The Wait
by Rien
Standard disclaimers apply
Chapter 13: Kaede's Fears
After that lovemaking, our routine changed... We play basketball then go to his house and make love over and over again until we can not move anymore. Kaede is very passionate when we are alone and very possessive. His jealousy is radiating with hatred.
*flashback*
"Oi, Sakuragi-kun!"
I looked behind me and saw Sendoh with Koshino with him. I looked at them with puzzlement and wonder. They entered the gym and sat down the bench. They happily chatted with Ayako ang Anzai-sensei. I walked towards them after the practice has ended an smiled. Before I can utter any word to them, an arm a wrapped around my waist. The arm belonged to Kaede. Did I mentioned that he also kissed my neck? I was so embarrassed that we were practically making out in public. I looked at Ayako ang the other team memebers. They secretly smiling at me, their eyes saying good luck. Good luck? Why do I need to have any good lucks? I looked at him and saw hatred and jelousy at the two Ryonan players.
"That's a nice scene, Sakuragi-kun, Rukawa-kun..." Sendoh said while smiling his clown smiles. I looked away and saw that the other members went t the locker room to change, not minding them at all, Ayako ang Anzai-sensei had left. So, we are alone....
"What are you doing here?" Kaede said from behind, his voice full of venom. If his death glare really can kill, Sendoh and Koshino would be forever extinguished by now.
"We're just visiting Rukawa-kun, no need to get all worked up..." the smiley said. Koshino just nodded and smiled.
"Well, I guess your doing alright so we'll leave you two lovebirds alone..." his smile bcam a grin and I felt my face become warmer still. I think my face is much more redder than my hair right now, he thought.
As they left, the arm around my waist loosen a bit but I didn't move. I like the warmness of my lovers body behind me. He kissed my neck again and and moved to my ear.
"You're mine, do'aho"
*end of flashback*
I looked forward with these things everyday. I was priviledged enough to be the only one that can raise these feelings from him. Sometimes I provoke him to just see the sparks from his eyes. I love every minute that i have to spend with him. But everything changed after 5 months in our relationship. My kitsune changed, became cold and unfeeling once again. His touches, his responses are all distant. We never made love again and we never spend as much time as we have in the previous months. Questions left unanswered.
We played basketball but he did not wait for me anymore. Nobody seemed to realize it but I do. Every night I sleep alone in my bed, I felt my depression clawing its way out, trying to resurface once again. Even if my depression is slowly rising, my trust for him is still unaffected. I still trust him whole-heartedly. But one day, I finally knew the answer for everything that was happening and no, he didn't find someone else.
"Do'aho"
"Teme kitsune!!! Who are you calling Do'aho?"
"You, who else?"
I was enraged that I suddenly walked to him and grabbed his collar. It felt like old days but he just shrugged against it and sat in the floor. I sat beside him.
"What's wrong Kaede?" I asked.
"We need to go to our separate ways from now on Hana.."
I was shocked at that statement. As I analyze the situation properly, I saw my depression laughing it's head off and saying that you have nothing once again. You should've have died you know, it said. I blink away the tears that are forming in my eyes.
"Are you saying that we need to stop seeing each other?"
He only noded in response. I can see my world shatter before my eyes, my fire of hope extinguish with just that gesture. I was shocked. I think he saw my face and explained things to me that I would know why he made a hard decision.
"My parents are coming home and they are really homophobic. I don't think they would understand two boys falling in love with each other. They would separate us, but that is not the only worry I'm facing...." he glanced at me and continued, "...I'm sure they would put the blame on you, they would all of it even though I said that it was my fault... They would not listen... I can't stand hearing things like that when they are persecuting is the person I love..." he finished with a sob. I comforted him in my arms.
"Don't worry, I understand..."
"I'm sorry..." he whipered.
"You're not taking a risk and I do understand..."
I stood up and smiled at him. I walked back to the locker room and grabbed my things and went home. That night was the coldest and loneliness night I ever had. I cried and cried until I can not cry anymore. I kept saying tomyself that he still loves me.... but he doesn't want to take any risk! That coward! My heartbroke became hate that is fuelled by my loneliness. I'll show him, I'll show him!!!!
by Rien
Standard disclaimers apply
Chapter 13: Kaede's Fears
After that lovemaking, our routine changed... We play basketball then go to his house and make love over and over again until we can not move anymore. Kaede is very passionate when we are alone and very possessive. His jealousy is radiating with hatred.
*flashback*
"Oi, Sakuragi-kun!"
I looked behind me and saw Sendoh with Koshino with him. I looked at them with puzzlement and wonder. They entered the gym and sat down the bench. They happily chatted with Ayako ang Anzai-sensei. I walked towards them after the practice has ended an smiled. Before I can utter any word to them, an arm a wrapped around my waist. The arm belonged to Kaede. Did I mentioned that he also kissed my neck? I was so embarrassed that we were practically making out in public. I looked at Ayako ang the other team memebers. They secretly smiling at me, their eyes saying good luck. Good luck? Why do I need to have any good lucks? I looked at him and saw hatred and jelousy at the two Ryonan players.
"That's a nice scene, Sakuragi-kun, Rukawa-kun..." Sendoh said while smiling his clown smiles. I looked away and saw that the other members went t the locker room to change, not minding them at all, Ayako ang Anzai-sensei had left. So, we are alone....
"What are you doing here?" Kaede said from behind, his voice full of venom. If his death glare really can kill, Sendoh and Koshino would be forever extinguished by now.
"We're just visiting Rukawa-kun, no need to get all worked up..." the smiley said. Koshino just nodded and smiled.
"Well, I guess your doing alright so we'll leave you two lovebirds alone..." his smile bcam a grin and I felt my face become warmer still. I think my face is much more redder than my hair right now, he thought.
As they left, the arm around my waist loosen a bit but I didn't move. I like the warmness of my lovers body behind me. He kissed my neck again and and moved to my ear.
"You're mine, do'aho"
*end of flashback*
I looked forward with these things everyday. I was priviledged enough to be the only one that can raise these feelings from him. Sometimes I provoke him to just see the sparks from his eyes. I love every minute that i have to spend with him. But everything changed after 5 months in our relationship. My kitsune changed, became cold and unfeeling once again. His touches, his responses are all distant. We never made love again and we never spend as much time as we have in the previous months. Questions left unanswered.
We played basketball but he did not wait for me anymore. Nobody seemed to realize it but I do. Every night I sleep alone in my bed, I felt my depression clawing its way out, trying to resurface once again. Even if my depression is slowly rising, my trust for him is still unaffected. I still trust him whole-heartedly. But one day, I finally knew the answer for everything that was happening and no, he didn't find someone else.
"Do'aho"
"Teme kitsune!!! Who are you calling Do'aho?"
"You, who else?"
I was enraged that I suddenly walked to him and grabbed his collar. It felt like old days but he just shrugged against it and sat in the floor. I sat beside him.
"What's wrong Kaede?" I asked.
"We need to go to our separate ways from now on Hana.."
I was shocked at that statement. As I analyze the situation properly, I saw my depression laughing it's head off and saying that you have nothing once again. You should've have died you know, it said. I blink away the tears that are forming in my eyes.
"Are you saying that we need to stop seeing each other?"
He only noded in response. I can see my world shatter before my eyes, my fire of hope extinguish with just that gesture. I was shocked. I think he saw my face and explained things to me that I would know why he made a hard decision.
"My parents are coming home and they are really homophobic. I don't think they would understand two boys falling in love with each other. They would separate us, but that is not the only worry I'm facing...." he glanced at me and continued, "...I'm sure they would put the blame on you, they would all of it even though I said that it was my fault... They would not listen... I can't stand hearing things like that when they are persecuting is the person I love..." he finished with a sob. I comforted him in my arms.
"Don't worry, I understand..."
"I'm sorry..." he whipered.
"You're not taking a risk and I do understand..."
I stood up and smiled at him. I walked back to the locker room and grabbed my things and went home. That night was the coldest and loneliness night I ever had. I cried and cried until I can not cry anymore. I kept saying tomyself that he still loves me.... but he doesn't want to take any risk! That coward! My heartbroke became hate that is fuelled by my loneliness. I'll show him, I'll show him!!!!