Help me.......and I'll give you a cookie

By Ender

Annoying voice from commercials: Last time on "A Walk through my Twisted Mind":

Ender: *Sitting in a movie theater with LbH waiting for the movie to start* I've been waiting for this movie for a while now.......SO DON'T MESS IT UP FOR ME!!!

LbH: *Ignoring Ender* I hope Frodo dies in this.....that would make a good ending.

Ender: You're an idiot.

Takui: I'm Takui and I'm Sephy's owner!

LbH: Good, its about time someone put a leash on him.....

Takui: I'm here to tell you to stop calling him Sephy or Sephers, only I can call him that.

Sephiroth: Can I kill him now?

Vincent: Can I help?

Ender: Can I not be killed?

Takui: Hmmmmm....I've said before that I'm both evil and insanely evil sooooo.....ok..

Sephiroth & Vincent: WHAT?!?!?!?!?

Ender: YES!!!! Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou!!!

Takui: GRAB HIM!!!!

Sephiroth & Vincent: *Grab Ender and hold him still*

Takui: *Pins a muse badge on Ender* Ok boys, lets go!

Annoying voice from commercials: And now back to the fic.

Kurai: *With whip in hand* WORK FASTER! Takui says we need this Multi-dimensional, Architecturally impossible palace finished by the end of the month!

Ender: *Dumping more magic bricks into a pile* If its Architecturally impossible, then wouldn't it be just a waist of our time trying to build it?

Kurai: NO TALKING! *Cracks whip*

Ender: *Whimper*

Random person: Hey, you need to learn the rules around here.

Ender: There are rules?

Random person: Not really, I just felt like making this fic sound more like a prison fic.

Ender: Yea, thats what I thought. Whats your name?

Random person: I'm just a random person, but i used to be an author named Poop-shooter

Ender: Your a monkey too?

Poop-Shooter: Huh?

Ender: Never mind. Hey, is there any way to get out of here?

Poop-shooter: Nope.

*Later that day*

Takui: Sephy, could you get me some slave to fan me? Its getting hot.

Sephy...uh....Sephiroth: Why don't you just turn up the air conditioning?

Takui: Because I think feel like picking on some poor little slave today.

Sephiroth: Fair enough. *Walks off*

*Outside*

Sephiroth: ENDER!

Ender: What?

Sephiroth: I have a job for you.....

*Five minuets later*

Ender: *Waving BIG fan by Takui* How did I get stuck doing this?

Takui: Faster!

Ender: *Waves faster*

Takui: Slower!!!

Ender: *Waves slower*

Takui: Oh! OH! Just a bit faster!!!!!!

Ender: *Waves "just a bit faster"*

Takui: That perfect...zzzZZzzzZZzzzZZzzzZZzzzZZzzzZZzzzZZ*SNORE*zzzZZ...

Ender: Yes! Now is my chance to escape!

Takui: *Eyes snap open* Not so fast buddy.

Ender: *Waves fan furiously* I CAN'T HEAR YOU MA'AM!!!!!

Takui: I'll make sure you get punished for this!

Ender: *Stops waving* Not if I can help it.

Takui: And what are you going to do?

Ender: *Brandishes a string with a cookie tied to the end of it* What about this?

Takui: Shit.....

Ender: *Swings cookie back and forth like a pendulum speaking hypnotically* Look at the Cookie.....

Takui: *Hypnotically* cookie.......

Ender: You like the cookie?

Takui: *Hypnotically* cookie.......

Ender: You want the cookie?

Takui: *Hypnotically* cookie.......

Ender: *Ties the non-cookie end of the string to a pendulum clock* Look at the cookie.....

Takui: *Hypnotically* cookie.......

???: ENDER! WERE HERE TO SAVE YOU!!!

Ender: *Turns to see Andreah, Zage, Psycho_monkey, Crazy_Insane_Girl, Zephyr and LBH standing in the doorway.*

Zage: We've come to spring you!

LBH: LETS GET GOING! THE WORKERS ARE GETTING PISSED!!!

Another random worker: ¡Vive la revolución!

Takui: *Hypnotically* cookie.......

Ender: LETS GET OUTA HERE!!!!

Sephiroth: *Appears behind Ender* Free Takui from your spell now!

Psycho_monkey: Nighty night Sephers.....*Shoots Sephiroth with a elephant tranquilizer gun*

Sephiroth: GAAAH!! *Falls to the ground unconcious*

Workers: DOWN WITH THIS STUPID PALACE!!!!!

Kinneas: *Appears out of nowhere* Hey! Let me help! *Brandishes Clarinet of doom*

Ender: KINNEAS! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

Kinneas: TOOOOOOOOOOOT!!

Everyone in area except for Kinneas, Zage, Psycho_monkey and Takui who all were for some strange reason not affected: GAAHH!!! *Drop to the ground unconcious*

Psycho_monkey: Woh, you really know how to kill a party....

Kinneas: ^_^;;

Zage: Lets get these guys outa here!

Takui: *Hypnotically* cookie.......

CRASH!!! WHAM!!!!!!

Zage: THE WHOLE PLACE IS COLLAPSING!!!!!!

Kinneas: O_O LETS GET OUT OF HERE!! *Opens porthole to Kalm*

Psycho_monkey: Dum-de-dum-de-dum... *Taking all the gil and materia from Sephiroth*

Zage: Psycho_monkey! COMMON!! THE PORTHOLE IS CLOSING!!!!!!!

Psycho_monkey: O_O *Grabs LbH and runs through the porthole*

CRASH!!! SMASH!!! BOOM!!!!

*In Kalm on the other side of the porthole*

Kinneas: Ok lets take an inventory check...Andreah!

Andreah: Here...(Groan)

Kinneas: Zage!

Zage: Here....

Kinneas: LbH and Psycho_monkey!

Psycho_monkey: Were here....

Kinneas: Crazy_insane_girl!

Crazy_insane_girl: *SNORE*

Kinneas: Uh..I'll count that as a "here"....Zephyr!!!

Zephyr: HERE! ^_^

Kinneas: Kinneas!!!

Everyone: O_o uh......

Kinneas: OH NO!!! WE LEFT KINNEAS BEHIND!!!!

Zage: Uh...you are Kinneas...

Kinneas: Oh...yea... ^_^;

Andreah: O_O WHERES ENDER!!!!

*Midgar*

???: Hey kid, are you ok?

Ender: *Eyes shut* Uh...ugh...I...don't know....

???: I'll take care of you for a while...

Ender: Ugh...zzzZZzzzZZzzzZZzzzZZzzz

*Two days later*

???: Ender? When your done sweeping the floor can you help Marlene wash the dishes?

Ender: *Sigh* Yes Tifa.

Tifa: ^_^ Thanks! I'm going to go meet Cloud for our date!

Marlene: Bye Tifa!

Ender: Cya. *Turns to the readers* Well, another fine mess Zage and LbH have gotten me into. Next time maybe they will remember to grab ME next time they escape.

Marlene: Ender! I thought Tifa told you to stop that!

Ender: Sorry.

*At the remains of Takui's Palace*

Takui: *Hypnotically* cookie.......

Sephiroth: *SOB* TAKUI! YOU HAVEN'T SNAPPED OUT OF IT FOR TWO DAYS!!! *SOB* PLEASE COME BACK TO US TAKUI!!!

Clock: *Stops ticking*

Takui: Huh? Whats going on?

Sephiroth: *Hugs Takui* TAKUI! *SOB* YOU'RE OK!! *Sniffle Sniff*

Takui: *Prys Sephiroth off* Sephy! Whats going on? Where is Ende-- *Notices everything is in ruins* ENDER!!! I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS!!! LOCK YOUR DOORS!!! I'LL FIND YOU!!!!!!

Kurai: *Pokes her head out of a coffen* SOME OF US ARE TRYING TO SLEEP!!!

Takui: Sorry.....

A/N: Sometimes I wish that my life had a rewind/erase button.....LOL READ AND REVIEW PLEASE!!!!!