Title - On My Side
Author - Nicky
Rating - G
Classification - Vignette
Spoilers - up to Nothing Important Happened Today II
Keywords - Mulder/Scully romance implied
Summary - Scully learns something new about Deputy Director
Kersh that causes her to see him in a new light.
Disclaimer - Most of these characters aren't mine. You know
that. And I know that. They're property of someone else and used
without permission strictly for entertainment purposes.
I roll my eyes and huff impatiently for probably the millionth
time during the conversation. Monica Reyes was going on and on
about something I really didn't want to take part in. She was as
determined to make me do as I was not to.
"But it's mandatory, Dana," I hear her say for time number million
and one. "Deputy Director Kersh says . . . "
"You know, I've never really cared before what the Deputy Director
says. Why should I start now?" I'm starting to whine, but I
don't care. The last thing I want to do is go to some party
thrown by Kerch just because he says so. That man has had too
much say in my life already. "Besides. I don't have a sitter for
William."
"Don't use him as an excuse," she says, catching on to my game.
"The invitation says this is an informal get together. A cookout
type of thing. And it also says families are strongly encouraged
to attend as well. That means William can come."
"Monica, I don't want that man to be able to use me or my son in
this campaign in good will or whatever it is. You know the only
reason why he's throwing this party is to try and placate the
masses. Morale is so low in the FBI right now that he *has* to do
something to show the Attorney General we're all not a bunch of
gun toting lunatics."
"It'll be fun," she says. I laugh. Yeah right. Fun and Deputy
Director Kersh are not things I associate together.
"Free food," she offers. I groan in frustration. She was really
getting desperate. I almost give in just to get her off my case.
But then I finally hear the magic words come out of her mouth.
"I'll babysit William every Friday night for a month so that you
can sleep in on Saturdays," she says.
"A whole month? You've got yourself a deal," I agree with a
smile.
* * * * * * * * * *
The party was that weekend. So by Saturday morning, I was about
ready to back out again. I haven't had too many run ins with
Kersh since Mulder's been gone. But seeing him will only remind
me of why I'm raising my son without his father. I don't know if
I can handle it. The knock at the door tells me that it's too late
to back out now. I walk across the living room to open it.
"Hi Dana," Monica says cheerfully. She steps into the apartment
while I go get William's bottles from the refrigerator to pack in
his back. When I return, she has the baby and is showing him off
to one of the most gorgeous men I think I've ever had the pleasure
of laying my eyes on.
"Hello," I say, tossing her a quizzical glare. Apparently she
learned a thing or two about my 'looks' from Mulder, because she
answers the question before I can even ask it.
"This is Jerrod. A new friend," she explains, giving me a glare
of her own in return. A look that said, 'I'll tell you all about
him later.' From the blush on both their cheeks, I could tell
that it was going to be some story.
"It's nice to meet you, Jerrod," I say, offering my hand to him.
"I'm Dana. And this is William."
"Nice to meet you too, Dana," he says with a silky, smooth voice
to match his creamy milk chocolate complexion and deep dark
chocolate eyes.
"Jerrod, can you take the stroller and baby bag to the car?"
Monica asks sweetly. "Dana and I will be down in a second." He
flashes one last heart melting grin before obeying her every
command.
"Wow," I gasp after leaves. "That's some guy you found, Monica.
He's very . . . "
"I think hot is the word you're looking for," she giggles. I
laugh with her, nodding enthusiastically.
"I don't think I've ever literally drooled over a guy before," I
gush.
"Hey, Mulder's no slouch," Monica reminds me.
"Oh, I know," I smile, blushing at how attractive I've always
found him. "He definitely lives up to his name."
"No kidding!" she agrees whole heartedly. A little *too* whole
heartedly.
"Monica! You better keep your hands on your own man and leave
mine alone," I warn her playfully.
"Yeah, and you keep your hands off of mine. Don't make me have to
tell Mulder on you." We fall into another fit of giggles before I
grab William's seat and we walk out the door.
* * * * * * * * * *
The party actually wasn't too bad. Most of the agents invited
were curious about William, but they didn't ask anything rude or
make any comments about Mulder. I had long ago stopped caring
what others said, but I was still a little reluctant about putting
myself into certain situations where I would possibly have to deal
with that. After a while, I find a nice quiet spot for ourselves
to relax a bit and just watch the crowd. But William wasn't
having any of that. He starts squiriming around in the stroller,
gearing up for what I've come to recognize as his 'change me' cry.
"What's the matter, Baby Boy?" I ask in a ridiculously high
squeaky voice that seems to always calm him. I stick my finger
inside his diaper and confirm my suspicions that he was wet. "You
need a new diaper? Is that what it is, my love?" I turn around
quickly when I hear someone chuckle behind me. It turns out to be
the deputy director's wife.
"I'm sorry," she says, still laughing. "You just don't hear many
FBI agents using that tone of voice."
"He seems to like it," I smile tightly, not sure how to act around
this woman. "Mrs. Kersh, do you have somewhere I can change him?"
"Of course, Dear," she says kindly. "I'll show you." She bends
down to get William's bag for me and I follow her into the house.
"You can leave the stroller right here. I have a changing area
set up upstairs."
I nod and lift William from the stroller and follow her up the
stairs.
"You have a lovely home, Mrs. Kersh," I tell her, trying to break
the silence. She had a gentle smile, but I was still a little
suspicious considering who her husband was.
"Thank you, Agent Scully."
I raise an eyebrow at her.
"You know who I am?" I ask her, feeling myself unconsciously hold
William tighter. He lets out a small cry of protest and I loosen
up on my grasp of him a little. "How do you know who I am? I
didn't realize I was one of your husband's favorite agents." We
stop in front of a room and she opens the door, ushering me
inside.
"Here," she says, pulling William from me. "Why don't I take
him."
I almost resist, but I hear her soft, soothing words towards
William and change my mind. She lays him on the changing table
that's been set up and begins to unbutton his pants.
"Hand me the wipes," she orders gently. She quickly and
proficiently changes the diaper, lifting the happy and dry baby
into her arms when she's done. She pulls him close to her chest
and takes a whiff of his baby fresh hair. "You are so precious,"
she coos. "I can see why your daddy had such a hard time leaving
you."
I gasp and she looks up to meet my eyes.
"How do you know us?" I ask her again. My voice was shaking, like
I was about to cry, but I didn't care.
"He looks so much like Fox," she tells me, seemingly ignoring my
questions and tears. She gives him a kiss on the forehead before
placing him back into my arms.
"How do you know Mulder?" I'm getting the feeling that I'm
wasting my breath with these questions. She just stares at me,
not saying anything. And not answering what I've been asking for
the past few minutes.
"He'll be back," she finally says. "He loves you. And he loves
William."
"How do you know that?"
"When he left, he came here. Alvin and I hid him for two days
before it was safe enough for him to leave town," she explains.
"What?" is all I can manage to gasp.
"He cried and cried that first day he was here. He sounded like a
man who's heart just got ripped out. In a way, I guess it had."
My mouth opens and closes a few times, wordless sounds seeping
from between my lips.
"Agent Scully, I know what you must think about my husband. He's
tough. He has to be. But he doesn't mean Fox any harm. He was
only trying to help him. To help all three of you."
"Really? He never wanted to help us before. Why now?" I say in a
mean, sarcastic tone that I instantly regret. The look on her
face turns sad, haunted even. I feel bad for what I said and try
to apologize. "Look, I'm sorry . . ."
"No," she interrupts me. "I understand. Alvin's told me about
the . . . difficulties he's had getting along with you and your
supporters. But believe me when I say that his intentions where
your family is concerned are honorable."
I nod, not really sure I believe her. I mean I believe that *she*
believes what she's saying, that she believes in her husband. But
I don't know if I'll ever be able to. That theory very quickly
gets tested when the deputy director himself comes walking into
the room.
"Agent Scully," he nods in my direction. "I'm glad you were able
to make it." He looks at me and can see the anger and confusion
flashing in my eyes. He looks next to his wife and can see the
sadness in hers. "What's going on in here?"
Right then, my little angel decides he no longer wanted to be left
out of the conversation. He starts flailing his arms and babbling
incessantly, wondering in his little baby brain why he wasn't the
center of attention. We all chuckle lightly at him.
"What was that, Little Guy? You getting tired of being left out?"
Kersh says, surprising me with his gentle tone. He reaches out
for William, glancing up at me for permission. "May I?"
"If he'll go to you," I tell him, with a nonchalant shrug trying
to play it cool on the outside. But inside, my heart was pounding
and I began to visually scan the room for danger.
But to my surprise, William eagerly reaches towards the man,
smiling brightly at him. To my even bigger surprise, Deputy
Director Kersh smiles back and starts, and I kid you not, to coo
at my son. He looks back at me with a smile that I can only
describe as grateful before imitating his wife's earlier actions.
He hugs William to his chest and takes a deep breath, enjoying his
fresh baby scent.
"How are the two of you doing? Really?" Kersh asks me, the
tenderness still evident in his voice.
"We're fine, Sir," I answer him, still confused by this completely
different Alvin Kersh than the one I'm used to seeing and promptly
running from.
"Agent Mulder warned me you'd say that," he grins. He gives
William one more hug before handing him back to me. "Honestly,
how are you?"
"We miss him, Sir. Very much. We want him home," I tell him, not
really sure why I'm being so forthcoming with him. He just nods
his head, as if he totally understands what I'm saying.
"Agent Scully, I know you don't have any reason to trust me or to
believe me, but if there was any other way . . . I just don't
think a man should be separated from his son. Ever." He looks to
his wife and his face soon reflects the sad, haunted image she
wore a few minutes ago. He grabs her hand and squeezes it for
quick second, making a vital connection that seems to have kept
them going all of these years.
"Well ladies, I think I'm heading back to my party now," he
announces, suddenly breaking the oppressing silence of the room
that even William seemed to respect. He turns to leave and we
watch him go. I'm too much in shock to say anything.
"We should be going back, too," I hear Mrs. Kersh say, although I
think it takes a few minutes for the words to make any sense in my
brain.
"Mrs. Kersh," I say, stopping her from walking out the door. I
don't want to ask, but I have to know. "I don't mean to be nosy,
but do you and the Deputy Director have any . . . " But then I
see that lost look in her eyes again, and I figure I'm better off
not knowing. "Nevermind. It's really none of my business."
"We called him AJ. Alvin Jr.," she says, her voice hoarse with
the unshed tears from years passed. He was just three when he
died. He was the light of my husband's light. That light died
with the baby. I didn't think I'd ever see that light again. But
I did. Just now when he was holding William." A small smile
spreads across her face.
"I'm sorry." I know it sounds lame, but that's all I can think to
say.
"Now you know why he's doing this. So that one day, you and Agent
Mulder will hopefully have more than three years to enjoy with
your son."
I smile at her and nod. Because I did understand. And for the
first time ever, I was grateful for Deputy Director Kersh.
* * * * * * * * * *
I convince Monica and Jerrod to leave well before the end of the
party. William was getting cranky and ready for a nap in his own
crib. They didn't seem to mind too much, though. I think they
had plans on a more private soiree anyway. On the way out, see
Kersh and his wife chatting with some other guests. I stop by
there on the way to the car.
"Sir, I just wanted to thank you for inviting William and I. We
had a really nice time," I say honestly. "In fact, I think
William would love to come back and visit. He seems to have made
a few new friends." William adds his input and lets out a happy
squeal, reaching a chubby hand out to the Deputy Director. "I may
have just found another babysitter, if you think you two are up
for it."
"Anytime, Agent Scully," Kersh smiles. "Maybe I'll be able to
keep *this* Mulder under control."
"Don't count on that, Sir," I say with a laugh. "He's going to be
just like his daddy."
I hug my sweet baby and kiss his plump cheek before saying our
last good-byes. This day hasn't turned out like anything I
expected. It's nice to know there are people on my side. I never
would have expected Deputy Director Kersh to be one of those
people. But I'm glad I was proved wrong.
The End.
Feedback please!!!
Thanks :-)
Author - Nicky
Rating - G
Classification - Vignette
Spoilers - up to Nothing Important Happened Today II
Keywords - Mulder/Scully romance implied
Summary - Scully learns something new about Deputy Director
Kersh that causes her to see him in a new light.
Disclaimer - Most of these characters aren't mine. You know
that. And I know that. They're property of someone else and used
without permission strictly for entertainment purposes.
I roll my eyes and huff impatiently for probably the millionth
time during the conversation. Monica Reyes was going on and on
about something I really didn't want to take part in. She was as
determined to make me do as I was not to.
"But it's mandatory, Dana," I hear her say for time number million
and one. "Deputy Director Kersh says . . . "
"You know, I've never really cared before what the Deputy Director
says. Why should I start now?" I'm starting to whine, but I
don't care. The last thing I want to do is go to some party
thrown by Kerch just because he says so. That man has had too
much say in my life already. "Besides. I don't have a sitter for
William."
"Don't use him as an excuse," she says, catching on to my game.
"The invitation says this is an informal get together. A cookout
type of thing. And it also says families are strongly encouraged
to attend as well. That means William can come."
"Monica, I don't want that man to be able to use me or my son in
this campaign in good will or whatever it is. You know the only
reason why he's throwing this party is to try and placate the
masses. Morale is so low in the FBI right now that he *has* to do
something to show the Attorney General we're all not a bunch of
gun toting lunatics."
"It'll be fun," she says. I laugh. Yeah right. Fun and Deputy
Director Kersh are not things I associate together.
"Free food," she offers. I groan in frustration. She was really
getting desperate. I almost give in just to get her off my case.
But then I finally hear the magic words come out of her mouth.
"I'll babysit William every Friday night for a month so that you
can sleep in on Saturdays," she says.
"A whole month? You've got yourself a deal," I agree with a
smile.
* * * * * * * * * *
The party was that weekend. So by Saturday morning, I was about
ready to back out again. I haven't had too many run ins with
Kersh since Mulder's been gone. But seeing him will only remind
me of why I'm raising my son without his father. I don't know if
I can handle it. The knock at the door tells me that it's too late
to back out now. I walk across the living room to open it.
"Hi Dana," Monica says cheerfully. She steps into the apartment
while I go get William's bottles from the refrigerator to pack in
his back. When I return, she has the baby and is showing him off
to one of the most gorgeous men I think I've ever had the pleasure
of laying my eyes on.
"Hello," I say, tossing her a quizzical glare. Apparently she
learned a thing or two about my 'looks' from Mulder, because she
answers the question before I can even ask it.
"This is Jerrod. A new friend," she explains, giving me a glare
of her own in return. A look that said, 'I'll tell you all about
him later.' From the blush on both their cheeks, I could tell
that it was going to be some story.
"It's nice to meet you, Jerrod," I say, offering my hand to him.
"I'm Dana. And this is William."
"Nice to meet you too, Dana," he says with a silky, smooth voice
to match his creamy milk chocolate complexion and deep dark
chocolate eyes.
"Jerrod, can you take the stroller and baby bag to the car?"
Monica asks sweetly. "Dana and I will be down in a second." He
flashes one last heart melting grin before obeying her every
command.
"Wow," I gasp after leaves. "That's some guy you found, Monica.
He's very . . . "
"I think hot is the word you're looking for," she giggles. I
laugh with her, nodding enthusiastically.
"I don't think I've ever literally drooled over a guy before," I
gush.
"Hey, Mulder's no slouch," Monica reminds me.
"Oh, I know," I smile, blushing at how attractive I've always
found him. "He definitely lives up to his name."
"No kidding!" she agrees whole heartedly. A little *too* whole
heartedly.
"Monica! You better keep your hands on your own man and leave
mine alone," I warn her playfully.
"Yeah, and you keep your hands off of mine. Don't make me have to
tell Mulder on you." We fall into another fit of giggles before I
grab William's seat and we walk out the door.
* * * * * * * * * *
The party actually wasn't too bad. Most of the agents invited
were curious about William, but they didn't ask anything rude or
make any comments about Mulder. I had long ago stopped caring
what others said, but I was still a little reluctant about putting
myself into certain situations where I would possibly have to deal
with that. After a while, I find a nice quiet spot for ourselves
to relax a bit and just watch the crowd. But William wasn't
having any of that. He starts squiriming around in the stroller,
gearing up for what I've come to recognize as his 'change me' cry.
"What's the matter, Baby Boy?" I ask in a ridiculously high
squeaky voice that seems to always calm him. I stick my finger
inside his diaper and confirm my suspicions that he was wet. "You
need a new diaper? Is that what it is, my love?" I turn around
quickly when I hear someone chuckle behind me. It turns out to be
the deputy director's wife.
"I'm sorry," she says, still laughing. "You just don't hear many
FBI agents using that tone of voice."
"He seems to like it," I smile tightly, not sure how to act around
this woman. "Mrs. Kersh, do you have somewhere I can change him?"
"Of course, Dear," she says kindly. "I'll show you." She bends
down to get William's bag for me and I follow her into the house.
"You can leave the stroller right here. I have a changing area
set up upstairs."
I nod and lift William from the stroller and follow her up the
stairs.
"You have a lovely home, Mrs. Kersh," I tell her, trying to break
the silence. She had a gentle smile, but I was still a little
suspicious considering who her husband was.
"Thank you, Agent Scully."
I raise an eyebrow at her.
"You know who I am?" I ask her, feeling myself unconsciously hold
William tighter. He lets out a small cry of protest and I loosen
up on my grasp of him a little. "How do you know who I am? I
didn't realize I was one of your husband's favorite agents." We
stop in front of a room and she opens the door, ushering me
inside.
"Here," she says, pulling William from me. "Why don't I take
him."
I almost resist, but I hear her soft, soothing words towards
William and change my mind. She lays him on the changing table
that's been set up and begins to unbutton his pants.
"Hand me the wipes," she orders gently. She quickly and
proficiently changes the diaper, lifting the happy and dry baby
into her arms when she's done. She pulls him close to her chest
and takes a whiff of his baby fresh hair. "You are so precious,"
she coos. "I can see why your daddy had such a hard time leaving
you."
I gasp and she looks up to meet my eyes.
"How do you know us?" I ask her again. My voice was shaking, like
I was about to cry, but I didn't care.
"He looks so much like Fox," she tells me, seemingly ignoring my
questions and tears. She gives him a kiss on the forehead before
placing him back into my arms.
"How do you know Mulder?" I'm getting the feeling that I'm
wasting my breath with these questions. She just stares at me,
not saying anything. And not answering what I've been asking for
the past few minutes.
"He'll be back," she finally says. "He loves you. And he loves
William."
"How do you know that?"
"When he left, he came here. Alvin and I hid him for two days
before it was safe enough for him to leave town," she explains.
"What?" is all I can manage to gasp.
"He cried and cried that first day he was here. He sounded like a
man who's heart just got ripped out. In a way, I guess it had."
My mouth opens and closes a few times, wordless sounds seeping
from between my lips.
"Agent Scully, I know what you must think about my husband. He's
tough. He has to be. But he doesn't mean Fox any harm. He was
only trying to help him. To help all three of you."
"Really? He never wanted to help us before. Why now?" I say in a
mean, sarcastic tone that I instantly regret. The look on her
face turns sad, haunted even. I feel bad for what I said and try
to apologize. "Look, I'm sorry . . ."
"No," she interrupts me. "I understand. Alvin's told me about
the . . . difficulties he's had getting along with you and your
supporters. But believe me when I say that his intentions where
your family is concerned are honorable."
I nod, not really sure I believe her. I mean I believe that *she*
believes what she's saying, that she believes in her husband. But
I don't know if I'll ever be able to. That theory very quickly
gets tested when the deputy director himself comes walking into
the room.
"Agent Scully," he nods in my direction. "I'm glad you were able
to make it." He looks at me and can see the anger and confusion
flashing in my eyes. He looks next to his wife and can see the
sadness in hers. "What's going on in here?"
Right then, my little angel decides he no longer wanted to be left
out of the conversation. He starts flailing his arms and babbling
incessantly, wondering in his little baby brain why he wasn't the
center of attention. We all chuckle lightly at him.
"What was that, Little Guy? You getting tired of being left out?"
Kersh says, surprising me with his gentle tone. He reaches out
for William, glancing up at me for permission. "May I?"
"If he'll go to you," I tell him, with a nonchalant shrug trying
to play it cool on the outside. But inside, my heart was pounding
and I began to visually scan the room for danger.
But to my surprise, William eagerly reaches towards the man,
smiling brightly at him. To my even bigger surprise, Deputy
Director Kersh smiles back and starts, and I kid you not, to coo
at my son. He looks back at me with a smile that I can only
describe as grateful before imitating his wife's earlier actions.
He hugs William to his chest and takes a deep breath, enjoying his
fresh baby scent.
"How are the two of you doing? Really?" Kersh asks me, the
tenderness still evident in his voice.
"We're fine, Sir," I answer him, still confused by this completely
different Alvin Kersh than the one I'm used to seeing and promptly
running from.
"Agent Mulder warned me you'd say that," he grins. He gives
William one more hug before handing him back to me. "Honestly,
how are you?"
"We miss him, Sir. Very much. We want him home," I tell him, not
really sure why I'm being so forthcoming with him. He just nods
his head, as if he totally understands what I'm saying.
"Agent Scully, I know you don't have any reason to trust me or to
believe me, but if there was any other way . . . I just don't
think a man should be separated from his son. Ever." He looks to
his wife and his face soon reflects the sad, haunted image she
wore a few minutes ago. He grabs her hand and squeezes it for
quick second, making a vital connection that seems to have kept
them going all of these years.
"Well ladies, I think I'm heading back to my party now," he
announces, suddenly breaking the oppressing silence of the room
that even William seemed to respect. He turns to leave and we
watch him go. I'm too much in shock to say anything.
"We should be going back, too," I hear Mrs. Kersh say, although I
think it takes a few minutes for the words to make any sense in my
brain.
"Mrs. Kersh," I say, stopping her from walking out the door. I
don't want to ask, but I have to know. "I don't mean to be nosy,
but do you and the Deputy Director have any . . . " But then I
see that lost look in her eyes again, and I figure I'm better off
not knowing. "Nevermind. It's really none of my business."
"We called him AJ. Alvin Jr.," she says, her voice hoarse with
the unshed tears from years passed. He was just three when he
died. He was the light of my husband's light. That light died
with the baby. I didn't think I'd ever see that light again. But
I did. Just now when he was holding William." A small smile
spreads across her face.
"I'm sorry." I know it sounds lame, but that's all I can think to
say.
"Now you know why he's doing this. So that one day, you and Agent
Mulder will hopefully have more than three years to enjoy with
your son."
I smile at her and nod. Because I did understand. And for the
first time ever, I was grateful for Deputy Director Kersh.
* * * * * * * * * *
I convince Monica and Jerrod to leave well before the end of the
party. William was getting cranky and ready for a nap in his own
crib. They didn't seem to mind too much, though. I think they
had plans on a more private soiree anyway. On the way out, see
Kersh and his wife chatting with some other guests. I stop by
there on the way to the car.
"Sir, I just wanted to thank you for inviting William and I. We
had a really nice time," I say honestly. "In fact, I think
William would love to come back and visit. He seems to have made
a few new friends." William adds his input and lets out a happy
squeal, reaching a chubby hand out to the Deputy Director. "I may
have just found another babysitter, if you think you two are up
for it."
"Anytime, Agent Scully," Kersh smiles. "Maybe I'll be able to
keep *this* Mulder under control."
"Don't count on that, Sir," I say with a laugh. "He's going to be
just like his daddy."
I hug my sweet baby and kiss his plump cheek before saying our
last good-byes. This day hasn't turned out like anything I
expected. It's nice to know there are people on my side. I never
would have expected Deputy Director Kersh to be one of those
people. But I'm glad I was proved wrong.
The End.
Feedback please!!!
Thanks :-)