Chapter 3
Dr Legaspi hurried up the stairs, wanting only to be out of the building as quickly as possible. She swept across the main lobby and out into the busy streets. She wandered aimlessly, her thoughts in turmoil. After a while she looked up, surprised at where her feet had carried her. With a weary sigh, she entered one of favourite old haunts. Kim draped herself at the corner of the bar, oddly comforted that nothing had changed in a year. Gladly, she accepted the drink brought to her and sipped at it slowly, lost to the world.
She had no idea of how much time had passed when a friendly voice asked,
"Penny for them?"
The voice belonged to a complete stranger. But not an unattractive one - Kim's new neighbour was a slight brunette with warm brown eyes. Legaspi had been in this position enough times to know when someone was coming on to her. But the woman couldn't have picked a worse time.
"Sorry?" replied Kim irritably.
"You look like you could do with cheering up."
Kim looked over at her scathingly, answering,
"My best friend's in a coma."
"God, I'm sorry!"
The newcomer did seem genuinely embarrassed. Kim summoned up a small smile.
"It's OK. You didn't know. I should be getting back to her."
But she was not allowed to get away that easily. The other woman turned to face Kim as she stood up, asking,
"Back to County General?"
"Yes - why?"
"I should be there right now - I'm a physio. But we're having a slow day, so I -"
"Slacked off?"
"Yep."
Both smiled, the tension broken. Kim turned back to the bar,
"I used to work there myself." She put out her hand. "Kim Legaspi, psychiatrist."
"A shrink, eh. I'm Rose, Rose Carrol."
Kim looked at her watch, unwilling to take this much further.
"I really have to go. Nice meeting you, Rose. Even shrinks need cheering up sometimes."
"I guess they do."
Kim turned to go.
"Maybe I'll see you round some time," called Rose hopefully. Kim was already gone.
- -- - -- - -- - -- -
That Saturday night was the first since Christy's dramatic reappearance that Kerry and Sandy had some time to themselves.
They shared a cosy dinner at home, laughing and teasing light-heartedly, until Kerry had almost forgotten the trials of the previous day. Almost - until her partner innocently asked;
"So how's that woman I brought in?"
Kerry stiffened, and Sandy recognised the all-too-familiar Weaver tactics of silence and withdrawal.
"Who'd she remind you of, Ker? The psychiatrist?"
From what she had learnt of Weaver's past, Kim was the only real possibility.
Kerry frowned, looking down at her plate.
"Yeah..." her eyes were dull, looking deep within, "But more of myself."
"Huh?"
"I'm not the same person I was a year ago."
She looked up, a flicker of warmth lighting those sad eyes, and grasped Sandy's hands on the table.
"And a big part of that is thanks to you." She paused, looking away again into the past.
"You know what I did to her. It was unforgivable. Christy, the woman we took in...she was Kim's friend. Seeing her brought it all back."
She looked up again, her voice breaking, her eyes filling with tears.
"I hate that Kerry." she murmured, "I wanted to forget her."
"Oh, honey,"
Sandy felt her own eyes burning. It had been a long time since she'd seen Kerry so defenceless.
"Don't be like this," she continued, clutching her lover's trembling hands. "It's over now. I love you just as you are."
Weaver shook her head,
"It's not over. She came back, today..." Kerry struggled to continue, "She wouldn't even look at me!"
Sandy thought for a moment, wishing there was something she could do. One question came out of her mouth before she could stop it,
"You really loved her, didn't you."
"Yes."
Sandy closed her eyes, tightening her grip on the older woman's hands. She couldn't help wishing Kim had stayed in San Francisco. But what was important was that she helped Kerry through this.
"You know I'm here for you, don't you."
"I know."
Slowly, Weaver steadied herself, drawing strength from the other. By the end of dinner, she was almost human again.
- -- - -- - -- - -- -
Lunchtime arrived on Monday and Kerry hadn't screwed up the courage to visit the ICU. She didn't know if Kim was even there. When the residents started giving her odd looks, she decided to take a break.
Dr Legaspi had come to the same decision, after more than hour of her fruitless bedside vigil. Kim slipped into the canteen, hoping to avoid people's attention. But who was she kidding. The way she remembered this place, the whole staff probably knew she was back by now. One person certainly did. As soon as she had sat down, she was accosted by public enemy number one - Robert Romano. He strutted over to her, his voice just loud enough to be easily overheard.
"If it isn't the good Doctor Legaspi! Delighted to see you again."
She wouldn't even dignify that with an answer.
"Mind if I sit down?"
Not that he cared.
Searching for a sufficiently insulting conversational opener, he came up with,
"I take it you've met Dr Weaver?"
"Yes."
He leaned in confidentially, causing her to lean back almost out of her seat.
"I'll tell you," he continued, "My life would have been infinitely easier if I'd fired her last summer."
"Why didn't you?" she challenged.
"Because," he paused, plastering a phoney smile over his trollish little face, "She'd have sued my ass right out of the door. Some of us want to keep our jobs."
Warned, perhaps, by the fury blazing in her eyes, he changed his tack slightly.
"So is this a flying visit, or are you planning to stay? I'm sure I could find you something to do."
"I don't know. One of my friends was admitted last week -"
"Ah, yes," he interrupted, "I remember her. So tell me, is she really just a 'friend', or - "
"That's none of your business, Robert."
He span around, suddenly uneasy,
"Kerry! How do you do it. Always manage to spoil my fun."
He wilted slightly under their combined glares.
"OK, OK, I know when I'm not wanted."
At last, he was leaving. Kim sighed and unclenched her fists, then looked up gratefully at her saviour.
"Good timing, Kerry."
Weaver stood there awkwardly, lunch in hand.
"I guessed you needed rescuing."
"You guessed right."
"Mind if I sit?"
"Please."
Kim cringed inwardly at the hated formalities. 'Where are we, the 1950's'
She made an effort to defrost things a bit.
"At least someone hasn't changed."
Kerry was taken aback, but managed not to show it in her face.
"No, I don't think he ever will."
"Kerry, I - "
Weaver cut in. She really hadn't much time, and couldn't face starting something with such a blatantly attentive audience.
"I can't stay, Kim, I just came up for a sandwich. Maybe I'll see you tomorrow."
Legaspi was on her own once more, but now all eyes were on her, rather than just most of them. She couldn't give a damn, her thoughts on much more important things. Like Kerry's obvious discomfort, and how she could get past it.
Dr Legaspi hurried up the stairs, wanting only to be out of the building as quickly as possible. She swept across the main lobby and out into the busy streets. She wandered aimlessly, her thoughts in turmoil. After a while she looked up, surprised at where her feet had carried her. With a weary sigh, she entered one of favourite old haunts. Kim draped herself at the corner of the bar, oddly comforted that nothing had changed in a year. Gladly, she accepted the drink brought to her and sipped at it slowly, lost to the world.
She had no idea of how much time had passed when a friendly voice asked,
"Penny for them?"
The voice belonged to a complete stranger. But not an unattractive one - Kim's new neighbour was a slight brunette with warm brown eyes. Legaspi had been in this position enough times to know when someone was coming on to her. But the woman couldn't have picked a worse time.
"Sorry?" replied Kim irritably.
"You look like you could do with cheering up."
Kim looked over at her scathingly, answering,
"My best friend's in a coma."
"God, I'm sorry!"
The newcomer did seem genuinely embarrassed. Kim summoned up a small smile.
"It's OK. You didn't know. I should be getting back to her."
But she was not allowed to get away that easily. The other woman turned to face Kim as she stood up, asking,
"Back to County General?"
"Yes - why?"
"I should be there right now - I'm a physio. But we're having a slow day, so I -"
"Slacked off?"
"Yep."
Both smiled, the tension broken. Kim turned back to the bar,
"I used to work there myself." She put out her hand. "Kim Legaspi, psychiatrist."
"A shrink, eh. I'm Rose, Rose Carrol."
Kim looked at her watch, unwilling to take this much further.
"I really have to go. Nice meeting you, Rose. Even shrinks need cheering up sometimes."
"I guess they do."
Kim turned to go.
"Maybe I'll see you round some time," called Rose hopefully. Kim was already gone.
- -- - -- - -- - -- -
That Saturday night was the first since Christy's dramatic reappearance that Kerry and Sandy had some time to themselves.
They shared a cosy dinner at home, laughing and teasing light-heartedly, until Kerry had almost forgotten the trials of the previous day. Almost - until her partner innocently asked;
"So how's that woman I brought in?"
Kerry stiffened, and Sandy recognised the all-too-familiar Weaver tactics of silence and withdrawal.
"Who'd she remind you of, Ker? The psychiatrist?"
From what she had learnt of Weaver's past, Kim was the only real possibility.
Kerry frowned, looking down at her plate.
"Yeah..." her eyes were dull, looking deep within, "But more of myself."
"Huh?"
"I'm not the same person I was a year ago."
She looked up, a flicker of warmth lighting those sad eyes, and grasped Sandy's hands on the table.
"And a big part of that is thanks to you." She paused, looking away again into the past.
"You know what I did to her. It was unforgivable. Christy, the woman we took in...she was Kim's friend. Seeing her brought it all back."
She looked up again, her voice breaking, her eyes filling with tears.
"I hate that Kerry." she murmured, "I wanted to forget her."
"Oh, honey,"
Sandy felt her own eyes burning. It had been a long time since she'd seen Kerry so defenceless.
"Don't be like this," she continued, clutching her lover's trembling hands. "It's over now. I love you just as you are."
Weaver shook her head,
"It's not over. She came back, today..." Kerry struggled to continue, "She wouldn't even look at me!"
Sandy thought for a moment, wishing there was something she could do. One question came out of her mouth before she could stop it,
"You really loved her, didn't you."
"Yes."
Sandy closed her eyes, tightening her grip on the older woman's hands. She couldn't help wishing Kim had stayed in San Francisco. But what was important was that she helped Kerry through this.
"You know I'm here for you, don't you."
"I know."
Slowly, Weaver steadied herself, drawing strength from the other. By the end of dinner, she was almost human again.
- -- - -- - -- - -- -
Lunchtime arrived on Monday and Kerry hadn't screwed up the courage to visit the ICU. She didn't know if Kim was even there. When the residents started giving her odd looks, she decided to take a break.
Dr Legaspi had come to the same decision, after more than hour of her fruitless bedside vigil. Kim slipped into the canteen, hoping to avoid people's attention. But who was she kidding. The way she remembered this place, the whole staff probably knew she was back by now. One person certainly did. As soon as she had sat down, she was accosted by public enemy number one - Robert Romano. He strutted over to her, his voice just loud enough to be easily overheard.
"If it isn't the good Doctor Legaspi! Delighted to see you again."
She wouldn't even dignify that with an answer.
"Mind if I sit down?"
Not that he cared.
Searching for a sufficiently insulting conversational opener, he came up with,
"I take it you've met Dr Weaver?"
"Yes."
He leaned in confidentially, causing her to lean back almost out of her seat.
"I'll tell you," he continued, "My life would have been infinitely easier if I'd fired her last summer."
"Why didn't you?" she challenged.
"Because," he paused, plastering a phoney smile over his trollish little face, "She'd have sued my ass right out of the door. Some of us want to keep our jobs."
Warned, perhaps, by the fury blazing in her eyes, he changed his tack slightly.
"So is this a flying visit, or are you planning to stay? I'm sure I could find you something to do."
"I don't know. One of my friends was admitted last week -"
"Ah, yes," he interrupted, "I remember her. So tell me, is she really just a 'friend', or - "
"That's none of your business, Robert."
He span around, suddenly uneasy,
"Kerry! How do you do it. Always manage to spoil my fun."
He wilted slightly under their combined glares.
"OK, OK, I know when I'm not wanted."
At last, he was leaving. Kim sighed and unclenched her fists, then looked up gratefully at her saviour.
"Good timing, Kerry."
Weaver stood there awkwardly, lunch in hand.
"I guessed you needed rescuing."
"You guessed right."
"Mind if I sit?"
"Please."
Kim cringed inwardly at the hated formalities. 'Where are we, the 1950's'
She made an effort to defrost things a bit.
"At least someone hasn't changed."
Kerry was taken aback, but managed not to show it in her face.
"No, I don't think he ever will."
"Kerry, I - "
Weaver cut in. She really hadn't much time, and couldn't face starting something with such a blatantly attentive audience.
"I can't stay, Kim, I just came up for a sandwich. Maybe I'll see you tomorrow."
Legaspi was on her own once more, but now all eyes were on her, rather than just most of them. She couldn't give a damn, her thoughts on much more important things. Like Kerry's obvious discomfort, and how she could get past it.