Chapter 51
A WWF driver drove Jeff & Gemma to the airport. An hour later they boarded their plane in silence. Gemma felt numb. She didnt know what to do, what to think, she just sat staring out of the window not even realising how tightly she held onto Jeff's hand. Chris was gone, dead! She couldnt believe she'd never see him again...and why? Because he'd taken drugs. It wasnt an accident, it wasnt natural causes, it was damn near enough to suicide & she couldnt take it in. She tried desperately to remember the last words she'd said to him, the last time she'd seen his face, but nothing would come to her.
The plane landed. Gilbert picked them up from the airport & they drove home in silence. Once outside the farmhouse Gilbert took Gemma's cases inside leaving Gemma & Jeff outside in the yard, hand in hand. She looked up at the house & at the window to Chris's room & a sudden panick welled up inside of her. She started gasping for breath.
"Jeff...I cant...I cant......I cant......no I cant go in!" Her legs buckled beneath her & Jeff caught her before she hit the ground.
"It's ok! It's ok!" He held her tightly & she sobbed & wailed, her head burried in his chest. She could feel his strong arms around her only this time he couldnt make everything right, couldnt make her feel safe. She cried uncontrolably, all the time he held her, stroked her hair, kissed her, told her to let it all out, let go.
Eventually Michael came out of the house, his eyes red & tired. He didnt say anything. He just put his arms around them both for a while, then guided them gently towards the house.
Gemma reluctantly walked in with Jeff on one side of her & Michael on the other. Everyone was sitting around the kitchen table with much the same blank expressions on their faces. Kellie & Pat went over & hugged her. She looked over Pat's shoulder & saw her Dad.
"Dad?"
Pat shook his head. She moved him out of the way to go to her Dad but Pat grabbed her arm.
"Gem..."
She gave him a stern look. No one was going to stop her going to her Dad right now! He needed her!
She knelt down at her Dad's feet & took both of his hands in hers.
"Dad?" He looked straight through her, unaware that she was even there beside him.
"Dad?" The tears welled up in her eyes. "Dad it's me..Gemma!" She shook his hands & still nothing. She was close to screaming! "Dad! It's me! PLEASE!" Suddenly he looked at her as if seeing her for the first time.
"You've come home?"
"Yes Dad!" She cried.
"My little girl's home!" Jack said & held her. She cried her heart out in her Dads arms. How the hell were they meant to get through this?
*******
She lay in her old bed wide awake. The clock said 3am. She'd cried for most of the day, it had been a long, long day & she was physically exhausted, but her mind wouldnt rest. She decided to take a walk. She threw her robe over her pyjamas, pulled on her sneakers & went out into the yard. It was a mild night & the stars were beautiful in the black sky. She sat on the porch steps for a while just staring upwards. The door opened behind her & Rhett walked out.
"You had the same idea huh?" He said sitting down beside her & putting his arm around her shoulders. She leaned her head against him & held his other hand in hers.
"When did that happen?!" He asked pointing to her ring.
"Jesus! Id forgotten it even had happened!" she looked at the ring glistening in the moonlight. "Yesterday."
"Adam I take it?"
"Yeah." She sighed. "Its all so unimportant now!"
"Yeah I know what you mean!" He paused, "Jenny's pregnant!"
"Wow!" Gemma smiled. "Im gonna be an Auntie huh?"
"Yeah.....and Im gonna be a Dad! How whacked is that!?" He smiled.
"Have you told the others yet?"
"No, well Mike knows....Mum knows & doesnt give a shit!"
"Well mom doesnt give much of a shit about anything these days Rhett! That's what the drink does to people...makes them soul-less! I cant believe she didnt even come over!"
"You wouldnt wanna see her! Believe me! She has her toy boy, his yacht, his fucking mercades....she's, well she's fucked up & Ive given up trying to reason with her!"
Gemma sighed.
"What's happening to us all Rhett? Jesus what a mess!"
"We arent doing too bad considdering!" Said Michael sitting down on the other side of Gemma & putting a hand on her knee.
"You reckon?!" she asked.
"Yeah! You're a hot shot reporter, Rhett's gonna be a Dad! Pat's tennis is earning him big bucks! Greg's a sucessful businessman & me....well its all rock n roll baby!" He smiled.
"Yeah well it's too damn bad we were all too wrapped up in our own perfect lives to see what Chris was going through!" Gemma snapped. "I saw it Mike! Last time I was home he was a mess! I just ignored it!" The tears came again.
"Hey nobody forced him to take that shit Gemma! Man if he was to walk up that road right now Id kick his ass!"
"He wont walk up that road Rhett! He wont walk up that road....not ever!"
The three of them held onto each other & cried. The next morning Kellie found them all curled up together, asleep in each other's arms on the couch.
A WWF driver drove Jeff & Gemma to the airport. An hour later they boarded their plane in silence. Gemma felt numb. She didnt know what to do, what to think, she just sat staring out of the window not even realising how tightly she held onto Jeff's hand. Chris was gone, dead! She couldnt believe she'd never see him again...and why? Because he'd taken drugs. It wasnt an accident, it wasnt natural causes, it was damn near enough to suicide & she couldnt take it in. She tried desperately to remember the last words she'd said to him, the last time she'd seen his face, but nothing would come to her.
The plane landed. Gilbert picked them up from the airport & they drove home in silence. Once outside the farmhouse Gilbert took Gemma's cases inside leaving Gemma & Jeff outside in the yard, hand in hand. She looked up at the house & at the window to Chris's room & a sudden panick welled up inside of her. She started gasping for breath.
"Jeff...I cant...I cant......I cant......no I cant go in!" Her legs buckled beneath her & Jeff caught her before she hit the ground.
"It's ok! It's ok!" He held her tightly & she sobbed & wailed, her head burried in his chest. She could feel his strong arms around her only this time he couldnt make everything right, couldnt make her feel safe. She cried uncontrolably, all the time he held her, stroked her hair, kissed her, told her to let it all out, let go.
Eventually Michael came out of the house, his eyes red & tired. He didnt say anything. He just put his arms around them both for a while, then guided them gently towards the house.
Gemma reluctantly walked in with Jeff on one side of her & Michael on the other. Everyone was sitting around the kitchen table with much the same blank expressions on their faces. Kellie & Pat went over & hugged her. She looked over Pat's shoulder & saw her Dad.
"Dad?"
Pat shook his head. She moved him out of the way to go to her Dad but Pat grabbed her arm.
"Gem..."
She gave him a stern look. No one was going to stop her going to her Dad right now! He needed her!
She knelt down at her Dad's feet & took both of his hands in hers.
"Dad?" He looked straight through her, unaware that she was even there beside him.
"Dad?" The tears welled up in her eyes. "Dad it's me..Gemma!" She shook his hands & still nothing. She was close to screaming! "Dad! It's me! PLEASE!" Suddenly he looked at her as if seeing her for the first time.
"You've come home?"
"Yes Dad!" She cried.
"My little girl's home!" Jack said & held her. She cried her heart out in her Dads arms. How the hell were they meant to get through this?
*******
She lay in her old bed wide awake. The clock said 3am. She'd cried for most of the day, it had been a long, long day & she was physically exhausted, but her mind wouldnt rest. She decided to take a walk. She threw her robe over her pyjamas, pulled on her sneakers & went out into the yard. It was a mild night & the stars were beautiful in the black sky. She sat on the porch steps for a while just staring upwards. The door opened behind her & Rhett walked out.
"You had the same idea huh?" He said sitting down beside her & putting his arm around her shoulders. She leaned her head against him & held his other hand in hers.
"When did that happen?!" He asked pointing to her ring.
"Jesus! Id forgotten it even had happened!" she looked at the ring glistening in the moonlight. "Yesterday."
"Adam I take it?"
"Yeah." She sighed. "Its all so unimportant now!"
"Yeah I know what you mean!" He paused, "Jenny's pregnant!"
"Wow!" Gemma smiled. "Im gonna be an Auntie huh?"
"Yeah.....and Im gonna be a Dad! How whacked is that!?" He smiled.
"Have you told the others yet?"
"No, well Mike knows....Mum knows & doesnt give a shit!"
"Well mom doesnt give much of a shit about anything these days Rhett! That's what the drink does to people...makes them soul-less! I cant believe she didnt even come over!"
"You wouldnt wanna see her! Believe me! She has her toy boy, his yacht, his fucking mercades....she's, well she's fucked up & Ive given up trying to reason with her!"
Gemma sighed.
"What's happening to us all Rhett? Jesus what a mess!"
"We arent doing too bad considdering!" Said Michael sitting down on the other side of Gemma & putting a hand on her knee.
"You reckon?!" she asked.
"Yeah! You're a hot shot reporter, Rhett's gonna be a Dad! Pat's tennis is earning him big bucks! Greg's a sucessful businessman & me....well its all rock n roll baby!" He smiled.
"Yeah well it's too damn bad we were all too wrapped up in our own perfect lives to see what Chris was going through!" Gemma snapped. "I saw it Mike! Last time I was home he was a mess! I just ignored it!" The tears came again.
"Hey nobody forced him to take that shit Gemma! Man if he was to walk up that road right now Id kick his ass!"
"He wont walk up that road Rhett! He wont walk up that road....not ever!"
The three of them held onto each other & cried. The next morning Kellie found them all curled up together, asleep in each other's arms on the couch.