1 New World
(Ow. Pain. All over. Damn Her. *notices audience* er..eh he…So you're back again. Getting hooked, eh? *evil laugh* I have complete control *another evil laugh* I, The Narrator love evil laughs *yet another evil laugh, and another, and another, and another, and one that exceeds the world record, then another* Hmm. So the last chapter was boring? Well s-o-r-r-y but I was off elsewhere. So now I'm back, lets see what chaos is in store *and for seventh time this chat, an evil laugh*)
Steffi Anderson admired herself in the shop window. New outfit, new cloak, new headband, new boots, new belt, in fact new everything visible.
"Hey, don't you just love these shoulder guards?" She asked Tori, who was also admiring herself. Tori was fitting on her headband.
"Now all I need is pointed elf ears." She said dreamily.
"You are obsessed with elves." Steffi said.
"I know."
Zelgadis was sitting on a chair trying not to exist but not really succeeding. Especially when seeing just what the girls had purchased.
"Just where did you get the money for that?" he asked. Both girls froze.
"Well," Tori began, "I managed to trade my jeans. They were pretty interested with the concept of denim. Steffi?"
"Uh? Me?" She paused, "Well I did the same thing."
Zelgadis was watching her with a disturbing calm. Steffi moved to place her hand behind her head, dropping her bag. Her original clothes fell out.
"Nice one." Tori laughed, "I told you it was unjust."
Zelgadis narrowed his eyes. "Unjust?" he felt his money pouch. It was considerably lighter then he last remembered. Steffi sweat dropped and hurriedly backed away. Where she got the idea that she could escape a demon was beyond anyone. "You little bitch!" Zelgadis yelled and lept towards her.
"Yikes!" She called out.
"Steffi, why didn't you just ask?" Tori questioned the girl who was now lying on the ground.
"His fits are made of stone." Steffi groaned.
Tori sighed, "There's a big news flash." She leant down to her friend, "Now you know what it is like."
"Hey!" Steffi complained, "I was the one who got them to help you! Xelloss was the one that attacked."
"Yeah well if you hadn't been fighting in the first place I would never had been inclined to touch that bloody staff."
"Do you two ever stop fighting?" Zelgadis asked back in his I-do-not-exist position.
"You know," Steffi thought picking herself up from the ground, "you wouldn't think we are friends."
(Yes well it would just be boring if they didn't fight. *insert evil laugh here*)
"Right." Zelgadis said in a voice that suggested he believed both belonged to the men in white.
"Any way," Tori said, "We got some weapons so next time we wouldn't be so useless in a fight." She held out her recurve bow and dagger. Steffi held out an identical bow and quarterstaff. As well as her trusty pen knife. Zelgadis was surprised that they had actually done something useful with the money. Then realization hit as he watched Steffi.
"And you plan on carrying both of those." He stated.
Steffi thought for a second. "Oh yeah. Oops."
Tori looked sideways, "Idiot." She shook her head.
"A bow and a staff?" Zelgadiss was muttering to himself trying to make sense out of this idiocy.
"What were you thinking? Any time you want to use one weapon you would have to drop the other." Tori sighed thinking of her friend's habits, "and you would end up leaving it somewhere."
"Hey shut up! Both of you!" Steffi yelled dropping both staff and bow in process.
"Just goes to prove my point." Tori made a victory sign. Steffi hit up the backside of the head. "Ow."
"Incase you haven't noticed, dope, stone boy's walked off again!" Steffi yelled in her ear. Tori frizzled to the ground. "Damn it! Why does he keep having to do that? I guess he really doesn't like us…"
Tori was hunched over and tracing a circle in the dirt with one idol finger.
Tori released the arrow. All three watched its passage through the air. It struck the selected knot in the tree trunk. Which would have been impressive if it weren't for the other ten or so arrows imbedded around it.
"Not bad." Zelgadiss congratulated. Tori gave a victory sign. Steffi, who was watching from sideline and was currently appearing very bug-eyed, took a step forward.
"Ok, my turn." She smiled, dropping her quarter staff. Both Zelgadiss and Tori shared a look.
Steffi took her ready position, notched an arrow, lifted the bow up and drew the string back to cheek. The two spectators shared another look.
"Oh please, please work." Steffi prayed to herself, releasing the arrow. It soared through the air…and landed in a root some five meters in front of her.
(You thought I would make it easy for them? Boring! He he…)
"Interesting." Zelgadiss said almost indifferent.
"Say? You didn't do those archery classes did you?" Tori asked in an attempt to cool her friend down before she had a chance to get heated up. "So don't feel bad."
"I had one lesson in PE!" Steffi yelled throwing her bow down.
"Exactly." Tori pointed out, "And I have been taking lessons for how many months now? And that is no way to treat your bow!"
"Er…sorry." She picked it up and unstrung it, then sat down on a near by and convenient rock. Zelgadiss looked to the over sized stick.
"What about your skills with that thing?"
"Well she did use that music stand against Xelloss…" Tori thought for a second. Zelgadiss rose his eyebrow in question. "Don't ask."
"Don't tell."
"Hey! You got a problem with that?" Steffi interrupted, "It just so happens that I can use a quarter staff." She snatched up the staff and held it in the ready position. "Ha! Take that you stupid tree!" She yelled and began pummeling the unfortunate target tree.
"Well that's good and all," Tori assured, "So long as you are attacking a TREE!"
"Hey, she's got the style almost right." Zelgadiss pointed out. Steffi dropped to her knees panting. "But obviously not fit."
"I say we rest for the night right here." Steffi suggested.
Surprisingly enough, they did settle down there. Zelgadiss took watch, even though it technically was not necessary and nothing the girls said would change his mind. Steffi was lying down by the camp fire that Zel had conjured, while Tori was sitting near by staring into its depth. Suddenly Steffi let out a wail.
"Ah! What is it!" Tori jumped.
"I don't have my teddy bear!" she wailed.
"God! And you had to scream like that!" Tori yelled back, "I thought we were under attack or something."
"Teddy bear?" Zel asked. Steffi blushed heavily.
"Um, nothing." Steffi tried to wave it off. Zelgadiss sighed and returned to his watch. Steffi turned to Tori and dropped her voice to a whisper. "I didn't get a chance to bring my teddy. I never go over night any where without her!"
"Yeah, tell me about it." Tori muttered. "Well you've lasted the last week without her."
"That's because I have been suffering from culture shock! I've been too busy with trying to figure what's what in this crazy world to notice." Steffi cried, "Ah! What about Shadow! My little fluffy-poochie-baby-puppy- boy! Oh yeah, and my parents and that annoying twerp of a brother."
(For those of you who don't know, which is all of you I might add, Shadow is Steffi's dog, a white obidient Samoyds. Oh, and Tori happens to have a gray Husky.)
Tori watched for a second, then also cried out. "Fang! What about Fang!"
"Gee you two care about your families a lot." Zelgadiss noted.
"Don't even get me started on my family." Tori warned. Zel turned his back on them. "Oh yeah, sorry there Zel."
"Real sensitive." Steffi whistled. She made a peace sign. "I always wanted to say that back at you."
Tori also turned away. "Its not like I don't care about mum and dad… its… just…"
"Well between adoptive parents, murderous grandparents and work obsessed fools, I guess we make a great family bunch." Steffi attempted to lighten the scene a bit. It failed. "Say, Zel why don't you tell us where we heading?"
Steffi realized that neither were listening. Tori was walking in one direction, and Zelgadiss in the other. "Well fine then. I'll go sulk about been neglected." And so Steffi headed off in yet another direction.
Thirty minuets latter they were all around the fire again, asleep.
(Who's one for mushy scenes?)
The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and it was only five in the morning. Hence, our heroes were asleep, and enjoying it too.
"Oh my, what do we have here?"
Steffi tossed in her sleep. Somewhere in the land between awake and asleep she had a horrible feeling that the voice was genuine and not result of any dream.
"Hmm, all asleep and no guard. I would have thought more of Zelgadiss."
Steffi screwed closed her eyes trying to will herself to be asleep and let it all just be a dream.
"Ah yes, if it isn't my dear music-stand-swinging friend. Steffi, wasn't it?"
This time she could not ignore it. Dreading it with every bone in her body she opened her eyes, to be staring right into a pair of purple eyes at rather close range. Needless to say, she screamed.
Neither Tori or Zel moved. Although while Tori was sprawled out like one usual is when they sleep, Zel was hunched up in a position that resembled a ball with his back to them.
"Good morning!" Xelloss greeted.
"What the *beep* are you doing here?" Steffi exclaimed.
"Why I just happened to be passing by when what should I see-" The Trickster Priest began.
"You don't expect me to believe that, Xelloss?" Steffi asked rubbing her head. Xelloss stood upright looking down at the trio and their ashes that resembled last night's campfire.
"And who do we have here?" He asked inspecting Tori, "I think I remember her, can't think where." He rubbed his chin in thought.
"Oh give me a brake." Steffi slapped her forehead. "Er…ug Tori, now would be a good time to wake up."
Xelloss smiled. "Are you asleep?"
"Yes." Came a rather annoyed and disgruntled reply.
"Ah, then you won't mind me doing this." He bent down and pecked her on the cheek. This brought Tori up in a flash, and with very scarlet cheeks too.
"You little hentai!" She yelled, taking hold of a near by arrow. Unlike Steffi though, she dropped it and rubbed her cheek. "Oh man I got to wash my face now."
"Hey, think of it this way Tori." Steffi pointed out, "There are plenty of fans who would die just to receive that."
Xelloss was standing quite comfortably surveying again.
"Baka ga!?" Tori yelled.
"Er, ii-e!" Steffi replied, then turned to face Xelloss "But while we are on the Japanese, Naze omio kuku ni?"
The Mazoku winked, "Sore wa, himitsu desu."
(Japanese leasson number two…or is it three? Oh well, what the heck. Basicly Tori asked 'Are you stupid' to which Steffi replied with 'No.' She then asked Xelloss 'What are you doing here?' and we all know his answer ^.^)
"But there is one more person not yet awake." Xelloss remarked.
"I don't need waking thank you very much." Zelgadiss assured him sitting up rather reluctantly.
"Oh Zelly, you didn't think I wouldn't notice you all curled up there like a little caterpillar." Xelloss teased.
"A carterpillar?" Tori asked. Xelloss took a step toward Zelgadiss, in the process 'accidentally' trodding on Tori's hand.
"Ow! Just what did you do that for you stupid namagumi?"
"Oh sorry. Didn't see your hand there."
"Sure. Right. What ever you say fruitcake."
Steffi scratched her chin, "I guess he still holds a grudge."
"Enough." Zelgadiss broke their reunion up. "Now Xelloss would you just mind giving us a reason for your presence."
"Not at all Zelly-chan. But I don't think you will like what I have to say." Xelloss smiled.
"Oh the suspense is killing me." Tori groaned.
"Oh do tell. We are all dying to here." Steffi said sarcastically.
"Now that, is a secret!" The Mazoku grinned.
"My bad." Zel admitted.
(Just can't have enough of that Xelloss! So now you ask where the hell is this going? Well now that, and to quote once more, is a secret. Just can't get enough of that Xelloss. Hmm, I think I'm going on a high. I didn't think that was physically possible. Oh dear, I've already given away too many hints this chapter. Er…right! Cliché: So what is Xelloss doing and back? Is Tori homesick? Is Steffi? Will Steffi learn to use a bow? And what about poor Zelgadis? How will he cope? He won't, he won't, he won't *trails off in evil thoughts and teasing, but no evil laughs* ^.-)
(Ow. Pain. All over. Damn Her. *notices audience* er..eh he…So you're back again. Getting hooked, eh? *evil laugh* I have complete control *another evil laugh* I, The Narrator love evil laughs *yet another evil laugh, and another, and another, and another, and one that exceeds the world record, then another* Hmm. So the last chapter was boring? Well s-o-r-r-y but I was off elsewhere. So now I'm back, lets see what chaos is in store *and for seventh time this chat, an evil laugh*)
Steffi Anderson admired herself in the shop window. New outfit, new cloak, new headband, new boots, new belt, in fact new everything visible.
"Hey, don't you just love these shoulder guards?" She asked Tori, who was also admiring herself. Tori was fitting on her headband.
"Now all I need is pointed elf ears." She said dreamily.
"You are obsessed with elves." Steffi said.
"I know."
Zelgadis was sitting on a chair trying not to exist but not really succeeding. Especially when seeing just what the girls had purchased.
"Just where did you get the money for that?" he asked. Both girls froze.
"Well," Tori began, "I managed to trade my jeans. They were pretty interested with the concept of denim. Steffi?"
"Uh? Me?" She paused, "Well I did the same thing."
Zelgadis was watching her with a disturbing calm. Steffi moved to place her hand behind her head, dropping her bag. Her original clothes fell out.
"Nice one." Tori laughed, "I told you it was unjust."
Zelgadis narrowed his eyes. "Unjust?" he felt his money pouch. It was considerably lighter then he last remembered. Steffi sweat dropped and hurriedly backed away. Where she got the idea that she could escape a demon was beyond anyone. "You little bitch!" Zelgadis yelled and lept towards her.
"Yikes!" She called out.
"Steffi, why didn't you just ask?" Tori questioned the girl who was now lying on the ground.
"His fits are made of stone." Steffi groaned.
Tori sighed, "There's a big news flash." She leant down to her friend, "Now you know what it is like."
"Hey!" Steffi complained, "I was the one who got them to help you! Xelloss was the one that attacked."
"Yeah well if you hadn't been fighting in the first place I would never had been inclined to touch that bloody staff."
"Do you two ever stop fighting?" Zelgadis asked back in his I-do-not-exist position.
"You know," Steffi thought picking herself up from the ground, "you wouldn't think we are friends."
(Yes well it would just be boring if they didn't fight. *insert evil laugh here*)
"Right." Zelgadis said in a voice that suggested he believed both belonged to the men in white.
"Any way," Tori said, "We got some weapons so next time we wouldn't be so useless in a fight." She held out her recurve bow and dagger. Steffi held out an identical bow and quarterstaff. As well as her trusty pen knife. Zelgadis was surprised that they had actually done something useful with the money. Then realization hit as he watched Steffi.
"And you plan on carrying both of those." He stated.
Steffi thought for a second. "Oh yeah. Oops."
Tori looked sideways, "Idiot." She shook her head.
"A bow and a staff?" Zelgadiss was muttering to himself trying to make sense out of this idiocy.
"What were you thinking? Any time you want to use one weapon you would have to drop the other." Tori sighed thinking of her friend's habits, "and you would end up leaving it somewhere."
"Hey shut up! Both of you!" Steffi yelled dropping both staff and bow in process.
"Just goes to prove my point." Tori made a victory sign. Steffi hit up the backside of the head. "Ow."
"Incase you haven't noticed, dope, stone boy's walked off again!" Steffi yelled in her ear. Tori frizzled to the ground. "Damn it! Why does he keep having to do that? I guess he really doesn't like us…"
Tori was hunched over and tracing a circle in the dirt with one idol finger.
Tori released the arrow. All three watched its passage through the air. It struck the selected knot in the tree trunk. Which would have been impressive if it weren't for the other ten or so arrows imbedded around it.
"Not bad." Zelgadiss congratulated. Tori gave a victory sign. Steffi, who was watching from sideline and was currently appearing very bug-eyed, took a step forward.
"Ok, my turn." She smiled, dropping her quarter staff. Both Zelgadiss and Tori shared a look.
Steffi took her ready position, notched an arrow, lifted the bow up and drew the string back to cheek. The two spectators shared another look.
"Oh please, please work." Steffi prayed to herself, releasing the arrow. It soared through the air…and landed in a root some five meters in front of her.
(You thought I would make it easy for them? Boring! He he…)
"Interesting." Zelgadiss said almost indifferent.
"Say? You didn't do those archery classes did you?" Tori asked in an attempt to cool her friend down before she had a chance to get heated up. "So don't feel bad."
"I had one lesson in PE!" Steffi yelled throwing her bow down.
"Exactly." Tori pointed out, "And I have been taking lessons for how many months now? And that is no way to treat your bow!"
"Er…sorry." She picked it up and unstrung it, then sat down on a near by and convenient rock. Zelgadiss looked to the over sized stick.
"What about your skills with that thing?"
"Well she did use that music stand against Xelloss…" Tori thought for a second. Zelgadiss rose his eyebrow in question. "Don't ask."
"Don't tell."
"Hey! You got a problem with that?" Steffi interrupted, "It just so happens that I can use a quarter staff." She snatched up the staff and held it in the ready position. "Ha! Take that you stupid tree!" She yelled and began pummeling the unfortunate target tree.
"Well that's good and all," Tori assured, "So long as you are attacking a TREE!"
"Hey, she's got the style almost right." Zelgadiss pointed out. Steffi dropped to her knees panting. "But obviously not fit."
"I say we rest for the night right here." Steffi suggested.
Surprisingly enough, they did settle down there. Zelgadiss took watch, even though it technically was not necessary and nothing the girls said would change his mind. Steffi was lying down by the camp fire that Zel had conjured, while Tori was sitting near by staring into its depth. Suddenly Steffi let out a wail.
"Ah! What is it!" Tori jumped.
"I don't have my teddy bear!" she wailed.
"God! And you had to scream like that!" Tori yelled back, "I thought we were under attack or something."
"Teddy bear?" Zel asked. Steffi blushed heavily.
"Um, nothing." Steffi tried to wave it off. Zelgadiss sighed and returned to his watch. Steffi turned to Tori and dropped her voice to a whisper. "I didn't get a chance to bring my teddy. I never go over night any where without her!"
"Yeah, tell me about it." Tori muttered. "Well you've lasted the last week without her."
"That's because I have been suffering from culture shock! I've been too busy with trying to figure what's what in this crazy world to notice." Steffi cried, "Ah! What about Shadow! My little fluffy-poochie-baby-puppy- boy! Oh yeah, and my parents and that annoying twerp of a brother."
(For those of you who don't know, which is all of you I might add, Shadow is Steffi's dog, a white obidient Samoyds. Oh, and Tori happens to have a gray Husky.)
Tori watched for a second, then also cried out. "Fang! What about Fang!"
"Gee you two care about your families a lot." Zelgadiss noted.
"Don't even get me started on my family." Tori warned. Zel turned his back on them. "Oh yeah, sorry there Zel."
"Real sensitive." Steffi whistled. She made a peace sign. "I always wanted to say that back at you."
Tori also turned away. "Its not like I don't care about mum and dad… its… just…"
"Well between adoptive parents, murderous grandparents and work obsessed fools, I guess we make a great family bunch." Steffi attempted to lighten the scene a bit. It failed. "Say, Zel why don't you tell us where we heading?"
Steffi realized that neither were listening. Tori was walking in one direction, and Zelgadiss in the other. "Well fine then. I'll go sulk about been neglected." And so Steffi headed off in yet another direction.
Thirty minuets latter they were all around the fire again, asleep.
(Who's one for mushy scenes?)
The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and it was only five in the morning. Hence, our heroes were asleep, and enjoying it too.
"Oh my, what do we have here?"
Steffi tossed in her sleep. Somewhere in the land between awake and asleep she had a horrible feeling that the voice was genuine and not result of any dream.
"Hmm, all asleep and no guard. I would have thought more of Zelgadiss."
Steffi screwed closed her eyes trying to will herself to be asleep and let it all just be a dream.
"Ah yes, if it isn't my dear music-stand-swinging friend. Steffi, wasn't it?"
This time she could not ignore it. Dreading it with every bone in her body she opened her eyes, to be staring right into a pair of purple eyes at rather close range. Needless to say, she screamed.
Neither Tori or Zel moved. Although while Tori was sprawled out like one usual is when they sleep, Zel was hunched up in a position that resembled a ball with his back to them.
"Good morning!" Xelloss greeted.
"What the *beep* are you doing here?" Steffi exclaimed.
"Why I just happened to be passing by when what should I see-" The Trickster Priest began.
"You don't expect me to believe that, Xelloss?" Steffi asked rubbing her head. Xelloss stood upright looking down at the trio and their ashes that resembled last night's campfire.
"And who do we have here?" He asked inspecting Tori, "I think I remember her, can't think where." He rubbed his chin in thought.
"Oh give me a brake." Steffi slapped her forehead. "Er…ug Tori, now would be a good time to wake up."
Xelloss smiled. "Are you asleep?"
"Yes." Came a rather annoyed and disgruntled reply.
"Ah, then you won't mind me doing this." He bent down and pecked her on the cheek. This brought Tori up in a flash, and with very scarlet cheeks too.
"You little hentai!" She yelled, taking hold of a near by arrow. Unlike Steffi though, she dropped it and rubbed her cheek. "Oh man I got to wash my face now."
"Hey, think of it this way Tori." Steffi pointed out, "There are plenty of fans who would die just to receive that."
Xelloss was standing quite comfortably surveying again.
"Baka ga!?" Tori yelled.
"Er, ii-e!" Steffi replied, then turned to face Xelloss "But while we are on the Japanese, Naze omio kuku ni?"
The Mazoku winked, "Sore wa, himitsu desu."
(Japanese leasson number two…or is it three? Oh well, what the heck. Basicly Tori asked 'Are you stupid' to which Steffi replied with 'No.' She then asked Xelloss 'What are you doing here?' and we all know his answer ^.^)
"But there is one more person not yet awake." Xelloss remarked.
"I don't need waking thank you very much." Zelgadiss assured him sitting up rather reluctantly.
"Oh Zelly, you didn't think I wouldn't notice you all curled up there like a little caterpillar." Xelloss teased.
"A carterpillar?" Tori asked. Xelloss took a step toward Zelgadiss, in the process 'accidentally' trodding on Tori's hand.
"Ow! Just what did you do that for you stupid namagumi?"
"Oh sorry. Didn't see your hand there."
"Sure. Right. What ever you say fruitcake."
Steffi scratched her chin, "I guess he still holds a grudge."
"Enough." Zelgadiss broke their reunion up. "Now Xelloss would you just mind giving us a reason for your presence."
"Not at all Zelly-chan. But I don't think you will like what I have to say." Xelloss smiled.
"Oh the suspense is killing me." Tori groaned.
"Oh do tell. We are all dying to here." Steffi said sarcastically.
"Now that, is a secret!" The Mazoku grinned.
"My bad." Zel admitted.
(Just can't have enough of that Xelloss! So now you ask where the hell is this going? Well now that, and to quote once more, is a secret. Just can't get enough of that Xelloss. Hmm, I think I'm going on a high. I didn't think that was physically possible. Oh dear, I've already given away too many hints this chapter. Er…right! Cliché: So what is Xelloss doing and back? Is Tori homesick? Is Steffi? Will Steffi learn to use a bow? And what about poor Zelgadis? How will he cope? He won't, he won't, he won't *trails off in evil thoughts and teasing, but no evil laughs* ^.-)