The Scary Puppet Show
br
Disclaimer: I owneth not the rights to any characters referenced in this piece. Zim, Dib, and G.I.R. are property of Jhonen Vasquez and/or Nickelodeon *hiss*. Grrr... Anyway, don't sue me yadda yadda yadda.... I eat small children. )
br
br
Chapter One
br
It was an uneventful Saturday afternoon. Lightening ebbed across the sky, thunder rolled over the city, and raindrops plipped on the pavement. Yes, an uneventful iboring/i afternoon. GIR sat in front of the t.v., getting his daily fix of the "Scary Monkey Show". The adorable little robot was thoroughly enjoying his program, sending bits of pretzel and candy at the screen during the commercial breaks, and throwing said trail mix into the air when the show came back on. Zim, on the other hand, was not having nearly as much fun.
"Dammit! If there's one thing I hate it's storms!" he ranted. "And Dib. Definitely Dib."
Zim sighed in resignation. Complaining would get him nowhere. This, of course, only infuriated him further. The rain had ruined one of Zim's many attempts to take over the world. This failure was especially discouraging - Zim hadn't even put it into motion. "It was such a brilliant plan, too," sighed Zim. "And I'll probably never get the opportunity again." No point dwelling on it. Not one to give up easily, Zim tinkered about his lab, checking over his equipment and security system. Yes, the lawn gnomes were doing a fine job....
*CRASH*
...of conducting electricity. Sparks flew, and the power cut out. Zim stared, speechless. Then...
"A power surge?! In iMY/i lab?! FOOK!!!"
The screen was black. GIR sat for a moment, staring at the screen. No more "Scary Monkey Show". This made GIR very, ivery/i unhappy. He threw the bowl of trail mix at the t.v., screaming "NOOOOOOO! *sniff* I.... I loveded....... I LOVEDED YOU!!!" He fell into convulsions on the floor. As GIR twitched, Zim trudged through the upstairs doorway.
"GIR, I need you to go outside-" Zim paused, staring at the twitching heap in his living room. "Um, GIR? GIR! Get up, GIR!" Slowly, the tiny mech sat up, eyes glowing red in narrow slits.
"Master..."
Zim took a step back, knowing his dysfunctional SIR was armed to the teeth.
"Yes, GIR?"
"I WANT MY SCARY MONKEY SHOW!!!" GIR leapt at Zim, clinging to his face. "GIVE ME SCARY MONKEY!"
"I can't! The power's out, the circuit breaker is in the power shed out back, it's raining, I don't do well with water, and an umbrella would only act as a lightening rod! Now get off, GIR!"
"NO." shouted GIR. Zim quietly fumed.
"Get off."
"NO!!! SCARY MONKIES!!!"
Zim glowered, and recalled what the Almighty Tallests had told him. i"He's not stupid, he's.... advanced!"/i Now, Zim isn't one to doubt the Almighty Tallests, but sometimes he had to wonder... In any case, GIR clamped down harder over Zim's face, making it difficult for the alien to breathe. He struggled valiantly to push the little robot off his face, but to no avail. Zim grabbed a crowbar from the closet and wrenched GIR off. It was a ... painful experience for both parties involved. GIR glared at Zim. Zim threw the crowbar back into the closet. GIR was useless, but he'd be even worse off in pieces. Zim looked out the window. The rain showed no sign of letting up. He needed to get the power back on line, and fast. He was completely defenseless. Dib could show up at any time, and do..... stuff.... Zim looked at GIR, who was istill/i glaring.
"GIR, would you like to watch the 'Scary Monkey Show'?" The tiny robot perked up and nodded ferociously.
"Scary Monkey! I want Scary Monkey, Master!"
"Then you need to go outside and flip the switches on the circuit breaker." GIR glared.
"No." Zim was losing patience.
"That's an order, GIR! Go trip the circuit breaker!"
"NO." Obstinate little guy...
"NOW!"
"NO!!!" GIR jumped up, arming himself with various objects of destruction. Zim cursed himself for leaving his tazer downstairs in the lab. Ha had no choice but to reason with GIR. Yep, he'd be dead before the day was out...
"Okay, just calm down! Here, look! Zim has sugar! Would GIR like sugar???" Zim tossed a five pound bag of unrefined sugar at GIR, who tore through the bag and began to munch on the sugary goodness. The living room was a wreck, but at least he was busy. Zim approached GIR again, much more carefully than before.
"GIR, why won't you go and trip the breaker?" GIR stood up, red eyes glaring at Zim. "I'm only asking! Look! Sugar! Eat more sugar GIR!"
GIR munched, and said "Master should go trip it. It's his fault power went out!"
"What the heck did I do?!"
"Overloaded the circuits with the security system."
"I have to!" retorted Zim, furious. "Otherwise Dib will cut me up or something!"
"But he's such a nice boy!" Zim smacked his forehead, wondering where he had slung the crowbar.
br
Disclaimer: I owneth not the rights to any characters referenced in this piece. Zim, Dib, and G.I.R. are property of Jhonen Vasquez and/or Nickelodeon *hiss*. Grrr... Anyway, don't sue me yadda yadda yadda.... I eat small children. )
br
br
Chapter One
br
It was an uneventful Saturday afternoon. Lightening ebbed across the sky, thunder rolled over the city, and raindrops plipped on the pavement. Yes, an uneventful iboring/i afternoon. GIR sat in front of the t.v., getting his daily fix of the "Scary Monkey Show". The adorable little robot was thoroughly enjoying his program, sending bits of pretzel and candy at the screen during the commercial breaks, and throwing said trail mix into the air when the show came back on. Zim, on the other hand, was not having nearly as much fun.
"Dammit! If there's one thing I hate it's storms!" he ranted. "And Dib. Definitely Dib."
Zim sighed in resignation. Complaining would get him nowhere. This, of course, only infuriated him further. The rain had ruined one of Zim's many attempts to take over the world. This failure was especially discouraging - Zim hadn't even put it into motion. "It was such a brilliant plan, too," sighed Zim. "And I'll probably never get the opportunity again." No point dwelling on it. Not one to give up easily, Zim tinkered about his lab, checking over his equipment and security system. Yes, the lawn gnomes were doing a fine job....
*CRASH*
...of conducting electricity. Sparks flew, and the power cut out. Zim stared, speechless. Then...
"A power surge?! In iMY/i lab?! FOOK!!!"
The screen was black. GIR sat for a moment, staring at the screen. No more "Scary Monkey Show". This made GIR very, ivery/i unhappy. He threw the bowl of trail mix at the t.v., screaming "NOOOOOOO! *sniff* I.... I loveded....... I LOVEDED YOU!!!" He fell into convulsions on the floor. As GIR twitched, Zim trudged through the upstairs doorway.
"GIR, I need you to go outside-" Zim paused, staring at the twitching heap in his living room. "Um, GIR? GIR! Get up, GIR!" Slowly, the tiny mech sat up, eyes glowing red in narrow slits.
"Master..."
Zim took a step back, knowing his dysfunctional SIR was armed to the teeth.
"Yes, GIR?"
"I WANT MY SCARY MONKEY SHOW!!!" GIR leapt at Zim, clinging to his face. "GIVE ME SCARY MONKEY!"
"I can't! The power's out, the circuit breaker is in the power shed out back, it's raining, I don't do well with water, and an umbrella would only act as a lightening rod! Now get off, GIR!"
"NO." shouted GIR. Zim quietly fumed.
"Get off."
"NO!!! SCARY MONKIES!!!"
Zim glowered, and recalled what the Almighty Tallests had told him. i"He's not stupid, he's.... advanced!"/i Now, Zim isn't one to doubt the Almighty Tallests, but sometimes he had to wonder... In any case, GIR clamped down harder over Zim's face, making it difficult for the alien to breathe. He struggled valiantly to push the little robot off his face, but to no avail. Zim grabbed a crowbar from the closet and wrenched GIR off. It was a ... painful experience for both parties involved. GIR glared at Zim. Zim threw the crowbar back into the closet. GIR was useless, but he'd be even worse off in pieces. Zim looked out the window. The rain showed no sign of letting up. He needed to get the power back on line, and fast. He was completely defenseless. Dib could show up at any time, and do..... stuff.... Zim looked at GIR, who was istill/i glaring.
"GIR, would you like to watch the 'Scary Monkey Show'?" The tiny robot perked up and nodded ferociously.
"Scary Monkey! I want Scary Monkey, Master!"
"Then you need to go outside and flip the switches on the circuit breaker." GIR glared.
"No." Zim was losing patience.
"That's an order, GIR! Go trip the circuit breaker!"
"NO." Obstinate little guy...
"NOW!"
"NO!!!" GIR jumped up, arming himself with various objects of destruction. Zim cursed himself for leaving his tazer downstairs in the lab. Ha had no choice but to reason with GIR. Yep, he'd be dead before the day was out...
"Okay, just calm down! Here, look! Zim has sugar! Would GIR like sugar???" Zim tossed a five pound bag of unrefined sugar at GIR, who tore through the bag and began to munch on the sugary goodness. The living room was a wreck, but at least he was busy. Zim approached GIR again, much more carefully than before.
"GIR, why won't you go and trip the breaker?" GIR stood up, red eyes glaring at Zim. "I'm only asking! Look! Sugar! Eat more sugar GIR!"
GIR munched, and said "Master should go trip it. It's his fault power went out!"
"What the heck did I do?!"
"Overloaded the circuits with the security system."
"I have to!" retorted Zim, furious. "Otherwise Dib will cut me up or something!"
"But he's such a nice boy!" Zim smacked his forehead, wondering where he had slung the crowbar.