Title: Musie goes to San Diego
Author: Darien's Muse
Rating: PG
Summary: The story of what would happen if your very own Musie suddenly ended up in the I-Man universe. In response to a fic challenge.
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone in this story, except Musie. She's me. :)
Author's Note: This was intended to be a very short story, and I knew from the start exactly where it had to go, but the boys just wouldn't let me get there! *g* Not that I mind, though, it was lots fun to write!
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Musie goes to San Diego
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I opened my eyes, and quickly closed them again. I groaned. I did not want to wake up to this kind of light. Then I felt a hand on my arm, and I slowly opened my eyes again. A face came into focus, a face that was somehow very familiar, but my foggy brain couldn't figure out who it was. Then it hit me, with all the force of an oncoming truck. Vince! I sat up with a start, wide-eyed, completely awake now. My mouth opened and closed without a sound.
"Hey, hey, easy there, you're safe," said the voice I knew so well.
I looked around me. They were all here, Vince, Paul, and Shannon. What's more, it looked like I was in the Keep, and I was in the Demented Dentist Chair. And they were all in costume: Shannon in Claire's blue lab coat, Paul in a nice jacket like Bobby Hobbes, and Vince in one of the most wonderfully god awful Darien outfits I'd ever seen. But something wasn't quite right. Then I realized what was missing.
"W-where are the cameras?" My voice sounded small and shaky.
"Cameras?" said Paul. "What are you talking about?"
"Well, y-you know... the cameras!" I said, looking around me. I was starting to get confused. It didn't look like a movie set, yet I knew it had to be. How else could I explain this?
"I can assure you, kid, no cameras here. Nobody's watching us. Not while Bobby Hobbes is on the job!"
I was hit by a truck once again.
"W-what did you just say?"
"There's no cameras here, kid, you don't have to worry about a thing," said Paul.
"N-no, I meant... What's your name?" This was getting creepy. They were acting, in character, right now?
"Bobby Hobbes, ma'am, at your service," said Paul with a slight bow.
"And I'm Darien Fawkes," said Vince.
I turned to Shannon. "You must be Claire then."
Shannon looked surprised. "How do you know my name?"
"Uhh, well, because I'm a fan, maybe?" I knew it sounded stupid even as I said it, but I really didn't know what else to say.
"What do you mean, a fan?" came Vince's voice from the other side. I turned to him.
"Well, you know, an Imaniac!"
"Imaniac? What's that?"
All three of them looked genuinely confused, and for a moment I started doubting if they were really acting. But then I remembered that they were professional actors, after all, and decided to play along a little.
"You mean to say you don't know?"
"No, should I?"
"They're your official unofficial fan club!"
"We have a fan club?"
"We can't have a fan club, we're a top secret agency!" exclaimed Paul.
"Well, not that top secret," Vince said in reply, "I mean, look at all the people that know about us: CIA, FBI, every other alphabet agency in the government, the president, not to mention Chrysalis..."
"Yeah, but they're not exactly a fan club, are they?" Paul shot back.
"Guys, will you stop it, please!" said Shannon, sounding exasperated. I smiled, they were really good at this. For a moment it was just like watching an episode. But then I remembered the strangeness of the situation. This was way too realistic.
"Yeah... stop it. All of you. You're creeping me out here." I said.
"Stop what?" said Vince, giving me one of his Innocent Darien Puppy Dog looks.
"That. The acting. I mean, it was fun, but it's really starting to get creepy here."
"What acting? Bobby Hobbes doesn't act, my friend."
They were all so serious. It was really getting strange now. Then a small light bulb sparked in my mind, indicating a tiny idea of what could be going on. But that couldn't be true, it was too strange!
"This is real, isn't it? No acts, no dream, you really are Darien, aren't you?" I quietly said to Vince...no, to Darien.
"Er, yes..." he replied, still confused. But I really needed no answer to know that it was true.
"Oh my god..." I whispered. This was just too strange for words. I had ended up in the I-Man universe! It sounded like something from Star Trek; I was half expecting Q to flash into existence and sarcastically applaud my newfound understanding.
I looked from Darien, to Hobbes, to Claire, who was looking at me worriedly.
"Are you sure you're alright?" she asked me.
"Uh, yeah..." I said distractedly, thinking of how to explain. "This, er, this might sound strange, but, er... this is not my universe..."
"We know," said Claire simply.
"You know?" Now it was my turn to be completely confused.
"Yeah," said Hobbes, "we were after Chrysalis' newest invention, some kind of dimensional transporter, and just when we got there, they activated it and there was this huge big flash of light and there you were," he explained.
Darien continued: "You were unconscious, so after we got rid of those mooks..."
"You mean after I got rid of those mooks, you were doing nothing but getting your ass kicked, as per usual!" Hobbes interjected.
"Yeah, whatever," said Darien, "So anyway, we decided to take you back to the Keep here to see if you were alright."
"Chrysalis brought me here?" I asked.
"Yes," Claire replied, "You were apparently their first test subject for transport from another dimension to our own. Fascinating... I would love to run some tests to determine if the people in your dimension are in any way different from the people here..."
"Claire..." Darien interrupted, "What is it with you and turning people into lab rats? I mean, come on, she's just been kidnapped from her own dimension, give the girl a break here!"
I shot a thankful look to Darien, then turned back to Claire and said: "I know how interesting this must be, I'm into science myself, but I really just want to know..." I trailed off as the thought formed in my head and I realized what it would mean if the answer was no.
"...Can I go home?" I looked from Claire to Hobbes to Darien. Darien answered.
"Sure you can. We managed to recover the machine itself, and as soon as Claire figures out how to work it, we'll send you home, safe and sound." He gave me an encouraging smile.
"Yeah, kid, no worries. You'll be fine," Hobbes reassured me.
I looked at Claire. "How close are you to figuring it out?"
"Very close. It's not that complicated, and with Eberts helping me, we should be finished within a day or so."
"Ah yes, Eberts," I said, "almost forgot about him. File clerk and hacker extraordinaire."
Then Hobbes asked the question that had been in their minds from the moment I identified Claire.
"How do you know all this?"
"Yeah," said Darien, "that's what I've been wondering. I mean, you're not even from our dimension!"
"Well," I began, "You see, in my dimension... you're a TV show."
Now it was their turn to be perplexed. Darien was the first to move again. He grinned. "Cool."
Claire was also amused, Hobbes was curious. "So, tell us about it! Is it popular?" Claire rolled her eyes at this question, but kept grinning.
"Well, it's not on one of the big networks, but it was the second best show on the channel it was on, with pretty good ratings."
"Cool!" Darien grinned proudly.
"Yeah..." A sad look crossed my face then. "But now it's cancelled."
Darien's grin disappeared. "Cancelled? As in, they quit?"
"Yeah."
"They cancelled us." Hobbes looked hurt. "How dare they!" he exclaimed. Claire just sadly shook her head.
"Oh, everyone who worked on it would love to continue," I said, "but some... big shot high up decided it had to be cancelled." I tried to keep the venom out of my words, even if I couldn't keep it out of my voice.
"And exactly why was it cancelled, if it got such good ratings?" Claire inquired.
"Nobody really knows..." I sighed. "Some people have said it was because of the ratings, but that's nonsense because they were good. Some have said that it was because it was too expensive to make, but that's nonsense because the network just bought a series for twice as much as they spent on I-Man and they don't even know if that's gonna be a success. And some people..."
"Whoa, whoa, wait a minute there, 'I-Man'?" Darien interrupted my narrative.
"Yeah, that's our nickname for the show." I clarified.
Hobbes chuckled. "I've used that one myself on occasion," he clarified.
"I know," I said. "I've seen all the episodes. My favorite has to be Ralph, that was such a sweet story. Or Flowers For Hobbes, seeing Hobbes go nuts with that genius virus, then Darien risking his life for him... Oh, and Germ Theory, with the invisible bacteria, the end to that was so funny! And Immaterial Girl, with Darien seeing the invisible pink lights..." I trailed off, seeing the perplexed looks on their faces. "Oh, I'm sorry, I..."
"No, no, that's alright," said Claire, "It's just..."
"I remember all that stuff," said Darien.
"Really?" I asked him.
"Yeah, all of what you just said. It was all... yeah, the invisible bacteria... and with that awful mayo..." Darien said thoughtfully, "Hobbes going nuts... Not the only time he went nuts though, he did it once in a post office too," he added.
"I know!" I exclaimed, "Another of my favorites! The one with the musical Christmas card, right?"
"Yeah, yeah, exactly!" said Darien.
"Okay," said Hobbes, "This is freaking me out here. How did those guys over there know exactly what we were doing? I mean, you didn't know about us here, did you?" He looked around suspiciously, as if looking for hidden cameras.
"No..." I said, "It is kinda strange... Wow, so not only do you guys really exist, the series follows your lives more accurately than I ever would have expected."
"This is incredible," said Claire enthusiastically, "So we have doubles in your universe, but they're not really us, they're just actors hired to play us. Incredible."
Darien grinned, "Yeah, and apparently they were doing a pretty good job, we were pretty popular!"
"You still are," I hastened to correct him, "Even though the series is cancelled, the fan club still gets new members every day. And not just from America either. I myself am from Holland."
Darien blinked. "And that is where exactly?"
Claire rolled her eyes and sighed. "That's in Europe, Darien."
"I knew that."
I grinned. "Sure you did, Darien."
"Yeah, I did. What, you don't believe me now?"
"Yeah well, I would have believed you, if you hadn't just outright asked where it was. Besides, you're a lousy liar anyway." I couldn't help it.
"Hey, hey there, I'll have you know I used to be a professional liar, I was a thief, you know."
"Yeah, I know. And to be honest, you sucked as a thief, Darien. Though I have to say you do look good in black." I winked at him. Darien opened his mouth for a snappy comeback, but he was interrupted by Hobbes.
"Don't try, Fawkes," Hobbes chuckled, "She's as sharp as I am!"
"Yeah, I noticed," Darien said dryly. I couldn't help but giggle. This was so surreal. Like I had landed right smack in the middle of an episode. Which I had, in a way. And that thought brought me back to the matter at hand. I looked at Claire.
"So, you'll have the machine ready tomorrow?" I asked her.
"Yes, it will take a lot longer to actually discover how it works, but we should be able to figure out how to work the controls on it in a day or so," she answered.
"Good." I turned to Darien, a grin appearing on my face once more. "You're not busy, are you?"
"Er, no. Why?" he asked, getting a little suspicious at my widening grin.
"Well then," I grinned, "since this is the only chance I will ever get to do this, will you take me on a tour of San Diego, quicksilver style?"
"You mean, you want me to quicksilver you?" He seemed a little unsure whether he should do it or not.
"Yeah. I mean, all of us fans, we've all been wondering what it's like to be quicksilvered. Now's my chance to find out! Will you do it? Please?" I turned it up a notch, pulling out my own version of the Puppy Dog eyes. Which cause Hobbes to chuckle.
"Oh, I see she's got your eyes there, my friend," he said, "Now you'll have to do it!"
Darien smiled, "Yeah, how can I resist that? Okay, come on, let's go!" I jumped off the chair and followed Darien to the door. Hobbes followed me.
"I'll stay here if you don't mind," said Claire, "I've got work to do."
"Okay, Claire, see you later!" said Darien.
"Seeya Claire!" Hobbes added.
"Bye Claire," I said. As we walked out the door, I turned to Hobbes.
"So you think I got his eyes down? Well, that's not all. I can imitate him to a tee!"
"Really?" said Hobbes and Darien looked intrigued.
"Yeah. There was this once at a costume party when I fooled everyone into thinking I was the real thing. That is, until they figured out I wasn't tall enough," I said with a wide grin.
Darien and Hobbes laughed. "That's so cool!" said Darien.
I laughed too, "You have no idea!"
Then Hobbes said: "Hey, I don't think you ever told us your name."
I paused for a moment, then smiled: "Call me Musie."
The End.
Author: Darien's Muse
Rating: PG
Summary: The story of what would happen if your very own Musie suddenly ended up in the I-Man universe. In response to a fic challenge.
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone in this story, except Musie. She's me. :)
Author's Note: This was intended to be a very short story, and I knew from the start exactly where it had to go, but the boys just wouldn't let me get there! *g* Not that I mind, though, it was lots fun to write!
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Musie goes to San Diego
---
I opened my eyes, and quickly closed them again. I groaned. I did not want to wake up to this kind of light. Then I felt a hand on my arm, and I slowly opened my eyes again. A face came into focus, a face that was somehow very familiar, but my foggy brain couldn't figure out who it was. Then it hit me, with all the force of an oncoming truck. Vince! I sat up with a start, wide-eyed, completely awake now. My mouth opened and closed without a sound.
"Hey, hey, easy there, you're safe," said the voice I knew so well.
I looked around me. They were all here, Vince, Paul, and Shannon. What's more, it looked like I was in the Keep, and I was in the Demented Dentist Chair. And they were all in costume: Shannon in Claire's blue lab coat, Paul in a nice jacket like Bobby Hobbes, and Vince in one of the most wonderfully god awful Darien outfits I'd ever seen. But something wasn't quite right. Then I realized what was missing.
"W-where are the cameras?" My voice sounded small and shaky.
"Cameras?" said Paul. "What are you talking about?"
"Well, y-you know... the cameras!" I said, looking around me. I was starting to get confused. It didn't look like a movie set, yet I knew it had to be. How else could I explain this?
"I can assure you, kid, no cameras here. Nobody's watching us. Not while Bobby Hobbes is on the job!"
I was hit by a truck once again.
"W-what did you just say?"
"There's no cameras here, kid, you don't have to worry about a thing," said Paul.
"N-no, I meant... What's your name?" This was getting creepy. They were acting, in character, right now?
"Bobby Hobbes, ma'am, at your service," said Paul with a slight bow.
"And I'm Darien Fawkes," said Vince.
I turned to Shannon. "You must be Claire then."
Shannon looked surprised. "How do you know my name?"
"Uhh, well, because I'm a fan, maybe?" I knew it sounded stupid even as I said it, but I really didn't know what else to say.
"What do you mean, a fan?" came Vince's voice from the other side. I turned to him.
"Well, you know, an Imaniac!"
"Imaniac? What's that?"
All three of them looked genuinely confused, and for a moment I started doubting if they were really acting. But then I remembered that they were professional actors, after all, and decided to play along a little.
"You mean to say you don't know?"
"No, should I?"
"They're your official unofficial fan club!"
"We have a fan club?"
"We can't have a fan club, we're a top secret agency!" exclaimed Paul.
"Well, not that top secret," Vince said in reply, "I mean, look at all the people that know about us: CIA, FBI, every other alphabet agency in the government, the president, not to mention Chrysalis..."
"Yeah, but they're not exactly a fan club, are they?" Paul shot back.
"Guys, will you stop it, please!" said Shannon, sounding exasperated. I smiled, they were really good at this. For a moment it was just like watching an episode. But then I remembered the strangeness of the situation. This was way too realistic.
"Yeah... stop it. All of you. You're creeping me out here." I said.
"Stop what?" said Vince, giving me one of his Innocent Darien Puppy Dog looks.
"That. The acting. I mean, it was fun, but it's really starting to get creepy here."
"What acting? Bobby Hobbes doesn't act, my friend."
They were all so serious. It was really getting strange now. Then a small light bulb sparked in my mind, indicating a tiny idea of what could be going on. But that couldn't be true, it was too strange!
"This is real, isn't it? No acts, no dream, you really are Darien, aren't you?" I quietly said to Vince...no, to Darien.
"Er, yes..." he replied, still confused. But I really needed no answer to know that it was true.
"Oh my god..." I whispered. This was just too strange for words. I had ended up in the I-Man universe! It sounded like something from Star Trek; I was half expecting Q to flash into existence and sarcastically applaud my newfound understanding.
I looked from Darien, to Hobbes, to Claire, who was looking at me worriedly.
"Are you sure you're alright?" she asked me.
"Uh, yeah..." I said distractedly, thinking of how to explain. "This, er, this might sound strange, but, er... this is not my universe..."
"We know," said Claire simply.
"You know?" Now it was my turn to be completely confused.
"Yeah," said Hobbes, "we were after Chrysalis' newest invention, some kind of dimensional transporter, and just when we got there, they activated it and there was this huge big flash of light and there you were," he explained.
Darien continued: "You were unconscious, so after we got rid of those mooks..."
"You mean after I got rid of those mooks, you were doing nothing but getting your ass kicked, as per usual!" Hobbes interjected.
"Yeah, whatever," said Darien, "So anyway, we decided to take you back to the Keep here to see if you were alright."
"Chrysalis brought me here?" I asked.
"Yes," Claire replied, "You were apparently their first test subject for transport from another dimension to our own. Fascinating... I would love to run some tests to determine if the people in your dimension are in any way different from the people here..."
"Claire..." Darien interrupted, "What is it with you and turning people into lab rats? I mean, come on, she's just been kidnapped from her own dimension, give the girl a break here!"
I shot a thankful look to Darien, then turned back to Claire and said: "I know how interesting this must be, I'm into science myself, but I really just want to know..." I trailed off as the thought formed in my head and I realized what it would mean if the answer was no.
"...Can I go home?" I looked from Claire to Hobbes to Darien. Darien answered.
"Sure you can. We managed to recover the machine itself, and as soon as Claire figures out how to work it, we'll send you home, safe and sound." He gave me an encouraging smile.
"Yeah, kid, no worries. You'll be fine," Hobbes reassured me.
I looked at Claire. "How close are you to figuring it out?"
"Very close. It's not that complicated, and with Eberts helping me, we should be finished within a day or so."
"Ah yes, Eberts," I said, "almost forgot about him. File clerk and hacker extraordinaire."
Then Hobbes asked the question that had been in their minds from the moment I identified Claire.
"How do you know all this?"
"Yeah," said Darien, "that's what I've been wondering. I mean, you're not even from our dimension!"
"Well," I began, "You see, in my dimension... you're a TV show."
Now it was their turn to be perplexed. Darien was the first to move again. He grinned. "Cool."
Claire was also amused, Hobbes was curious. "So, tell us about it! Is it popular?" Claire rolled her eyes at this question, but kept grinning.
"Well, it's not on one of the big networks, but it was the second best show on the channel it was on, with pretty good ratings."
"Cool!" Darien grinned proudly.
"Yeah..." A sad look crossed my face then. "But now it's cancelled."
Darien's grin disappeared. "Cancelled? As in, they quit?"
"Yeah."
"They cancelled us." Hobbes looked hurt. "How dare they!" he exclaimed. Claire just sadly shook her head.
"Oh, everyone who worked on it would love to continue," I said, "but some... big shot high up decided it had to be cancelled." I tried to keep the venom out of my words, even if I couldn't keep it out of my voice.
"And exactly why was it cancelled, if it got such good ratings?" Claire inquired.
"Nobody really knows..." I sighed. "Some people have said it was because of the ratings, but that's nonsense because they were good. Some have said that it was because it was too expensive to make, but that's nonsense because the network just bought a series for twice as much as they spent on I-Man and they don't even know if that's gonna be a success. And some people..."
"Whoa, whoa, wait a minute there, 'I-Man'?" Darien interrupted my narrative.
"Yeah, that's our nickname for the show." I clarified.
Hobbes chuckled. "I've used that one myself on occasion," he clarified.
"I know," I said. "I've seen all the episodes. My favorite has to be Ralph, that was such a sweet story. Or Flowers For Hobbes, seeing Hobbes go nuts with that genius virus, then Darien risking his life for him... Oh, and Germ Theory, with the invisible bacteria, the end to that was so funny! And Immaterial Girl, with Darien seeing the invisible pink lights..." I trailed off, seeing the perplexed looks on their faces. "Oh, I'm sorry, I..."
"No, no, that's alright," said Claire, "It's just..."
"I remember all that stuff," said Darien.
"Really?" I asked him.
"Yeah, all of what you just said. It was all... yeah, the invisible bacteria... and with that awful mayo..." Darien said thoughtfully, "Hobbes going nuts... Not the only time he went nuts though, he did it once in a post office too," he added.
"I know!" I exclaimed, "Another of my favorites! The one with the musical Christmas card, right?"
"Yeah, yeah, exactly!" said Darien.
"Okay," said Hobbes, "This is freaking me out here. How did those guys over there know exactly what we were doing? I mean, you didn't know about us here, did you?" He looked around suspiciously, as if looking for hidden cameras.
"No..." I said, "It is kinda strange... Wow, so not only do you guys really exist, the series follows your lives more accurately than I ever would have expected."
"This is incredible," said Claire enthusiastically, "So we have doubles in your universe, but they're not really us, they're just actors hired to play us. Incredible."
Darien grinned, "Yeah, and apparently they were doing a pretty good job, we were pretty popular!"
"You still are," I hastened to correct him, "Even though the series is cancelled, the fan club still gets new members every day. And not just from America either. I myself am from Holland."
Darien blinked. "And that is where exactly?"
Claire rolled her eyes and sighed. "That's in Europe, Darien."
"I knew that."
I grinned. "Sure you did, Darien."
"Yeah, I did. What, you don't believe me now?"
"Yeah well, I would have believed you, if you hadn't just outright asked where it was. Besides, you're a lousy liar anyway." I couldn't help it.
"Hey, hey there, I'll have you know I used to be a professional liar, I was a thief, you know."
"Yeah, I know. And to be honest, you sucked as a thief, Darien. Though I have to say you do look good in black." I winked at him. Darien opened his mouth for a snappy comeback, but he was interrupted by Hobbes.
"Don't try, Fawkes," Hobbes chuckled, "She's as sharp as I am!"
"Yeah, I noticed," Darien said dryly. I couldn't help but giggle. This was so surreal. Like I had landed right smack in the middle of an episode. Which I had, in a way. And that thought brought me back to the matter at hand. I looked at Claire.
"So, you'll have the machine ready tomorrow?" I asked her.
"Yes, it will take a lot longer to actually discover how it works, but we should be able to figure out how to work the controls on it in a day or so," she answered.
"Good." I turned to Darien, a grin appearing on my face once more. "You're not busy, are you?"
"Er, no. Why?" he asked, getting a little suspicious at my widening grin.
"Well then," I grinned, "since this is the only chance I will ever get to do this, will you take me on a tour of San Diego, quicksilver style?"
"You mean, you want me to quicksilver you?" He seemed a little unsure whether he should do it or not.
"Yeah. I mean, all of us fans, we've all been wondering what it's like to be quicksilvered. Now's my chance to find out! Will you do it? Please?" I turned it up a notch, pulling out my own version of the Puppy Dog eyes. Which cause Hobbes to chuckle.
"Oh, I see she's got your eyes there, my friend," he said, "Now you'll have to do it!"
Darien smiled, "Yeah, how can I resist that? Okay, come on, let's go!" I jumped off the chair and followed Darien to the door. Hobbes followed me.
"I'll stay here if you don't mind," said Claire, "I've got work to do."
"Okay, Claire, see you later!" said Darien.
"Seeya Claire!" Hobbes added.
"Bye Claire," I said. As we walked out the door, I turned to Hobbes.
"So you think I got his eyes down? Well, that's not all. I can imitate him to a tee!"
"Really?" said Hobbes and Darien looked intrigued.
"Yeah. There was this once at a costume party when I fooled everyone into thinking I was the real thing. That is, until they figured out I wasn't tall enough," I said with a wide grin.
Darien and Hobbes laughed. "That's so cool!" said Darien.
I laughed too, "You have no idea!"
Then Hobbes said: "Hey, I don't think you ever told us your name."
I paused for a moment, then smiled: "Call me Musie."
The End.