Monkey Business (v1.01, 7/21/01)
Chapter 1: A Monkey's Tail
By AllWhacked
Send C&C to allwhacked@hotmail.com
http://www.geocities.com/allwhacked/
"..." = verbal speech
'...' = thoughts
[...] = panda signs
--- Disclaimer ---
The characters of Ranma 1/2 belong to Rumiko Takakashi. All
other characters to appear are owned by their respective
owners. So in other words, I DO NOT own any of them unless
otherwise noted, so please don't sue me because I have Zero
money. Thank You.
--- Warning!!! ---
Anyway this is an Alterverse fanfic that may or may not have
severe x-over tendencies. I don't know at this point.
--- Note to Reader ---
Credit for the new title goes to Gregg Sharp aka.
Metroanime. Anyway, thanks Gregg.
--- End Note to Reader ---
*** Japan, 1986 ***
"Papa" chirped a five year old Ranma Saotome. The boy had
felt lonely ever since leaving his buddy Ucchan, and
combined with the recent mauling he received while training
in the catfist, chiba-Ranma understandably needed something
to cheer him up. Looking at his father who was roasting
their meal over the campfire, Ranma continued.
"Papa... Papa!" squawked the boy. The slightly raised tone
alerted the father as he turned to face his son. Looking at
the boy, Genma couldn't help but feel proud of his son. In
his mind, Ranma was progressing well with the art and
although the boy had 'learned' the catfist, the subsequent
side effects were something he wished he had known before
hand. Shaking his head slightly at his own failure, Genma
gave his son his full attention, while subconsciously
rotating the slab of meat that roasted over the campfire's
flames.
Seeing that he had gained his father's attention, Ranma
began: "Papa. Can you tell me the story of Son Gokuu.
Please!!" pleaded the boy.
For Genma, he could only roll his eyes as he smiled
inwardly. The story of Son Gokuu was an ancient tale that
came from China. It was a fabulous tale mixed with Martial
Arts and Magic that when Genma was young himself had filled
his mind with the same wonderment and awe that was obviously
running through Ranma's adolescent head. Knowing the
legends and tales by heart, Genma began to reiterate his
knowledge as a gleam of giddy delight crossed over Ranma's
eyes.
++++++++++
Long ago there existed a monkey who was born of primal chaos
and hatched from a stone egg that was impregnated by the
sky. The monkey ruled over a kingdom of monkeys on a remote
island and then named himself Handsome Monkey King. One
day, an elderly monkey passed away and this prompted the
Handsome Monkey King to leave the island, deciding that he
needed to search for a way to become immortal.
The Handsome Monkey King traveled through the lands of
humans, and finally he found a mountain where a Taoist
priest took him on as a disciple. The Monkey proved a very
adept student at martial arts, magical transformations, and
cloud dancing, the last art enabling him to leap thousands
of miles with in a single jump.
Although the Handsome Monkey King proved to be an excellent
student in the arts, he was still a monkey and was
mischievous. Ultimately, it was his mischievous nature that
finally led the Taoist master to expel him for showing off.
Leaving the Taoist Priest, Handsome Monkey King returned
back to his island and destroyed the monsters that had taken
up residence there. From his victories, Monkey grew
arrogant and soon turned his eyes towards heaven, believing
himself as powerful as the gods. He then named himself The
Great Sage, the Equal of Heaven and demanded that the Jade
Emperor recognize him as such. The Jade Emperor, realizing
Monkey's power granted the Monkey his request and appointed
monkey the position as Pi Ma-Wen--a title meaning stable
boy.
At first, Monkey was pleased by the title and happily
performed his role until he found out it was a menial job
and that all the other gods were laughing at him. Enraged
at this insult, Monkey disrupted the activities of heaven,
stealing and eating immortality granting peaches meant for a
festival and consuming immortality pills prepared by Lao
Tsu.
After disrupting Heaven, Monkey fled back to his island and
established various defenses as the gods pursued him.
Embattled, he and his army of monkeys held off the heavenly
forces who had on several occasions had to flee and wait for
reinforcements. Finally, Lao Tsu, the Boddhisattva Kuan
Shi-Yin, and the Deveraja family were able to subdue Monkey.
Once captured, the Jade Emperor tried to have Monkey
executed but Monkey possessed a head made of bronze and
shoulders made of iron, thus breaking many a sword that used
to fell him.
Unable to kill the Monkey King, the Jade Emperor placed
Monkey in Lao Tsu's cauldron to be exterminated, however the
imprisonment in the cauldron only refined the monkey;
causing his eyes to become diamond hard and turning his
pupils flaming red. Ultimately, the cauldron could not hold
the Monkey King and he leapt out to cause havoc in heaven
once more. With Monkey on the loose again, the Jade Emperor
petitioned Buddha himself to aid them and Buddha responded
by waging a contest with Monkey. The goal of the contest
was for Monkey to escape Buddha's hand.
Monkey accepted the challenge and traveled for much time,
ultimately landing at what he thought was the edge of the
universe. By the edge he found five pillars and marked one
of the pillars to prove to Buddha that he had traveled to
the edge of the universe. When Monkey informed Buddha that
he had won the bet, Buddha informed Monkey that he had yet
to leave his hand, and promptly showed Monkey that the area
that he marked was in fact one of his fingers. Losing the
contest, Monkey was then trapped under a mountain and
tormented for 500 years.
At the end of the 500 years, Kuan Shi-Yin organized Monkey's
release and appointed the repentant monkey to be the
bodyguard for the holy monk, Tripitaka in his travels from
China to the Western Heaven where he was to receive the
scriptures of the sutras from Buddha himself. The task for
being Tripitaka bodyguard was to be a difficult task,
because Tripitaka had practiced a virtuous life of
cultivation for his last ten incarnations. That meant that
to eat his flesh would grant immortality to monsters and
therefore made the monk a constant target for demonic
attacks.
However, by then, Monkey had acquired and developed vast
amounts of powers that made him into a formidable bodyguard.
Monkey knew the way of 72 transformations and he was able to
change his body into anything from the size of a flea to
that of a massive giant. In addition, each of his hairs
could be transformed as well. The technique he developed
allowed him to pull a few of his hairs and then by chewing
them up and spitting them out, he could produce an army of
copies of himself.
Aside from that, he could disguise himself as any creature
he had met, and only gods with very keen vision could see
through his false form. In conjunction, Monkey too
possessed very keen vision that would allow him to see
through anyone's false form. His vision was so keen that he
could spot a disguised monster from up to 10,000 miles away
during the day. Beyond his talent for duplicating himself
and seeing through the disguises of monsters, Monkey was an
extremely skilled martial artist and with his knowledge of
cloud dancing, he was able to cover massive distances in a
very short time.
In conjunction with his martial arts training, he also
possessed a magic weapon, whom which he had won from the
Dragon Kings of the ocean. He called this weapon his
Compliant Rod and it was a shape-shifting stave of metal
which was reported to have weighed more than 13,000 pounds.
Because the stave could change shape, Monkey often condensed
his Compliant Rod to the size of a toothpick and wore it
behind his ear. Despite being able to shrink to the size of
a toothpick, the rod was capable of becoming thicker than a
battle staff, and could even produce multiple copies of
itself at Monkey's command.
At the height of Monkey's power, he wore a suit of golden
armor that he bullied out of the Dragon Kings. But after
his imprisonment he wore silk garments given to him by Kuan
Shi-Yin, and a tiger pelt tied around his waist. But
despite his great power, he did posses a few weaknesses. He
was afraid of smoke after being cooked in the cauldron, and
so any smoke of any kind made his hard eyes water. Monkey
was also a poor fighter underwater and so his opponents
would often flee into lakes or rivers to escape his wrath.
Beyond this, Monkey was also very poor at meditating due to
his monkey nature and so was completely unable to sit still.
But his greatest weakness was the iron crown on his head
that was imposed upon him by Kuan Shi-Yin. Whenever a
certain spell was recited, the crown would constrict and
crush Monkey's head.
Monkey kept watch over the monk for nearly the entire
journey, becoming Tripitaka's disciple, along with Chu Pa-
Chieh, The Sha Monk, and the Dragon Horse. During the
journey, Monkey had to face many monsters, some of which
were former allies from his own monstrous past. Finally the
scriptures were recovered, and Monkey was renamed Sun Wu-
Kung and was made the Buddha of Victory Through Strife. [1]
++++++++++
As Genma finished telling the tale of Sun Wu-Kung, he
watched his son take on a semi-serious look. Seeing his son
finally focus back onto him, he listened as the boy spoke.
"Papa. When I grow up I want to be good as Son Gokuu. I
want to be the best just like him."
Hearing the boy's vow, Genma could only smile at that.
Despite the failure and trauma of the catfist, Ranma was
still his son and still willing to become what he himself
had always wanted--to be the very best. Seeing Ranma begin
to eye their meal, Genma replied: "Don't worry son. If you
do as I tell you and practice the art, there is no doubt in
my mind that you will be no greater that Son Gokuu."
With that statement, Ranma could only beam as he dreamed of
becoming that fabled hero of legend.
*** Nerima, Japan the Present ***
It was a rainy day in Nerima, Japan as Soun Tendo sat alone
in the veranda of his household. With tears in his eyes and
clutching a post card with the picture of a panda eating
bamboo on one side, Soun was ecstatic with joy. 'Soon' he
thought. 'Soon, our dream to unite the two schools will
finally be realized.'
Seeing his middle daughter, Nabiki out of the corner of his
eye, he called his daughter over and informed her to gather
her other two sisters for a family meeting. After informing
Nabiki, Soun sat in contemplation as he thought of the best
way to break the wonderful news.
*** In the Tendo Dojo ***
Akane had finished with her morning jog and was now in the
act of one of her favorite past times--breaking stuff. With
a mighty "Kiyaah" Akane raised her fist to her hip and while
in a deep horse stance, she then shifted her weight and in a
swift motion brought her fist down in a mighty blow,
breaking the offending stone block.
Staring at her accomplishment, she was startled by the
entrance of her elder sister, Nabiki. Seeing that she was
wanted, she listened as Nabiki began to belittle her martial
arts talent; explaining that all the boys thought that she
was weird because of it. 'Those Perverted Bakas' Akane
angrily thought to herself. 'What would they know!?' She
contemplated voicing her displeasure but kept her tongue in
check and replied more diplomatically with: "you know, the
whole world doesn't revolve around boys!"
Rolling her eyes, Nabiki then smirked in a way that told
Akane that her sister knew something that she didn't. Often
a precursor to bad things she also noted. Listening
intently, Nabiki began to relay their father's latest good
news.
*** Raining Streets of Nerima ***
"...Growf Growf..."
"You know Pop, you shouldn't be complaining. It's your own
damn fault for going to Jusenkyo and getting yourself cursed
in the first place."
"Growf"
"Yeah yeah. Your fur is all wet, I know. Believe me I
know. I mean, you might be the one to wear it, but I'm the
one stuck with smelling your stink-ass since we left China."
Genma-Panda could only stare at his Ranma as he contemplated
whether or not to belt his son in order to teach him to
respect his father. Seeing Ranma stare down at him with
those cursed red eyes of his, he knew that to do so was
futile. Staring back down in defeat, he let out another sad
"growf."
"Don't be such a stick in the mud Pop. I mean, sure you got
cursed to be a panda but at least my curse is kinda cool.
Not only do I turn into Son Gokuu, but if what the guide and
Cologne-sensei said were true, I should be able to emulate
some of his powers."
Genma-Panda perked up at that. Being depressed about his
own curse, he forgotten all about the benefits that his son
received from falling into Spring of Drowned Sun Wu-Kung.
Thinking silently to himself, he thanked the Kami that
Jusenkyo proved to be not a total waste... not like that
'Catfist' training.
Whipping out a sign from 'Panda Space' Genma wrote on the
small wooden sign: [Son, we should be nearing the Tendo Dojo
of Anything Goes Martial Arts.]
At that proclamation, Ranma replied: "Oh, are we here to
challenge the school? No problem" he began to crack his
knuckles in anticipation of testing his new body.
[What? No, the Tendo Dojo belongs to my long time friend,
Soun Tendo. We'll be staying there for some time.]
Ranma looked on with a puzzled expression and then replying
in an incredulous tone: "What!? You... you have a friend
Pop?"
The jab at Genma's esteem was rewarded with an angry "growf"
and the following: [Oh course I have a friend, you cheeky
boy! Now I want you on your best behavior. That curse of
yours makes you a bit mischievous and I don't want you
screwing things up!] 'especially since Soun will soon
become your father-in-law' Genma mentally added.
"Oh well in that case, maybe we should hurry so we can get
out of the rain then."
Genma-Panda thought for a second and smiled a mischievous
panda smile. While bringing his paws together and gently
rattling his digits together he thought to himself in a
Burns like manner: 'Excellent, soon you'll meet one of
Tendo's daughters and then it'll be love at first sight,
followed by a quick marriage, and then a long early
retirement at my child's suffering, bwahahaha.'
While Genma-Panda had suddenly stopped in his tracks, Ranma
had a dubious expression on his face as he watched his
father pull off a patented 'mad scientist' maniacal laugh
while in his Panda form--a sight that proved most
disconcerting to the pigtailed martial artist.
Not knowing what to do and losing interest quite quickly,
Ranma shrugged his shoulder and thought that perhaps he
wasn't the only one whose mind was affected by their
Jusenkyo curse.
*** Back at the Ranch ***
"China!? Ooh, how exotic."
"China! Big deal. That doesn't automatically make him any
good!"
"Father, what is he like?"
"Yeah Daddy! What is he like?."
Soun, who listened to the exchange of words immediately took
on a stoic and faraway look. The impression that he was
giving his daughters portrayed that the Tendo patriarch had
known Ranma for quite some time--perhaps their father had
actually thought something through for once. However that
wasn't to be, because as the three daughters inched closer
to their father, waiting for him to continue, they were
jolted in shock as Soun replied in an even tone.
"I haven't a clue."
"..."
"Not a clue!? As in you have no idea, you haven't met this
boy?"
"That is correct, daughters. I've never even set eyes on
him."
"You mean you've never even seen this boy we're to marry?"
replied Soun's middle daughter. She obviously needed
confirmation, because her ears couldn't believer what she
just heard.
Receiving a nod followed by some nervous chuckling, the
other two Tendo daughter's responded.
In a disapproving tone, Soun's eldest daughter, Kasumi
voiced: "Oh Father" her head began to shake from side to
side at her father's foolish actions.
While Kasumi remained relatively calm, his youngest
daughter, Akane began to froth at the mouth like a rabid
dog. "Oh just friggin fantastic! Thanks a lot dad! You
just ruined our lives and to top it off, I'm sure you
probably engaged us to some hentai pervert." She then
proceeded to give her father an angry stare that promised
that crazy sucka(Soun) massive pain. However, despite her
best Mr. T impression, her efforts to give Soun the evil eye
went on blind eyes as a knock was heard from the front door.
With the interruption, Nabiki immediately got up and made a
bee line to the door. 'It must be our fiancé' she thought.
Despite wearing an attractive formal kimono, the cumbersome
dress did not seem to impede her movement as she beat her
father to the door. Following close behind, Soun who was
beginning to feel the heat in the room go up a few notches
was also anxious to meet his future son-in-law as well as
his friend, Genma. As the two reached the front door and
opened it, they were greeted with the shock of their life.
Soun screamed like a frightened school girl and backpedaled
out of the hallway while his daughter looked at her father
with mild embarrassment and disgust. Quickly ignoring her
father's rather cowardly/un-masculine behavior, her swift
mind returned to the problem at hand. Looking at the front
door, she was greeted by the sight of a large panda standing
up on its hind legs. Not sure what to do next, she too
followed suit after her father.
Turning the corner she caught site of the concerned looks
from her other two siblings. The first one to speak was
Akane.
"What's the matter?"
Soun was still gibbering like Scooby Doo while Nabiki
regained her composure. As everyone stood either stunned or
puzzled, in walked a large intimidating panda. Seeing the
beast and its negative affect on her family, Akane
immediately started feeling her urge to kill rising.
Whispering loud enough for her sisters and consequently
Genma-Panda to hear, she began:
"You two keep that panda occupied, while I run back and
fetch the family honor blade. When that thing isn't looking
"pow!" one dead sucka-panda." The other two girls nodded
their heads in understanding, while Genma-panda eyes bugged
out.
Genma-Panda immediately went to 'Panda Space' to retrieve
his marker and sign, while Kasumi replied: "But sister,
aren't pandas endangered? Perhaps it's a bit harsh to kill
it."
With his sensitive ears, Genma picked that last bit from
Kasumi and hastily wrote: [That's correct girl, listen to
your sister. You don't want to kill me. (flip sign) After
all, I'm just a cute cuddly panda and an endangered species
too.]
The three Tendo sisters looked at the panda in shock and
three separate lines of thought went into play that were
coincidentally voiced out.
"My, what a well trained panda" began Kasumi.
Licking her lips, Nabiki replied: "No kidding sis, I wonder
how much a trained panda like that could fetch from a
circus?"
In contrast to the other two, Akane responded with: "That's
no panda, it's a youma and as the self proclaimed champion
of feminism and martial arts, I'm Sailor Akane Tendo and in
the name of the Tendo Dojo I'll punish you." Doing what she
thought was a fancy sentai pose to cap off her speech, to
onlookers her stance reminded them more of a crab than the
graceful crane she had envisioned. Promptly falling over
due to a lack of balance, everyone including the panda sweat
dropped.
Regaining his bearings, Genma wrote: [Hi, I'm Genma Saotome
and I'm looking for Soun Tendo.]
*** Blink Blink ***
Soun, who broke out of his shock replied: "Genma?... is that
really you?" Receiving a nod from the Panda, Soun went into
tears. "Wahh!! My good friend Genma has died and his
spirit has taken possession of this innocent panda.
Waahh!!"
Seeing his friend breakdown and immediately jump to such a
stupid conclusion, Genma could only shake his head while
signing: [Just please get me some hot water and I'll
explain.]
In the mean time, Kasumi replied: "Oh, I guess I better call
a priest and order an exorcism." Soun didn't respond, he
was too worked up mourning his friends death while Akane and
Nabiki just stared in further shock. Before Kasumi could
leave to make a phone call, another knock was heard at the
from door. Being the only one who seemed to be coherent
enough to move, Kasumi was the one to greet their newest
guest.
Making her way around the corner, she caught sight of a dark
shadowy figure. There, standing in the doorway was
something she thought akin to that of a demon. She knew the
figure was male, and as the light from the hallway mixed in
with the evening's black, the limited illumination served
only to highlight glistening white teeth and cause his red
eyes to glow in an eerie shine.
For a brief second, Kasumi was too afraid to move. However,
before her knees had a chance to buckle in fright, her
forward momentum had carried her the necessary distance to
realize that her demon spawn was in fact a handsome young
man.
Quickly assessing this stranger, she estimated his height to
be shy of 6 feet, and as indicated by how his rain soaked
clothes clung to him, he also possessed quite a nice
athletic build. As she neared enough to take in his facial
features, she felt a lump in her throat and her heart
palpitate a few beats quicker. "Oh my" was all that escaped
her lips.
Staring off in fantasy land, Kasumi couldn't help but marvel
at the young man's friendly smile; with his perfect teeth,
his smile was inviting, invoking in Kasumi the feeling of
warmth and compassion from the man. As her gaze moved
upwards, past his perfect lips and nose, she came across his
flaming red eyes.
Something seemed unnatural to her, but it no longer brought
up feelings of dread and fear she had initially felt.
Kasumi knew that the eyes were said to be the window to
one's soul. With that in mind, she gathered that this
stranger's flaming red pupils talked of a charismatic
individual who had probably lived a chaotic and exciting
life.
While in the midst of her own fantasy, so caught up was
Kasumi that she didn't catch herself staring. And
furthermore, failed to acknowledge the stranger as he began
to wave a hand in front of her glazed over eyes and voiced
queries of concern. Finally feeling a light tap on the
shoulder, Kasumi broke out of her dream state and admonished
herself for being so rude. Making her introductions, Kasumi
began...
"I'm sorry, but can I help you, sir?"
"Why yes? Um, excuse me miss, but my name is Ranma Saotome
and... (sigh) I know this might sound odd, but didja see a
large panda come by here by any chance?"
Kasumi only stared as a blush formed over her cheeks, giving
her a rosy but cute complexion. "Oh my" she said softly.
In her mind: 'Saotome? This is my, I mean our fiancée?'
When Kasumi had initially been informed by her father, she
was quite concerned that she would be forced to marry some
young child. She had heard that when arranged marriages
were more common in Japan, often it took families some time
to produce a male heir and often a young woman found herself
married to an adolescent child--being more of a mother than
wife to her husband.
Looking at the boy, or rather she mentally chided "young
man" standing before her, her earlier concerns and fears
were assuaged. Thinking: 'he seems quite mature and (blush)
developed' as her eyes began to roam once again over his
chest and how his rain soaked shirt clung to him like a
second skin.
'Oh my, with those Chinese clothes and that umber sash, he
looks quite roguish. Like one of those heroes in those
Chinese epics I used to read.' Smiling to her guest, but in
reality smiling more to herself, Kasumi began to reply some
more while leading the young man out of the rain and into
the parlor with the rest of her family.
"Saotome-san, yes a panda did come by her not more than a
few minutes ago. In fact your panda is in the parlor with
father and my two sisters. Please, if you would follow me I
can you lead you to him." Taking a step back, the young man
introduced as Ranma consented.
"Thank you, um... I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name."
"Don't be, Saotome-san. It's really my fault for forgetting
to introduce myself. I'm Kasumi Tendo. If you could put
your shoes there, you can follow me." Ranma smiled as she
said that.
"Thank you very much Tendo-san. But you can just call me
Ranma." Seeing Ranma's ever present smile, she replied in
kind. "Okay Ranma. Then please call me Kasumi."
++++++++++
--- Notes ---
[1] I just wanted to note that I got my information from
Encyclopedia Mythica from an article written by Darrell E.
Hayhurst III. Its link is at:
http://www.pantheon.org/mythica/articles/s/sun_wu-kung.html
--- Q & A ---
Q1: Wasn't the Monkey King's name, Sun Wu-Kung and not Son
Gokuu?
A1: Yeah it is, but that's the Chinese pronunciation. In
Japanese it Son Gokuu if you didn't already know.
--- CC&S ---
Send Comments, Criticisms, or Suggestions to
allwhacked@hotmail.com Also if you're going to flame me, at
least give me a reason besides "it sucks" or "you can't
write sh*t." Thanks.
Chapter 1: A Monkey's Tail
By AllWhacked
Send C&C to allwhacked@hotmail.com
http://www.geocities.com/allwhacked/
"..." = verbal speech
'...' = thoughts
[...] = panda signs
--- Disclaimer ---
The characters of Ranma 1/2 belong to Rumiko Takakashi. All
other characters to appear are owned by their respective
owners. So in other words, I DO NOT own any of them unless
otherwise noted, so please don't sue me because I have Zero
money. Thank You.
--- Warning!!! ---
Anyway this is an Alterverse fanfic that may or may not have
severe x-over tendencies. I don't know at this point.
--- Note to Reader ---
Credit for the new title goes to Gregg Sharp aka.
Metroanime. Anyway, thanks Gregg.
--- End Note to Reader ---
*** Japan, 1986 ***
"Papa" chirped a five year old Ranma Saotome. The boy had
felt lonely ever since leaving his buddy Ucchan, and
combined with the recent mauling he received while training
in the catfist, chiba-Ranma understandably needed something
to cheer him up. Looking at his father who was roasting
their meal over the campfire, Ranma continued.
"Papa... Papa!" squawked the boy. The slightly raised tone
alerted the father as he turned to face his son. Looking at
the boy, Genma couldn't help but feel proud of his son. In
his mind, Ranma was progressing well with the art and
although the boy had 'learned' the catfist, the subsequent
side effects were something he wished he had known before
hand. Shaking his head slightly at his own failure, Genma
gave his son his full attention, while subconsciously
rotating the slab of meat that roasted over the campfire's
flames.
Seeing that he had gained his father's attention, Ranma
began: "Papa. Can you tell me the story of Son Gokuu.
Please!!" pleaded the boy.
For Genma, he could only roll his eyes as he smiled
inwardly. The story of Son Gokuu was an ancient tale that
came from China. It was a fabulous tale mixed with Martial
Arts and Magic that when Genma was young himself had filled
his mind with the same wonderment and awe that was obviously
running through Ranma's adolescent head. Knowing the
legends and tales by heart, Genma began to reiterate his
knowledge as a gleam of giddy delight crossed over Ranma's
eyes.
++++++++++
Long ago there existed a monkey who was born of primal chaos
and hatched from a stone egg that was impregnated by the
sky. The monkey ruled over a kingdom of monkeys on a remote
island and then named himself Handsome Monkey King. One
day, an elderly monkey passed away and this prompted the
Handsome Monkey King to leave the island, deciding that he
needed to search for a way to become immortal.
The Handsome Monkey King traveled through the lands of
humans, and finally he found a mountain where a Taoist
priest took him on as a disciple. The Monkey proved a very
adept student at martial arts, magical transformations, and
cloud dancing, the last art enabling him to leap thousands
of miles with in a single jump.
Although the Handsome Monkey King proved to be an excellent
student in the arts, he was still a monkey and was
mischievous. Ultimately, it was his mischievous nature that
finally led the Taoist master to expel him for showing off.
Leaving the Taoist Priest, Handsome Monkey King returned
back to his island and destroyed the monsters that had taken
up residence there. From his victories, Monkey grew
arrogant and soon turned his eyes towards heaven, believing
himself as powerful as the gods. He then named himself The
Great Sage, the Equal of Heaven and demanded that the Jade
Emperor recognize him as such. The Jade Emperor, realizing
Monkey's power granted the Monkey his request and appointed
monkey the position as Pi Ma-Wen--a title meaning stable
boy.
At first, Monkey was pleased by the title and happily
performed his role until he found out it was a menial job
and that all the other gods were laughing at him. Enraged
at this insult, Monkey disrupted the activities of heaven,
stealing and eating immortality granting peaches meant for a
festival and consuming immortality pills prepared by Lao
Tsu.
After disrupting Heaven, Monkey fled back to his island and
established various defenses as the gods pursued him.
Embattled, he and his army of monkeys held off the heavenly
forces who had on several occasions had to flee and wait for
reinforcements. Finally, Lao Tsu, the Boddhisattva Kuan
Shi-Yin, and the Deveraja family were able to subdue Monkey.
Once captured, the Jade Emperor tried to have Monkey
executed but Monkey possessed a head made of bronze and
shoulders made of iron, thus breaking many a sword that used
to fell him.
Unable to kill the Monkey King, the Jade Emperor placed
Monkey in Lao Tsu's cauldron to be exterminated, however the
imprisonment in the cauldron only refined the monkey;
causing his eyes to become diamond hard and turning his
pupils flaming red. Ultimately, the cauldron could not hold
the Monkey King and he leapt out to cause havoc in heaven
once more. With Monkey on the loose again, the Jade Emperor
petitioned Buddha himself to aid them and Buddha responded
by waging a contest with Monkey. The goal of the contest
was for Monkey to escape Buddha's hand.
Monkey accepted the challenge and traveled for much time,
ultimately landing at what he thought was the edge of the
universe. By the edge he found five pillars and marked one
of the pillars to prove to Buddha that he had traveled to
the edge of the universe. When Monkey informed Buddha that
he had won the bet, Buddha informed Monkey that he had yet
to leave his hand, and promptly showed Monkey that the area
that he marked was in fact one of his fingers. Losing the
contest, Monkey was then trapped under a mountain and
tormented for 500 years.
At the end of the 500 years, Kuan Shi-Yin organized Monkey's
release and appointed the repentant monkey to be the
bodyguard for the holy monk, Tripitaka in his travels from
China to the Western Heaven where he was to receive the
scriptures of the sutras from Buddha himself. The task for
being Tripitaka bodyguard was to be a difficult task,
because Tripitaka had practiced a virtuous life of
cultivation for his last ten incarnations. That meant that
to eat his flesh would grant immortality to monsters and
therefore made the monk a constant target for demonic
attacks.
However, by then, Monkey had acquired and developed vast
amounts of powers that made him into a formidable bodyguard.
Monkey knew the way of 72 transformations and he was able to
change his body into anything from the size of a flea to
that of a massive giant. In addition, each of his hairs
could be transformed as well. The technique he developed
allowed him to pull a few of his hairs and then by chewing
them up and spitting them out, he could produce an army of
copies of himself.
Aside from that, he could disguise himself as any creature
he had met, and only gods with very keen vision could see
through his false form. In conjunction, Monkey too
possessed very keen vision that would allow him to see
through anyone's false form. His vision was so keen that he
could spot a disguised monster from up to 10,000 miles away
during the day. Beyond his talent for duplicating himself
and seeing through the disguises of monsters, Monkey was an
extremely skilled martial artist and with his knowledge of
cloud dancing, he was able to cover massive distances in a
very short time.
In conjunction with his martial arts training, he also
possessed a magic weapon, whom which he had won from the
Dragon Kings of the ocean. He called this weapon his
Compliant Rod and it was a shape-shifting stave of metal
which was reported to have weighed more than 13,000 pounds.
Because the stave could change shape, Monkey often condensed
his Compliant Rod to the size of a toothpick and wore it
behind his ear. Despite being able to shrink to the size of
a toothpick, the rod was capable of becoming thicker than a
battle staff, and could even produce multiple copies of
itself at Monkey's command.
At the height of Monkey's power, he wore a suit of golden
armor that he bullied out of the Dragon Kings. But after
his imprisonment he wore silk garments given to him by Kuan
Shi-Yin, and a tiger pelt tied around his waist. But
despite his great power, he did posses a few weaknesses. He
was afraid of smoke after being cooked in the cauldron, and
so any smoke of any kind made his hard eyes water. Monkey
was also a poor fighter underwater and so his opponents
would often flee into lakes or rivers to escape his wrath.
Beyond this, Monkey was also very poor at meditating due to
his monkey nature and so was completely unable to sit still.
But his greatest weakness was the iron crown on his head
that was imposed upon him by Kuan Shi-Yin. Whenever a
certain spell was recited, the crown would constrict and
crush Monkey's head.
Monkey kept watch over the monk for nearly the entire
journey, becoming Tripitaka's disciple, along with Chu Pa-
Chieh, The Sha Monk, and the Dragon Horse. During the
journey, Monkey had to face many monsters, some of which
were former allies from his own monstrous past. Finally the
scriptures were recovered, and Monkey was renamed Sun Wu-
Kung and was made the Buddha of Victory Through Strife. [1]
++++++++++
As Genma finished telling the tale of Sun Wu-Kung, he
watched his son take on a semi-serious look. Seeing his son
finally focus back onto him, he listened as the boy spoke.
"Papa. When I grow up I want to be good as Son Gokuu. I
want to be the best just like him."
Hearing the boy's vow, Genma could only smile at that.
Despite the failure and trauma of the catfist, Ranma was
still his son and still willing to become what he himself
had always wanted--to be the very best. Seeing Ranma begin
to eye their meal, Genma replied: "Don't worry son. If you
do as I tell you and practice the art, there is no doubt in
my mind that you will be no greater that Son Gokuu."
With that statement, Ranma could only beam as he dreamed of
becoming that fabled hero of legend.
*** Nerima, Japan the Present ***
It was a rainy day in Nerima, Japan as Soun Tendo sat alone
in the veranda of his household. With tears in his eyes and
clutching a post card with the picture of a panda eating
bamboo on one side, Soun was ecstatic with joy. 'Soon' he
thought. 'Soon, our dream to unite the two schools will
finally be realized.'
Seeing his middle daughter, Nabiki out of the corner of his
eye, he called his daughter over and informed her to gather
her other two sisters for a family meeting. After informing
Nabiki, Soun sat in contemplation as he thought of the best
way to break the wonderful news.
*** In the Tendo Dojo ***
Akane had finished with her morning jog and was now in the
act of one of her favorite past times--breaking stuff. With
a mighty "Kiyaah" Akane raised her fist to her hip and while
in a deep horse stance, she then shifted her weight and in a
swift motion brought her fist down in a mighty blow,
breaking the offending stone block.
Staring at her accomplishment, she was startled by the
entrance of her elder sister, Nabiki. Seeing that she was
wanted, she listened as Nabiki began to belittle her martial
arts talent; explaining that all the boys thought that she
was weird because of it. 'Those Perverted Bakas' Akane
angrily thought to herself. 'What would they know!?' She
contemplated voicing her displeasure but kept her tongue in
check and replied more diplomatically with: "you know, the
whole world doesn't revolve around boys!"
Rolling her eyes, Nabiki then smirked in a way that told
Akane that her sister knew something that she didn't. Often
a precursor to bad things she also noted. Listening
intently, Nabiki began to relay their father's latest good
news.
*** Raining Streets of Nerima ***
"...Growf Growf..."
"You know Pop, you shouldn't be complaining. It's your own
damn fault for going to Jusenkyo and getting yourself cursed
in the first place."
"Growf"
"Yeah yeah. Your fur is all wet, I know. Believe me I
know. I mean, you might be the one to wear it, but I'm the
one stuck with smelling your stink-ass since we left China."
Genma-Panda could only stare at his Ranma as he contemplated
whether or not to belt his son in order to teach him to
respect his father. Seeing Ranma stare down at him with
those cursed red eyes of his, he knew that to do so was
futile. Staring back down in defeat, he let out another sad
"growf."
"Don't be such a stick in the mud Pop. I mean, sure you got
cursed to be a panda but at least my curse is kinda cool.
Not only do I turn into Son Gokuu, but if what the guide and
Cologne-sensei said were true, I should be able to emulate
some of his powers."
Genma-Panda perked up at that. Being depressed about his
own curse, he forgotten all about the benefits that his son
received from falling into Spring of Drowned Sun Wu-Kung.
Thinking silently to himself, he thanked the Kami that
Jusenkyo proved to be not a total waste... not like that
'Catfist' training.
Whipping out a sign from 'Panda Space' Genma wrote on the
small wooden sign: [Son, we should be nearing the Tendo Dojo
of Anything Goes Martial Arts.]
At that proclamation, Ranma replied: "Oh, are we here to
challenge the school? No problem" he began to crack his
knuckles in anticipation of testing his new body.
[What? No, the Tendo Dojo belongs to my long time friend,
Soun Tendo. We'll be staying there for some time.]
Ranma looked on with a puzzled expression and then replying
in an incredulous tone: "What!? You... you have a friend
Pop?"
The jab at Genma's esteem was rewarded with an angry "growf"
and the following: [Oh course I have a friend, you cheeky
boy! Now I want you on your best behavior. That curse of
yours makes you a bit mischievous and I don't want you
screwing things up!] 'especially since Soun will soon
become your father-in-law' Genma mentally added.
"Oh well in that case, maybe we should hurry so we can get
out of the rain then."
Genma-Panda thought for a second and smiled a mischievous
panda smile. While bringing his paws together and gently
rattling his digits together he thought to himself in a
Burns like manner: 'Excellent, soon you'll meet one of
Tendo's daughters and then it'll be love at first sight,
followed by a quick marriage, and then a long early
retirement at my child's suffering, bwahahaha.'
While Genma-Panda had suddenly stopped in his tracks, Ranma
had a dubious expression on his face as he watched his
father pull off a patented 'mad scientist' maniacal laugh
while in his Panda form--a sight that proved most
disconcerting to the pigtailed martial artist.
Not knowing what to do and losing interest quite quickly,
Ranma shrugged his shoulder and thought that perhaps he
wasn't the only one whose mind was affected by their
Jusenkyo curse.
*** Back at the Ranch ***
"China!? Ooh, how exotic."
"China! Big deal. That doesn't automatically make him any
good!"
"Father, what is he like?"
"Yeah Daddy! What is he like?."
Soun, who listened to the exchange of words immediately took
on a stoic and faraway look. The impression that he was
giving his daughters portrayed that the Tendo patriarch had
known Ranma for quite some time--perhaps their father had
actually thought something through for once. However that
wasn't to be, because as the three daughters inched closer
to their father, waiting for him to continue, they were
jolted in shock as Soun replied in an even tone.
"I haven't a clue."
"..."
"Not a clue!? As in you have no idea, you haven't met this
boy?"
"That is correct, daughters. I've never even set eyes on
him."
"You mean you've never even seen this boy we're to marry?"
replied Soun's middle daughter. She obviously needed
confirmation, because her ears couldn't believer what she
just heard.
Receiving a nod followed by some nervous chuckling, the
other two Tendo daughter's responded.
In a disapproving tone, Soun's eldest daughter, Kasumi
voiced: "Oh Father" her head began to shake from side to
side at her father's foolish actions.
While Kasumi remained relatively calm, his youngest
daughter, Akane began to froth at the mouth like a rabid
dog. "Oh just friggin fantastic! Thanks a lot dad! You
just ruined our lives and to top it off, I'm sure you
probably engaged us to some hentai pervert." She then
proceeded to give her father an angry stare that promised
that crazy sucka(Soun) massive pain. However, despite her
best Mr. T impression, her efforts to give Soun the evil eye
went on blind eyes as a knock was heard from the front door.
With the interruption, Nabiki immediately got up and made a
bee line to the door. 'It must be our fiancé' she thought.
Despite wearing an attractive formal kimono, the cumbersome
dress did not seem to impede her movement as she beat her
father to the door. Following close behind, Soun who was
beginning to feel the heat in the room go up a few notches
was also anxious to meet his future son-in-law as well as
his friend, Genma. As the two reached the front door and
opened it, they were greeted with the shock of their life.
Soun screamed like a frightened school girl and backpedaled
out of the hallway while his daughter looked at her father
with mild embarrassment and disgust. Quickly ignoring her
father's rather cowardly/un-masculine behavior, her swift
mind returned to the problem at hand. Looking at the front
door, she was greeted by the sight of a large panda standing
up on its hind legs. Not sure what to do next, she too
followed suit after her father.
Turning the corner she caught site of the concerned looks
from her other two siblings. The first one to speak was
Akane.
"What's the matter?"
Soun was still gibbering like Scooby Doo while Nabiki
regained her composure. As everyone stood either stunned or
puzzled, in walked a large intimidating panda. Seeing the
beast and its negative affect on her family, Akane
immediately started feeling her urge to kill rising.
Whispering loud enough for her sisters and consequently
Genma-Panda to hear, she began:
"You two keep that panda occupied, while I run back and
fetch the family honor blade. When that thing isn't looking
"pow!" one dead sucka-panda." The other two girls nodded
their heads in understanding, while Genma-panda eyes bugged
out.
Genma-Panda immediately went to 'Panda Space' to retrieve
his marker and sign, while Kasumi replied: "But sister,
aren't pandas endangered? Perhaps it's a bit harsh to kill
it."
With his sensitive ears, Genma picked that last bit from
Kasumi and hastily wrote: [That's correct girl, listen to
your sister. You don't want to kill me. (flip sign) After
all, I'm just a cute cuddly panda and an endangered species
too.]
The three Tendo sisters looked at the panda in shock and
three separate lines of thought went into play that were
coincidentally voiced out.
"My, what a well trained panda" began Kasumi.
Licking her lips, Nabiki replied: "No kidding sis, I wonder
how much a trained panda like that could fetch from a
circus?"
In contrast to the other two, Akane responded with: "That's
no panda, it's a youma and as the self proclaimed champion
of feminism and martial arts, I'm Sailor Akane Tendo and in
the name of the Tendo Dojo I'll punish you." Doing what she
thought was a fancy sentai pose to cap off her speech, to
onlookers her stance reminded them more of a crab than the
graceful crane she had envisioned. Promptly falling over
due to a lack of balance, everyone including the panda sweat
dropped.
Regaining his bearings, Genma wrote: [Hi, I'm Genma Saotome
and I'm looking for Soun Tendo.]
*** Blink Blink ***
Soun, who broke out of his shock replied: "Genma?... is that
really you?" Receiving a nod from the Panda, Soun went into
tears. "Wahh!! My good friend Genma has died and his
spirit has taken possession of this innocent panda.
Waahh!!"
Seeing his friend breakdown and immediately jump to such a
stupid conclusion, Genma could only shake his head while
signing: [Just please get me some hot water and I'll
explain.]
In the mean time, Kasumi replied: "Oh, I guess I better call
a priest and order an exorcism." Soun didn't respond, he
was too worked up mourning his friends death while Akane and
Nabiki just stared in further shock. Before Kasumi could
leave to make a phone call, another knock was heard at the
from door. Being the only one who seemed to be coherent
enough to move, Kasumi was the one to greet their newest
guest.
Making her way around the corner, she caught sight of a dark
shadowy figure. There, standing in the doorway was
something she thought akin to that of a demon. She knew the
figure was male, and as the light from the hallway mixed in
with the evening's black, the limited illumination served
only to highlight glistening white teeth and cause his red
eyes to glow in an eerie shine.
For a brief second, Kasumi was too afraid to move. However,
before her knees had a chance to buckle in fright, her
forward momentum had carried her the necessary distance to
realize that her demon spawn was in fact a handsome young
man.
Quickly assessing this stranger, she estimated his height to
be shy of 6 feet, and as indicated by how his rain soaked
clothes clung to him, he also possessed quite a nice
athletic build. As she neared enough to take in his facial
features, she felt a lump in her throat and her heart
palpitate a few beats quicker. "Oh my" was all that escaped
her lips.
Staring off in fantasy land, Kasumi couldn't help but marvel
at the young man's friendly smile; with his perfect teeth,
his smile was inviting, invoking in Kasumi the feeling of
warmth and compassion from the man. As her gaze moved
upwards, past his perfect lips and nose, she came across his
flaming red eyes.
Something seemed unnatural to her, but it no longer brought
up feelings of dread and fear she had initially felt.
Kasumi knew that the eyes were said to be the window to
one's soul. With that in mind, she gathered that this
stranger's flaming red pupils talked of a charismatic
individual who had probably lived a chaotic and exciting
life.
While in the midst of her own fantasy, so caught up was
Kasumi that she didn't catch herself staring. And
furthermore, failed to acknowledge the stranger as he began
to wave a hand in front of her glazed over eyes and voiced
queries of concern. Finally feeling a light tap on the
shoulder, Kasumi broke out of her dream state and admonished
herself for being so rude. Making her introductions, Kasumi
began...
"I'm sorry, but can I help you, sir?"
"Why yes? Um, excuse me miss, but my name is Ranma Saotome
and... (sigh) I know this might sound odd, but didja see a
large panda come by here by any chance?"
Kasumi only stared as a blush formed over her cheeks, giving
her a rosy but cute complexion. "Oh my" she said softly.
In her mind: 'Saotome? This is my, I mean our fiancée?'
When Kasumi had initially been informed by her father, she
was quite concerned that she would be forced to marry some
young child. She had heard that when arranged marriages
were more common in Japan, often it took families some time
to produce a male heir and often a young woman found herself
married to an adolescent child--being more of a mother than
wife to her husband.
Looking at the boy, or rather she mentally chided "young
man" standing before her, her earlier concerns and fears
were assuaged. Thinking: 'he seems quite mature and (blush)
developed' as her eyes began to roam once again over his
chest and how his rain soaked shirt clung to him like a
second skin.
'Oh my, with those Chinese clothes and that umber sash, he
looks quite roguish. Like one of those heroes in those
Chinese epics I used to read.' Smiling to her guest, but in
reality smiling more to herself, Kasumi began to reply some
more while leading the young man out of the rain and into
the parlor with the rest of her family.
"Saotome-san, yes a panda did come by her not more than a
few minutes ago. In fact your panda is in the parlor with
father and my two sisters. Please, if you would follow me I
can you lead you to him." Taking a step back, the young man
introduced as Ranma consented.
"Thank you, um... I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name."
"Don't be, Saotome-san. It's really my fault for forgetting
to introduce myself. I'm Kasumi Tendo. If you could put
your shoes there, you can follow me." Ranma smiled as she
said that.
"Thank you very much Tendo-san. But you can just call me
Ranma." Seeing Ranma's ever present smile, she replied in
kind. "Okay Ranma. Then please call me Kasumi."
++++++++++
--- Notes ---
[1] I just wanted to note that I got my information from
Encyclopedia Mythica from an article written by Darrell E.
Hayhurst III. Its link is at:
http://www.pantheon.org/mythica/articles/s/sun_wu-kung.html
--- Q & A ---
Q1: Wasn't the Monkey King's name, Sun Wu-Kung and not Son
Gokuu?
A1: Yeah it is, but that's the Chinese pronunciation. In
Japanese it Son Gokuu if you didn't already know.
--- CC&S ---
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