Another Set of Jedi Twins

(or... Too Much Time on my Hands)

by: Lorry

Rated: G (for goofy)

Disclaimer: Ummm, nobody but me would take credit for this story, anyway, but... George Lucas owns the Star Wars galaxy, I just got a bit demented in it for a while....

This all started when my husband and I saw a package of fish in the seafood shoppe at Wal-Mart called Calamari.........

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"Another Set of Jedi Twins"

It was just an ordinary day for the pilots of the Roughy squadron. They were all fast asleep in their BBQ-Wings when the call came down from Admiral Jack Mackerel, to General Wedge Doorstop.

"General Doorstop, we've received a report of a Star Destroyer in Nova Sector. We need the BBQ-Wing pilots of the Roughy Squadron to investigate."

"No problem, Admiral Mackerel," Wedge Doorstop acknowledged. "Roughy Squadron, out."

Doorstop rubbed a hand across his face. "You hear that Roughy Nine?" he keyed the comm-port for Corran Hornhonker's BBQ-Wing.

"Loud and clear, General. Roughy squadron preparing for blast off."

"Blast off?"

"Never mind."

Deep in space over Nova Sector, the enemy ship was spotted. The BBQ-Wings slipped into battle formation, R2RNOT astromech droids squealing with anticipation. None of them had seen a Star Destroyer since the defeat of Grand Admiral Spawn. Or was that the defeat of the impostor Grand Admiral Spawn, or maybe the clone? None of them remembered for sure.

"All right, Yodeler, calm down," Corran Hornhonker told his droid. "I'm gonna need your help with these motivators, and keep an eye on the hyper-drive, for me."

Yodeler yodeled a response and Hornhonker read it as it rolled across his screen. "Sheesh, Yodeler, three expletive deleted symbols... What's the deal?"

Yodeler had no time to respond, as General Doorstop's voice crackled over the comm. "Roughy Nine, this is Roughy Leader. Have you taken a look at the approaching enemy ship?"

Hornhonker let his eyes drift from the BBQ-Wing's comm-port to the Star Destroyer advancing on Roughy Squadron, only slightly irritated at Doorstop for singling him out.

"Look, Wedge, I thought I explained that I'd rather leave my... ahhhh....gifts...out of this."

"Come on Corran," Roughy Two's voice came through the comm-port. "We all know that you're a Jedi."

Laughter from a dozen or more BBQ-Wings floated into the space over Nova sector.

"Nice, guys," Hornhonker bit out sarcastically.

"That's not what I meant, Roughy Nine," Wedge Doorstop's voice cut through the interference on the frequency. "It won't take a Jedi Master to ID that ship. Looks to me like...."

"It's not Booster Shot, is it Wedge?"

"Negative, Roughy Nine, it is not the Misadventure."

Everybody in Nova Sector heard Hornhonker's sigh of relief. Now was not the time to be confronted by his father-in-law.

"It looks much smaller than a Star Destroyer, actually. More like a...."

"Corellian Cruiser?"

"Exactly. Roughy Seven, engage scanners. How many life forms aboard?"

"Three life forms and one annoying droid, Sir," Roughy Seven reported.

"Looks an awful lot like the Y2K Vulture to me Wedge," Hornhonker offered.

"Then that would mean..."

"You got it Wedge. The Hand of Solo and his wife, Leia Organic."

"New Republic President Leia Organic, to you," Wedge corrected. "The Wookiee is probably with them."

"Then who in blazes reported a Star Destroyer?" Roughy Nine sighed into his comm-port.

"I'll take a guess at that," a voice crackled over the frequency. The familiar voice of The Hand of Solo.

"I came out here to the Unknown Regions to have a little time alone with my wife.... maybe make another set of Jedi twins, if ya know what I mean," he sighed. "Only two people in the galaxy knew we were headed in this direction. My Jedi Master brother-in-law, and my old friend Landfill."

An odd silence hung over the group of starships. Some would say later that they had heard a burst of laughter that sounded alot like Landfill Cowrissian, others scoffed at the idea and said they were just spooked by the darkness of the Unknown Regions.

"Ahhhh, Roughy Squadron, this is Roughy Leader. Time for all of us to head on home. Apologies from the New Republic, Solo.... Organic."

The BBQ-Wings broke formation, each maneuvering the U-turn in his or her own way.

"See you on Coruscant, Doorstop," Roughy Nine replied, and with the touch of their nav-comps, the Roughy Squadron disappeared into totally-hyperspace.

"Ahhh, alone at last," Leia Organic sighed, wrapping her arms around her husband.

"Yeah," The Hand of Solo replied with a lopsided grin. "At least until somebody else reports seeing a Star Destroyer in Nova Sector."

Leia smiled up at him as she led him down the corridors of the Y2K Vulture.

"Now what was that you said about a new set of Jedi twins?"

The End.