. I'll stop her daddy boring her with dinosaur stories – but I'll teach her to respect him. I'll read to her each night, I'll watch television with her, and I'll even play endless board games with her. I'll do all those things, because that's what a good mother does. And I'm going to be a good mother. I promise.
I mean, I'll do all the nasty things too, like diaper changes, and midnight feeds, and I'll tell her off when she won't go to bed, and when she talks for hours on the phone. If she spends hundreds of dollars on clothes, I'll be angry, but I won't make her resent me. I'll let her watch TV, but not too late. I'll make her go to bed at regular hours, however much she complains.
But I'll be there for her. Whether it's at her first school play, or a dance recital, or if she's running in a race, or even just if she wants to have a good old chat, I'll be the one that she comes to. She'll learn that her mommy can listen, and will keep her secrets, and she won't tell Daddy. If my baby breaks one of her daddy's fossils, I'll take the blame. I won't let Ross get angry with my baby.
There'll be times when she'll hate my guts, I'm sure. But every girl hates her mother at times. I'll try to make her happy, so that we have a good relationship, so that she doesn't hate me so often. She'll probably get on my nerves too – if she's on the phone, and I want to have a good old gossip with Monica, I might yell. But she'll know that I love her, because I'm her mother.
But I'll love taking her out in her pram, pushing her around the Village, listening to people ooh and ah over my baby. I'll stand over her cradle, watching her sleep each night. I'll worry each time she cries, and I'll panic each time she's ill.
That's all part of being a parent. I didn't ask for it, but I'll do it gladly, now that she's here. I was terrified about not managing it, but now that my gorgeous child has arrived, I know that I can. And even if I can't, I'll be glad to learn. Anything, for the sake of this heavenly child.
A/N: Please review, and tell me what you think! I've never tried to get into Rachel's head before, despite my many journeys into both Chandler and Monica's.