And now, for our obligatory disclaimer break:
Ugh, I'm really getting sick of writing these disclaimers and my chapters are just getting longer and longer. I have failed. *wails* That's why I need all of you to leave me supportive ego boosting comments so that I can write better and longer disclaimers in a more timely fashion. Without your support, I don't think I'll have the will power to keep writing my disclaim…err…story. *wipes brow*

I must take a serious moment here to give you a real disclaimer. This is the first page that has monkey sex as seen through the eyes of a hamster. There is also Ebichu abuse. If these ideas bother you, please stop reading now. However, if you've managed to survive any yaoi Furuba fics, I don't think you have anything to worry about. This comedy is only rated R after all.

The sun has now risen, it's 6 am, and I have a headache so I guess I'll have to leave out some of the obligatory disclaimer stuff. Oh, I managed to stick in a personal complaint! *dances excitedly* (use of obligatory dancing of happiness) Well, that was a total surprise. I must be a natural.

Ring Around the Collar Page 3

For a good few minutes, Ebichu and Yuki just stared at each other, each lost in their own thoughts. Yuki was trying to figure out why he still hadn't transformed back. He realized that the collar probably prevented him from changing because it would choke him. "All I wanted to do was buy some snake poison, murder my brother, and take Touru all for myself, and *this* had to happen. Inconceivable," he sighed, still struggling to get the bottle ring off his neck. Ebichu was having completely different thoughts, however, and was lost in a flashback.

*Flashback*
Goshujin-sama and her boyfriend were at it again. For some reason, they enjoyed making the bed squeak at night, especially on the weekends. Sometimes the squeaking got them so excited that they moaned and screamed in response. They often used props to help make the bed squeak louder. This time, Goshujin-sama's lousy boyfriend was wearing a thick collar around his neck. Ebichu didn't understand it's purpose, but Goshujin-sama seemed to be more in charge this time and was ordering him around.

They took a break from making the bed squeak to play charades. The boyfriend got on all fours and howled, screaming "please forgive me, please forgive me." While Ebichu didn't know why he was saying that phrase, she was smart enough to figure out that he was pretending to be a dog. She was proud of her self for getting one of the charades right.

The humans eventually got really creative and decided to simultaneously make the bed squeak and to play charades. Goshujin-sama pretended to be a cowboy and rode on top of her "horse" boyfriend and yelled "ai, ai, ai!"

*Flashback*
"That's it, I've had it with you! You are a good for nothing vermin who can't do anything right! Why I ever bothered spending $10 on you, I'll never know," Goshujin-sama yelled and flung Ebichu into the wall, as was her norm. Ebichu slowly slid down, leaving yet another streak of blood to cover the many lining the apartment walls. Ebichu had once again managed to mess things up in her naivete. "You should take example from those that are better than you and learn something."

"Yes, Goshujin-sama," Ebichu cried, bowing her squat little rodent body as best she could in supplication. "I'll try my best." To Ebichu, Goshujin-sama was someone to look up to and so she decided to try to emulate her owner as best she could. She still didn't understand many things, especially those involving the Goshujin's lousy boyfriend, but she vowed that she would learn them one day.
*End Flashbacks*

TBC….

(Insert obligatory question for the reader about their opinion of the story. Sorry I forgot to do this earlier.)
So how was it minna? Did you like it? I will get the next chapter out as soon as I can (This is an outright lie. I will actually wait I get enough positive feedback before I deem it worthy to continue to share my greatness with you).
(Insert obligatory restatement of previous shameful begging and threaten not to continue the story)
Please leave me happy fuzzy bunny comments and beg me to finish this story. If you don't, then I might not finish it and poor Ebichu will die a virgin!