Title - Tears of Yesterday III
Author - Nicky
Rating - PG-13
Category - JMPR, MP/L, MSR
Spoilers: Pretender Season 4, X-Files Season 8 Finale
Summary - Jarod and Miss Parker make some unexpected friends and discover some unexpected ties.
Disclaimer: The characters Miss Parker, Sydney, Jarod, Broots etc. and the fictional Centre, are all property of MTM, TNT and NBC Productions and used without permission. Mulder and Scully belong to Chris Carter, 1013 Productions and Fox. I'm not making any money out of this and no infringement is intended.
* * * * * * * * * *
Chapter 10
* * * * * * * * * *
Lyle sits on the porch, looking out into the darkness surrounding
him. The forest is strangely calming to him. In the distance,
he can hear all the many sounds of nature blending together to
play a nocturnal symphony. With only the light of the moon, he
can see the land that stretches for miles around.
"It's really beautiful out here," Mulder says, interrupting his
silence. Lyle motions for the man to sit down next to him.
Mulder waits patiently, sensing Lyle's need to talk.
"I don't know what to think about all this," Lyle admits.
"About what?"
"Everything," he sighs. "Six months ago, I was comfortable with
myself. Or the persona I had taken on for my entire life. I
only had to worry about myself and how I was going to succeed. I
was feared and hated. And that made me feel powerful. I had no
relationships at all, but I didn't care. Other people were just
too needy. And I didn't have what it took to deal with that.
Emotions were for the weak. I didn't want to be weak."
"What changed that?" Mulder gently asks him.
"Parker. She was the only person I actually feared. She was . .
. scary, for lack of a better work. She was intense and cool
under all circumstances. She was fearless. But one day, I saw
her cringe. I saw a man who had done something to her to
actually make her afraid of him. Then I looked at her - really
looked at her - and saw what he had done to her. And I don't
know what happened, but something inside me made me want to
protect her. I knew she didn't need my help. She never has.
But at that moment, I just couldn't believe she would let
somebody . . . beat her and for him to still be standing. I
think her gun is the only thing she may love more than Jarod," he
says with a smile.
"You're used to her being able to take care of herself. When you
saw the bruises of her confrontation with this man, both physical
and emotional, you realized that maybe she wasn't superwoman
after all. You felt needed for once. It was a new high. A new
thrill," Mulder analyzes.
"It was," Lyle nods emphatically, surprised that Mulder is able
to understand what he's trying to say. "I had never felt as if
anyone needed me before. And I liked that feeling. It was the
first time when doing something for someone else gave me a rush
like that."
"From what you tell me, you and Parker always had a volatile and
highly passionate relationship. Even if the only emotion was
hate, that was at least something. That was a connection. But
this situation helped you connect with her in a more loving way."
"Is that what this feeling is?" Lyle laughs. "Loving. Caring.
Those are foreign concepts to me. Things I never cared about."
"That's not entirely true," Mulder disagrees. "You said that
everything you have done, you did for yourself. But I think
acceptance by your father, or the man you thought was your
father, was a big influence as well. You saw that acceptance as
a form of love."
Lyle just grins at this, taking a moment to let it sink in.
"You're a smart guy, Fox Mulder," he says after a while.
"And you're not as bad as you think you are, Lyle."
"What if I am?" he whispers. "What if I can't be the kind of guy
they expect. Parker has Jarod now. I can't live up to him. And
what about Ben? What if I'm nothing but a disappointment to
him?"
"Nobody's perfect and they don't expect you to be either.
Listen, I understand how you're feeling," Mulder assures him. "I
didn't exactly have the best childhood, either. My father was
hardly candidate for father of the year. I was worried about the
kind of father I'd be for William. But all I can do is love him
with all my heart. That's all he needs from me. And that's the
same with you. Love Parker. Love Ben. And let them love you in
return. Everything else will work out on its own."
"Follow my heart and it'll tell me where to go?" Lyle asks
dubiously.
"It sounds trite, but it's good advice."
"Even if it's telling me to do as my father asks and kill Carson?
That is the one order that I won't mind following," he growls.
"That man ruined my sister's life. And he should pay."
"The Centre ruined her life, too. And yours and Jarod's. Why
don't you make the Centre pay? Make your father pay? But bring
them to justice, Lyle. Don't make this turn this into revenge.
You won't do Parker or Ben any good if you're in jail."
"I didn't think of that," he mutters dejectedly. "You see what I
mean? I'm going to let them down. And they'll hate me."
"This is new for you. It's a whole new way of life. A whole new
way of thinking. But what's important to note is that you
consider other people's reactions now. You care about how they
see your actions. That's a force that drives us all in one form
or another. You're more human than you think, Lyle," Mulder
reassures him. "Listen, I'm not saying you're going to be saint
of the year all of a sudden. But you've obviously changed for
the better. And that's a start."
"But what do I do about Carson? My father? The Centre?"
"I don't know. But whatever you decide, you don't have to do it
alone. You have family now. I'll help you."
"You would do that?" Lyle asks incredulously? "For me? Why?"
"Like I said. We're family, Lyle. I'll always be behind you as
long as what you're doing is right. Think about that." He
stands and pats the man on the shoulder before heading up the
path towards the cabin.
"Wait," Lyle calls after him. "If you're serious about helping,
then I think I may have an idea."
* * * * * * * * * *
The sound of a baby's cry seeps through Scully's sleep muddled
brain. She reaches her hand across the bed without even opening
her eyes. She remembers laying in the bed with William. But
when her hand hits nothing, she's immediately awake. She looks
across the room into the crib and sees that it's empty. Panic
grips her heart as she wonders where her son is.
"Mulder," she calls out, rising from the bed and making her way
to the door. She opens the door and steps out into the living
room, calling for him again.
"He's not here," Jarod mumbles to her. He was sitting on the
floor with the handle end of a pacifier in his mouth, baby powder
in one hand, and trying to open a pack of diapers with the other.
A screaming William is laying on the floor between his legs.
Just next to him, Miss Parker sits in a similar position, Serena
angrily kicking her legs in the air.
"Let me get him," Scully says, trying to hold back a laugh at the
sight. She bends down and scoops up the howling infant into her
arms, gently calming him in a way that only she can. "I can't
believe Mulder left you two alone with two small babies."
"Oh, it was fine. For awhile, anyway," Miss Parker says, blowing
a bit of hair from her eye. "But Serena decided she wanted to
start screaming. And William decided he wanted to join her. I
guess they got a little excited because now they both need new
diapers."
"I'm sorry. You should have woken me," Scully apologizes. "I
should be the one taking care of you, Parker. Not the other way
around."
"Don't worry about it, Dana. I'm feeling so much better than I
did in the hospital."
"Knock knock. Is everyone decent?" Mulder sticks his head into
the cabin and looks around. He takes one looks at Scully's face
and has the feeling he should turn back around and come back
later. He holds the door open for Lyle and lets him enter first.
"By all means. Come in, Mulder," she says coolly. She walks
over and hands the baby to him. "William was crying for you."
"Sorry," he says, putting on the innocent puppy dog face that
usually melted her anger. "Hey, Buddy. Were you giving Uncle
Jarod and Aunt Parker a hard time?"
"They certainly are loud," Lyle frowns, plugging his ears to
block out the babies' cries. "Do they do that a lot?"
"What? Cry? Lyle, it's what all babies do," Miss Parker laughs.
Jarod helps her finish changing Serena's diaper and then lifts
the baby into his arms. Miss Parker struggles to raise herself
to a standing position and then takes the baby from him. "Right
now, it's lunch time. So you boys make nice while I go feed
her."
"I'll come too," Scully says, taking William from Mulder. "I'm
sure this little guy could use a snack."
Mulder waits until the door to the bedroom closes before turning
to face Jarod. Lyle does the same and Jarod starts to feel a
little self conscious at their sudden attention.
"What?" he asks.
"We came up with a plan," Mulder tells him.
Jarod looks from Mulder to Lyle and then back to Mulder again,
wondering what the two of them managed to cook up.
"Something tells me that Parker and Dana won't like it very
much," Jarod says.
"They won't," Lyle sighs. "They won't like it at all. But it's
something that must be done. And it must be done now - before
it's too late.
To be continued . . .
Author - Nicky
Rating - PG-13
Category - JMPR, MP/L, MSR
Spoilers: Pretender Season 4, X-Files Season 8 Finale
Summary - Jarod and Miss Parker make some unexpected friends and discover some unexpected ties.
Disclaimer: The characters Miss Parker, Sydney, Jarod, Broots etc. and the fictional Centre, are all property of MTM, TNT and NBC Productions and used without permission. Mulder and Scully belong to Chris Carter, 1013 Productions and Fox. I'm not making any money out of this and no infringement is intended.
* * * * * * * * * *
Chapter 10
* * * * * * * * * *
Lyle sits on the porch, looking out into the darkness surrounding
him. The forest is strangely calming to him. In the distance,
he can hear all the many sounds of nature blending together to
play a nocturnal symphony. With only the light of the moon, he
can see the land that stretches for miles around.
"It's really beautiful out here," Mulder says, interrupting his
silence. Lyle motions for the man to sit down next to him.
Mulder waits patiently, sensing Lyle's need to talk.
"I don't know what to think about all this," Lyle admits.
"About what?"
"Everything," he sighs. "Six months ago, I was comfortable with
myself. Or the persona I had taken on for my entire life. I
only had to worry about myself and how I was going to succeed. I
was feared and hated. And that made me feel powerful. I had no
relationships at all, but I didn't care. Other people were just
too needy. And I didn't have what it took to deal with that.
Emotions were for the weak. I didn't want to be weak."
"What changed that?" Mulder gently asks him.
"Parker. She was the only person I actually feared. She was . .
. scary, for lack of a better work. She was intense and cool
under all circumstances. She was fearless. But one day, I saw
her cringe. I saw a man who had done something to her to
actually make her afraid of him. Then I looked at her - really
looked at her - and saw what he had done to her. And I don't
know what happened, but something inside me made me want to
protect her. I knew she didn't need my help. She never has.
But at that moment, I just couldn't believe she would let
somebody . . . beat her and for him to still be standing. I
think her gun is the only thing she may love more than Jarod," he
says with a smile.
"You're used to her being able to take care of herself. When you
saw the bruises of her confrontation with this man, both physical
and emotional, you realized that maybe she wasn't superwoman
after all. You felt needed for once. It was a new high. A new
thrill," Mulder analyzes.
"It was," Lyle nods emphatically, surprised that Mulder is able
to understand what he's trying to say. "I had never felt as if
anyone needed me before. And I liked that feeling. It was the
first time when doing something for someone else gave me a rush
like that."
"From what you tell me, you and Parker always had a volatile and
highly passionate relationship. Even if the only emotion was
hate, that was at least something. That was a connection. But
this situation helped you connect with her in a more loving way."
"Is that what this feeling is?" Lyle laughs. "Loving. Caring.
Those are foreign concepts to me. Things I never cared about."
"That's not entirely true," Mulder disagrees. "You said that
everything you have done, you did for yourself. But I think
acceptance by your father, or the man you thought was your
father, was a big influence as well. You saw that acceptance as
a form of love."
Lyle just grins at this, taking a moment to let it sink in.
"You're a smart guy, Fox Mulder," he says after a while.
"And you're not as bad as you think you are, Lyle."
"What if I am?" he whispers. "What if I can't be the kind of guy
they expect. Parker has Jarod now. I can't live up to him. And
what about Ben? What if I'm nothing but a disappointment to
him?"
"Nobody's perfect and they don't expect you to be either.
Listen, I understand how you're feeling," Mulder assures him. "I
didn't exactly have the best childhood, either. My father was
hardly candidate for father of the year. I was worried about the
kind of father I'd be for William. But all I can do is love him
with all my heart. That's all he needs from me. And that's the
same with you. Love Parker. Love Ben. And let them love you in
return. Everything else will work out on its own."
"Follow my heart and it'll tell me where to go?" Lyle asks
dubiously.
"It sounds trite, but it's good advice."
"Even if it's telling me to do as my father asks and kill Carson?
That is the one order that I won't mind following," he growls.
"That man ruined my sister's life. And he should pay."
"The Centre ruined her life, too. And yours and Jarod's. Why
don't you make the Centre pay? Make your father pay? But bring
them to justice, Lyle. Don't make this turn this into revenge.
You won't do Parker or Ben any good if you're in jail."
"I didn't think of that," he mutters dejectedly. "You see what I
mean? I'm going to let them down. And they'll hate me."
"This is new for you. It's a whole new way of life. A whole new
way of thinking. But what's important to note is that you
consider other people's reactions now. You care about how they
see your actions. That's a force that drives us all in one form
or another. You're more human than you think, Lyle," Mulder
reassures him. "Listen, I'm not saying you're going to be saint
of the year all of a sudden. But you've obviously changed for
the better. And that's a start."
"But what do I do about Carson? My father? The Centre?"
"I don't know. But whatever you decide, you don't have to do it
alone. You have family now. I'll help you."
"You would do that?" Lyle asks incredulously? "For me? Why?"
"Like I said. We're family, Lyle. I'll always be behind you as
long as what you're doing is right. Think about that." He
stands and pats the man on the shoulder before heading up the
path towards the cabin.
"Wait," Lyle calls after him. "If you're serious about helping,
then I think I may have an idea."
* * * * * * * * * *
The sound of a baby's cry seeps through Scully's sleep muddled
brain. She reaches her hand across the bed without even opening
her eyes. She remembers laying in the bed with William. But
when her hand hits nothing, she's immediately awake. She looks
across the room into the crib and sees that it's empty. Panic
grips her heart as she wonders where her son is.
"Mulder," she calls out, rising from the bed and making her way
to the door. She opens the door and steps out into the living
room, calling for him again.
"He's not here," Jarod mumbles to her. He was sitting on the
floor with the handle end of a pacifier in his mouth, baby powder
in one hand, and trying to open a pack of diapers with the other.
A screaming William is laying on the floor between his legs.
Just next to him, Miss Parker sits in a similar position, Serena
angrily kicking her legs in the air.
"Let me get him," Scully says, trying to hold back a laugh at the
sight. She bends down and scoops up the howling infant into her
arms, gently calming him in a way that only she can. "I can't
believe Mulder left you two alone with two small babies."
"Oh, it was fine. For awhile, anyway," Miss Parker says, blowing
a bit of hair from her eye. "But Serena decided she wanted to
start screaming. And William decided he wanted to join her. I
guess they got a little excited because now they both need new
diapers."
"I'm sorry. You should have woken me," Scully apologizes. "I
should be the one taking care of you, Parker. Not the other way
around."
"Don't worry about it, Dana. I'm feeling so much better than I
did in the hospital."
"Knock knock. Is everyone decent?" Mulder sticks his head into
the cabin and looks around. He takes one looks at Scully's face
and has the feeling he should turn back around and come back
later. He holds the door open for Lyle and lets him enter first.
"By all means. Come in, Mulder," she says coolly. She walks
over and hands the baby to him. "William was crying for you."
"Sorry," he says, putting on the innocent puppy dog face that
usually melted her anger. "Hey, Buddy. Were you giving Uncle
Jarod and Aunt Parker a hard time?"
"They certainly are loud," Lyle frowns, plugging his ears to
block out the babies' cries. "Do they do that a lot?"
"What? Cry? Lyle, it's what all babies do," Miss Parker laughs.
Jarod helps her finish changing Serena's diaper and then lifts
the baby into his arms. Miss Parker struggles to raise herself
to a standing position and then takes the baby from him. "Right
now, it's lunch time. So you boys make nice while I go feed
her."
"I'll come too," Scully says, taking William from Mulder. "I'm
sure this little guy could use a snack."
Mulder waits until the door to the bedroom closes before turning
to face Jarod. Lyle does the same and Jarod starts to feel a
little self conscious at their sudden attention.
"What?" he asks.
"We came up with a plan," Mulder tells him.
Jarod looks from Mulder to Lyle and then back to Mulder again,
wondering what the two of them managed to cook up.
"Something tells me that Parker and Dana won't like it very
much," Jarod says.
"They won't," Lyle sighs. "They won't like it at all. But it's
something that must be done. And it must be done now - before
it's too late.
To be continued . . .