14: Etiquette Lessons

"So what, exactly, are we gonna do here again?"

"Stop Tribby getting to the reception."

"Yeah." Josh felt the beginnings of a sinking feeling. "I was hoping for a little more detail there, Toby."

"That's because we're going to improvise. And when I say we, I mean me. You are going to do exactly what I tell you to."

"I'm the hired muscle?"

"Without the muscle part."

"Or the 'getting paid for it' part." Toby parked the car. "We're here," Josh observed unnecessarily.

"Remind me why the White House pays you anything at all?"

"They don't pay me very much."

"Get out of the car."

They both got out, and started towards the building. It was late for any staff less hard-working that those at the White House, but even so Josh couldn't help thinking it should be busier. "You're sure Tribby's going to be here?"

"I had Ginger call ahead to say there were a few last-minute concerns to discuss. He'll be here to meet us."

"Then where is everybody?"

"Probably at home. Not everybody makes their staff slave for them the way you do with Donna."

"Okay, that's the second time you've accused me of being an unreasonable boss. I'll have you know-" He cut off abruptly as they stepped inside the building and saw that all the lights were out. "Okay, why is-?"

His unfinished question was quickly answered as a number of bulky figures appeared and moved to encircle the two men. Bulky, vampire-faced figures.

Toby spoke quietly, not taking his eyes from the ring of grinning vampires. "It looks like Tribby's decided to palm us off on his aides after all."

"Good Lord." Giles pulled his glasses off and blinked as the six of them entered the room and flashbulbs went off. CJ smiled at him.

"Don't worry about it. It's just our friends in the press, killing time until the president arrives. I'd rather they come out of here with 'Press Secretary Arrives With Mysterious Englishman' than 'Agricultural Secretary Turns Into Snake, Eats Guests'."

"I think if that turns out to be the case, they'll, uh, they'll probably not be coming out of here with anything," Giles said dryly.

"True," CJ agreed. She brightened up. "Still, on the plus side, I could definitely get behind the press corps getting eaten by a giant snake."

"Indeed."

They joined the party.

Sam hovered a little awkwardly on the sidelines with Buffy. If this had been a real date, he would know what to do - actually, he'd been single for so long he wasn't sure that was entirely true, but still - but he wasn't too sure of the procedure for 'pretend date to disguise surveillance activities'. Josh might be the one with the hopeless poker face, but Sam was almost pathologically honest, and subterfuge of any kind didn't sit well with him.

It didn't help that his beautiful young companion was drawing the attention of quite a number of the men in the room. A few jealous glances didn't hurt his ego, but some of them gave Buffy the once-over in a deeply unpleasant way, and then smirked as if they expected him to be some kind of companion in their leering. Maybe he was just hyper-sensitive because of their current situation, but it made his flesh crawl.

One of them, a minor official Sam had never been fond of, made his way over to the two of them as they lurked. "My, this is a pretty young lady," he said, in a tone that made Sam want to punch him. "Wherever did you dig her up?"

Buffy smiled politely, perhaps unsure whether this was somebody they were allowed to offend.

"Buffy's in town with some mutual friends, and it seemed a shame for her to miss the reception," Sam said stiffly.

"Quite, quite," agreed the man with an obnoxious smirk. "Buffy, is it? That's an... interesting name." And Sam could quite clearly hear 'sounds like a call-girl name' in his patronising tone. That being something else he was hyper-sensitive to. "Well... Buffy... it's been a pleasure meeting you," the man said smarmily, offering her his hand.

Buffy took it politely - and then crushed his hand so hard that Sam saw the blood rush out of it. "Likewise," she said, smiling innocently as the man made desperate faces trying not to cry out.

She finally released him, and linked her arm through Sam's. "Shall we go get something to eat?"

They left the man behind them, trying to massage some feeling back into his hand.