Pain is Bitter
Chapter Two [Suicidal]
AN Ok, here's the 5 pages the computer deleted last night. I'm still pissed. Damn this piece of shit crappy computer! It was really hard to write and it took me so long. The computer room was so cold my fingers were numb, but I was like… have to finish the chapter… and then, just as I finish the 6th page… POOF! Gone with the wind. Ah well, here it is AGAIN.
Hermione awoke cosseted in comforting warmth. Sighing, and turned over in her bed, coming face to face with … DRACO MALFOY…
What the hell? What was Malfoy doing in her bed?
They were both fully clothed in their pajamas, she noted with relief. Still, there was this aching pain in her chest, like something had happened, she just couldn't grasp it…something horrible.
Draco looked so young and innocent when he was sleeping, too bad he was a malicious jerk when he was awake. Malicious, that triggered it. He wanted all Mudbloods dead…it hit her like a bludger.
What had happened, what he had said.
Hermione leapt out of bed, ran to the bathroom and hurled.
She wiped her mouth ruefully, then leaned against the wall of the bathroom, and sank into a sitting position.
Mom- dead. Dad and Stephen- alone. They can't take care of themselves. Summer holidays started in two weeks, they could last that long.
Draco Malfoy- cruel heartless bastard. They had had a semi- quasi- sorta almost maybe friendship, but that had vanished the minute that he had said those words, those little words that had been like little stabs in her heart. Hermione Granger had always been convinced that words held no power unless you gave it to them, but maybe she was wrong.
Harry, Ron, Ginny and Dumbledore- will help. Everybody else- can go to hell. So, she had everybody clinically sorted into little stacks in her brain. Now she just had to go on living her little life in this little world that was a little better every time a little muggle died.
Damn Draco Malfoy.
Hermione burst into tears. Why am I crying? Didn't I cry enough last night? She thought dully as she let the comfortingly painful sobs rack her body, taking short, deep, gasping breaths. Physical pain numbs emotional pain. How right was whoever said that. And how horrible that they were right, thought Hermione as she balled her body up tighter, making it hard for her to breathe.
Horrible, her brain repeated as she grabbed the nearest razor (which was Draco's) and slashed her arm brutally with it. She wanted to feel it, see it, taste it. The pain. To make sure it was real.
Maybe she was imagining it, or dreaming it.
Or maybe it would all go away if she could just make it more real, more visible.
This was the most horrible moment of Hermione Granger's life, the moment where she made the choice to hurt herself. She wanted scars, to remember this, 'I'll never forget the day I tried to kill myself…' and was successful, she thought viciously as she sliced at her wrist. It was good to feel it.
That pain, she gloried in it, it was real, she wasn't going crazy, it was there, every time that razor bit into her flesh, every time a salty tear slipped into a wound and made it sting like hell. And best of all, she MADE it real, she had the power.
She laughed a little, because Draco Malfoy was going to get the surprise of a lifetime, finding Hermione Granger dead in his bathroom and HIS razor the suicide weapon. A dream come true. At least the bastard can get some satisfaction out of this she thought, laughing again.
Blood was going everywhere, everywhere. Puddles of it, soaking her, the bathroom, everything.
Who would've thought she had so much blood? Hermione thought crazily before she fainted.
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Draco awoke in a warm bed, feeling rested and bright. Now I'm awake, he thought, I can think it all through.
Draco got a brilliant idea. He would sneak out and pretend nothing had ever happened! He sighed happily. Sometimes I'm so smart I kill myself he thought.
He turned over, expecting to see Hermione, but all he saw was the cold indentation her body had made on the bed the night before. Shit!
Draco sat up in the bed and looked around. Hermione was nowhere to be seen. Great. Lost my chance to ignore her! He heard a crazy little giggle and looked around. The bathroom. He could see a faint light coming from under the door. Still have a chance to redeem myself then.
He pulled the covers off, swung his legs over the side of the bed and gingerly placed his feet on the chilled floor. There was a dull thud and he shivered. Just her make- up bag, fool.
He approached the bathroom and knocked on the door.
"Mudblood? Muggle Love Child? Frizzball?" He called, snickering, expecting to hear a biting retort. He heard none.
"GRANGER, Open up!" He yelled, angry now.
Then he looked down.
And noticed the edge of a red puddle that was seeping under the door.
"Shit! Hermione?" he said through the door anxiously. " Hermione? Hermione?" He said again, his voice dwindling as horrible images flashed through his head.
He pushed open the door, it wasn't locked. It had only opened a little way when it hit something solid.
Draco pushed, and it continued inwards, leaving behind it a smudge of blood. It opened enough for Draco to slip in. He stepped over the growing lake of blood and looked in.
Hermione Granger lay sprawled on the floor, a strangely peaceful smile on her pale lips.
"Hermione?" Draco spluttered, looking horrified. He ran across the bathroom, not caring that his feet were getting covered in blood, the blood of a muggle born, no less.
He knelt on all fours beside Hermione, shaking her shoulders urgently. "Her- Hermione? Hermione!"
He said, watching in disbelief as her head lolled uselessly. She was so damn cold, what was he going to do… the thought hit Draco like a bucket of cold water. Wake up, she needs Pomfrey you idiot!
Draco picked Hermione up in his arms, slipping and sliding in the blood as he climbed out of the portrait hole and ran towards the infirmary. He was stumbling and weaving like a drunk when he finally reached the double doors that lead to the hospital wing.
Snape came out at the moment he was trying to get in, and Draco slammed full into him.
"What the…? Excuse me, but where do you think you're going in such a hurry?" Said Snape as he looked up from his papers. "I shall have to take… points…"
He faltered at the sight of the two blood covered students in front of him but then he regained his composure, reaching out to take Hermione from Draco's arms. The boy was in shock, he realized as Draco shook his head, jerking Hermione's body away from him and repeating,
"No. Hermione, have to get her to Madam Pomfrey, now, fast, Madam Pomfrey, Hermione's dying, MOVE!" as he tried to get past Snape.
Snape stood aside and Draco tumbled into the room, dropping Hermione on the nearest bed and leaning over her.
She opened her eyes briefly and said in a choked voice,
"Got what you wanted Malfoy, one more down," but then her head slumped down again, a sick little smile on her face. Draco shook his head violently,
"No! No I didn't want that, don't want that Hermione! Please Hermione! No… no I didn't…" he said weakly, before he did something he had never thought he would do, he passed out cold on the floor.
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Dumbledore, Snape, McGonagall, Pomfrey, Harry, Ron and Ginny stood at the end of Draco and Hermione's respective beds, talking in hushed voices.
"What happened?" Harry asked, looking worriedly at Hermione.
Dumbledore shook his gray head; a tear making it's way down his worn cheek.
"Last night we told Ms. Granger that her mother had been murdered. She must have… she attempted suicide Harry."
Harry looked down.
He, Snape and Pomfrey were the only ones in the group not crying, though all three of them, including Snape, looked near it.
Ginny looked up, suddenly angry.
"What do you mean Hermione committed suicide? She would never do that, no matter what happened! She's strong. Malfoy has had it in for all four of us for years, she was grief-stricken and not thinking straight, she couldn't defend herself, and look what he did to her!" She cried, gesturing to Hermione.
McGonagall shook her head firmly.
"Listen Ginny, we'd all like to believe that Hermione was too strong, we'd all like to pin this on Draco. But, he ran in here crying, HYSTERICAL, covered in blood, carrying Hermione. That's not typical murderer behavior." She said, always the voice of reason, even when tears were pouring down her face and one of her most beloved students was in critical condition.
"But if you hadn't just left her… you should have got us! You should have brought us to her! She needed us; we could've helped her… It's all your FAULT!" Ginny practically spat at McGonagall and Dumbledore, showing her Weasley temperament.
McGonagall ran out the door. With a jerk of his head, Dumbledore dismissed Snape, who ran after McGonagall.
Pomfrey looked annoyed.
"You're all overwrought. Ginny, Harry, please leave, and on your way out, take some Pepperup Potion. Maybe you could bring some to Minerva?" She said, her eyes soft though her mouth was set in a stern line.
Harry and Ginny nodded miserably, and walked out the doors, still swinging from Snape's anxious departure.
Ron sat down on the floor next to Hermione's bed; taking her hand and laying his head down to go to sleep.
Dumbledore and Pomfrey watched him sadly for a moment, then sat down in front of the fire to watch the flames as they flickered and died.
Four hours later, after the fire had been re-lit over and over and God- knows- how-many mugs of Pepperup had been drunk, Dumbledore said,
"Why hasn't Draco woken?"
"Oh he woke up hours ago, but he was still hysterical, absolutely traumatized, wouldn't calm down. I couldn't restrain him. Had to give him a sleeping draught. Those kids, they're going to need therapy." Pomfrey said, sounding like a cynical New Yorker.
Dumbledore finally worked up his courage and asked,
"Poppy, what are her chances?"
Madam Pomfrey looked up from her mug, looking grim.
"Not good Albus, not very good. Once she survives this night, she has more of a chance, but she lost so much blood…"
Dumbledore simply nodded and went back to staring into the swirling liquid in his mug.
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Ron woke feeling stiff; he stood from his position on the floor and stretched.
The early morning sun poured into the infirmary and filled the room with almost surreal white light. Light brought cheer, Ron thought wryly. No cheer in this room. The muffled laughter of Hogwarts students on their way down to breakfast reached his ears and he could hear McGonagall telling someone off, although not with her usual vigor. Dumbledore was gone, probably had important Light-Side business.
He walked over to Draco's bed, looking down at his sleeping enemy. His enemy who had saved Hermione's life. The words 'enemy' and 'hate' are used to freely these days, Ron reflected. Maybe there was a heart beating underneath that cruel sneer after all.
He turned back to Hermione; she looked so scary, with that strange smile still plastered on her white face, dark circles around her eyes and her cheeks sunken.
He felt a gentle tap on his shoulder, and turned to look down at Madam Pomfrey, who had a sympathetic expression on her face. Ron Weasley was Hermione's best friend of the Fab Four, although they were all very close, and it would be hard on him if she…passed away.
"Listen Ron, I know how much you love Hermione, but for know, you should just go on with your classes as usual."
Ron started to protest but she held up a hand and continued, "Hermione will need you, and the second she wakes up, I'll have you called. Please Ron, right now I need the space to work and you need the space to think and just… get over this." She said apologetically.
Ron nodded, a painful expression on his face, and walked to the door, Madam Pomfrey watching him all the way, finally allowing her tears to flow unchecked over her face.
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The second Ron walked in the doors of the Great Hall, Ginny and Harry grabbed him and pulled him over to the shadows.
"How is Hermione?" Ginny asked, looking up at him with wide and hopeful eyes.
Ron swallowed. "She's… not good. She looks so…near death, so peaceful. It's scary." He said, fighting back tears.
Ginny looked crushed.
"But Pomfrey said that now she's survived the night, she has a good chance, so maybe…" Ron trailed off, wanting to cheer her up but not give false hope.
Ginny nodded and smiled bravely.
"Well, everybody has been asking about her, what should that we say?" She asked.
"Just that Hermione had a little accident…" Said Harry glumly.
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1 One Week Later
Draco woke in a hard, cold bed, only a clinical white sheet covering him. He was in plain white pajamas that he didn't recognize and he felt like he had run a marathon twice and then been pounded on the head with an over- sized hammer as congratulations.
He groaned and looked around.
Everything seemed wrong. Maybe he was in some alternate world…? He tried to rub his eyes but couldn't, there was something blocking his hands… his glasses! Draco groaned again. 'You nitwit!' he thought to himself.
He pulled off his glasses and lay them on what he thought was a bedside table; he was still a little groggy. And sluggish, and stiff, and sore, and achy his mind complained.
Someone was pushing a glass of water into his hand and propping him up on fluffy pillows. Madam Pomfrey, he recognized. He took a delicate sip of the water and looked up at her with puppy-dog eyes, saying,
"Madam Pomfrey, why am I here?" Pomfrey just peered down at him, trying to gauge whether he was being sarcastic or not.
She just shook her head sadly and gestured to the bed next to him, then left him with his privacy.
Draco looked at the next bed curiously.
A girl, cinnamon hair… familiar.
He furrowed his brow, making his head hurt even more. He stood shakily, and leant over the girl, trying to see her face…
"Granger?!" He said surprised, what could she be doing… then he remembered.
He dropped his glass with a smash, water flying over him as he stumbled backwards, stunned. Harry, Ron and Ginny, who were sitting in the waiting room studying, ran in.
Madam Pomfrey took one look at him, and saw he was deathly pale and sputtering. She grabbed a vial of purple liquid, ran over to Draco, and tried to force him to sit down. Harry and Ron sprinted over to the bed and helped her. They forced his mouth open, he was struggling with every inch of his strength, and poured the liquid down his throat. He fought it valiantly before he swallowed, grimacing.
"I don't want to go to sleep again!" He managed to say in a strangled voice before he dropped into a deep and dreamless sleep.
Harry, Ron and Ginny all looked at Madam Pomfrey questioningly.
"What was that for?" asked Ron.
"He gets hysterical every time he wakes up, he's too much to handle. I don't know when he'll calm down enough to stay awake."
"What do you mean hysterical?" asked Harry curiously.
Pomfrey sighed.
"I mean totally hysterical. He's fine until he sees Hermione, then he goes crazy. Crying, lashing out at anyone who goes near him, shaking Hermione, and he won't let anyone near her. Last time we had to get Snape, Hagrid and Filch to hold him down and Dumbledore to force-feed him, because he won't eat otherwise."
The three friends looked at each other in shock. They had wondered why Draco was still in the hospital wing, but had figured that he had some unrelated injury. Guess not.
TBC
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AN I've never written anything like the bathroom scene, tell me if it sucked! I don't really know what it would be like to want to kill yourself, so I can only imagine what the motives would be. If you have any suggestions, tell me, I'm open. Also, in this story, they drink watered down Pepperup potion to calm themselves. EEE, don't slaughter me! And, I have more to say! Can you believe that! I wrote this chapter with one hand because I was eating a ham, feta and FLAMER sandwich for lunch. Yummy! And naturally, drinking much Orange Juice, mmm.
Thanks to Reviewers:
Damia- rude is NOT the word. That was absolutely horrid of Draco, but it was necessary to the story. I wanted to give Hermione more reason for suicide, and I needed more conflict in their relationship (at the beginning of the first chapter they were fairly chummy, remember. OK, not chummy, but tolerant, at least!). Don't worry, he'll fix it. I hope.
Lena- Thank-you kindly dahling!
BlazingUnknown- oh yes, very cold. I hope he begged to your liking. Unfortunately, I've gotta old-fashioned mind, and never give the females in my stories any physical power. It's all about the mind games and the emotions, baby.
Lyra- yes, the whole bastard/sweet thing. Split personality maybe?
Junsui Chikyuu- I would have had 6 pages for you but this stupid goddamn frikin' hellhole sugarmuffin godfather jesusmaryandjoseph stupid cruddy computer screwed everything up. Sorry for the swearfest but I'm sooooooo angry right now. More tomorrow.
Christina- I will. And every second word, I'll resave what I'm writing honey. *kicks computer*
coolkid189- I joined your group. Glad you liked the story.
Lyra- that is the highest compliment. Thank you so much.
Horny Girl- *ahem* well, unfortunately I don't do graphic sex scenes *blushes at mere thought* you'll have to look for them somewhere else, the most I do is implications. *Heheh* SORRY! It's just that… oh well.
allee kat- I hope this was updated when you got home from school!
StarJade- creepy, yes. Will it get creepier? Definitely.
Sucker For Romance- Draco IS ashamed of himself, believe you me! He's actually hysterical!
Chapter Two [Suicidal]
AN Ok, here's the 5 pages the computer deleted last night. I'm still pissed. Damn this piece of shit crappy computer! It was really hard to write and it took me so long. The computer room was so cold my fingers were numb, but I was like… have to finish the chapter… and then, just as I finish the 6th page… POOF! Gone with the wind. Ah well, here it is AGAIN.
Hermione awoke cosseted in comforting warmth. Sighing, and turned over in her bed, coming face to face with … DRACO MALFOY…
What the hell? What was Malfoy doing in her bed?
They were both fully clothed in their pajamas, she noted with relief. Still, there was this aching pain in her chest, like something had happened, she just couldn't grasp it…something horrible.
Draco looked so young and innocent when he was sleeping, too bad he was a malicious jerk when he was awake. Malicious, that triggered it. He wanted all Mudbloods dead…it hit her like a bludger.
What had happened, what he had said.
Hermione leapt out of bed, ran to the bathroom and hurled.
She wiped her mouth ruefully, then leaned against the wall of the bathroom, and sank into a sitting position.
Mom- dead. Dad and Stephen- alone. They can't take care of themselves. Summer holidays started in two weeks, they could last that long.
Draco Malfoy- cruel heartless bastard. They had had a semi- quasi- sorta almost maybe friendship, but that had vanished the minute that he had said those words, those little words that had been like little stabs in her heart. Hermione Granger had always been convinced that words held no power unless you gave it to them, but maybe she was wrong.
Harry, Ron, Ginny and Dumbledore- will help. Everybody else- can go to hell. So, she had everybody clinically sorted into little stacks in her brain. Now she just had to go on living her little life in this little world that was a little better every time a little muggle died.
Damn Draco Malfoy.
Hermione burst into tears. Why am I crying? Didn't I cry enough last night? She thought dully as she let the comfortingly painful sobs rack her body, taking short, deep, gasping breaths. Physical pain numbs emotional pain. How right was whoever said that. And how horrible that they were right, thought Hermione as she balled her body up tighter, making it hard for her to breathe.
Horrible, her brain repeated as she grabbed the nearest razor (which was Draco's) and slashed her arm brutally with it. She wanted to feel it, see it, taste it. The pain. To make sure it was real.
Maybe she was imagining it, or dreaming it.
Or maybe it would all go away if she could just make it more real, more visible.
This was the most horrible moment of Hermione Granger's life, the moment where she made the choice to hurt herself. She wanted scars, to remember this, 'I'll never forget the day I tried to kill myself…' and was successful, she thought viciously as she sliced at her wrist. It was good to feel it.
That pain, she gloried in it, it was real, she wasn't going crazy, it was there, every time that razor bit into her flesh, every time a salty tear slipped into a wound and made it sting like hell. And best of all, she MADE it real, she had the power.
She laughed a little, because Draco Malfoy was going to get the surprise of a lifetime, finding Hermione Granger dead in his bathroom and HIS razor the suicide weapon. A dream come true. At least the bastard can get some satisfaction out of this she thought, laughing again.
Blood was going everywhere, everywhere. Puddles of it, soaking her, the bathroom, everything.
Who would've thought she had so much blood? Hermione thought crazily before she fainted.
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Draco awoke in a warm bed, feeling rested and bright. Now I'm awake, he thought, I can think it all through.
Draco got a brilliant idea. He would sneak out and pretend nothing had ever happened! He sighed happily. Sometimes I'm so smart I kill myself he thought.
He turned over, expecting to see Hermione, but all he saw was the cold indentation her body had made on the bed the night before. Shit!
Draco sat up in the bed and looked around. Hermione was nowhere to be seen. Great. Lost my chance to ignore her! He heard a crazy little giggle and looked around. The bathroom. He could see a faint light coming from under the door. Still have a chance to redeem myself then.
He pulled the covers off, swung his legs over the side of the bed and gingerly placed his feet on the chilled floor. There was a dull thud and he shivered. Just her make- up bag, fool.
He approached the bathroom and knocked on the door.
"Mudblood? Muggle Love Child? Frizzball?" He called, snickering, expecting to hear a biting retort. He heard none.
"GRANGER, Open up!" He yelled, angry now.
Then he looked down.
And noticed the edge of a red puddle that was seeping under the door.
"Shit! Hermione?" he said through the door anxiously. " Hermione? Hermione?" He said again, his voice dwindling as horrible images flashed through his head.
He pushed open the door, it wasn't locked. It had only opened a little way when it hit something solid.
Draco pushed, and it continued inwards, leaving behind it a smudge of blood. It opened enough for Draco to slip in. He stepped over the growing lake of blood and looked in.
Hermione Granger lay sprawled on the floor, a strangely peaceful smile on her pale lips.
"Hermione?" Draco spluttered, looking horrified. He ran across the bathroom, not caring that his feet were getting covered in blood, the blood of a muggle born, no less.
He knelt on all fours beside Hermione, shaking her shoulders urgently. "Her- Hermione? Hermione!"
He said, watching in disbelief as her head lolled uselessly. She was so damn cold, what was he going to do… the thought hit Draco like a bucket of cold water. Wake up, she needs Pomfrey you idiot!
Draco picked Hermione up in his arms, slipping and sliding in the blood as he climbed out of the portrait hole and ran towards the infirmary. He was stumbling and weaving like a drunk when he finally reached the double doors that lead to the hospital wing.
Snape came out at the moment he was trying to get in, and Draco slammed full into him.
"What the…? Excuse me, but where do you think you're going in such a hurry?" Said Snape as he looked up from his papers. "I shall have to take… points…"
He faltered at the sight of the two blood covered students in front of him but then he regained his composure, reaching out to take Hermione from Draco's arms. The boy was in shock, he realized as Draco shook his head, jerking Hermione's body away from him and repeating,
"No. Hermione, have to get her to Madam Pomfrey, now, fast, Madam Pomfrey, Hermione's dying, MOVE!" as he tried to get past Snape.
Snape stood aside and Draco tumbled into the room, dropping Hermione on the nearest bed and leaning over her.
She opened her eyes briefly and said in a choked voice,
"Got what you wanted Malfoy, one more down," but then her head slumped down again, a sick little smile on her face. Draco shook his head violently,
"No! No I didn't want that, don't want that Hermione! Please Hermione! No… no I didn't…" he said weakly, before he did something he had never thought he would do, he passed out cold on the floor.
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Dumbledore, Snape, McGonagall, Pomfrey, Harry, Ron and Ginny stood at the end of Draco and Hermione's respective beds, talking in hushed voices.
"What happened?" Harry asked, looking worriedly at Hermione.
Dumbledore shook his gray head; a tear making it's way down his worn cheek.
"Last night we told Ms. Granger that her mother had been murdered. She must have… she attempted suicide Harry."
Harry looked down.
He, Snape and Pomfrey were the only ones in the group not crying, though all three of them, including Snape, looked near it.
Ginny looked up, suddenly angry.
"What do you mean Hermione committed suicide? She would never do that, no matter what happened! She's strong. Malfoy has had it in for all four of us for years, she was grief-stricken and not thinking straight, she couldn't defend herself, and look what he did to her!" She cried, gesturing to Hermione.
McGonagall shook her head firmly.
"Listen Ginny, we'd all like to believe that Hermione was too strong, we'd all like to pin this on Draco. But, he ran in here crying, HYSTERICAL, covered in blood, carrying Hermione. That's not typical murderer behavior." She said, always the voice of reason, even when tears were pouring down her face and one of her most beloved students was in critical condition.
"But if you hadn't just left her… you should have got us! You should have brought us to her! She needed us; we could've helped her… It's all your FAULT!" Ginny practically spat at McGonagall and Dumbledore, showing her Weasley temperament.
McGonagall ran out the door. With a jerk of his head, Dumbledore dismissed Snape, who ran after McGonagall.
Pomfrey looked annoyed.
"You're all overwrought. Ginny, Harry, please leave, and on your way out, take some Pepperup Potion. Maybe you could bring some to Minerva?" She said, her eyes soft though her mouth was set in a stern line.
Harry and Ginny nodded miserably, and walked out the doors, still swinging from Snape's anxious departure.
Ron sat down on the floor next to Hermione's bed; taking her hand and laying his head down to go to sleep.
Dumbledore and Pomfrey watched him sadly for a moment, then sat down in front of the fire to watch the flames as they flickered and died.
Four hours later, after the fire had been re-lit over and over and God- knows- how-many mugs of Pepperup had been drunk, Dumbledore said,
"Why hasn't Draco woken?"
"Oh he woke up hours ago, but he was still hysterical, absolutely traumatized, wouldn't calm down. I couldn't restrain him. Had to give him a sleeping draught. Those kids, they're going to need therapy." Pomfrey said, sounding like a cynical New Yorker.
Dumbledore finally worked up his courage and asked,
"Poppy, what are her chances?"
Madam Pomfrey looked up from her mug, looking grim.
"Not good Albus, not very good. Once she survives this night, she has more of a chance, but she lost so much blood…"
Dumbledore simply nodded and went back to staring into the swirling liquid in his mug.
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Ron woke feeling stiff; he stood from his position on the floor and stretched.
The early morning sun poured into the infirmary and filled the room with almost surreal white light. Light brought cheer, Ron thought wryly. No cheer in this room. The muffled laughter of Hogwarts students on their way down to breakfast reached his ears and he could hear McGonagall telling someone off, although not with her usual vigor. Dumbledore was gone, probably had important Light-Side business.
He walked over to Draco's bed, looking down at his sleeping enemy. His enemy who had saved Hermione's life. The words 'enemy' and 'hate' are used to freely these days, Ron reflected. Maybe there was a heart beating underneath that cruel sneer after all.
He turned back to Hermione; she looked so scary, with that strange smile still plastered on her white face, dark circles around her eyes and her cheeks sunken.
He felt a gentle tap on his shoulder, and turned to look down at Madam Pomfrey, who had a sympathetic expression on her face. Ron Weasley was Hermione's best friend of the Fab Four, although they were all very close, and it would be hard on him if she…passed away.
"Listen Ron, I know how much you love Hermione, but for know, you should just go on with your classes as usual."
Ron started to protest but she held up a hand and continued, "Hermione will need you, and the second she wakes up, I'll have you called. Please Ron, right now I need the space to work and you need the space to think and just… get over this." She said apologetically.
Ron nodded, a painful expression on his face, and walked to the door, Madam Pomfrey watching him all the way, finally allowing her tears to flow unchecked over her face.
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The second Ron walked in the doors of the Great Hall, Ginny and Harry grabbed him and pulled him over to the shadows.
"How is Hermione?" Ginny asked, looking up at him with wide and hopeful eyes.
Ron swallowed. "She's… not good. She looks so…near death, so peaceful. It's scary." He said, fighting back tears.
Ginny looked crushed.
"But Pomfrey said that now she's survived the night, she has a good chance, so maybe…" Ron trailed off, wanting to cheer her up but not give false hope.
Ginny nodded and smiled bravely.
"Well, everybody has been asking about her, what should that we say?" She asked.
"Just that Hermione had a little accident…" Said Harry glumly.
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1 One Week Later
Draco woke in a hard, cold bed, only a clinical white sheet covering him. He was in plain white pajamas that he didn't recognize and he felt like he had run a marathon twice and then been pounded on the head with an over- sized hammer as congratulations.
He groaned and looked around.
Everything seemed wrong. Maybe he was in some alternate world…? He tried to rub his eyes but couldn't, there was something blocking his hands… his glasses! Draco groaned again. 'You nitwit!' he thought to himself.
He pulled off his glasses and lay them on what he thought was a bedside table; he was still a little groggy. And sluggish, and stiff, and sore, and achy his mind complained.
Someone was pushing a glass of water into his hand and propping him up on fluffy pillows. Madam Pomfrey, he recognized. He took a delicate sip of the water and looked up at her with puppy-dog eyes, saying,
"Madam Pomfrey, why am I here?" Pomfrey just peered down at him, trying to gauge whether he was being sarcastic or not.
She just shook her head sadly and gestured to the bed next to him, then left him with his privacy.
Draco looked at the next bed curiously.
A girl, cinnamon hair… familiar.
He furrowed his brow, making his head hurt even more. He stood shakily, and leant over the girl, trying to see her face…
"Granger?!" He said surprised, what could she be doing… then he remembered.
He dropped his glass with a smash, water flying over him as he stumbled backwards, stunned. Harry, Ron and Ginny, who were sitting in the waiting room studying, ran in.
Madam Pomfrey took one look at him, and saw he was deathly pale and sputtering. She grabbed a vial of purple liquid, ran over to Draco, and tried to force him to sit down. Harry and Ron sprinted over to the bed and helped her. They forced his mouth open, he was struggling with every inch of his strength, and poured the liquid down his throat. He fought it valiantly before he swallowed, grimacing.
"I don't want to go to sleep again!" He managed to say in a strangled voice before he dropped into a deep and dreamless sleep.
Harry, Ron and Ginny all looked at Madam Pomfrey questioningly.
"What was that for?" asked Ron.
"He gets hysterical every time he wakes up, he's too much to handle. I don't know when he'll calm down enough to stay awake."
"What do you mean hysterical?" asked Harry curiously.
Pomfrey sighed.
"I mean totally hysterical. He's fine until he sees Hermione, then he goes crazy. Crying, lashing out at anyone who goes near him, shaking Hermione, and he won't let anyone near her. Last time we had to get Snape, Hagrid and Filch to hold him down and Dumbledore to force-feed him, because he won't eat otherwise."
The three friends looked at each other in shock. They had wondered why Draco was still in the hospital wing, but had figured that he had some unrelated injury. Guess not.
TBC
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AN I've never written anything like the bathroom scene, tell me if it sucked! I don't really know what it would be like to want to kill yourself, so I can only imagine what the motives would be. If you have any suggestions, tell me, I'm open. Also, in this story, they drink watered down Pepperup potion to calm themselves. EEE, don't slaughter me! And, I have more to say! Can you believe that! I wrote this chapter with one hand because I was eating a ham, feta and FLAMER sandwich for lunch. Yummy! And naturally, drinking much Orange Juice, mmm.
Thanks to Reviewers:
Damia- rude is NOT the word. That was absolutely horrid of Draco, but it was necessary to the story. I wanted to give Hermione more reason for suicide, and I needed more conflict in their relationship (at the beginning of the first chapter they were fairly chummy, remember. OK, not chummy, but tolerant, at least!). Don't worry, he'll fix it. I hope.
Lena- Thank-you kindly dahling!
BlazingUnknown- oh yes, very cold. I hope he begged to your liking. Unfortunately, I've gotta old-fashioned mind, and never give the females in my stories any physical power. It's all about the mind games and the emotions, baby.
Lyra- yes, the whole bastard/sweet thing. Split personality maybe?
Junsui Chikyuu- I would have had 6 pages for you but this stupid goddamn frikin' hellhole sugarmuffin godfather jesusmaryandjoseph stupid cruddy computer screwed everything up. Sorry for the swearfest but I'm sooooooo angry right now. More tomorrow.
Christina- I will. And every second word, I'll resave what I'm writing honey. *kicks computer*
coolkid189- I joined your group. Glad you liked the story.
Lyra- that is the highest compliment. Thank you so much.
Horny Girl- *ahem* well, unfortunately I don't do graphic sex scenes *blushes at mere thought* you'll have to look for them somewhere else, the most I do is implications. *Heheh* SORRY! It's just that… oh well.
allee kat- I hope this was updated when you got home from school!
StarJade- creepy, yes. Will it get creepier? Definitely.
Sucker For Romance- Draco IS ashamed of himself, believe you me! He's actually hysterical!