A long time ago in Ancient Greece,
Men were men, but there was no peace.

***

Peleus woos Thetis in a most unusual way.
He catches her and makes her his prey.

She turns into a bird and tries to soar high,
but Peleus hangs on to her thigh.

And then her form turns into flame,
but Peleus manages to keep her tame.

A slippery, slithery snake she now is,
But Peleus' strong arm does not miss.

He gives her nose one great box
And fells her like a flattened ox.

"All right, you have me," she admits,
"Although I think you are a git."

A few days later they would marry,
No, they definitely did not tarry.

A few years later, they had a son.
"His name's Achilles, everyone!"