Chapter II
Algebra Class - First Period
Legolas awoke to the bright sunlight shining in on his face. He squinted his eyes as he sat up. He looked around. He seemed to be in a strange room…perhaps it was some sort of convention, or a meeting of sorts. Perhaps a council? One man was standing in front of everybody, waving his hands madly as he scribbled numbers onto a white protrusion from the wall. There were nearly twenty people or so in the room, all sitting at small desks, some were writing things down, others were talking amongst themselves, others were sleeping, or nearly.
Legolas was sitting at a desk, near two other people. They looked like humans…only…weird. They had funny hair, funny clothing—then he looked down. He was wearing the same thing as everyone else! He was wearing a strange plaid skirt, a white collared shirt, white socks, and odd black and white shoes (which were really only half on). He jumped up with a shout. All the other funny human things looked up at him, including the man in front, whom Legolas presumed to be a king of some sort.
"Is there something wrong?" the man asked him.
"Agghhh!!!" Legolas shouted as he stared at the floor, "I'm short, too! Agghhh!!!"
"Jocelyn? Jocelyn?" the man inquired once more.
"It is a tragic day when Legolas Greenleaf, prince of Mirkwood, son of Thranduil is short!" Legolas cried indignantly.
"Jocelyn?!" the man shouted out of desperation.
Legolas looked up. "Why do you yell, your highness?" He looked around as he heard snickers and loud laughs from around him. Why were they laughing?
"Jocelyn, please sit down."
"What's a 'Jocelyn'?" More laughs, this time it was loud, belly laughter.
"Sit down."
This Legolas understood, so he plopped himself down onto the chair-like desk and began to sulk. The two other people sitting near him were trying to hold in their laughter, one dark-haired girl couldn't manage. She began to laugh loudly and uncontrollably.
Legolas looked at her, cocked his head sideways and asked her, "Why do you laugh?" This only made her laugh more.
"You…" she said between snickers.
He thought she spoke of how he was dressed, so he replied hotly, "I look just as stupid as you, so quiet, commoner!" She only laughed louder.
The "king" looked up at the girl, and she immediately stopped laughing (well, almost immediately).
"Lissette, Jocelyn, please stop talking," he said.
Legolas looked at the girl, her name must have been Jocelyn. So 'Jocelyn' is a name… thought Legolas. Wait! Then I must be Lissette! That's a woman's name! He wanted to jump up again, but he did not want to disturb the king, so he suppressed his panic. He sat in his desk, looking out the window, wanting to scream.
Gandalf said I would be a whole new person…but I didn't know he meant this new… Legolas pondered. All of a sudden he heard the name Lissette called by the king. He immediately hopped up.
"Yes, your majesty!"
The man looked surprised at this response. "Jocelyn, please sit down, and calm down."
Oh… Legolas thought, then I must be Jocelyn. Wait, is that a woman's name or a man's name? I've never heard it before. I supposed it's a man's name then. Gandalf would not have gone so far as to make me a woman! Phew!
The girl sitting across from him looked up at the protrusion from the wall which seemed to be a writing space and spoke a few strange numbers.
"x squared, y to the fourth," she said, pushing her spectacles further up the bridge of her nose.
I'm so glad I don't have glasses, Legolas thought to himself. Then, as he slowly moved his hand up to rub his eyes, he felt some barrier blocking the path to it. What is this? Some sort of force field? Oh, no! Glasses! I have glasses!
Legolas was nearly in a frenzy, he had to grip onto the edge of the table- desk-chair to keep from screaming. Instead, he let out a tiny whimper, but the king heard.
"Jocelyn, perhaps you can tell us the answer? What do you do to find the value of x?" the king asked.
"The value of x?" Legolas said, his eyes opening wide, "um…the value of x is…x. Correct?"
The king looked even more startled. "Well, yes, but I mean, in numbers."
Legolas let his eyes scroll across the writing surface. It was all foreign to him. Strange signs and letters mixed with numbers…it was all so confusing. Perhaps it is their language… he thought.
"5?" Legolas guessed.
"No," the king said, "think about it, what would it be if we wanted to find the square root of the quantity (x-3y)?"
"5?" Legolas guessed again.
"No…"
Okay, Legolas, he thought to himself, enough 5's, have to think of another number…
"35-30!" he shouted triumphantly, proud to have thought of another answer.
"No, that's still five," the king said, growing frustrated.
I have angered the king… Legolas said, becoming frightened.
"Kaitlin?" said the king, giving up on Legolas.
Legolas did not sit down at once, he did not know what a 'Kaitlin' was, or what it meant when he said it. He wasn't sure if it was some sort of command for punishment, or if it was an interjection. He remained standing, unsure of what was going on. Then he heard a voice behind him, he turned, and one of the girls he had been sitting with spoke up. This girl was tall, with shoulder-length blonde hair, and had no spectacles.
"Y is thirty two and after you plug it back into the equation, you can solve it for X and it's…" she looked down to consult her calculator (or what Legolas thought was some sort of animal), "fifty six!" she said.
Legolas sat down and used his excellent elven memory to remember these numbers. So Y is thirty two, and X is fifty six, he thought to himself. Then the king turned to him and asked him if he understood.
Legolas nodded. "Yes, your majesty."
The king gave him a strange look but resumed writing on the "wall." He wrote down another series of numbers and letters and then turned back to the elf.
"Okay, Jocelyn. What are the values of the quantities of X and Y?"
"X is fifty six, and Y is thirty two," he said triumphantly, evidently very pleased with himself.
The king shook his head, "No, look at the problem, Jocelyn."
"No? But you just established that X was fifty six and Y was thirty two, your highness."
"Please stop, Jocelyn. This 'your highness' thing is getting old. And please answer the question."
Legolas was now utterly confused. He thought he had already answered the question, and what did the king mean by " 'your highness' thing is getting old' "? Old?
"But you just said that the answer was fifty six and thirty two…" he said, furrowing his brow in frustration.
"This is a different question," the king explained.
Legolas became panicked. He had no idea what the king was talking about. He looked around him with wide, nervous eyes. What did he mean "different question?" Wasn't it the same question? He was asking for the values of X and Y, and Legolas thought he had given it to him. What a strange place, Legolas thought to himself, they ask the same questions twice. And what kind of questions are these, anyway? Why does the king want to know the values of letters? What kind of council is this?!
"It's the same question," Legolas reasoned finally, forcing his logic onto the others.
The king sighed, "No, look at the problem!" he exclaimed in exasperation and disbelief.
The elf focused as much as he could on the series of numbers and letters (which was pretty much gibberish to him), but he could not see anything. All of a sudden he had an idea. He picked up the nearest calculator to him and stared at it.
The girl looked at this odd creature and came up with the answer, perhaps it will tell me the answer also. He stared at it for thirty seconds, and everybody in the class watched him in silence, like they were observing some animal in a zoo.
Perhaps it's sleeping… Legolas poked at it a few times, and turned it on, though he thought he had awoken this "creature." Ah! It awakes!
The calculator screen was blank, so Legolas poked the calculator a few more times, hitting several random keys. He did not realize that everyone was focusing intently on him, amazed at his…weirdness. He had hit the buttons for the numbers five and six, and fifty six came onto the screen.
"Ah!" he shouted out loud, "success! I have proved myself correct. The answer is fifty-six, he told me so!" He pointed to the calculator.
The king put his head in his hands in despair. "Jocelyn, sit down," he begged, "please."
Legolas' pride was hurt, unable to control it any longer, he shouted out indignantly. "The answer is thirty-two and fifty-six! You told me so yourself, and then this…funny looking…creature confirmed it!"
"Jocelyn!" the king yelled, "either sit down or leave the room!"
"Why do you tell me the answer is thirty-two and fifty-six and then change your mind? How can X and Y have so many values? Why? Tell me! The sea is blue, grass is green, X is fifty-six, and Y is thirty-two! That's it! Why are you trying to confuse everybody?" Legolas was fuming.
"Please leave the room," the king said, finally losing all patience.
Legolas' face was hot as he spoke, "Fine. I know what you're up to. You're one of Saruman's conspirators! You're trying to confuse and hypnotize everyone!"
"Jocelyn!"
"I'm going, I'm going!" And then turning to the rest of the people, he said, "Don't believe him! He's evil!"
"For the last time, Jocelyn, leave the room or I will send you to Dr. Carey!"
"Don't say I didn't warn you!" he reprimanded the others, and then to the king he said sharply, "I'm watching you." Then with a quick huff, he stomped towards the door. Without another look at the rest of the people, he stormed indignantly out. He didn't hear (or chose not to hear) the incessant laughter as the door was closing behind him.
Once he was out, his confusion didn't cease. He was in a long corridor full of big doors and odd thin doors (lockers, but he didn't know that). What is this madness? he thought, Where am I? After a few moments of wandering up and down the halls, he figured it must have been a kingdom of some sort.
I'd better remember where I came from, so I can return later, even though I don't think that the king will gladly reprove my untimely exile. He looked at the door from which he had just come from. On it, it stated the numbers "205." It must be the name of the city. I'd better keep it in mind. He took a deep breath and exhaled. Not knowing where to go, he went to the right, towards the computer lab. The computer lab's door was the only door open, so he gladly stepped inside, eager for some guidance.
Of course, you must remember that Legolas had never seen a computer, and even with a machine as simple as the calculator, he was completely baffled. So you can imagine his wonderment when he saw a room filled with what he thought were "big animals." Most of the big animals were occupied, so he looked around for an free chair. Finding one, he sat down. The big animal in front of him was "asleep," so he poked it a couple of times and it woke up. He saw the other people put their hands on a strange tail-like thing protruding from the main bodice of the animal. He placed his hand on it as well. He then observed one girl putting a floppy disk into the hard drive, and his bafflement decreased.
It must be a food source of some kind. Perhaps they are feeding them? He looked around for something and saw a CD next to the keyboard (he thought the keys were the eyes of the animals, so you can understand his amazement when he saw people poking at the animal's eyes). Picking it up, he examined it thoroughly. Looks like a biscuit. Maybe it likes biscuits?
He tried to fit it inside the hard drive, but it wouldn't fit of course, so he broke it up into little pieces and "fed" them into the hard drive. There was a lot of shoving and pushing involved, but he finally got all the pieces inside. The screen of the monitor blinked several times, but then resumed its original state. Legolas, believing he had done the right thing, gave the monitor several pats on top of it, as if it was a dog.
It might be thirsty, he thought, after all, it just finished a meal. So he walked around looking for something to give to the computer-animal. He asked the girl next to him if she had something to drink, and she nodded suspiciously.
"What for?" she asked, eyeing him curiously.
"Can I borrow it for a second? Just really quickly, I only need a little bit," seeing her hesitation, he added, "it will take but a few moments. I won't use a lot."
She gave him a bottle of clear liquid. He untwisted the cap and sniffed at it, she watched him distrustfully. It smelled fizzy and sweet. He did not question her of the substance, he figured it was part of the diet of the computer-animal.
Legolas tilted the computer onto its back…or at least tried. He realized that his former strong elven muscles had wasted away to puny ones. He had trouble picking it up, but eventually he got it on its back. Then, pushing the flap of the hard drive open, he slowly poured the fizzy liquid into it. A split second later, he heard a shout from the girl next to him.
"What the fuck do you think you're doing?!" she shouted in disbelief.
"I'm fee-" he began, but he was cut off by strange crackling sounds coming from the computer. "Is it…supposed to do that?"
"No!" the girl said. People had begun to crowd around the sizzling computer in an entertained crowd.
All of a sudden, a lady stepped into the room, and seeing the crowd, demanded to know what had occurred. She had some problems being heard, but finally by the time she pushed through, she had already seen for herself. Legolas, scared and panicked, sneaked out in the clamor unseen, and left the crowd of girls huddling and shouting around the computer. He would let the other girl explain it all.
Well, how was I supposed to know it was going to get sick? he said, taking the blame for none of it whatsoever. As he was walking down to the other end of the corridor, he heard a low buzzing sound (which was the bell to signify the ending of first period), and almost immediately after, girls began scurrying out of the rooms. He noticed that most of them went straight off to what he thought were their houses (actually lockers) and placed their possessions inside. All of a sudden, he heard a loud yell from across the hall.
"JOBAS!" the voice shouted. Suddenly, someone jumped on him. He nearly fell down, even his elven balance had not prepared him for so violent an attack. He immediately regained his composition and got into a defending position, reading to ward off any blows.
The person who had jumped on him was a girl of about his height, with long, platinum blonde hair. She laughed. "Jobas, what are you doing?"
At the sight of her hair, Legolas let down his guard. She has the hair of an elf…is she an elf? he thought to himself. "Are you an elf?"
She laughed. "Ha! I wish. Come on, I have to show you the next chapter I wrote in my story!" she said, dragging him to her "house." She opened it and pulled a few sheets of paper out and handed them to him. "Read!" she commanded.
"Who are you?" he inquired, not quite tuned in to the fact she had just demanded he read her story.
"An Alex, what are you?" she said.
"Do I sense sarcasm?" he asked, his pride had already been hurt today, he was not going to let some common villager put him down.
"Aren't we bright?" she replied.
"Do I sense more sarcasm?"
"Wow, Jocelyn! You're just with it, today, aren't you?"
"With what?"
She laughed hysterically, but Legolas didn't see what was so funny. He blinked three times in rapid succession and continued staring at her.
"Come on," she said, "let's go get Lissette."
Lissette! he thought, I know who she is. But who is she? What's an 'Alex?' He threw a glance at the girl next to him.
She dragged him through the crowded hall to Lissette's house (locker). He recognized her as the girl with the dark hair who would not stop laughing at him.
"Jocelyn!" she said as she saw him, "What was going on with you today?"
Legolas' sense of pride was instilled once more in him. "Nothing, nothing at all. I just didn't agree with what the king was saying. I didn't understand all his values and X's and Y's and numbers."
"Like anybody does?" Lissette laughed, "Still, what did you have for breakfast? You were so completely insane!"
Breakfast… Legolas pondered. He had not had anything to eat in days, and the thought of a good elven breakfast made him even hungrier. "Nothing…I didn't have anything to eat."
"Whatever…" Lissette said.
Alex looked at Legolas and Lissette strangely, "What did she do?"
Lissette explained the whole thing, and Legolas clung onto the last shred of dignity he had bitterly. Every once in a while he interrupted with a few phrases, but that only made the two girls laugh even harder. He followed the two of them into the bathroom.
They were still laughing the whole time, and Legolas could not help but feel a little bit embarrassed. He remained standing next to a sink, playing with the funny knobs, watching in silent curiosity as water rushed out of the faucet as he twisted one of them. He turned around to find himself facing a mirror. He gaped in incredulity.
"So I am a girl?" he could not help but exclaim. Alex, who was waiting not too far away in the other corner of the restroom laughed as she stepped next to him so her own reflection appeared next to his.
"Well, I thought we had already established that, but of course I could be wrong," she said. She watched as Legolas walked up close and close to the mirror, opened his mouth, and examined his teeth.
"Wha…err…deez?" he asked, pulling his lips wide open to get a better look at the braces on his teeth.
Lissette laughed as she stepped out from a bathroom stall. "You've had them for a while, Jocelyn."
"Agghh!" he let out a frustrated groan as he picked at them with his fingernail.
"Those…are…braaaaces," Alex explained slowly, as if to a little child, "I…have…them…too."
But Legolas was not listening, he was too engrossed with his own problems as he let out a helpless cry. "They're not coming off! Agghh!" He kept pulling, but as he pulled, he felt it yank on his teeth, and the pain was annoying and made him want them off even more, so he pulled harder. Finally, he gave up. "It's hopeless!"
"Calm down," Lissette advised.
"Calm down? Calm down?!" he shouted, "I've got things invading my teeth!"
Alex and Lissette became worried. "Jocelyn," Alex began, "are you sure you're okay? You've been acting pretty weird lately. And you haven't even read my story!"
Legolas couldn't take it anymore. He took off his right shoe which had not been completely on his foot and threw it across the restroom door. At that exact moment as he was letting go of the shoe, a short-haired, blonde lady walked through, and the shoe missed her face by an inch. Lissette and Alex immediately turned around and hid their face towards the wall, trying not to laugh. Legolas remained sulking in the corner.
"Shoes!" the lady started, "I mean, Jocelyn! What have I told you about your shoes! I'm sick of telling you about them! Next time I see you without them on, I'm reporting you individually to Dr. Carey and we'll call your parents. I don't want to see you walking on the heels of them one more time!" She pointed an accusing finger at Legolas.
"Wha-what?" he stammered, "this was the way my shoes were on when Gandalf sent me here!"
"What?" It was the lady's turn to be confused.
"They were already this way when I got here."
"Exactly, so I want you to put them on correctly next time!" Her stern face was almost more than Legolas could stand.
She disappeared into one of the stalls and Legolas hurried out of the room, Lissette and Alex following close behind. Once the two girls had left the restroom, they began to laugh hysterically.
"I don't get it. This place is just so strange." Legolas wondered out loud.
Lissette pointed to his shoes. "Jocelyn, you might want to put your shoes on. She'll might see you again."
Legolas sulked down and pulled the heels of his shoes up. The halls were empty now, almost everybody was at advisory/homeroom, and the three of them were alone.
All of a sudden, a short lady with short gray hair appeared from the corner. She looked at the three of them and smiled. "Hi, girls. Hi, Alex, hi, Lissette, hi…uh…what's your name again? Sorry, I'm bad with names."
"I am Leg—Jocelyn, of 205," Legolas replied, hurriedly correcting his mistake.
"Oh, yeah. Hi, Jocelyn! Shouldn't you girls be in advisory?" she asked.
"We're just going," Alex said quickly. Then when the lady had left down the hall, she grinned at Legolas. "Were you about to say 'Legolas?' Freak…"
Lissette laughed. "And what was with the 'of 205' part?"
"I'm from 205. And so are you," he added thoughtfully. "Wait!" he exclaimed, "did you say, Legolas?"
"Yeah," Alex said, "so?"
"How do you know Legolas?"
"How do you know Frodo?" Alex asked sarcastically.
"You know Frodo?"
"God!" Alex exclaimed, "What's wrong with you?"
"How did you hear about Frodo and Legolas?" Legolas asked, suspicious of her knowledge.
"It's called Lord of the Rings…" Lissette said slowly.
"What?"
"Nevermind!" Alex said, amazed at Jocelyn's sudden accumulation of stupidity.
Algebra Class - First Period
Legolas awoke to the bright sunlight shining in on his face. He squinted his eyes as he sat up. He looked around. He seemed to be in a strange room…perhaps it was some sort of convention, or a meeting of sorts. Perhaps a council? One man was standing in front of everybody, waving his hands madly as he scribbled numbers onto a white protrusion from the wall. There were nearly twenty people or so in the room, all sitting at small desks, some were writing things down, others were talking amongst themselves, others were sleeping, or nearly.
Legolas was sitting at a desk, near two other people. They looked like humans…only…weird. They had funny hair, funny clothing—then he looked down. He was wearing the same thing as everyone else! He was wearing a strange plaid skirt, a white collared shirt, white socks, and odd black and white shoes (which were really only half on). He jumped up with a shout. All the other funny human things looked up at him, including the man in front, whom Legolas presumed to be a king of some sort.
"Is there something wrong?" the man asked him.
"Agghhh!!!" Legolas shouted as he stared at the floor, "I'm short, too! Agghhh!!!"
"Jocelyn? Jocelyn?" the man inquired once more.
"It is a tragic day when Legolas Greenleaf, prince of Mirkwood, son of Thranduil is short!" Legolas cried indignantly.
"Jocelyn?!" the man shouted out of desperation.
Legolas looked up. "Why do you yell, your highness?" He looked around as he heard snickers and loud laughs from around him. Why were they laughing?
"Jocelyn, please sit down."
"What's a 'Jocelyn'?" More laughs, this time it was loud, belly laughter.
"Sit down."
This Legolas understood, so he plopped himself down onto the chair-like desk and began to sulk. The two other people sitting near him were trying to hold in their laughter, one dark-haired girl couldn't manage. She began to laugh loudly and uncontrollably.
Legolas looked at her, cocked his head sideways and asked her, "Why do you laugh?" This only made her laugh more.
"You…" she said between snickers.
He thought she spoke of how he was dressed, so he replied hotly, "I look just as stupid as you, so quiet, commoner!" She only laughed louder.
The "king" looked up at the girl, and she immediately stopped laughing (well, almost immediately).
"Lissette, Jocelyn, please stop talking," he said.
Legolas looked at the girl, her name must have been Jocelyn. So 'Jocelyn' is a name… thought Legolas. Wait! Then I must be Lissette! That's a woman's name! He wanted to jump up again, but he did not want to disturb the king, so he suppressed his panic. He sat in his desk, looking out the window, wanting to scream.
Gandalf said I would be a whole new person…but I didn't know he meant this new… Legolas pondered. All of a sudden he heard the name Lissette called by the king. He immediately hopped up.
"Yes, your majesty!"
The man looked surprised at this response. "Jocelyn, please sit down, and calm down."
Oh… Legolas thought, then I must be Jocelyn. Wait, is that a woman's name or a man's name? I've never heard it before. I supposed it's a man's name then. Gandalf would not have gone so far as to make me a woman! Phew!
The girl sitting across from him looked up at the protrusion from the wall which seemed to be a writing space and spoke a few strange numbers.
"x squared, y to the fourth," she said, pushing her spectacles further up the bridge of her nose.
I'm so glad I don't have glasses, Legolas thought to himself. Then, as he slowly moved his hand up to rub his eyes, he felt some barrier blocking the path to it. What is this? Some sort of force field? Oh, no! Glasses! I have glasses!
Legolas was nearly in a frenzy, he had to grip onto the edge of the table- desk-chair to keep from screaming. Instead, he let out a tiny whimper, but the king heard.
"Jocelyn, perhaps you can tell us the answer? What do you do to find the value of x?" the king asked.
"The value of x?" Legolas said, his eyes opening wide, "um…the value of x is…x. Correct?"
The king looked even more startled. "Well, yes, but I mean, in numbers."
Legolas let his eyes scroll across the writing surface. It was all foreign to him. Strange signs and letters mixed with numbers…it was all so confusing. Perhaps it is their language… he thought.
"5?" Legolas guessed.
"No," the king said, "think about it, what would it be if we wanted to find the square root of the quantity (x-3y)?"
"5?" Legolas guessed again.
"No…"
Okay, Legolas, he thought to himself, enough 5's, have to think of another number…
"35-30!" he shouted triumphantly, proud to have thought of another answer.
"No, that's still five," the king said, growing frustrated.
I have angered the king… Legolas said, becoming frightened.
"Kaitlin?" said the king, giving up on Legolas.
Legolas did not sit down at once, he did not know what a 'Kaitlin' was, or what it meant when he said it. He wasn't sure if it was some sort of command for punishment, or if it was an interjection. He remained standing, unsure of what was going on. Then he heard a voice behind him, he turned, and one of the girls he had been sitting with spoke up. This girl was tall, with shoulder-length blonde hair, and had no spectacles.
"Y is thirty two and after you plug it back into the equation, you can solve it for X and it's…" she looked down to consult her calculator (or what Legolas thought was some sort of animal), "fifty six!" she said.
Legolas sat down and used his excellent elven memory to remember these numbers. So Y is thirty two, and X is fifty six, he thought to himself. Then the king turned to him and asked him if he understood.
Legolas nodded. "Yes, your majesty."
The king gave him a strange look but resumed writing on the "wall." He wrote down another series of numbers and letters and then turned back to the elf.
"Okay, Jocelyn. What are the values of the quantities of X and Y?"
"X is fifty six, and Y is thirty two," he said triumphantly, evidently very pleased with himself.
The king shook his head, "No, look at the problem, Jocelyn."
"No? But you just established that X was fifty six and Y was thirty two, your highness."
"Please stop, Jocelyn. This 'your highness' thing is getting old. And please answer the question."
Legolas was now utterly confused. He thought he had already answered the question, and what did the king mean by " 'your highness' thing is getting old' "? Old?
"But you just said that the answer was fifty six and thirty two…" he said, furrowing his brow in frustration.
"This is a different question," the king explained.
Legolas became panicked. He had no idea what the king was talking about. He looked around him with wide, nervous eyes. What did he mean "different question?" Wasn't it the same question? He was asking for the values of X and Y, and Legolas thought he had given it to him. What a strange place, Legolas thought to himself, they ask the same questions twice. And what kind of questions are these, anyway? Why does the king want to know the values of letters? What kind of council is this?!
"It's the same question," Legolas reasoned finally, forcing his logic onto the others.
The king sighed, "No, look at the problem!" he exclaimed in exasperation and disbelief.
The elf focused as much as he could on the series of numbers and letters (which was pretty much gibberish to him), but he could not see anything. All of a sudden he had an idea. He picked up the nearest calculator to him and stared at it.
The girl looked at this odd creature and came up with the answer, perhaps it will tell me the answer also. He stared at it for thirty seconds, and everybody in the class watched him in silence, like they were observing some animal in a zoo.
Perhaps it's sleeping… Legolas poked at it a few times, and turned it on, though he thought he had awoken this "creature." Ah! It awakes!
The calculator screen was blank, so Legolas poked the calculator a few more times, hitting several random keys. He did not realize that everyone was focusing intently on him, amazed at his…weirdness. He had hit the buttons for the numbers five and six, and fifty six came onto the screen.
"Ah!" he shouted out loud, "success! I have proved myself correct. The answer is fifty-six, he told me so!" He pointed to the calculator.
The king put his head in his hands in despair. "Jocelyn, sit down," he begged, "please."
Legolas' pride was hurt, unable to control it any longer, he shouted out indignantly. "The answer is thirty-two and fifty-six! You told me so yourself, and then this…funny looking…creature confirmed it!"
"Jocelyn!" the king yelled, "either sit down or leave the room!"
"Why do you tell me the answer is thirty-two and fifty-six and then change your mind? How can X and Y have so many values? Why? Tell me! The sea is blue, grass is green, X is fifty-six, and Y is thirty-two! That's it! Why are you trying to confuse everybody?" Legolas was fuming.
"Please leave the room," the king said, finally losing all patience.
Legolas' face was hot as he spoke, "Fine. I know what you're up to. You're one of Saruman's conspirators! You're trying to confuse and hypnotize everyone!"
"Jocelyn!"
"I'm going, I'm going!" And then turning to the rest of the people, he said, "Don't believe him! He's evil!"
"For the last time, Jocelyn, leave the room or I will send you to Dr. Carey!"
"Don't say I didn't warn you!" he reprimanded the others, and then to the king he said sharply, "I'm watching you." Then with a quick huff, he stomped towards the door. Without another look at the rest of the people, he stormed indignantly out. He didn't hear (or chose not to hear) the incessant laughter as the door was closing behind him.
Once he was out, his confusion didn't cease. He was in a long corridor full of big doors and odd thin doors (lockers, but he didn't know that). What is this madness? he thought, Where am I? After a few moments of wandering up and down the halls, he figured it must have been a kingdom of some sort.
I'd better remember where I came from, so I can return later, even though I don't think that the king will gladly reprove my untimely exile. He looked at the door from which he had just come from. On it, it stated the numbers "205." It must be the name of the city. I'd better keep it in mind. He took a deep breath and exhaled. Not knowing where to go, he went to the right, towards the computer lab. The computer lab's door was the only door open, so he gladly stepped inside, eager for some guidance.
Of course, you must remember that Legolas had never seen a computer, and even with a machine as simple as the calculator, he was completely baffled. So you can imagine his wonderment when he saw a room filled with what he thought were "big animals." Most of the big animals were occupied, so he looked around for an free chair. Finding one, he sat down. The big animal in front of him was "asleep," so he poked it a couple of times and it woke up. He saw the other people put their hands on a strange tail-like thing protruding from the main bodice of the animal. He placed his hand on it as well. He then observed one girl putting a floppy disk into the hard drive, and his bafflement decreased.
It must be a food source of some kind. Perhaps they are feeding them? He looked around for something and saw a CD next to the keyboard (he thought the keys were the eyes of the animals, so you can understand his amazement when he saw people poking at the animal's eyes). Picking it up, he examined it thoroughly. Looks like a biscuit. Maybe it likes biscuits?
He tried to fit it inside the hard drive, but it wouldn't fit of course, so he broke it up into little pieces and "fed" them into the hard drive. There was a lot of shoving and pushing involved, but he finally got all the pieces inside. The screen of the monitor blinked several times, but then resumed its original state. Legolas, believing he had done the right thing, gave the monitor several pats on top of it, as if it was a dog.
It might be thirsty, he thought, after all, it just finished a meal. So he walked around looking for something to give to the computer-animal. He asked the girl next to him if she had something to drink, and she nodded suspiciously.
"What for?" she asked, eyeing him curiously.
"Can I borrow it for a second? Just really quickly, I only need a little bit," seeing her hesitation, he added, "it will take but a few moments. I won't use a lot."
She gave him a bottle of clear liquid. He untwisted the cap and sniffed at it, she watched him distrustfully. It smelled fizzy and sweet. He did not question her of the substance, he figured it was part of the diet of the computer-animal.
Legolas tilted the computer onto its back…or at least tried. He realized that his former strong elven muscles had wasted away to puny ones. He had trouble picking it up, but eventually he got it on its back. Then, pushing the flap of the hard drive open, he slowly poured the fizzy liquid into it. A split second later, he heard a shout from the girl next to him.
"What the fuck do you think you're doing?!" she shouted in disbelief.
"I'm fee-" he began, but he was cut off by strange crackling sounds coming from the computer. "Is it…supposed to do that?"
"No!" the girl said. People had begun to crowd around the sizzling computer in an entertained crowd.
All of a sudden, a lady stepped into the room, and seeing the crowd, demanded to know what had occurred. She had some problems being heard, but finally by the time she pushed through, she had already seen for herself. Legolas, scared and panicked, sneaked out in the clamor unseen, and left the crowd of girls huddling and shouting around the computer. He would let the other girl explain it all.
Well, how was I supposed to know it was going to get sick? he said, taking the blame for none of it whatsoever. As he was walking down to the other end of the corridor, he heard a low buzzing sound (which was the bell to signify the ending of first period), and almost immediately after, girls began scurrying out of the rooms. He noticed that most of them went straight off to what he thought were their houses (actually lockers) and placed their possessions inside. All of a sudden, he heard a loud yell from across the hall.
"JOBAS!" the voice shouted. Suddenly, someone jumped on him. He nearly fell down, even his elven balance had not prepared him for so violent an attack. He immediately regained his composition and got into a defending position, reading to ward off any blows.
The person who had jumped on him was a girl of about his height, with long, platinum blonde hair. She laughed. "Jobas, what are you doing?"
At the sight of her hair, Legolas let down his guard. She has the hair of an elf…is she an elf? he thought to himself. "Are you an elf?"
She laughed. "Ha! I wish. Come on, I have to show you the next chapter I wrote in my story!" she said, dragging him to her "house." She opened it and pulled a few sheets of paper out and handed them to him. "Read!" she commanded.
"Who are you?" he inquired, not quite tuned in to the fact she had just demanded he read her story.
"An Alex, what are you?" she said.
"Do I sense sarcasm?" he asked, his pride had already been hurt today, he was not going to let some common villager put him down.
"Aren't we bright?" she replied.
"Do I sense more sarcasm?"
"Wow, Jocelyn! You're just with it, today, aren't you?"
"With what?"
She laughed hysterically, but Legolas didn't see what was so funny. He blinked three times in rapid succession and continued staring at her.
"Come on," she said, "let's go get Lissette."
Lissette! he thought, I know who she is. But who is she? What's an 'Alex?' He threw a glance at the girl next to him.
She dragged him through the crowded hall to Lissette's house (locker). He recognized her as the girl with the dark hair who would not stop laughing at him.
"Jocelyn!" she said as she saw him, "What was going on with you today?"
Legolas' sense of pride was instilled once more in him. "Nothing, nothing at all. I just didn't agree with what the king was saying. I didn't understand all his values and X's and Y's and numbers."
"Like anybody does?" Lissette laughed, "Still, what did you have for breakfast? You were so completely insane!"
Breakfast… Legolas pondered. He had not had anything to eat in days, and the thought of a good elven breakfast made him even hungrier. "Nothing…I didn't have anything to eat."
"Whatever…" Lissette said.
Alex looked at Legolas and Lissette strangely, "What did she do?"
Lissette explained the whole thing, and Legolas clung onto the last shred of dignity he had bitterly. Every once in a while he interrupted with a few phrases, but that only made the two girls laugh even harder. He followed the two of them into the bathroom.
They were still laughing the whole time, and Legolas could not help but feel a little bit embarrassed. He remained standing next to a sink, playing with the funny knobs, watching in silent curiosity as water rushed out of the faucet as he twisted one of them. He turned around to find himself facing a mirror. He gaped in incredulity.
"So I am a girl?" he could not help but exclaim. Alex, who was waiting not too far away in the other corner of the restroom laughed as she stepped next to him so her own reflection appeared next to his.
"Well, I thought we had already established that, but of course I could be wrong," she said. She watched as Legolas walked up close and close to the mirror, opened his mouth, and examined his teeth.
"Wha…err…deez?" he asked, pulling his lips wide open to get a better look at the braces on his teeth.
Lissette laughed as she stepped out from a bathroom stall. "You've had them for a while, Jocelyn."
"Agghh!" he let out a frustrated groan as he picked at them with his fingernail.
"Those…are…braaaaces," Alex explained slowly, as if to a little child, "I…have…them…too."
But Legolas was not listening, he was too engrossed with his own problems as he let out a helpless cry. "They're not coming off! Agghh!" He kept pulling, but as he pulled, he felt it yank on his teeth, and the pain was annoying and made him want them off even more, so he pulled harder. Finally, he gave up. "It's hopeless!"
"Calm down," Lissette advised.
"Calm down? Calm down?!" he shouted, "I've got things invading my teeth!"
Alex and Lissette became worried. "Jocelyn," Alex began, "are you sure you're okay? You've been acting pretty weird lately. And you haven't even read my story!"
Legolas couldn't take it anymore. He took off his right shoe which had not been completely on his foot and threw it across the restroom door. At that exact moment as he was letting go of the shoe, a short-haired, blonde lady walked through, and the shoe missed her face by an inch. Lissette and Alex immediately turned around and hid their face towards the wall, trying not to laugh. Legolas remained sulking in the corner.
"Shoes!" the lady started, "I mean, Jocelyn! What have I told you about your shoes! I'm sick of telling you about them! Next time I see you without them on, I'm reporting you individually to Dr. Carey and we'll call your parents. I don't want to see you walking on the heels of them one more time!" She pointed an accusing finger at Legolas.
"Wha-what?" he stammered, "this was the way my shoes were on when Gandalf sent me here!"
"What?" It was the lady's turn to be confused.
"They were already this way when I got here."
"Exactly, so I want you to put them on correctly next time!" Her stern face was almost more than Legolas could stand.
She disappeared into one of the stalls and Legolas hurried out of the room, Lissette and Alex following close behind. Once the two girls had left the restroom, they began to laugh hysterically.
"I don't get it. This place is just so strange." Legolas wondered out loud.
Lissette pointed to his shoes. "Jocelyn, you might want to put your shoes on. She'll might see you again."
Legolas sulked down and pulled the heels of his shoes up. The halls were empty now, almost everybody was at advisory/homeroom, and the three of them were alone.
All of a sudden, a short lady with short gray hair appeared from the corner. She looked at the three of them and smiled. "Hi, girls. Hi, Alex, hi, Lissette, hi…uh…what's your name again? Sorry, I'm bad with names."
"I am Leg—Jocelyn, of 205," Legolas replied, hurriedly correcting his mistake.
"Oh, yeah. Hi, Jocelyn! Shouldn't you girls be in advisory?" she asked.
"We're just going," Alex said quickly. Then when the lady had left down the hall, she grinned at Legolas. "Were you about to say 'Legolas?' Freak…"
Lissette laughed. "And what was with the 'of 205' part?"
"I'm from 205. And so are you," he added thoughtfully. "Wait!" he exclaimed, "did you say, Legolas?"
"Yeah," Alex said, "so?"
"How do you know Legolas?"
"How do you know Frodo?" Alex asked sarcastically.
"You know Frodo?"
"God!" Alex exclaimed, "What's wrong with you?"
"How did you hear about Frodo and Legolas?" Legolas asked, suspicious of her knowledge.
"It's called Lord of the Rings…" Lissette said slowly.
"What?"
"Nevermind!" Alex said, amazed at Jocelyn's sudden accumulation of stupidity.