--part 14--
I'll shed tears for you… just once more…
The songs of the morning birds broke the silence between the cold air. Rukawa looked through the window, everything was white. Snows still falling down from the sky as the layers of white ice around thickens. It's winter, and winter holiday finally started. Today Sendoh'll be buried, and everybody'll be coming. Now even though Sakuragi had finally revived the joy inside his heart, he still can't bear losing Sendoh. He refused to attend today's ceremony, it'll be too hard for him.
Rukawa rolled out of bed and breathed the air through his lungs. He realized that his room was very cold, even though he had worn 2 layers of sweaters for sleep. Perhaps the heater's not working properly. He'll have to check it later on this day. He exit the house and looked around. Everything was white as a feather. It seemed so peaceful. Then he noticed the plastic red flag of his mailbox was erecting. It means there's a letter inside it. Who would've possibly sent him a letter? He hadn't even received a letter even once. The raven-haired lad reached his hands inside the box and find a letter, saying : To Rukawa Kaede. Who might it be? He was filled with excitement. It was his first letter. Rukawa teared the envelope seal and took the letter out.
//Dear, Kaede-chan…
I'm sorry to have left you for such a long time… There's a reason behind it. It's not that I don't love you anymore, it's just that me and To-san decided that we shouldn't fight in front of your face, it'll hurt you. Our relationship's getting worse and we decided to settle it in another place. Sorry, Kaede-chan. I hope those money that I've sent to your bank account is useful, and I hope you spend them wisely. Right now we're settled, our angst had subsided, and we decided to move back to meet you.
Kaede-chan, we're coming back as soon as possible, there'll be a lot of stories that I want to tell you. We missed you so much, we looked forward to meet you again and see how much you've grown. I hope you're turning up to be a well-mannered and gorgeous boy. We can't wait to see you again.
So goodbye for now and let's meet again!
With Love,
Ka-san and To-san from Italy//
"Ka-san… To-san…" He held the paper tight. He was so happy to hear from them, he could laugh out loud any moment from now. His parents who had been gone for such a long time is now coming back to him. How would they look now? It would be very exciting to hear the story from them. He smiled widely and jumped high.
"Oi, Rukawa… Why are you looking so happy?" Ayako was watching him all of the time. She never had seen Rukawa jumping high in happiness, and a wide smile painted on his lips.
"Aa… Sempai… I didn't know you were there…" He blushed, knowing that his act was simply childish and stupid.
"Gomen… Did I surprise you?" She shrugged. Rukawa shook his head and crumpled the letter into his pocket. "Can I come in?"
The lad only nodded and opened the door from him. He emerged into the room, followed by Ayako, his senior. "Wow, Rukawa-kun… Nice decorations…"
"I'll get you a tea, Sempai."
Ayako grabbed his arms. "No no no, it's unnessecary. I'm only here for a little talk, anyway. Sit, Rukawa…"
Rukawa obeyed her and sat down on the couch. The Shohoku basketball club manager examined Rukawa's face carefully, studying each points of it. "I'm sorry to hear Sendoh's death, it must've been hard for you, Rukawa…"
He didn't answer, he looked away from her eyes. "But it's better… He's free now… He didn't have to suffer anymore pain."
Was it true? He's free now? He didn't have to suffer anymore? How could she know? Was there a guarantee to her words?
"Anyways, today he's going to be buried in the Chizu memorial cemetery."
"Sempai I don't think I'll be coming?"
Ayako turned silent for a moment. "Why?"
"I just don't think I can…It'll be hard, people'll be crying over him that time. I don't think I'll manage to survive the pressure."
"But it'll be the last time you'll see him before he's buried."
"I know, Sempai… But I…"
Ayako stood up and patted his head. "Well, Rukawa… Think again, if that is what you feel then don't. I just want to remind you. I'll see you there, if you'll be coming, though…" She smiled for the last time and left the house.
***
It's 12.56 pm already, and the funeral will start at 1. Will he come or will he not? Guess not… But I feel like I need to come, otherwise I'll feel guilty.
Rukawa was sitting on a balcony, his eyes were blank. He paid no attention to the snow flakes that had been drifting before his very eyes. He was too busy thinking. Then a voice woke him up from deep thoughts.
"Oi, Kitsune!!" Rukawa stretched his neck and looked down. It was Sakuragi, all dressed in a dark tan shirt, a black shirt and pants. "Will you be coming to Smiley's funeral? Come on! It's getting late."
"Sakuragi Hanamichi…" Rukawa didn't move to change his clothes, instead he just sat there and watched him. "I don't think I'll be coming…"
"Of course you will, what do you mean you wont?! It's like disrespecting him!"
"But I don't think my mental is strong enough to attend… I'll break down and cry like a baby there…"
Hanamichi smiled. "Let it be your last… Cry all as you want there, and smile when you leave. You'll know how relieved you'll be after that. Trust me, Rukawa!"
"Okay… wait for me…" Rukawa rushed to his room to change his clothes and go with Sakuragi to the funeral. Inside his room, while changing, he smiled in comfort. He trusted Sakuragi, they're friends. "That's right… I can cry there… Everybody will… Then after that, I'll feel refreshed, there'll be no more worries… I don't have to cry anymore after that."
"Arigatou, Hanamichi… I'm glad I have a friend like you… I knew I'll always need you…"
a.n :: okay… this chap kinda sound dumb and uneeded . It sounded so… what… so… crappy, I know… . Neways, Rukawa's parent's coming back!!!! Can you imagine how happy he'll feel… And there'll be a surprise :)! Read on to the next chapter to follow on…
I'll shed tears for you… just once more…
The songs of the morning birds broke the silence between the cold air. Rukawa looked through the window, everything was white. Snows still falling down from the sky as the layers of white ice around thickens. It's winter, and winter holiday finally started. Today Sendoh'll be buried, and everybody'll be coming. Now even though Sakuragi had finally revived the joy inside his heart, he still can't bear losing Sendoh. He refused to attend today's ceremony, it'll be too hard for him.
Rukawa rolled out of bed and breathed the air through his lungs. He realized that his room was very cold, even though he had worn 2 layers of sweaters for sleep. Perhaps the heater's not working properly. He'll have to check it later on this day. He exit the house and looked around. Everything was white as a feather. It seemed so peaceful. Then he noticed the plastic red flag of his mailbox was erecting. It means there's a letter inside it. Who would've possibly sent him a letter? He hadn't even received a letter even once. The raven-haired lad reached his hands inside the box and find a letter, saying : To Rukawa Kaede. Who might it be? He was filled with excitement. It was his first letter. Rukawa teared the envelope seal and took the letter out.
//Dear, Kaede-chan…
I'm sorry to have left you for such a long time… There's a reason behind it. It's not that I don't love you anymore, it's just that me and To-san decided that we shouldn't fight in front of your face, it'll hurt you. Our relationship's getting worse and we decided to settle it in another place. Sorry, Kaede-chan. I hope those money that I've sent to your bank account is useful, and I hope you spend them wisely. Right now we're settled, our angst had subsided, and we decided to move back to meet you.
Kaede-chan, we're coming back as soon as possible, there'll be a lot of stories that I want to tell you. We missed you so much, we looked forward to meet you again and see how much you've grown. I hope you're turning up to be a well-mannered and gorgeous boy. We can't wait to see you again.
So goodbye for now and let's meet again!
With Love,
Ka-san and To-san from Italy//
"Ka-san… To-san…" He held the paper tight. He was so happy to hear from them, he could laugh out loud any moment from now. His parents who had been gone for such a long time is now coming back to him. How would they look now? It would be very exciting to hear the story from them. He smiled widely and jumped high.
"Oi, Rukawa… Why are you looking so happy?" Ayako was watching him all of the time. She never had seen Rukawa jumping high in happiness, and a wide smile painted on his lips.
"Aa… Sempai… I didn't know you were there…" He blushed, knowing that his act was simply childish and stupid.
"Gomen… Did I surprise you?" She shrugged. Rukawa shook his head and crumpled the letter into his pocket. "Can I come in?"
The lad only nodded and opened the door from him. He emerged into the room, followed by Ayako, his senior. "Wow, Rukawa-kun… Nice decorations…"
"I'll get you a tea, Sempai."
Ayako grabbed his arms. "No no no, it's unnessecary. I'm only here for a little talk, anyway. Sit, Rukawa…"
Rukawa obeyed her and sat down on the couch. The Shohoku basketball club manager examined Rukawa's face carefully, studying each points of it. "I'm sorry to hear Sendoh's death, it must've been hard for you, Rukawa…"
He didn't answer, he looked away from her eyes. "But it's better… He's free now… He didn't have to suffer anymore pain."
Was it true? He's free now? He didn't have to suffer anymore? How could she know? Was there a guarantee to her words?
"Anyways, today he's going to be buried in the Chizu memorial cemetery."
"Sempai I don't think I'll be coming?"
Ayako turned silent for a moment. "Why?"
"I just don't think I can…It'll be hard, people'll be crying over him that time. I don't think I'll manage to survive the pressure."
"But it'll be the last time you'll see him before he's buried."
"I know, Sempai… But I…"
Ayako stood up and patted his head. "Well, Rukawa… Think again, if that is what you feel then don't. I just want to remind you. I'll see you there, if you'll be coming, though…" She smiled for the last time and left the house.
***
It's 12.56 pm already, and the funeral will start at 1. Will he come or will he not? Guess not… But I feel like I need to come, otherwise I'll feel guilty.
Rukawa was sitting on a balcony, his eyes were blank. He paid no attention to the snow flakes that had been drifting before his very eyes. He was too busy thinking. Then a voice woke him up from deep thoughts.
"Oi, Kitsune!!" Rukawa stretched his neck and looked down. It was Sakuragi, all dressed in a dark tan shirt, a black shirt and pants. "Will you be coming to Smiley's funeral? Come on! It's getting late."
"Sakuragi Hanamichi…" Rukawa didn't move to change his clothes, instead he just sat there and watched him. "I don't think I'll be coming…"
"Of course you will, what do you mean you wont?! It's like disrespecting him!"
"But I don't think my mental is strong enough to attend… I'll break down and cry like a baby there…"
Hanamichi smiled. "Let it be your last… Cry all as you want there, and smile when you leave. You'll know how relieved you'll be after that. Trust me, Rukawa!"
"Okay… wait for me…" Rukawa rushed to his room to change his clothes and go with Sakuragi to the funeral. Inside his room, while changing, he smiled in comfort. He trusted Sakuragi, they're friends. "That's right… I can cry there… Everybody will… Then after that, I'll feel refreshed, there'll be no more worries… I don't have to cry anymore after that."
"Arigatou, Hanamichi… I'm glad I have a friend like you… I knew I'll always need you…"
a.n :: okay… this chap kinda sound dumb and uneeded . It sounded so… what… so… crappy, I know… . Neways, Rukawa's parent's coming back!!!! Can you imagine how happy he'll feel… And there'll be a surprise :)! Read on to the next chapter to follow on…