Mr. Miagi's Banana Factory owns nothing.
Reno: Hi ya! I am the cool and mysterious Reno! I will be able to tell your future with my magic Pokemon cards! Caller one, your name is?
Vincent: Name's Vincent Valentine. I have a problem. I'm afraid that… I might like a really annoying ninja girl that tags along with my friends and I.
Reno: Oh, a pedophile in denial. I just love calls like these! Let's see, hmmm…. The Pikachu, this is not a good sign at al my friend. It seems that you are in fact some what queer. Oh my! The Bulbasaur!
Vincent: What does this mean?!
Reno: This card indicates that I'm out of liquor!!! NNNNNOOOOOOOO!!!
Vincent: what about me? This is my call.
Reno: Huh? Oh yah. Hmmm… the Dratini. Welp, you have nothing to worry about. The cards say that you are not in love with some girl because you already have a infatuation with a man with long, silver hair.
Vincent: I'm in love with Sephiroth?!
Reno: Nope, my janitor down the hall. Thank you for calling. Now then you are?
Rufus: Ya, this is the president and I'm calling to see how much money I have.
Reno: Okay. I've pulled the Charizard, the Blastoise, and the Oddish. You should stay with wife 8 and 23 but leave 7 and 13.
Rufus: What does that have to do with my money?
Reno: I dunno. Next caller.
Tifa: Hi I'm Tifa and I want to know if *giggle* Cloud Strife likes me.
Reno: Um…there really isn't even a reason to pull out a card. Your answer is sweet and simple. No. Okay, please address yourself.
Sephiroth: Hey baby. How's your show going?
Reno: Oh, heya Sephy-pooh. All fine, so far. The Pokemon cards really DO know it all.
Sephiroth: Really? Do they know what I'm planning to do with you tonight?
*from TV room in mansion*
Rufus: I KNEW THEY WERE QUEER!!!!
*back on show*
Reno: Ya, I need to talk to a few more callers right now k.
Sephiroth: Okay, later babe.
Reno: See ya pookie. Oh wait! Can I give you a reading really fast?
Sephiroth: Okay.
Reno: Okay, I've pulled the Ivysaur, Persian, Gloom, and Pollywhirl. If I am correct, your got a pair of boxers with spirals on them and want to flaunt them in front of your boyfriend tonight. I'd suggest you don't cuz he doesn't like spirals and prefers happy faces.
Sephiroth: Oh… okay.
Reno: See ya pookie. Next and final caller.
Cloud: Ya, I've got a question. Are you queer?
Reno: Um.. Lemme check my Pokemon cards… Wait… I'm using Pokemon cards… I am queer then huh? Okay, ya, I'm queer… I never knew that though…
Cloud: Weren't you just talking about, like, doing the horizontal mombo with Spirit a few seconds ago?
Reno: AH CRAP! I'M QUEER! You know, these cards really DO know it all! I am the amazing Reno. Y'all come back now, ya hear?