Disclaimer: I don't own HP or any of these characters. That belongs to JKR, Scholastic Books, Warner Brothers, etc.
Chapter One
The trouble with lies, from the liar's point of view, is eventually they catch up with you.
There is also the other slight problem that lies are addicting. Once a person starts to lie about something, it is hard to stop. All too easily lying can become a habit and a way of life. The experienced liar may sit in a large, tangled web of lies so convoluted that the liar does not even know the truth.
The truth has no such problems however. No matter how obscured it may become by the virtue of dozens upon dozens of lies, it sits still and waits for the chance to break free. No matter what the liar does to stop the truth from coming to light, it refuses to be caged. And once the truth is free, it can be a terrible force. The compulsive liar's world is oft built upon lie after lie. Just one shred of truth can be enough to bring it all down. When this finally happens, a bit of Muggle physics applies to even liars in the Wizarding World.
The bigger they are, the harder they fall.
****
They say that there is nothing certain in life except death and taxes.
Certainty, however, is not directly correlated with fear. There are many men out there who would rather face both death and taxes at once1 instead of having to deal with arranging a marriage. Most men, after having survived the horror that was their own wedding, live in fear of the day that their daughters would bring home a fiancé. Not only do they have to give their daughter's hand away in marriage, they would also have to deal with all the planning that was associated with weddings. Most men were horrified when their wives or daughters asked them about who should sit next to who and what flowers should be in what bouquets. Unfortunately, most women could hardly believe that men could be so foolish as to not have an opinion on such items. The end result is that most men would rather pay taxes twice than plan a wedding. That option would certainly be cheaper. There are also men who would rather be dead instead of have to plan a wedding. That option would certainly be easier.
Harry Potter is not one of these men. Having already faced death several times, he is positive that there could be nothing worse than being locked in a fight to the death upon the outcome of which hangs the balance of the lives of your nearest and dearest.
Harry is probably right. More likely than not, there is nothing worse than that.
However, weddings are one of the few things that can make you doubt that as Harry's going to find out.
****
1 In fact, in a large Muggle country somewhere off the west coast of
Britain, there are a few people who do face both at once. Yet no
matter how much they complain about facing the possibility during life,
all complaints cease after death, which implies that facing both at once
wasn't as bad as they thought it would be.
****
Ron had grown rather attached to the odd Muggle device. In fact, he had already given it a nickname—Trelawney.
Normally, giving nicknames to inanimate objects is not a very good indication of sanity even in the Wizarding World. Yet Ron was justified in this case for naming the fortune-telling device so. For some reason, no matter how he phrased the question, it always predicted death for the person he was speaking of.
"So will Harry make it through this week?"
Shake.
Highly doubtful.
"Will Ginny live to get her Hogwarts degree?"
Shake.
I wouldn't count on it.
"Will Dean and Seamus die of binge drinking tonight?"
Shake.
Go ahead and place your bets.
"Will Harry and Hermione do me a favor and kill Skeeter before I lose my mind?"
Shake.
In your dreams, buster.
Well, it be more correct to say that it predicted the deaths except for the one he wanted the most. But Ron had enough of playing with the magic 8-ball. He had to catch up with his wayward boss, who was about to trample in Hermione's flower garden.
Sure, if he did nothing, it might result in the painful death of Skeeter, but once Hermione was done with Skeeter, she was sure to turn her attention to him.
But before he did that, he had just one more question to ask.
"Will I live to see tomorrow?"
Shake.
I wouldn't start making any plans if I were you.
****
Ginny Weasley was not having a good day. So far, it had been so bad that she was prepared to label it the worst day any Weasley ever had to live through.
Unlike her older brother Ron, Ginny cared about the grades she received. She knew perfectly well from the long letters her mum sent in correspondence that finding a job after graduation was going to be difficult. The only thing that could make it easier was to pass her N.E.W.T.s with flying colors.
That would take a miracle. As things currently were, Ginny was going to fail Potions spectacularly. If she were lucky, she would be able squeak by in Transfiguration and Charms. Care of Magical Creatures was the only class that she was certain she could get a passing grade in.
The day had begun very badly, with Ginny missing breakfast as a result of staying up too late studying for Charms last night. The lack of food and sleep did not bode well for her concentration. That became all too clear in Potions.
Ginny had been in the midst of making a Polyjuice Potion as Snape had hinted rather broadly that it would appear on the test. Actually, saying that he had hinted was putting it mildly—he had all but threatened to ensure that every last obscure theoretical proposition behind the concoction of such a potion would be on the exam. They had all gotten the point. Each and every last student had spent the last three weeks preparing a batch.
Ginny's batch had exploded in her face today and ruined a perfectly good cauldron as well. She simply didn't have time to start over again and keep up with her study plan. On the bright side, Colin Creevey had offered to let her work along with him on his batch. On the downside, he had required that she join the Harry Potter fan club that he had created.
She had not wanted to say yes. Granted she did have the largest crush on Harry for a long time when she was younger but she was over that now. She had been over that for a couple years, almost as long as Harry and Hermione have been together. Once she saw them together, she knew that her crush was no good. Ginny could not stop liking Harry over night but with time, she was able to take him off the pedestal she had placed him on and see him as a human being. After that, it was remarkably easy to get over her schoolgirl crush.
However everyone else had a hard time believing that Ginny was over Harry. Her mother constantly reminded her that she did not have to attend the wedding if she did not want to. Her brothers would always stop talking about the wedding when she came around. It was enough to make Ginny want to scream. They didn't act the same way around Ron, who had acted more like a prat when he found out about Harry and Hermione. It was downright sexist of them to coddle her so.
Joining that blasted fan club was only going to make it worse. She agreed because she simply did not know what else to do. She had to do everything in her power to pass her tests. Ginny did not want to wind up like Ron, working for their brothers as a guinea pig.2
It simply would not do. She had to pass her tests with the best marks possible. She had to know how that stupid potion actually worked.
Sighing, Ginny took out a quill and a piece of parchment. If you had a question about Potions, there was only one person to ask.3 Hopefully, Hermione would be able to tell Ginny where she had gone wrong.
****
2 When she mentioned this fact to Ron, he had emphatically told her
not to mention that phrase in front of the prankster twins. Ron did
not want her to give them any ideas as being a sitting duck had been bad
enough. Ginny was too afraid to ask him to elaborate. Some
things were better left unsaid.
3 Technically, there are two people to ask but ignore what the other
Houses might say about Gryffindors—no Gryffindor is foolhardy enough to
ask Snape for help.
****
Planning a wedding was not an easy task, Hermione Granger thought to herself, especially when the love of your life was so adept at not making any decisions at all.
Making the guest list had been exasperating enough. Harry had only one requirement and that was the Dursleys were not to be invited. Hermione had no problems with that as she didn't look forward to meeting the people who had locked up Harry in a cupboard for most of his childhood. However, whenever she asked about Harry's opinion about other potential guests, he did not seem to care.
Hermione had expected Harry to agree when she asked if she should invite the Weasleys. He did. He also agreed when she invited Sirius Black, Remus Lupin and other close friends of theirs. That was also to be expected. Yet he also had agreed to invite Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle, which sounded like a very scary Muggle law firm in addition to being three of Harry's least favorite people. Hermione couldn't believe her ears when he had said yes.
That was when she realized that Harry would never say no to inviting anyone else. His requirements were as simple as not having the Dursleys attend. It was incredible. They had to cut down the guest list somehow and she was going to have to do it all on her own. Hermione had managed to trim the guest list from half the Wizarding World to a mere one hundred guests in one horrific weekend.
Now, however, her problem was flowers. More specifically, which types to decorate with along with what type of flower should go in whose bouquet.
Harry's requirements had once again been simple—no petunias. Of course, Hermione had never intended to use petunias in the first place so in other words, Harry was no help at all. She hoped that Harry would be of more help when it came time to chose caterers and dishes. She suspected, however, that he would be a typical male and not say no to any type of food.
Hermione had narrowed down the list of flowers by eliminating all magical blossoms. She didn't want to take the chance that she would accidentally pick a poisonous or worse, carnivorous flower to put in the bridesmaids' bouquets. That would not look good.
There were still plenty of flowers to choose from amongst ordinary blossoms, however. Hermione wanted to eliminate roses as she had always thought them too snobby but they were traditional. So she kept them on the list. Hermione was going to eliminate lilies because she wasn't sure what Harry's reaction would be and she did not want to have him crying at the wedding. Yet it would be very symbolic to have them there and besides, Hermione rather liked lilies. Hence another flower was kept on the list. Hermione had been attempting to weed out the list for the last several hours. So far she had only managed to eliminate daisies and that had been a hard decision to make. In the end, while daisies were a cheerful bloom, she did not think they would match the décor.
Of course, it would help if she had decided on the décor. All she knew right now was that everything was going to be in pastel colors.
It was times like these when Hermione wondered if she had made the right decision when she said yes to Harry's proposal. Hermione had expected to marry him ever since they started dating. Everything was so right about their relationship. She felt so in tune with him that it was amazing. There was no doubt in her mind that they were meant to be together.
She did wonder though if they were meant to be together so young. She had never thought that she would be the type to get married right out of school. Yet here she was, the first one of her year-mates to be engaged. She was the only one she knew that was planning for a wedding.
That was scary.
Commitment was not the problem. Hermione was more than ready to promise to stay with Harry forever. That was what had led her to say yes to his proposal. It was the idea of subsuming her identity in his that was truly frightening. In a few short months, she would be Hermione Grange no longer. She would be Hermione Potter, Harry Potter's wife. She wouldn't have a separate existence anymore—her name would always be tied inexplicably to his. Hermione loved Harry very much. She loved him more than she ever thought possible. However, she did not know if she was ready yet to say good bye to the girl she had been.
For while Hermione wanted to be by Harry's side, she still wanted to remain Hermione Granger for just a little longer.
****
Trying to get an insane gossip reporter out of a flower garden was easier said than done. Ron had foolishly thought that a mere warning would suffice but he was soon proven wrong.
"Stop!" Ron somehow managed to get out that warning before Skeeter stepping into Hermione's garden. Catching up to the insane gossip reporter had also been quite a task and he was now out of breath. Ron swore to himself that he would get back in shape if only he would survive this encounter with his friends.
"What? Where's the scoop?" Rita looked wildly around her surroundings, her hand automatically reaching for her Quick Quotes Quill.
"There's no scoop. You were about to step in Hermione's garden."
"Is that all?" Rita shook off his warning casually and continued on her path.
"No," Ron shouted and grabbed Rita by her sleeve, pulling her away from the garden.
"What now? Do you see Potter kissing some floozy somewhere around here? I always knew that he would dump that Granger twit."
Ron groaned aloud out of sheer frustration. "No, he's not. He wouldn't do that. He loves Hermione very much, as anybody with eyes could see."
Rita rolled her eyes. "That's what he would have you think. But I don't have time to quibble with naïve little boys today. If you excuse me, I have a scoop to catch." She pressed forward again but did not get very far because Ron was still hanging on to her sleeve.
"I told you—you can't go that way because you'll step in Hermione's garden. That would make Hermione mad and hex you away. Besides, the door's on the other side of the house." Ron mentally added a "you idiot" to that last sentence.
"Did you expect me to go up to the front door and knock? Do you actually think that Granger would actually open the door for me?"
"Well, she usually does open the door when people knock politely on it. She has the best manners of anyone I know."
"You have evidently been amongst the wrong type of people for too long," Rita pronounced. "It was your lucky day when you landed this job. Stick around and I'll teach you a few things about life."
Ron doubted that he would stay alive long enough to enjoy any life lessons that Skeeter might teach him. He knew he wouldn't live to see the sun rise if he didn't keep her out of the garden. "Yes, yes, I'm grateful and all that," he said, "but could we please use the front door? Hermione tends to get snippy when people trample on her flowers."
Rita eyed her apprentice warily and then glanced over at the window she had been heading towards. From here, it appeared as if no one was by the window anyway and so there was no use going there. She would just humor the dull boy for now. Perhaps if she did things in his obtuse way, she could fool Granger into letting down her guard.
"All right then, Dumb. We'll use the front door. Not that it will do us any good." She stomped off, upset that her plans had been thwarted, without looking to make sure that her apprentice was following her.
Ron sighed and followed his boss. Not only was she going the wrong way, she had yet to get his name right even once.
****
Author's note--It's taken forever to write this chapter and Rita still isn't any closer to getting shipped off to Timbuktu. In the next chapter, Ron gets a front row seat to Hermione v. Skeeter, part one, after which he decides to get roaring drunk. Too bad for him he doesn't like the game being played at the Three Broomsticks. ;) In any case, I would really like to hear what everyone thinks about this chapter. I've changed the format of the footnotes slightly. Please leave a review. Thank you!
To respond to previous reviews:
Female Fred: Thanks so much for letting me know you like how
the story is written even though you don't like the pairing. I truly
appreciate it.
Stoneheart: 42. I'm glad to know you like this fic--and
peanut butter and jelly sandwiches are evil. You have no idea
how many of them wound up on the ground or worse, on my shirt, when my
mom made them for me as a child.
Nappa: Well, Harry and Hermione do get married in the
timeline I have plotted out but they have a few things to work out first.
They are a little young for everything. ^_^ Did you catch that
or are you just so happy to see them together that you didn't realize that?
Jeremiah: Glad to hear you like it.
loz: I've slightly changed the format so all the relevant
notes are after the text section that they refer. I hope this works
better. I'm also posting a nice linky version to HP_Scribbles.
Too bad ff.net doesn't let me do the links as that is the obvious way to
go. I hope this chapter is easier to follow.
MythX: It's not so much a question of expanding it as it is
a question of writing it. I've most everything planned out, including
Skeeter's demise. All I have to do now is get there. ^_^
Dark Phoenix: Thanks ever so much for leaving the review.
I hope you like this chapter as well.