She walked into the kitchen, ready to make herself something to eat.
About ten minutes after she'd made some toast and eggs, Buffy came downstairs in nothing but Spike's red button down shirt and black panties. She took one of Dawn's pieces of toast, sitting cross-legged on a stool beside her sister.
"Hi."
Dawn watched her with an odd expression, a small smile playing at her lips.
Buffy grinned. "What are you staring at me for?"
"You slept with Spike."
She at least had the grace to blush; though Dawn was not at all prepared for her sister's lecherous response.
"Well we did go to sleep...eventually."
Dawn almost choked on her eggs. "Buffy!"
"What?"
"I can't believe you said that to me."
"Well...sorry, I'm just..."
Dawn smiled again. "Happy?"
A dreamy look came to the slayer's eyes and she whispered, "Yeah..."
"This is SO cool."
Buffy laughed. "What?"
"You and Spike. It's just...just cool."
"Well, I think Spike'll be glad to hear that was your reaction."
"He knows I support him."
Buffy touched her sister's arm, then took her hand and squeezed it.
"Thank you Dawnie."
"I only want you to feel happy again, Buffy. That's all."
"I know that now. And I am."
"Good."
They both grinned. Dawn eyed her sister's clothes with raised eyebrows.
"You are SO enjoying the whole morning after look. You're working it."
"What? I am not."
"You came down here like you'd just conquered something."
Buffy took Dawn's glass of juice, downing it in one gulp. "No, I haven't done that yet."
"You are so turning into Spike. You know that, don't you?"
"What?"
"You're like Spike's double. He's rubbing off on you."
"Well...I can't deny that, I guess."
Dawn coughed. "You can go back up. I know you're dying to."
Buffy grinned, practically jumping off the stool. "Thanks. Bye."
Dawn just laughed to herself. Things were finally looking up.
She lied beside him, contemplating his sleeping form. The room was entirely dark, save for a dim light the curtains and sheets covering the window couldn't hide. It was odd to be next to a vampire during the day. Angel had always stayed awake for her on mornings she'd come to see him, just so she'd feel more normal.
But Spike...was himself. That was what she needed right now. No one trying to make her feel better, to make life better for her. Just someone who wanted to live alongside her fighting evil baddies, and sometimes...shag.
She grinned. It was official. She really was becoming Spike. It was more fun than she'd ever imagined it could be.
"Slayer..."
She blinked. "You're sleeping. Go to sleep."
He smiled, his eyes still closed. "I can't."
"Why?"
"Because...you're here. You're...effecting...me."
She grinned, her mouth licking across his throat. He groaned. "Oh, am I?"
"Yes...go away. I need sleep."
"We could sleep...together."
He laughed, his eyes opening slowly to look at her. Then he laughed again. "You are such a slut for this..."
She kissed him. "Baby..."
"Hmm?"
"You love it when I'm a slut for you. So shut your mouth."
He grinned, absently running his fingers across her cheek. "Why don't you shut it for me?"
"You'd like that, huh?"
"Mmm...hmm..."
She leaned over and opened her mouth a little before sucking on his throat. Then she bit him a little and he laughed. "You...you're..."
"I love your throat...yummm..."
He let her finish and then looked at her. She saw fire in his eyes and silently thanked the powers that be for making him a vampire. She didn't even think of thanking his sire, she didn't even want to think about...her.
Spike noticed the glare her eyes made and frowned. "What are you thinking about?"
She cleared her head a little, then smiled at him. "Nothing."
"Buffy tell me."
"I was...Drusilla, okay? I was thinking about Drusilla."
"What the hell are you doing that for?"
She sighed, rolling off of him. "Nothing."
"Don't do that. 'M not going to take that from you."
She glared at him. "You're not going to take that from me? Who do you think you are, my master?"
Spike stood up, walking over to her completely naked. He stood in front of her, then pushed her down onto the bed, looming over her. "You're mine."
She trembled a little. "No."
"Too late. You already said you were."
"Well...I take it back."
He smiled, a finger lightly tracing the line of her face. "Fine."
He sat up, looking around for his clothes.
Buffy stared at him, speechless.
She watched him dress and then Spike walked out of her bedroom wearing his black jeans and an undershirt, showing off the muscles on his arms. The same arms she'd run her tongue over last night.
Her eyes settled on the darkening spot on his throat, and she saw it was already healing. It wouldn't be there the next time she saw him.
"I..."
He just...left.
No, wait. He can't leave. The sun's still out. Yeah.
"Yeah...jerk."
She sighed, stretching and looking around for her clothes. She realized she was still wearing his shirt, and brought it to her nose.
It still smelled like him a little.
Buffy took his shirt off and hung it up in her closet.
Dawn heard Spike before she saw him. "'M gonna sleep in your room, Bit. Okay?"
She turned around and saw Spike lurking in the shadows between the kitchen and the dining room. "Uh...okay. Is...?" she started to ask, but he turned and walked back upstairs.
Dawn followed him and Spike stopped before heading up the stairs. "What?"
"Is everything...okay?"
"Fine. Just...bloody fine."
"Spike, what's wrong?"
He swallowed. "Nothing. 'M going to sleep, Bit."
Dawn didn't follow him as he walked upstairs.
As soon as she lost site of Spike, Buffy was standing at the top of the stairs. Her eyes were a little red when she came down to meet Dawn. "Buffy, what did you do?"
"Me? What did I do?"
"Well it had to be you. It's always you."
Buffy glared at her. "You know, you're supposed to be MY sister. Not his. And you don't even know what you're talking about so I'd be quiet before you get me angry."
"Buffy, you were just happy like ten minutes ago and..."
Buffy pushed past her, and opened the front door. She looked at back at Dawn, her eyes full of tears. "Yeah...well...things change."
Then she left, slamming the door behind her.
-----------
She entered the Magic Box with her key, locking the door behind her.
Then she burst into tears, sliding to the floor.
What was wrong with her? There was no reason at all why she'd done that. And Spike was...she'd hurt him just...because.
The worst part was that now when she hurt him it wasn't as easy to pretend it didn't matter because...it hurt her too.
Somewhere along the way she'd started to care maybe even to l...
"No." she whispered, standing up.
She walked around the shop, wiping tears from her face. "No! I can't...no."
"You can't what?"
She turned around to see Tara staring at her from the doorway of her training room.
"I..."
"Spike...this is about him?"
Buffy's mouth started to quiver, and she let out a sob. Tara walked over to her and held her tightly.
"It's okay...shh..."
Buffy couldn't breathe. Why was she crying? It didn't make any sense. Spike was fun. This was supposed to be just feeling. Not hurting.
"I hurt," she whispered, hugging Tara back.
She felt Tara shaking against her. "So do I...Buffy I...I need to tell you something."
Buffy pulled away from her and took a deep breath. "What."
"Willow...last night...she...she..."
"What? Tara tell me."
"I called Angel."
Buffy turned around to see Willow standing in the doorway of the shop. "You...what?"
The witch smiled. "I called Angel. I knew that if I just called him and the two of you talked..."
The blood in Buffy's body went ice cold.
Spike.
Something was wrong. She could feel something wrong. "Why? What gives you the right to just...to make decisions in MY life?"
They stood on opposite sides of the shop, Willow making no move to be closer to her. "Because you don't understand what you're doing. And you need someone to help you. You won't listen to me so..."
Buffy laughed. "I can't believe the gall you have! Thinking you're better than me at my life! Where is Angel, Willow? What did you tell him, huh? That Spike brainwashed me into thinking I loved him? Is that it? You can't even fathom that I could love someone because of what they were deep down inside?"
Willow walked closer to her and then stopped when they were less than three feet apart. "Love? You don't love him."
Buffy stopped smiling, her eyes widening. "I..."
"He's just a spineless, worthless piece of flesh that looks good to you...you can't ever..."
She wasn't even hearing Willow's argument, and Willow made no move to back away when she started to shorten their span apart.
The sound of her fist slamming into Willow's face was the only thing heard throughout the quiet shop. Willow fell back, staring up at the slayer in shock.
Then Buffy kicked her in the stomach, over and over again, tears streaming down her face.
She stopped, barely able to take a breath and saw Willow still breathing.
Buffy swallowed a sob, leaning down to make Willow look at her.
"I've never loved anyone more than I love Spike. And I've never wanted to kill anyone more than I want to kill you right now."
Willow stared at her with cold eyes, not saying a word.
Buffy let her head fall back and then turned to look at Tara, who was contemplating Willow with shock. She made no move to go to her. "If I were you, I'd stay as far away from her as I possibly could."
Then she left.
About ten minutes after she'd made some toast and eggs, Buffy came downstairs in nothing but Spike's red button down shirt and black panties. She took one of Dawn's pieces of toast, sitting cross-legged on a stool beside her sister.
"Hi."
Dawn watched her with an odd expression, a small smile playing at her lips.
Buffy grinned. "What are you staring at me for?"
"You slept with Spike."
She at least had the grace to blush; though Dawn was not at all prepared for her sister's lecherous response.
"Well we did go to sleep...eventually."
Dawn almost choked on her eggs. "Buffy!"
"What?"
"I can't believe you said that to me."
"Well...sorry, I'm just..."
Dawn smiled again. "Happy?"
A dreamy look came to the slayer's eyes and she whispered, "Yeah..."
"This is SO cool."
Buffy laughed. "What?"
"You and Spike. It's just...just cool."
"Well, I think Spike'll be glad to hear that was your reaction."
"He knows I support him."
Buffy touched her sister's arm, then took her hand and squeezed it.
"Thank you Dawnie."
"I only want you to feel happy again, Buffy. That's all."
"I know that now. And I am."
"Good."
They both grinned. Dawn eyed her sister's clothes with raised eyebrows.
"You are SO enjoying the whole morning after look. You're working it."
"What? I am not."
"You came down here like you'd just conquered something."
Buffy took Dawn's glass of juice, downing it in one gulp. "No, I haven't done that yet."
"You are so turning into Spike. You know that, don't you?"
"What?"
"You're like Spike's double. He's rubbing off on you."
"Well...I can't deny that, I guess."
Dawn coughed. "You can go back up. I know you're dying to."
Buffy grinned, practically jumping off the stool. "Thanks. Bye."
Dawn just laughed to herself. Things were finally looking up.
She lied beside him, contemplating his sleeping form. The room was entirely dark, save for a dim light the curtains and sheets covering the window couldn't hide. It was odd to be next to a vampire during the day. Angel had always stayed awake for her on mornings she'd come to see him, just so she'd feel more normal.
But Spike...was himself. That was what she needed right now. No one trying to make her feel better, to make life better for her. Just someone who wanted to live alongside her fighting evil baddies, and sometimes...shag.
She grinned. It was official. She really was becoming Spike. It was more fun than she'd ever imagined it could be.
"Slayer..."
She blinked. "You're sleeping. Go to sleep."
He smiled, his eyes still closed. "I can't."
"Why?"
"Because...you're here. You're...effecting...me."
She grinned, her mouth licking across his throat. He groaned. "Oh, am I?"
"Yes...go away. I need sleep."
"We could sleep...together."
He laughed, his eyes opening slowly to look at her. Then he laughed again. "You are such a slut for this..."
She kissed him. "Baby..."
"Hmm?"
"You love it when I'm a slut for you. So shut your mouth."
He grinned, absently running his fingers across her cheek. "Why don't you shut it for me?"
"You'd like that, huh?"
"Mmm...hmm..."
She leaned over and opened her mouth a little before sucking on his throat. Then she bit him a little and he laughed. "You...you're..."
"I love your throat...yummm..."
He let her finish and then looked at her. She saw fire in his eyes and silently thanked the powers that be for making him a vampire. She didn't even think of thanking his sire, she didn't even want to think about...her.
Spike noticed the glare her eyes made and frowned. "What are you thinking about?"
She cleared her head a little, then smiled at him. "Nothing."
"Buffy tell me."
"I was...Drusilla, okay? I was thinking about Drusilla."
"What the hell are you doing that for?"
She sighed, rolling off of him. "Nothing."
"Don't do that. 'M not going to take that from you."
She glared at him. "You're not going to take that from me? Who do you think you are, my master?"
Spike stood up, walking over to her completely naked. He stood in front of her, then pushed her down onto the bed, looming over her. "You're mine."
She trembled a little. "No."
"Too late. You already said you were."
"Well...I take it back."
He smiled, a finger lightly tracing the line of her face. "Fine."
He sat up, looking around for his clothes.
Buffy stared at him, speechless.
She watched him dress and then Spike walked out of her bedroom wearing his black jeans and an undershirt, showing off the muscles on his arms. The same arms she'd run her tongue over last night.
Her eyes settled on the darkening spot on his throat, and she saw it was already healing. It wouldn't be there the next time she saw him.
"I..."
He just...left.
No, wait. He can't leave. The sun's still out. Yeah.
"Yeah...jerk."
She sighed, stretching and looking around for her clothes. She realized she was still wearing his shirt, and brought it to her nose.
It still smelled like him a little.
Buffy took his shirt off and hung it up in her closet.
Dawn heard Spike before she saw him. "'M gonna sleep in your room, Bit. Okay?"
She turned around and saw Spike lurking in the shadows between the kitchen and the dining room. "Uh...okay. Is...?" she started to ask, but he turned and walked back upstairs.
Dawn followed him and Spike stopped before heading up the stairs. "What?"
"Is everything...okay?"
"Fine. Just...bloody fine."
"Spike, what's wrong?"
He swallowed. "Nothing. 'M going to sleep, Bit."
Dawn didn't follow him as he walked upstairs.
As soon as she lost site of Spike, Buffy was standing at the top of the stairs. Her eyes were a little red when she came down to meet Dawn. "Buffy, what did you do?"
"Me? What did I do?"
"Well it had to be you. It's always you."
Buffy glared at her. "You know, you're supposed to be MY sister. Not his. And you don't even know what you're talking about so I'd be quiet before you get me angry."
"Buffy, you were just happy like ten minutes ago and..."
Buffy pushed past her, and opened the front door. She looked at back at Dawn, her eyes full of tears. "Yeah...well...things change."
Then she left, slamming the door behind her.
-----------
She entered the Magic Box with her key, locking the door behind her.
Then she burst into tears, sliding to the floor.
What was wrong with her? There was no reason at all why she'd done that. And Spike was...she'd hurt him just...because.
The worst part was that now when she hurt him it wasn't as easy to pretend it didn't matter because...it hurt her too.
Somewhere along the way she'd started to care maybe even to l...
"No." she whispered, standing up.
She walked around the shop, wiping tears from her face. "No! I can't...no."
"You can't what?"
She turned around to see Tara staring at her from the doorway of her training room.
"I..."
"Spike...this is about him?"
Buffy's mouth started to quiver, and she let out a sob. Tara walked over to her and held her tightly.
"It's okay...shh..."
Buffy couldn't breathe. Why was she crying? It didn't make any sense. Spike was fun. This was supposed to be just feeling. Not hurting.
"I hurt," she whispered, hugging Tara back.
She felt Tara shaking against her. "So do I...Buffy I...I need to tell you something."
Buffy pulled away from her and took a deep breath. "What."
"Willow...last night...she...she..."
"What? Tara tell me."
"I called Angel."
Buffy turned around to see Willow standing in the doorway of the shop. "You...what?"
The witch smiled. "I called Angel. I knew that if I just called him and the two of you talked..."
The blood in Buffy's body went ice cold.
Spike.
Something was wrong. She could feel something wrong. "Why? What gives you the right to just...to make decisions in MY life?"
They stood on opposite sides of the shop, Willow making no move to be closer to her. "Because you don't understand what you're doing. And you need someone to help you. You won't listen to me so..."
Buffy laughed. "I can't believe the gall you have! Thinking you're better than me at my life! Where is Angel, Willow? What did you tell him, huh? That Spike brainwashed me into thinking I loved him? Is that it? You can't even fathom that I could love someone because of what they were deep down inside?"
Willow walked closer to her and then stopped when they were less than three feet apart. "Love? You don't love him."
Buffy stopped smiling, her eyes widening. "I..."
"He's just a spineless, worthless piece of flesh that looks good to you...you can't ever..."
She wasn't even hearing Willow's argument, and Willow made no move to back away when she started to shorten their span apart.
The sound of her fist slamming into Willow's face was the only thing heard throughout the quiet shop. Willow fell back, staring up at the slayer in shock.
Then Buffy kicked her in the stomach, over and over again, tears streaming down her face.
She stopped, barely able to take a breath and saw Willow still breathing.
Buffy swallowed a sob, leaning down to make Willow look at her.
"I've never loved anyone more than I love Spike. And I've never wanted to kill anyone more than I want to kill you right now."
Willow stared at her with cold eyes, not saying a word.
Buffy let her head fall back and then turned to look at Tara, who was contemplating Willow with shock. She made no move to go to her. "If I were you, I'd stay as far away from her as I possibly could."
Then she left.