Journey Home
Mulan let herself fall on her knees and started to cry hysterically, screming,"It can´t be!".
Shang put his arms around her body and asked softly,"What happened?"
Mulan shook her head and did not answer.
Shang picked the scroll and read it to himself, what the scroll said was something he himself just couldn´t believe...the turks had killed Mulan´s parents.
Shang couldn´t stand to see her like that, so vulnerable and so defeated, she just cried and cried as if life would never be happy again for her.
Shang held her close and passed his fingers gently through her hair; he wanted to let her know that he would always be there with her no matter what, to give her strength and love to go on, and he was so sorry for her loss. "It´s all right Mulan," he soothed
"No, it´s not," she replied bitterly, "it´s not ...I will never see my parents again."
"But I´m here with you," Shang whispered into her ears.
Mulan let out a cry and hugged Shang.
"I love you Mulan." Shang kissed Mulan´s forehead and gave her a light squeeze of affection. Mulan rested her head on Shang´s shoulder as tears kept falling from her eyes, then she raised hery eyes and met Shang´s for a while. He could see the mixture of fear, sadness, and anger in her pure and beautiful eyes, and he hated the fact that she was suffering. Shang couldn´t explain himself how people could be so cruel just to kill for no good reason; it made him furious to tell the truth.
"Shang," Mulan called softly.
"Yes?"
"I´m scared,"she confessed.
Shang put his finger under Mulan´s chin and lifted her face so she would look at him straight.
"Mulan, look, I know this is hard, but I... I´m here with you and I´m never gonna leave you alone... I swear." Mulan nodded, it was good to know that she had his support, but that wouldn´t bring her parents back to life.
"Shang I need to see my grandmother."
"I know , but you must sleep for now, and tomorrow we will leave."
Mulan broke the embrace between them and quietly went to her tento still crying. Shang just watched her leace feeling sorry for her and feeling stupid for not being able to comfort her. He thought that maybe he deserved it, for ignoring Ping the day his own father died. He knew what this situation was like so well, a feeling of complete emptiness, and the sensation of the world falling over you. When his own father died, he had been strong from outside but inside , his heart was torn into pieces painfully. He had to be strong to give courage to the remaining soldiers, and he had the weight of responsabilities on his shoulders.
Shang just hoped that Mulan would recover from this as soon as possible for she wasn´t the kind of person who spends too much time depressed.
Lynn noticed Mulan as she went into her tent weeping so she decided to go and see what was wrong with her.
Mulan felt a terrible pain inside of her heart. She didn´t remember feeling so much pain before and she just couldn´t take it anymore.
"May I come in?" Lynn asked from outside the tent.
"Go away!" Mulan replied.
Lynn ignored her, and got inside the tent. There she found Mulan laying on the blankets ans squeezing them tightly, her eyes were all red from crying. That was definately not the Mulan she knew.
"Tung Ma told me you received a message, what was it about?"
"Please go," Mulan repeated softly, "I want to be alone."
Lynn nodded, but she didn´t move an inch. Instead, she just watched Mulan cry.
"What happened?" she insisted, as she sat next to her friend.
Mulan gave up, and finally answered the question. "Those fucking bastards killied my parents." Her voice sounded bitter and weak.
Lynn gasped, she really felt so sorry for her friend. "I´m sorry," Lynn whispered and hugged Mulan.
Obviously, Lynn couldn´t stay for long in the tent so she finally asked, "Are you going home?"
Mulan said, " Yes, but it will only be for a couple of days, be careful Lynn."
"I will," Lynn replied making her way out of the tent, " You too." With that, Lynn sneeked out of Mulan´s tent and went into her own.
That night, Shang wrote a message for the other troops, requesting them to join them as soon as possible. Also, Shang decided he was going to escort Mulan home, so nothing would happen to her on he way. He knew it was his responsability to stay with the soldiers, but he had to be with Mulan now more than before. Shang asked Tung Ma to keep order among the warriors while he was away.
By dawn, Mulan was already set to leave, she was just putting the saddle on Khan´s back and fastening the reins on him also. Once she was done, she mounted Khan. By then, Shang was already awake, he only had to get his own horse ready.
"Wait up Mulan!" he called.
Mulan got down her horse and walked to Shang.
"Shang, you don´t have to come with me,"said Mulan. Her voice sounded so different than other times.
"But I want to go with you," Shang replied, " I can´t let you go all by yourself."
"Thank you Shang."
A few minutes later, Mulan and Shang left camp and made their way to Mulan´s hometown. The rest of the soldiers stayed at camp, Shang had allowed them to take a break while he and Mulan were away.
During the journey, Mulan and Shang exchanged just a few words. Mulan wasn´t in a mood for talking at all, and Shang didn´t want to force her to say something because he knew it would only make her feel uncomfortable. The last thing he needed was Mulan getting mad at him.
They got to Mulan´s house before sunset; it was all quiet and lonely. The feeling of emptiness remained around the place. Granny Fa greeted them as soon as she heard the noise the horses made. First of all, she hugged her grandchild, and both women started to cry. "Are you ok?" asked Granny Fa.
"No, I´m not," whispered Mulan.
It was so weird to see Granny Fa depressed, when she would usually be joking, and repeating over and over how wonderful life was, or even she could flirt some. Shang wondered if they would be back to normal someday, though now it seemed impossible when their hearts were torn into tiny pieces with the loss of two very important members of the Fa Family.
"Let´s get inside," Granny suggested, "I´ll prepare you guys something to eat, you must be tired from traveling."
Mulan and Shang followed Granny Fa into the kitchen.
Mulan helped Granny with the cooking, and when she looked outside the window and noticed the shrine was destroyed.
"What happened to the shrine?" she asked.
"Those damn idiots destroyed it," Granny cursed bitterly, " They thought we had gold or something hidden there."
So that´s why Mushu and Cri-kee didn´t go after her, not satisfied by killing her parents, the invaders had also killed her guardians and destroyed the shrine that her family and proudly built there. Tears rolled down her cheeks silently.
"Mulan your tears are not worth it," Granny Fa said, "We have to go on with our lives."
Mulan wiped the tears from her face with her hand and took the bowls filled with chicken and rice to the table in which Shang awaited.
Mulan, Shang, and Granny ate dinner together silently.
"It´s delicious," Shang said.
"I´m glad you like it son," Granny Fa said with a smile, " Mulan helped me."
After dinner, Granny Fa left the table and went to bed. She did it on purpose so Mulan and Shang would talk.
Shang did not know what to say, he wanted to talk to Mulan about anything, just to hear the sound of her voice. He thought about a pleasant conversation which didn´t involve the subject of her dead parents.
Mulan had barely touched her food, she hadn´t eaten anything that day. The truth was that when she got depressed she lost her appetite. Instead, she just played with her chopsticks.
"Mulan," Shang started, "I´ve been wondering...where would you like to live after we get married?"
"Wherever," she simply answered.
" I would like to know your opinion," Shang said politely.
"My opinion doesn´t matter," muttered Mulan.
"Of course it does...it matters to me more than anything."
"Could you stop asking me that?" I´m not in a mood right now," asked Mulan irritated.
"Then what do you want to talk about?"
"Nothing, nothing just leave me alone, I don´t want to talk to anyone." She crossed her arms on the table and rested her head on them..
"Sometimes it´s better to tell someone what you feel, because you need to get it out." Shang placed his hand on her shoulder.
"What´s it worth?" Mulan cried, "It won´t bring them back anyway."
"Mulan your parents wouldn´t want you to suffer."
"Then I´m supposed to laugh as if nothing happened..." she said sarcastically, " Or maybe I could make a celebration because of it."
"No, but they want you to go on with your life," Shang went on, "although you cannot see them, they are watching over you because they love you."
"I can´t stand this anymore,...I want my parents alive," she said crying bitterly.
Shang got closer to her and hugged her, he was concious that she needed him now more than before to give her the courage to go on. Shang slowly bent down to kiss her mouth. That moment he realized he had become adicted to her kisses.
When they pulled away Mulan whispered, "Maybe this is only a cruel nightmare."
"Then we can make it a dream," replied Shang kissing her neck. He pulled her with him to the floor, and kissed her mouth passionately. The kiss was longer than the first, and their bodies were closer than ever before. Mulan´s hearbeat raced and she could only think of a way to prevent this from getting any further. "Shang," she whispered as soon as their lips were separated, " I... I... the floor is so cold down here...and very hard it makes my back hurt."
Shang stood up. All of a sudden, Mulan felt so cold. He helped Mulan get up from the floor.
"I´m sorry, Mulan," Shang said, "I must go now."
Shang started to walk but Mulan stopped him. " Hold on, were are you going?"
"Some place to have some sleep."
Mulan crossed her arms and replied, "There´s plenty of room for you in here."
Shang´s lips curved into a smile thinking how could he say no to her when she was asking him to stay...wait a minute, his mind was in the gutter,but he slapped himself mentally for thinking such things.
"You can sleep in my parents´ room or you can sleep in my room."
"Well, I´ll stay if it´s ok with you."
"Of course it is."
Mulan led Shang into her parents´ room. For a moment, Shang thought Mulan was feeling better but as soon as they entered the room she broke into tears once again. The room was so empty without her parents. She remembered when she was a child she used to run into that very room when she had nighmares and her parents would let her sleep between them to tell her everything would be all right. But now, they weren´t there to sooth her and tell her that everything was going to be fine. Anyway, she had Shang with her. Shang gripped her hand and told her to sit on the bed. Then, he wiped the tears from her face and said, " Mulan you are a strong woman and it kills me to see you suffer."
"I´m not strong," she replied, "I just pretend to be strong." Mulan had her head bent down, looking at her feet.
Shang lifted her face gently and said, "You are going to get through this someday, and you´ll be happy again."
Mulan nodded and said, "Are you going to help me."
"Sure." He bent his head to kiss her and her lips welcomed his kiss. Shang put his hands around Mulan´s waist, lied on the bed and pulled her closer to him. They started to roll on the chamber together making the sheets get wrinkled and getting lost in the passion of their kiss and their bodies embraced so close.
"Shang," Mulan called as he was trying to remove the sash around her waist. " I want to know something."
"What is it?" he replied. He had already gotten what he wanted...her dress was loose revealing her bare shoulders.
"The day you discovered I was a girl..."
Shang cut her off as he slowly removed the upper part of her dress, "That´s in the past now."
He bent to kiss her neck.
Mulan cupped her hands around his face and raised his head so he would look at her. "You´re not listening!" She stopped his hands from caressing her body.
Shang pulled away from her and replied, " I swear that I was not going to kill you... I just wanted to make Chi Fu think I was going to kill you to save you...I missed you on purpose."
He took off his shirt showing off his perfect muscles. Mulan notieced a golden pendant hanging form his neck. She sat up and covered her naked chest with the sheets and examined the pendant carefully. "Stenghth," she read out loud.
Shang nodded and said, " My father gave it to me when I was a teenager." He took the pendant off and placed it around Mulan´s neck. "I want you to have it."
"Thank you it´s beautiful." Mulan lied back on the bed resting her head on the pillows. Shang pressed his body against hers and kissed her some more. Mulan pulled away her lips and said, "I´m not a bitch, Shang."
"Huh?"
She pushed him away. "The matchmaker insinuated me that I had sex with men during war and it´s not true."
"Of course not."
"If we make love tonight, it will only prove her right."
Shang replied, "But no one is going to know."
"And what if I get preagnant?"
"You cannot get pregnant when you´re still wearing half of your dress and I have my pants on."
Mulan cut him off, "Come on Shang, it´s not like you will be satisfied without the whole thing... you will ask for more eventually."
Shang nodded, she was so damn right.
Mulan sat up and put on the part of the dress she was missing .
"Goodnight Shang," she said.
"Goodnight Mulan." Shang said, " Do you think we can make love someday?"
"Yes but not now," Mulan replied, " We can do it when we are sure about it." With that she left the room and headed to her own. When she lied on her bed she sighed with relief.
Mulan let herself fall on her knees and started to cry hysterically, screming,"It can´t be!".
Shang put his arms around her body and asked softly,"What happened?"
Mulan shook her head and did not answer.
Shang picked the scroll and read it to himself, what the scroll said was something he himself just couldn´t believe...the turks had killed Mulan´s parents.
Shang couldn´t stand to see her like that, so vulnerable and so defeated, she just cried and cried as if life would never be happy again for her.
Shang held her close and passed his fingers gently through her hair; he wanted to let her know that he would always be there with her no matter what, to give her strength and love to go on, and he was so sorry for her loss. "It´s all right Mulan," he soothed
"No, it´s not," she replied bitterly, "it´s not ...I will never see my parents again."
"But I´m here with you," Shang whispered into her ears.
Mulan let out a cry and hugged Shang.
"I love you Mulan." Shang kissed Mulan´s forehead and gave her a light squeeze of affection. Mulan rested her head on Shang´s shoulder as tears kept falling from her eyes, then she raised hery eyes and met Shang´s for a while. He could see the mixture of fear, sadness, and anger in her pure and beautiful eyes, and he hated the fact that she was suffering. Shang couldn´t explain himself how people could be so cruel just to kill for no good reason; it made him furious to tell the truth.
"Shang," Mulan called softly.
"Yes?"
"I´m scared,"she confessed.
Shang put his finger under Mulan´s chin and lifted her face so she would look at him straight.
"Mulan, look, I know this is hard, but I... I´m here with you and I´m never gonna leave you alone... I swear." Mulan nodded, it was good to know that she had his support, but that wouldn´t bring her parents back to life.
"Shang I need to see my grandmother."
"I know , but you must sleep for now, and tomorrow we will leave."
Mulan broke the embrace between them and quietly went to her tento still crying. Shang just watched her leace feeling sorry for her and feeling stupid for not being able to comfort her. He thought that maybe he deserved it, for ignoring Ping the day his own father died. He knew what this situation was like so well, a feeling of complete emptiness, and the sensation of the world falling over you. When his own father died, he had been strong from outside but inside , his heart was torn into pieces painfully. He had to be strong to give courage to the remaining soldiers, and he had the weight of responsabilities on his shoulders.
Shang just hoped that Mulan would recover from this as soon as possible for she wasn´t the kind of person who spends too much time depressed.
Lynn noticed Mulan as she went into her tent weeping so she decided to go and see what was wrong with her.
Mulan felt a terrible pain inside of her heart. She didn´t remember feeling so much pain before and she just couldn´t take it anymore.
"May I come in?" Lynn asked from outside the tent.
"Go away!" Mulan replied.
Lynn ignored her, and got inside the tent. There she found Mulan laying on the blankets ans squeezing them tightly, her eyes were all red from crying. That was definately not the Mulan she knew.
"Tung Ma told me you received a message, what was it about?"
"Please go," Mulan repeated softly, "I want to be alone."
Lynn nodded, but she didn´t move an inch. Instead, she just watched Mulan cry.
"What happened?" she insisted, as she sat next to her friend.
Mulan gave up, and finally answered the question. "Those fucking bastards killied my parents." Her voice sounded bitter and weak.
Lynn gasped, she really felt so sorry for her friend. "I´m sorry," Lynn whispered and hugged Mulan.
Obviously, Lynn couldn´t stay for long in the tent so she finally asked, "Are you going home?"
Mulan said, " Yes, but it will only be for a couple of days, be careful Lynn."
"I will," Lynn replied making her way out of the tent, " You too." With that, Lynn sneeked out of Mulan´s tent and went into her own.
That night, Shang wrote a message for the other troops, requesting them to join them as soon as possible. Also, Shang decided he was going to escort Mulan home, so nothing would happen to her on he way. He knew it was his responsability to stay with the soldiers, but he had to be with Mulan now more than before. Shang asked Tung Ma to keep order among the warriors while he was away.
By dawn, Mulan was already set to leave, she was just putting the saddle on Khan´s back and fastening the reins on him also. Once she was done, she mounted Khan. By then, Shang was already awake, he only had to get his own horse ready.
"Wait up Mulan!" he called.
Mulan got down her horse and walked to Shang.
"Shang, you don´t have to come with me,"said Mulan. Her voice sounded so different than other times.
"But I want to go with you," Shang replied, " I can´t let you go all by yourself."
"Thank you Shang."
A few minutes later, Mulan and Shang left camp and made their way to Mulan´s hometown. The rest of the soldiers stayed at camp, Shang had allowed them to take a break while he and Mulan were away.
During the journey, Mulan and Shang exchanged just a few words. Mulan wasn´t in a mood for talking at all, and Shang didn´t want to force her to say something because he knew it would only make her feel uncomfortable. The last thing he needed was Mulan getting mad at him.
They got to Mulan´s house before sunset; it was all quiet and lonely. The feeling of emptiness remained around the place. Granny Fa greeted them as soon as she heard the noise the horses made. First of all, she hugged her grandchild, and both women started to cry. "Are you ok?" asked Granny Fa.
"No, I´m not," whispered Mulan.
It was so weird to see Granny Fa depressed, when she would usually be joking, and repeating over and over how wonderful life was, or even she could flirt some. Shang wondered if they would be back to normal someday, though now it seemed impossible when their hearts were torn into tiny pieces with the loss of two very important members of the Fa Family.
"Let´s get inside," Granny suggested, "I´ll prepare you guys something to eat, you must be tired from traveling."
Mulan and Shang followed Granny Fa into the kitchen.
Mulan helped Granny with the cooking, and when she looked outside the window and noticed the shrine was destroyed.
"What happened to the shrine?" she asked.
"Those damn idiots destroyed it," Granny cursed bitterly, " They thought we had gold or something hidden there."
So that´s why Mushu and Cri-kee didn´t go after her, not satisfied by killing her parents, the invaders had also killed her guardians and destroyed the shrine that her family and proudly built there. Tears rolled down her cheeks silently.
"Mulan your tears are not worth it," Granny Fa said, "We have to go on with our lives."
Mulan wiped the tears from her face with her hand and took the bowls filled with chicken and rice to the table in which Shang awaited.
Mulan, Shang, and Granny ate dinner together silently.
"It´s delicious," Shang said.
"I´m glad you like it son," Granny Fa said with a smile, " Mulan helped me."
After dinner, Granny Fa left the table and went to bed. She did it on purpose so Mulan and Shang would talk.
Shang did not know what to say, he wanted to talk to Mulan about anything, just to hear the sound of her voice. He thought about a pleasant conversation which didn´t involve the subject of her dead parents.
Mulan had barely touched her food, she hadn´t eaten anything that day. The truth was that when she got depressed she lost her appetite. Instead, she just played with her chopsticks.
"Mulan," Shang started, "I´ve been wondering...where would you like to live after we get married?"
"Wherever," she simply answered.
" I would like to know your opinion," Shang said politely.
"My opinion doesn´t matter," muttered Mulan.
"Of course it does...it matters to me more than anything."
"Could you stop asking me that?" I´m not in a mood right now," asked Mulan irritated.
"Then what do you want to talk about?"
"Nothing, nothing just leave me alone, I don´t want to talk to anyone." She crossed her arms on the table and rested her head on them..
"Sometimes it´s better to tell someone what you feel, because you need to get it out." Shang placed his hand on her shoulder.
"What´s it worth?" Mulan cried, "It won´t bring them back anyway."
"Mulan your parents wouldn´t want you to suffer."
"Then I´m supposed to laugh as if nothing happened..." she said sarcastically, " Or maybe I could make a celebration because of it."
"No, but they want you to go on with your life," Shang went on, "although you cannot see them, they are watching over you because they love you."
"I can´t stand this anymore,...I want my parents alive," she said crying bitterly.
Shang got closer to her and hugged her, he was concious that she needed him now more than before to give her the courage to go on. Shang slowly bent down to kiss her mouth. That moment he realized he had become adicted to her kisses.
When they pulled away Mulan whispered, "Maybe this is only a cruel nightmare."
"Then we can make it a dream," replied Shang kissing her neck. He pulled her with him to the floor, and kissed her mouth passionately. The kiss was longer than the first, and their bodies were closer than ever before. Mulan´s hearbeat raced and she could only think of a way to prevent this from getting any further. "Shang," she whispered as soon as their lips were separated, " I... I... the floor is so cold down here...and very hard it makes my back hurt."
Shang stood up. All of a sudden, Mulan felt so cold. He helped Mulan get up from the floor.
"I´m sorry, Mulan," Shang said, "I must go now."
Shang started to walk but Mulan stopped him. " Hold on, were are you going?"
"Some place to have some sleep."
Mulan crossed her arms and replied, "There´s plenty of room for you in here."
Shang´s lips curved into a smile thinking how could he say no to her when she was asking him to stay...wait a minute, his mind was in the gutter,but he slapped himself mentally for thinking such things.
"You can sleep in my parents´ room or you can sleep in my room."
"Well, I´ll stay if it´s ok with you."
"Of course it is."
Mulan led Shang into her parents´ room. For a moment, Shang thought Mulan was feeling better but as soon as they entered the room she broke into tears once again. The room was so empty without her parents. She remembered when she was a child she used to run into that very room when she had nighmares and her parents would let her sleep between them to tell her everything would be all right. But now, they weren´t there to sooth her and tell her that everything was going to be fine. Anyway, she had Shang with her. Shang gripped her hand and told her to sit on the bed. Then, he wiped the tears from her face and said, " Mulan you are a strong woman and it kills me to see you suffer."
"I´m not strong," she replied, "I just pretend to be strong." Mulan had her head bent down, looking at her feet.
Shang lifted her face gently and said, "You are going to get through this someday, and you´ll be happy again."
Mulan nodded and said, "Are you going to help me."
"Sure." He bent his head to kiss her and her lips welcomed his kiss. Shang put his hands around Mulan´s waist, lied on the bed and pulled her closer to him. They started to roll on the chamber together making the sheets get wrinkled and getting lost in the passion of their kiss and their bodies embraced so close.
"Shang," Mulan called as he was trying to remove the sash around her waist. " I want to know something."
"What is it?" he replied. He had already gotten what he wanted...her dress was loose revealing her bare shoulders.
"The day you discovered I was a girl..."
Shang cut her off as he slowly removed the upper part of her dress, "That´s in the past now."
He bent to kiss her neck.
Mulan cupped her hands around his face and raised his head so he would look at her. "You´re not listening!" She stopped his hands from caressing her body.
Shang pulled away from her and replied, " I swear that I was not going to kill you... I just wanted to make Chi Fu think I was going to kill you to save you...I missed you on purpose."
He took off his shirt showing off his perfect muscles. Mulan notieced a golden pendant hanging form his neck. She sat up and covered her naked chest with the sheets and examined the pendant carefully. "Stenghth," she read out loud.
Shang nodded and said, " My father gave it to me when I was a teenager." He took the pendant off and placed it around Mulan´s neck. "I want you to have it."
"Thank you it´s beautiful." Mulan lied back on the bed resting her head on the pillows. Shang pressed his body against hers and kissed her some more. Mulan pulled away her lips and said, "I´m not a bitch, Shang."
"Huh?"
She pushed him away. "The matchmaker insinuated me that I had sex with men during war and it´s not true."
"Of course not."
"If we make love tonight, it will only prove her right."
Shang replied, "But no one is going to know."
"And what if I get preagnant?"
"You cannot get pregnant when you´re still wearing half of your dress and I have my pants on."
Mulan cut him off, "Come on Shang, it´s not like you will be satisfied without the whole thing... you will ask for more eventually."
Shang nodded, she was so damn right.
Mulan sat up and put on the part of the dress she was missing .
"Goodnight Shang," she said.
"Goodnight Mulan." Shang said, " Do you think we can make love someday?"
"Yes but not now," Mulan replied, " We can do it when we are sure about it." With that she left the room and headed to her own. When she lied on her bed she sighed with relief.