*Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, Jessica Simpson, and Mandy Moore are all sitting in Britney's living room. Willa Ford is photographing everything. Some quiet yet dramatic movie begins playing.*
Britney: They say late at night, in the Black Woods, you can hear a sweet love song being sung by a woman who can sing incredibly high notes. Notes so high they break glass. She seduces everyone that comes into the Black Woods, and they disappear, never to be seen again. We are going to try to find the Blair Diva, in....
THE BLAIR DIVA PROJECT
Announcer: Coming To Theaters This Summer. Britney Spears, Mandy Moore, Jessica Simpson, Willa Ford, and Christina Aguilera all star in....THE BLAIR DIVA PROJECT!
*Cuts to shot of the girls in the woods, except this time, Jessica's shooting it.*
Britney: Oh my God. Did you hear that?
Christina: *Farts* Oh, sorry, that shit we ate last night always gives me gas.
Britney: No, you ditzy twat! I mean did you hear that....singing?
Mandy: Maybe it's the....Blair Diva!
Announcer: There is no escape in the Black Woods from the Blair Diva
*Singing gets louder*
Willa: Oh Britney! Christina! Jessica! Mandy! I'm scared!
Britney: I think she's in this shack! *Points to a shack that looks like it was once a mansion.*
Christina: Let's go in!
Announcer: This summer, see Britney Spears....
Britney: I can hear her! She's upstairs!
Announcer: ....Christina Aguilera....
Christina: She sounds way too familiar.
Announcer: ....Willa Ford....
Willa: It sounds like....
Announcer: ....Jessica Simpson....
Jessica: I know who it is!!!!
Announcer: ....Mandy Moore....
*All get into the room and see Mariah Carey singing the high notes.*
Mandy: Mariah?
All: MARIAH CAREY?
Mariah: You were expecting the Blair Witch?
Announcer: ....and Special Appearance by Mariah Carey.....it's the Blair Diva Project. Coming To Theaters This Summer.
Britney: They say late at night, in the Black Woods, you can hear a sweet love song being sung by a woman who can sing incredibly high notes. Notes so high they break glass. She seduces everyone that comes into the Black Woods, and they disappear, never to be seen again. We are going to try to find the Blair Diva, in....
THE BLAIR DIVA PROJECT
Announcer: Coming To Theaters This Summer. Britney Spears, Mandy Moore, Jessica Simpson, Willa Ford, and Christina Aguilera all star in....THE BLAIR DIVA PROJECT!
*Cuts to shot of the girls in the woods, except this time, Jessica's shooting it.*
Britney: Oh my God. Did you hear that?
Christina: *Farts* Oh, sorry, that shit we ate last night always gives me gas.
Britney: No, you ditzy twat! I mean did you hear that....singing?
Mandy: Maybe it's the....Blair Diva!
Announcer: There is no escape in the Black Woods from the Blair Diva
*Singing gets louder*
Willa: Oh Britney! Christina! Jessica! Mandy! I'm scared!
Britney: I think she's in this shack! *Points to a shack that looks like it was once a mansion.*
Christina: Let's go in!
Announcer: This summer, see Britney Spears....
Britney: I can hear her! She's upstairs!
Announcer: ....Christina Aguilera....
Christina: She sounds way too familiar.
Announcer: ....Willa Ford....
Willa: It sounds like....
Announcer: ....Jessica Simpson....
Jessica: I know who it is!!!!
Announcer: ....Mandy Moore....
*All get into the room and see Mariah Carey singing the high notes.*
Mandy: Mariah?
All: MARIAH CAREY?
Mariah: You were expecting the Blair Witch?
Announcer: ....and Special Appearance by Mariah Carey.....it's the Blair Diva Project. Coming To Theaters This Summer.