A/N: Sorry this took so long! It isn't as long or as complicated as I'd hoped. I'm STILL not done with this and I WILL finish, I swear. Really.
Dawn Summers came home late that night after leaving the annoyingly quiet magic shop to her sister's friends.
Buffy wouldn't care anyway...wallowing in her sorrow about Spike and all.
She walked into the dark house and heard giggling from the dining room.
"I never said to make me dinner! I don't eat."
"Well you'd better learn. I need to practice making this stuff for Dawnie...she needs real food."
"I can cook."
"And where are you during the morning and noon hours of the day, huh?"
She peeked around the corner and saw Spike sitting at the table, and her sister in his lap feeding him bloody pieces of steak.
She blinked, not sure what she was seeing.
Yep. It was real.
She started to turn back around when Spike's voice stopped her. "Hello Niblet...late night?"
She came out of the shadows and smiled warily. "Uh...yeah. I...was at Stacy's."
Buffy smiled at her. "Stacy?"
"My friend...Stacy."
"Do I know her?"
Dawn was about to explain who Stacy was when Spike interrupted. "You don't know her...she's...one of Dawn's newer friends. Quite annoying...cute...but not very..."
"She's not annoying."
Buffy grinned, kissing Spike on the cheek. "Stop being cute. She doesn't like when you make fun of her. And she can't fight back."
Dawn suddenly felt very angry with her sister. "I CAN TOO! I...you don't know what I can do! You...I've...I grew up real fast while you were..."
Buffy stopped smiling and finished her sentence. "Dead? It's okay Dawnie, you can say it. I have."
Spike wrapped his arm around Buffy's shoulder and squeezed. He kissed her sister's forehead and Dawn saw tears in Buffy's eyes.
"Are you gonna tell me? Are...will you ever just say it?" she whispered.
Buffy looked at her with hollow eyes, blinking.
Spike stared Dawn down and she felt like an intruder in her sister's life.
It wasn't supposed to be that way.
"I know...Buffy. I...I've known. You...it's obvious."
"Is it?" Buffy whispered, her eyes hardening.
"You're hurting things more keeping it to yourself. I...I had to deal with it on my own and...I would've...liked to help you."
Buffy looked away from her and met Spike's eyes. He kissed her softly and she sighed. "I don't need help anymore. I'm fine."
"Yeah...because of Spike. Because you don't want to deal with pain and Spike doesn't want to hurt you. He'll do anything not to hurt you and..."
"He hurts me all the time....and I hurt him. That's how we are. The only thing different is that there's no shit that comes along with it. He..."
Dawn swallowed. "I...I love you Buffy. You're my sister. I only...I only want to know what's wrong."
"I'm fine Dawn. I'm not talking about this."
"You were in Heaven Buffy. You...they took you from there."
She let out a cry when Buffy started to sob, and Spike held her tightly. He looked at Dawn and sighed.
"C'mere Bit...come here."
"I...I didn't..."
Buffy looked at her, still not able to stop the tears from coming and nodded. "Dawnie.."
Dawn went over to her and they hugged, both crying.
"I...I'm so sorry...I..."
"I...you...I...oh..."
Buffy took a deep breath, coughing. She ran fingers through her baby sister's hair and hummed under her breath. "It's okay...I...I'm okay...I..." she choked and Spike kissed her.
"Things are getting better here...I have you...and I have Spike. That's all I need."
Dawn fell into her sister's embrace, not moving. "I'm so sorry."
"I needed to come back Dawnie...I know that now. There was a reason."
She looked at Spike again, then started to stand. Dawn fell in step with her and stood as well, not letting her go.
Spike watched them silently, and then decided to let them be alone.
Willow was asleep and Tara watched her.
She looked happier.
Felt...better.
There was something in her eyes though...everyone could see it.
Tara sighed, closing her eyes.
"Willow."
She heard Willow sigh and felt a whisper in her head.
Yes?
"Buffy's..."
Lying to us.
Tara opened her eyes. "She is?"
Mm hmm...she is.
"Are you..."
I'm fine, baby. Come to sleep.
Tars smiled lying back down next to her love and petting Willow's hair. "I love you."
She saw Willow smile and then open her eyes. "I know...that's all I need."
They kissed and Willow's fingers grazed her throat. Tara sighed.
"Willow...it's been..."
Willow kissed her there. "I know...I know baby."
She tickled along Tara's neck and hummed to herself. "So beautiful..."
"I am not."
She smiled. "You are."
"You're biased."
"Maybe I am."
Tara smiled, looking at her. "Willow...tell me."
"I love you baby."
"I love you too."
She got Dawn to sleep and came back downstairs to an empty room.
Stupid Spike.
She cleaned up the dishes and was putting them into the dishwasher when he came through the door.
"Hello l..."
"Where were you?"
Spike froze.
"Where were you, Spike?"
"I...I thought...you needed time alone with your baby sis, Slayer...I was..."
Buffy turned and glared at him. "You could've said goodbye...you...Dawn thought you were mad at her and...I...I had to reassure her that you weren't leaving me. Me. I had to."
Spike closed the distance between them and put his hand out to touch her arm.
"Buffy."
"Don't just expect me to shut you out."
"I..."
"I need you here. I..."
"'M sorry."
Their eyes met and she sighed, leaning into him. "Spike..."
"Hmm?"
"I love you."
He smiled. "Good."
"More than I've ever loved..."
"Don't Buffy just..."
"Anyone."
He stopped smiling and she was trembling. "I...I trust you with me. I...I never trusted anyone with that. With...the bad stuff."
She looked up at him again, not smiling. "Make love to me."
He stared at her, eyes searching her face. She touched his cheek, smiling.
"Now?"
She kissed his mouth, standing up a little on her toes to meet his mouth.
Spike's hands came up under her butt, and he leaned her on the sink.
Then he started to devour her from the neck down.
She sighed. "Spike..."
"Buffy I..."
"I love you."
He growled. "Don't...stop."
She smiled. "I'm not going to."
Dawn Summers came home late that night after leaving the annoyingly quiet magic shop to her sister's friends.
Buffy wouldn't care anyway...wallowing in her sorrow about Spike and all.
She walked into the dark house and heard giggling from the dining room.
"I never said to make me dinner! I don't eat."
"Well you'd better learn. I need to practice making this stuff for Dawnie...she needs real food."
"I can cook."
"And where are you during the morning and noon hours of the day, huh?"
She peeked around the corner and saw Spike sitting at the table, and her sister in his lap feeding him bloody pieces of steak.
She blinked, not sure what she was seeing.
Yep. It was real.
She started to turn back around when Spike's voice stopped her. "Hello Niblet...late night?"
She came out of the shadows and smiled warily. "Uh...yeah. I...was at Stacy's."
Buffy smiled at her. "Stacy?"
"My friend...Stacy."
"Do I know her?"
Dawn was about to explain who Stacy was when Spike interrupted. "You don't know her...she's...one of Dawn's newer friends. Quite annoying...cute...but not very..."
"She's not annoying."
Buffy grinned, kissing Spike on the cheek. "Stop being cute. She doesn't like when you make fun of her. And she can't fight back."
Dawn suddenly felt very angry with her sister. "I CAN TOO! I...you don't know what I can do! You...I've...I grew up real fast while you were..."
Buffy stopped smiling and finished her sentence. "Dead? It's okay Dawnie, you can say it. I have."
Spike wrapped his arm around Buffy's shoulder and squeezed. He kissed her sister's forehead and Dawn saw tears in Buffy's eyes.
"Are you gonna tell me? Are...will you ever just say it?" she whispered.
Buffy looked at her with hollow eyes, blinking.
Spike stared Dawn down and she felt like an intruder in her sister's life.
It wasn't supposed to be that way.
"I know...Buffy. I...I've known. You...it's obvious."
"Is it?" Buffy whispered, her eyes hardening.
"You're hurting things more keeping it to yourself. I...I had to deal with it on my own and...I would've...liked to help you."
Buffy looked away from her and met Spike's eyes. He kissed her softly and she sighed. "I don't need help anymore. I'm fine."
"Yeah...because of Spike. Because you don't want to deal with pain and Spike doesn't want to hurt you. He'll do anything not to hurt you and..."
"He hurts me all the time....and I hurt him. That's how we are. The only thing different is that there's no shit that comes along with it. He..."
Dawn swallowed. "I...I love you Buffy. You're my sister. I only...I only want to know what's wrong."
"I'm fine Dawn. I'm not talking about this."
"You were in Heaven Buffy. You...they took you from there."
She let out a cry when Buffy started to sob, and Spike held her tightly. He looked at Dawn and sighed.
"C'mere Bit...come here."
"I...I didn't..."
Buffy looked at her, still not able to stop the tears from coming and nodded. "Dawnie.."
Dawn went over to her and they hugged, both crying.
"I...I'm so sorry...I..."
"I...you...I...oh..."
Buffy took a deep breath, coughing. She ran fingers through her baby sister's hair and hummed under her breath. "It's okay...I...I'm okay...I..." she choked and Spike kissed her.
"Things are getting better here...I have you...and I have Spike. That's all I need."
Dawn fell into her sister's embrace, not moving. "I'm so sorry."
"I needed to come back Dawnie...I know that now. There was a reason."
She looked at Spike again, then started to stand. Dawn fell in step with her and stood as well, not letting her go.
Spike watched them silently, and then decided to let them be alone.
Willow was asleep and Tara watched her.
She looked happier.
Felt...better.
There was something in her eyes though...everyone could see it.
Tara sighed, closing her eyes.
"Willow."
She heard Willow sigh and felt a whisper in her head.
Yes?
"Buffy's..."
Lying to us.
Tara opened her eyes. "She is?"
Mm hmm...she is.
"Are you..."
I'm fine, baby. Come to sleep.
Tars smiled lying back down next to her love and petting Willow's hair. "I love you."
She saw Willow smile and then open her eyes. "I know...that's all I need."
They kissed and Willow's fingers grazed her throat. Tara sighed.
"Willow...it's been..."
Willow kissed her there. "I know...I know baby."
She tickled along Tara's neck and hummed to herself. "So beautiful..."
"I am not."
She smiled. "You are."
"You're biased."
"Maybe I am."
Tara smiled, looking at her. "Willow...tell me."
"I love you baby."
"I love you too."
She got Dawn to sleep and came back downstairs to an empty room.
Stupid Spike.
She cleaned up the dishes and was putting them into the dishwasher when he came through the door.
"Hello l..."
"Where were you?"
Spike froze.
"Where were you, Spike?"
"I...I thought...you needed time alone with your baby sis, Slayer...I was..."
Buffy turned and glared at him. "You could've said goodbye...you...Dawn thought you were mad at her and...I...I had to reassure her that you weren't leaving me. Me. I had to."
Spike closed the distance between them and put his hand out to touch her arm.
"Buffy."
"Don't just expect me to shut you out."
"I..."
"I need you here. I..."
"'M sorry."
Their eyes met and she sighed, leaning into him. "Spike..."
"Hmm?"
"I love you."
He smiled. "Good."
"More than I've ever loved..."
"Don't Buffy just..."
"Anyone."
He stopped smiling and she was trembling. "I...I trust you with me. I...I never trusted anyone with that. With...the bad stuff."
She looked up at him again, not smiling. "Make love to me."
He stared at her, eyes searching her face. She touched his cheek, smiling.
"Now?"
She kissed his mouth, standing up a little on her toes to meet his mouth.
Spike's hands came up under her butt, and he leaned her on the sink.
Then he started to devour her from the neck down.
She sighed. "Spike..."
"Buffy I..."
"I love you."
He growled. "Don't...stop."
She smiled. "I'm not going to."